AN: This is very long. I do not intend on having multiple chapters unless you all would like me to. I'm still working on my other one so don't worry! I just had to get this out of my system. :) Thanks for reading!

'Dear, Miss Rachel Berry,

We are sorry to inform you that you've been denied access to the New York Academy for the Dramatic Arts. We please ask that you...'

Dropping the white, perfectly folded letter, Rachel fell to her knees in the walkway of her empty dark house. Her trembling hands flew to her eyes and she crouched into a ball of nothingness on the rug, putting her head against her upper thighs and beginning to shake, tears unable to form in her eyes from utter shock of what she had just read. It wasn't real. Her teachers, Mister Schuester, all her friends, both her dads, Quinn, they all said she was completely insane for thinking Carmen Tibideaux would not accept her.

Yet, here she was, her body on fire and her nails digging into the palms of her hands, unable to stop herself from shaking. She had disappointed everyone she was associated with, they all believed in her and here she was, a completely pathetic disappointment. To everyone.

She had just gotten home from rehearsal when she stopped briefly at the mailbox, noticing the red flag, indicating the mailman had stopped by. Her heart heart stopped when her eyes stopped on the NYADA crest on the front off a white envelope directed to her, Rachel Berry. Then, throwing the mail in her bag, she ran inside, shutting the door behind her and setting her bag on the floor next to the table by the entrance. Ten minutes later she would find herself opening the letter and coming face to face with her worst nightmare, something she had dreamed about happening every night. Being a loser in the most important competition she'd ever have to compete in.

What would her fathers say when they came home and found their star-bound daughter a cripple mess on the floor of their favorite rug. The years of ballet, dance and vocal lessons going to waste as well as the countless pep talks and endless hours of crying because her feet burned with blisters from the amount of work she had performed that day at ballet, or her voice aching from the never-ending high notes she belted out. The tears would come then.

What would Kurt say when she told him he would have to leave to New York without her, take the city by himself without his Barbra to complete him. Finding his way on his own with only his mind and the school to guide him in the right direction. Perhaps the tears would begin there instead.

What would Mister Schuester as well as the rest of the Glee club say when she announces her failure in front of the choir room, the same room where she had so many heartwarming solos, duets and group numbers. They would laugh in her face telling her they told her so and ask why she was being so naive, why she actually thought going to New York was where she belonged because there were about a thousand other girls in Ohio alone with the exact dream. That hurt terribly, the tears would cover her face then.

Or maybe when she confronts Quinn, telling her girlfriend of almost a year she wouldn't be able to use the Metro Passes she bought for the both of them as a present to help with their soon-to-be long distance relationship. Her intelligent, beautiful, strong girlfriend who was part of the early admission to one of the most prestigious schools in the country. Yale University. The hurt she would see in the girl's breathtaking, hazel eyes when Rachel revealed her terrible news. Maybe she wouldn't break up with her, Quinn was scared Rachel would want to break up her once before when the girl found out her very big secret. A secret she kept in her pants underneath her dresses. But these were completely different circumstances, Rachel's career was on the line, well, technically it wasn't anymore.

The tears would come then.

They had to come. This is what happened when you didn't get accepted to the college you wanted, you cried your heart out, hated the world, hated everyone for getting what they wanted, but for some reason, she was unable to hate anyone but herself. She couldn't search deep enough and find someone to blame for her mistakes. It was only her. Alone.

Yet, the tears failed to show.

It wasn't until her dads arrived later on when Rachel actually moved. They found her in the dark, staring at a Judy Garland portrait the Berry's had received as a gift during Hanukkah one year. She continued to stare, both her legs held up against her chest with her arms wrapped around them to hold her there securely. It wasn't until her dad, LeRoy Berry, reached down to pick her up, one arm under her knees and the other on her upper back. Instinctively she went to wrap her arms around his neck and stayed there until she felt him slowly make his way up the steps. He continued to her room and then set her down gently on her bed where there was already tea, a stack of Barbra movies, tissues and other things that didn't interest her at the moment.

Hiram Berry was already sitting on her bed, the covers pushed out and ready for her to cover herself. LeRoy stood up and spoke to her softly, but she was unable to hear anything that came out of either of their mouths. She just turned her body and let her eyes shut because they stung an awful bit, she wasn't even sure if she had blinked since she scanned the letter. Almost instantly she was taken away by her dreams, the scent of lavender filling the air to let her escape reality for a few hours.

"She hasn't been out of her room since Friday, Quinn. We've heard the shower a few times, more than necessary, actually. It's been her thing since she was a little girl. She takes showers when she's hurt." Hiram Berry said, offering Quinn more tea. She politely declined before looking towards the stairs, worry filling her eyes.

"I don't even know what's going on, Mister Berry." Quinn replied, looking towards the man. "Would you mind telling me? I've called and texted a numerous amount of times. She hasn't spoken to me since after school Friday, we were suppose to have a date night and she never showed." Quinn said, biting her lip. "Is she hurt?" Quinn asked again.

"Physically, no. Mentally, completely." LeRoy Berry replied, sighing heavily while removing his glasses and wiping his hand down his stressed face before putting his glasses back in place.

"We don't exactly think it's us who should tell you this information, Quinn, I think Rachel would prefer to let you know instead. We do have to head out in a few minutes though for the rest of the night as we've had a work call. We appreciate you coming and watching her until the morning." Hiram said, going to his and his husband's luggage to carry to the door, LeRoy and Quinn following him.

"Of course, I'm happy to be here for her, you know this. I'll be here all night, I'll answer if you need to check in as well." Quinn stated, walking with the both men to the door.

"If we're not working with our patient we will check in briefly." LeRoy responded, opening the door for Hiram who said a goodbye to Quinn then made his way to the car to put the baggage in the trunk and start up the engine.

"Just try to check on her, please. She's been very quiet, we left a few tea bags on the counter, try to give her one every now and then." LeRoy said towards Quinn.

"She's my girlfriend, Mister Berry, I'm sure she'll be fine." Quinn said with a not so humorous laugh.

"Thank you, Quinn." LeRoy said one last time before extending his arms and embracing Quinn in a warm hug.

Sighing deeply, Quinn made her way inside the Berry house, closing the door behind her and listening to the dead quiet house, her overnight bag on the couch in the living room where she would most likely be sleeping for the night. Never in her time that she had been dating Rachel did she think she would be sleeping on the couch alone with her girlfriend upstairs in her room in a huge empty house. Hearing the shower start upstairs, she decided to turn a light on in the living room and watch television until she heard the water stop.

It wasn't until about an hour later did she hear it stop then the shower curtain open. The thought of her girlfriend naked and wet upstairs sending a jolt though her body and making her limp cock now semi erect. Looking down at her dress she noticed the bulge that began to appear. Shaking her head, she decided to put those thoughts out of her head and went to her bag to change into a comfortable pair of spanks and her Cheerios workout shirt. The spanks did a terrific job of hiding her package.

After a few minutes of pacing downstairs, Quinn decided to make the tea and head upstairs, her heart beating furiously. She wasn't even sure what was going on with the girl and was completely worried it was something to do with NYADA, but it couldn't be, Rachel was a star, she had incredible talent.

As she finally hit the last step, she witnessed Rachel's bedroom door slightly ajar, the faint noises of her moving around to put clothes away filling the hallway. Gulping slightly, Quinn said slowly before entering the room, "Rach? Baby, I'm here." Her voice soothing as she pushed open the familiar door with the gold star on it, a pink 'R' in the middle. "I made you some tea, too. Your dad's had to leave on a trip for the night...Rachel?" Quinn said again, watching as the petite girl went to sit on her bed, her gold star shorts revealing her thighs and the small white v-neck showing off her bra-less chest. "What happened, Baby?" Quinn was now moving closer to the brunette whose eyes, she now noticed, were completely puffy, her nose red and her hair wet from the shower. Setting the tea down on her counter next to a completely full cup, Quinn went to sit on the side of Rachel's bed where she had mimicked her position a few days earlier, her legs up to her chest and her arms wrapped around them.

"I wasn't accepted." Rachel said simply, a blank stare on her face as she stared straight at her bathroom door.

"You...what?" Quinn asked, unable to believe what she had just heard.

"Don't make me repeat it, Quinn." Rachel's voice began to crack slightly at the words, a fresh wave of tears engulfing her as she turned over quickly to lay down on her side.

"Rachel..." Quinn sighed out. She was at a loss for words, nothing coming out of her mouth at all. Instead, she began to move close to the girl, laying down behind her and holding her close as Rachel began to shake violently, the cries filling the room. Quinn held on to her that much harder, tears filling her eyes as well, the salty drops touching her dry lips. "It's going to be okay, Rachel. You're going to be okay, I promise." Quinn kept saying over and over, holding even tighter than before.

Twenty, thirty, forty-five minutes passed until Rachel had calmed down, her hand locked with Quinn's on her side, Quinn moving stray brown locks out of the girl's face and kissing her temple lightly every now and then. "It's going to be okay." Quinn said, saying it more to herself than anything.

"I want...I want this pain to go away." Rachel said a few minutes later, a small sob shaking through her body.

Getting up from her spot, Quinn kissed Rachel on the cheek. "I'll do whatever I can for you, Rachel. I'll stay with you, I'm not leaving." Quinn assured her, leaning against the backboard of the bed. "I promise."

Looking up at her, Rachel began to push herself up then moved to straddle Quinn's lap. Quinn welcomed her openly, wrapping her arms around Rachel's back and running her nails up and down the girl's back as she laid her head against Quinn's chest listening to the steady, relaxing heartbeat. Rachel felt a few kisses to the top of her head as Quinn continued with the stroking of her back.

Looking up with watery eyes, Rachel went to place a kiss on Quinn's lips, the taste of her favorite cherry Chapstick on Quinn's lips. Deepening the kiss slightly, Rachel let her hands fall to Quinn's waist, Quinn's hands on either side of Rachel's face. Breaking the kiss slowly, Quinn went to gaze into her girlfriend's beautiful eyes. "Whatever you need, I'm here, okay?" Quinn said again. Rachel's watery eyes closed, a tear falling down her red, damp cheeks when she nodded.

"I need...you." Rachel said, pressing a chaste kiss to Quinn's lips once again, Quinn's cock twitching lightly at the small pressure Rachel had presented the girl with. A small moan escaped Quinn's lips. Leaning back, Rachel removed her shirt and threw it to the floor, revealing her bare breasts in front of Quinn. She gulped lightly, staring at her breathtaking girlfriend in front of her.

"I don't want you to hurt anymore, Rachel. I want to make you feel better." Quinn went to move her lips from Rachel's neck down to the column of her neck, collarbone and then the small of her cleavage. Kissing the skin there, she moved lower until she licked at a nipple, her hands moving to the small of her back. Any other time she would move her hands to Rachel's beautiful ass, but this wasn't for her pleasure, it was for Rachel. So instead she squeezed gently there, her eyes shut tight and tongue swirling the bud in her mouth while her dick continued to harden in her pants.

Rachel's hands had tangled in blonde hair, her panties suddenly becoming damp as she felt the hardening member below her part her pussy lips even through the spanks and shorts. Tears still falling from Rachel's eyes, she pushed Quinn's face up from her breast to look at her. With a tired face, Quinn watched as Rachel planted yet another kiss on her lips. Moving her hands to the bottom of her shirt, Rachel pulled it off of Quinn in one quick motion before throwing it to the ground, their lips breaking for a brief second before being reconnected again. She then went to slowly pinch at Quinn's left nipple before feeling a hand on top of her own.

"This is about you, Baby." Quinn said, looking up at the girl and kissing her nose. More tears fell from Rachel's eyes and this time fell on Quinn's bare chest, the drops feeling like fire on Quinn's skin. Nodding, Rachel stared down at Quinn's spanks, noticing the very large tent there. Reaching down, she massaged lightly hearing a small groan come from Quinn's mouth before reaching in and grabbing her member and releasing it into the open air, the small bit of precome at the tip and a few small veins throbbing on the side of the large cock.

"You sure about this, Rachel?" Quinn asked, huffing slightly to keep her composure. "Don't do this for me, I want it to be for you."

"I want you, Quinn. I need it." Rachel responded, looking into her eyes deeply, searching them. She noticed Quinn do the same before nodding and letting Rachel continue, using her in any way she needed.

"Whatever you need." Quinn assured her, running her slender fingers through her brown hair yet again as Rachel rubbed herself through her shorts, making sure she was ready for the intrusion. Her instant heaving chest and moaning was a very good sign of her readiness.

Pushing the left leg hole aside as well as her panties, Rachel stroked Quinn's cock a few times before lining her up with her own hole. Looking down at Quinn, Rachel made eye contact with the girl as she slid the thick length in her tight self, the feeling of being filled wrapping around her completely and shutting her eyes instantly. She heard the small groan from Quinn and witnessed her head fall back against the headboard. Her hands going to her waist, Quinn began to breath a bit more to control herself.

"Give me a second, please." Rachel replied, her eyes shut as the pain began to fade.

"Take all the time you need, Rachel." Quinn replied with closed eyes.

Finally Rachel began to push herself up off of her cock before pushing herself down, eliciting a moan from her lips after each time, the tip of Quinn's cock hitting her most intimate spot inside her. "Quinn, you're so perfect." Rachel said, moving her hands to Quinn's shoulders to help with the motions.

"You're perfect, Rachel. And you're beautiful and smart." Quinn replied, opening her eyes to look at her girlfriend who was now bouncing up and down on her dick. "You're so tight, Baby." Quinn said again, revealing a moan from Rachel's lips.

Moving faster, Rachel began clenching her inner muscles around the thick length inside her, Quinn groaning in response. Before long, Quinn began her own thrusts up to meet Rachel's only adding to pleasure the both were feeling.

"You're so beautiful." Quinn said again through a strained breath. "So perfect."

"I want you to make love to me, Quinn." Rachel whispered out, her hips slowly stopping, Quinn following her lead. Looking up at the girl, she nodded slowly before planting a kiss on her and almost gracefully switching their positions to where Quinn was now on top in between Rachel's legs, her cock still buried deep inside the safe confines of Rachel's pussy.

"I will, Rachel." Quinn said, kissing down her neck and sucking lightly at the skin there. Pulling out slowly, Rachel moaned when Quinn broke away both of them feeling the instant loneliness.

Pushing herself down, Quinn began to pull the gold star shorts down as well as her purple panties to reveal Rachel very wet lips, aching to be touched. Quinn's mouth watered instantly. Throwing the shorts over her shoulder, Quinn put one of Rachel's legs over her shoulder for better access.

Rachel let her breathing even before putting both hands on either side of her to prepare herself to begin squeezing at the sheets. She felt a slight blow on her clit, Quinn knowing how much Rachel loved it when she blew there, the sensation driving her crazy while her walls clenched around nothing.

Slowly, Quinn stuck her tongue out and let the tip run up against her wet folds, collecting the glorious juices on her tongue until she reached the bundle of nerves. She began swirling her tongue around the sensitive area, Rachel releasing various oh's and uh's as her chest began to heave.

Flattening her tongue over her clit, Quinn began teasing the area around her hole before entering a finger knuckle deep. Hissing lightly, Rachel let a hand fly to her breast, squeezing gently there as she opened her legs a bit more for Quinn, unable to stop the slight movement of her hips.

Feeling the soft patch inside Rachel, Quinn began to slip in another finger just as she began grinding against the bed below her, sandwiching her cock against the bed to relieve pressure. Pushing her fingers inside faster, Quinn's lips went furiously at Rachel's clit until she felt the tale-tell signs of her approaching orgasm.

"Quinn, I'm so close!" Rachel yelled out. Quinn moaned against Rachel as her hips worked against the bed, her cock outrageously hard.

'Come on, Baby. You can do it. Come for me." Quinn thought in her head, her eyes closed gently as she tried to concentrate more, her hips continuing against the bed. With a loud cry, Rachel came around Quinn's fingers, her pussy walls clenching at her fingers as her juices coated her fingers sweetly, Quinn still going fast at her clit to allow Rachel to ride out her orgasm.

"Oh, God!" Rachel yelled out, tangling her hands in blonde locks and twitching violently against Quinn's mouth.

Satisfied with her work, Quinn pulled out slowly, a small twitch coming from Rachel as she did so. She then began to lean up, stroking her dick in her hand before leaning down to kiss Rachel's lips gently, lightly. Pulling her spanks down all the way, she thrw them off and positioned herself back.

"Ready, Baby?" Quinn asked, still stroking her dick slowly. With her eyes shut, Rachel nodded, the pain still prominent on her face. Quinn furrowed her eyebrows as she slowly bent her knees to enter in Rachel's still tight hole before sighing in relief at the wonderful pressure it presented her dick with.

Grabbing on to her thighs and spreading them lightly, Quinn went to look down at Rachel who was now staring up at Quinn, watery, red eyes now even worse. Pushing in more, she witnessed she slight arch in Rachel's back as she began filling her yet again. "Tell me if you need me to stop, I know how sensitive you can be." Quinn groaned out, her nails digging into Rachel's thighs slightly.

"Just...start." Rachel strained. Quinn nodded and began at a slow pace, pulling out almost all the way before pushing back to the hilt, both of them groaning in the process.

Now setting a steady pace, Quinn stared at Rachel as she pushed her head left and right slowly, moaning when she would hit that special spot deep inside her. Deciding to move her hands, Quinn snuck them to Rachel's, both locking tightly together in pairs as they both squeezed against each other.

The steady slapping of her testicles against Rachel's ass added to the fire in the pit of Quinn's stomach as she felt herself approach orgasm soon. Her breathing began to quicken and the hold she had on Rachel's hand began to tighten.

"Faster, Quinn." Rachel gasped out, almost completely out of breath as she began to break out in a sweat, Quinn felt a bead of her own sweat fall down the side of her temple as she nodded watching the girl below her shut her eyes even tighter.

"Like this?" Quinn asked, her pace now a bit faster.

"More." Rachel commanded, her hips now moving up to meet Quinn's.

Her cock now being suffocated inside Rachel's tight walls, Quinn began pounding inside Rachel, determined to soak up all the hurt in the process. She heard Rachel cry out her moans as her head few back more and more into the pillow.

"Quinn, I'm so close, don't stop!" Rachel sobbed.

"I'm not stopping, I'm here for you." Quinn hissed out, her eyes fixated on Rachel. Her muscles flexing and the small sheen of sweat breaking out over her body. Quinn felt the quick tightening in her belly. "Rach, look at me. Open your eyes, Baby, and look at me." Quinn asked, sweetly.

Opening her eyes lazily, Rachel was met with desperate eyes, desperate to make her perfect girlfriend feel as if she could take on the world just as before.

"You're unbelievable perfect and I..." Quinn gulped, feeling a large lump in her throat. "I love you, Rachel." Quinn said, pounding away at the tender walls below her. Rachel was moving up and down against the bed from the force of Quinn's pounding before pushing herself up and wrapping her arms around the girl's neck and smashing her lips against Quinn's.

"I do, I love you." Quinn said, once the kiss was broken.

"I..oh, Quinn!" Rachel cried out as Quinn pounded once more, her walls clenching around the cock deep inside her. "I love you, Quinn! I love you!" Rachel yelled into the air as she heaved for air.

Pushing herself deeper in Quinn moaned out, letting hot, thick ropes of come splash against Rachel's walls, coating her insides while still thrusting vigorously.

"I love you." Quinn whispered into Rachel's ear when she finally collapsed onto the smaller girl. "I want you to know that. I love you with all my heart, with everything I am and I will make sure you're happy again." Quinn still whispered, pulling Rachel close to her as she felt new tears on her.

"I love you so much, Quinn." Rachel sobbed out, her legs wrapping around Quinn's waist tightly. "Don't leave me, please. Just stay right here for a little while."

"I'll stay here for as long as you need me." Quinn replied, her cock now going limp inside Rachel's wet hole, their juices mixed together. "I'm not going anywhere."

Slowly, Quinn pulled out and settled herself next to Rachel on the bed once she had finally fallen into a deep slumber. She pulled Rachel onto her chest and began playing with her hair soothingly until her eyes slowly began to close, falling asleep to the scent of Rachel's apricot scrub. "I always be here." She said before closing her eyes completely.