It was stupid. It was always something stupid. He had a bad day, he had a migraine, those were the excuses for his attitude and the reasons behind the nasty words he never meant and oh god had he really called Kurt's voice annoying?! He loved Kurt's voice, it was beautiful; everything about Kurt was beautiful. He was ready to beg for forgiveness and apologize over an hour ago when he found the note on the fridge. The note that told him in Kurt's beautiful script that he went to go get some more milk. All he could do while he waited was just replay the whole thing in his mind forever naming it:

The incident where Blaine cried over spilled milk:

Blaine walked in the apartment shrugging off his jacket and kicking off his shoes, leaving them all by the door. Further into the apartment he could hear some music adding to his already pulsing headache. The sight he walked into was almost overwhelming. The table was set with candles and flowers and the cloth napkins that they only used for special occasions. He walked over to the calendar in the kitchen searching for any indication of something important that might of slipped his mind.

"Don't worry it's not an anniversary or a birthday" Kurt giggled. He gave a half smile at him as he received a kiss on the cheek and a glass of wine. "I just thought we could have a romantic evening together" he continued. Blaine hummed in acknowledgement. "Do you mind grabbing the milk for me before you go make yourself comfortable at the table?" Blaine silently went to grab the milk. As he handed it over to Kurt accidently letting go before Kurt had a grip on it. He quietly swore under his breath, nothing was going right today. "It's okay. I got it. You just go sit, enjoy the wine, I'll clean this up and then bring out dinner."

"Sorry, but I'm not that hungry tonight, Kurt. I think I am just going to call it a night and go to sleep early." Blaine said with a heavy sigh. Kurt froze slowly looking over at the table for a second and then at Blaine. "But … I made dinner. I'm almost done making the dessert."

"I know but-"

"Blaine, we don't see enough of each other. I miss you. Is it too much to ask to have a romantic evening with my boyfriend?" Kurt continued not stopping for Blaine to get a word of his explanation in.

"We'll just do it another night" Blaine tried to reason his patience dwindling.

"No it has to be tonight. I made dinner," Kurt stressed gesturing to all the dirty pots and pans.

"It is not that big of a deal" Blaine started raising his voice.

"It is to me!" Kurt's pitch began to slowly get higher making Blaine's head slightly pound.

"Kurt, I have a headache I want to lay down," He complained with an edge in his voice. "You're just hungry, go sit. I'll bring you dinner," Kurt rushed the words out as he continued to push Blaine to the table.

Then he snapped. Patience lost, anger built up. Kurt wasn't listening. He would have to make Kurt stop talking and force him to listen. "No Kurt, you are not listening to me! I am not 'just hungry'," he snapped slightly mimicking the high pitch of Kurt's voice, "do you even know how much you sound like a girl right now?! Your voice is so damn annoying and right now I just want quiet but you won't shut up about dinner, you are not my mother or my housewife. I don't need you squealing and screeching at me about how you slaved over a hot stove all day to make me dinner!" After his rant he stormed to the bedroom, slightly slipping on the spilled milk that was still puddled on the kitchen floor.

When Blaine came back out later ready to apologize, after a nap, and feeling quite guilty, he found the note.

Went to the store to get some milk. I'm sorry I pushed and didn't listen. Text or call me if you need me to pick you up aspirin or anything for your head. There is a plate for you if you get hungry in the fridge. Love you forever and always.

Xoxo,

Kurt

Blaine looked at the note and sighed. It had been a long time for Kurt just to be going to get milk. He texted him over twenty minutes ago, but when Kurt didn't answer he figured maybe he had just needed to clear his head more or calm down before he came home. Maybe Kurt just got caught up talking to someone, it has happened before. Maybe he stopped somewhere else or got caught up reading a tabloid magazine he always read but never bought.

He heated up his dinner and sat down at the still nicely set table minus the candle lighting. His heart ached a little when he saw the red and yellow roses. He would fix it when Kurt got home. He would take Kurt out to any restaurant of his choosing, make sure they got a nice private table, and let him order anything and all that he wanted off the menu. His planning took a pause when he reached for the cloth napkin noticing the small velvet black box discreetly hidden under his elegantly folded napkin. With shaking hands he slowly opened the box seeing a slim, simple, shiny ring.

Blaine was frozen. His heart raced threatening to beat out of his chest. Had Kurt planned on proposing to him? Guilt bubbled in his stomach, pushing his heart into his throat. He pushed his plate away knowing he had to find Kurt right away. He started calling as he grabbed his coat and pocketed the ring ready to run out the door.

That was the night Blaine found Kurt broken, bruised, bleeding, silently screaming, coughing and gasping for air in a dark ally. That was the night Blaine talked nonsense and apologizing to Kurt while they waited for the ambulance to arrive. That was the night Blaine learned why you never cry over spilled milk.

The hospital visits were bad. It was a time of uncertainty of if Kurt would recover; if he would be brain damaged, if he would ever speak again. The doctor explained it to him, twice, his vocal chords were damaged and they were unable to predict how or if they would heal. That there was brain swelling causing Kurt to have trouble reading, speaking, as well as experience memory lapses, and extreme mood swings.

Bringing Kurt home was scary. The first night back when they had went to go to sleep after getting Kurt settled in bed Blaine went to lie next to him, he could feel Kurt stiffen for a few moments then slowly struggle to get out of bed and leave to go to the couch. It took another hour and thirty minutes to get Kurt settled back into bed with extra reassuring that Blaine would sleep on the couch until Kurt was ready and comfortable with them sharing a bed again. Blaine wasn't certain but he was sure sometimes Kurt would forget where he was or what he was doing. Sometimes it was bad enough to cause Kurt to panic. He worried that there were moments Kurt forget he was mute. He feared there would be a time Kurt would forget him. He wondered if Kurt sometimes didn't even understand what Blaine was trying to say to him.

Taking care of Kurt was a lot of work and it took more patience than he thought he had in him, but he loved Kurt and the idea of leaving him made his heart want to turn to stone and shatter into rubble. Blaine needed to do almost everything for Kurt, cook for him and made sure he ate; made sure he would shower and use soap (not just stand or sit under the running water). He made sure Kurt would brush his teeth. He helped Kurt get dressed and style his hair. He helped Kurt with his nighttime skincare routine. He made sure Kurt took his medicine, and made it to all his doctors' appointments.

The worst things were when Kurt would not look Blaine or would not really look at anything, his eyes open but lost with a hazy gaze over them that made Blaine feel like Kurt wasn't really there. And sometimes Kurt would get so angry at things that he would throw plates and nock over tables and lamps and throw fits of pure rage. Kurt would also have nightmares causing him thrash his body around and to try to scream out but no sound would ever escape from him. However, it was the silence that got to Blaine the most. It was the wish that gave him this. He knew it was his fault that this all happened, if he hadn't come home in a bad mood and fought with Kurt, Kurt would not have had to go out to get milk and he would have never ran into those guys that hurt him, that raped him, that left to suffer and die.

Sometimes Blaine cried. Sometimes Kurt cried. Blaine always stayed and continued to love Kurt. Blaine kept the ring waiting for Kurt to ask him. Sometimes he would catch Kurt looking at the ring and he'd just remind Kurt that he would say yes, but he was just waiting for Kurt to be ready to ask him and that he didn't mind waiting forever and a day.

Time continued on, days turned to weeks; weeks to month, with the months passing came season changes and it was not long before December rolled around. Kurt was now okay by himself. He was able to do simple tasks by himself, plus his mind was a little clearer. He still had his episodes but at least Blaine didn't have a constant fear settled in his stomach, nevertheless if they ever needed milk Blaine made sure he went to get it.

Blaine woke up as the sun peaked through the broken blinds he still had to replace; he felt a weight pressed against him as he tried to move and shift. He opened his eyes and blinked a few times his eyes as his adjusted to the light. He smiled as he saw Kurt snuggled comfortably half of his body between Blaine and the couch and the other half sprawled on top of Blaine with on half twisted over Blaine's, his arm draped over Blaine and his tucked in the crook of Blaine's neck. He smiled rubbing his thumb over Kurt's back. Kurt had come such a long way; the doctors were shocked at Kurt's recovery, but Blaine knew Kurt was strong and was a fighter. The doctor had announced a week or two ago Kurt's vocal chords were healed and that it was just up to Kurt's voice to make a return, which resulted in Blaine making a couple Little Mermaid jokes and Kurt rolling his eyes even though he did giggle a little bit.

He felt Kurt begin to stir awake, fidgeting to get comfortable, fighting to stay asleep. "Hey, no, time to wake up," Blaine laughed, "My arm is asleep and tingling." He could feel Kurt smile before pulling away from Blaine, only shifting so he was not lying on Blaine's arm. "Sweetie, you know, if you want me to cuddle with you at night it would be much easier if you just woke me up and asked me to come back to bed with you, rather than trying to squeeze both your long legs and my big ass on this sofa." Kurt rolled his eyes as Blaine leaned in to give him an innocent kiss. "Hmm, Good morning," Blaine hummed before forcing himself and Kurt to get up to begin their morning routine.

Midway through the morning Blaine noticed Kurt was a little off, kind of distant and spacy this morning. Rather than helping Blaine with breakfast, or watch Blaine cook breakfast, he sat on the sofa in the living room, looking at the empty corner where Blaine cleared space for their Christmas tree to go. "Hey, Kurt, I was thinking today we could go pick out a tree and start decorating the apartment. What do you think?" he asked trying to get a reaction, maybe get Kurt excited and happy for the day's events. He closely watched Kurt stare into the empty corner of the living room, holding a once hot but now cold cup of coffee. "Kurt?" Blaine slowly walked over to Kurt kneeling down next to where he was sitting, "sweetheart what's wrong?" Blaine asked softly as he carefully took the mug from Kurt's hands replacing it with his hands trying to get Kurt to look him in the eyes silently hoping Kurt wouldn't be having an episode today that he wouldn't get angry or forget something. Kurt finally turned his head sharply to Blaine with a scared look and tears pooling in his eyes. Blaine's heart began to race a little in fear Kurt was having once of his episodes; "Kurt … do you know where you are?" nod, "do you remember what happened?" nod, "what time it is?" nod, "Okay, good, that's good. Does something hurt? Is your head bothering you?" Kurt shook his head no, tears finally leaking through. "Okay, okay. Breathe it's okay, it's all okay now. You're here and I'm here and everything is okay," Blaine soothed as he held Kurt gently but firmly trying to calm him down not wanting Kurt to get so upset.

Kurt took in a shaking breath as he pulled away reaching for the notepad and pen, his handwriting was no where near as neat as it used to be, which also upset Kurt. Blaine sat patiently rubbing his thumb reassuringly over Kurt's shoulder as Kurt slowly began to write. After he was done he passed the notepad over to Blaine who squeezed his hand reassuring him before reading.

Do you miss my voice?

Blaine looked confused. He read the five words at least five times. "Oh, sweetheart. Of course I miss your voice. I loved your voice it was beautiful, but I do- I'm sorry but I don't understand. Are you asking because I never- … because I-" Kurt started shaking his head harder, more tears spilling out. "Okay, okay, Kurt?" Moments like these scared Blaine, moments were Blaine didn't understand or was confused and Kurt was upset or hurt but couldn't properly express or say what was wrong. To Blaine it was a silly question and the answer was simple; of course he missed Kurt's voice. He loved Kurt's beautiful voice but Blaine didn't like to dwell on things like that, things he couldn't fix. Kurt again pulled away still shaking his head but grabbing the notepad back and continued writing.

I remember the fight we had. You said my voice was annoying and girly.

With a shanking hand Kurt gave Blaine the notepad. Blaine felt his heart push into his throat, tears welling up in his eyes. His heart broke a little when he read it. He looked up seeing Kurt staring down at the floor. "Kurt," he started, "Kurt please look at me." Blaine could hear the wet tearful begging in his voice. Kurt looked up at Blaine, tears still falling from his eyes. "Kurt … what I said that night. That was not true and it was not okay for me to say those things. I definitely don't deserve your love for saying those things that I didn't mean. I love your voice. Your voice is … was-is beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful. I loved everything about you then and I love everything about you now, yes I even love the things that I say annoy me like how you wear socks to bed but end up kicking them off during the night so I find at least three or four pairs of socks when I change the sheets." Blaine smiled at Kurt's silent chuckle causing his eyes to slightly squish in the corners; "My point is that I loved your voice, and it may have been my favorite sound I have ever heard, but it doesn't mean I love you less now or I loved you less then. And there doesn't go a day without me regretting fighting with you … because … because," Blaine swallowed hard trying to keep the heavy fat tears from falling, "If I didn't fight with you or say those untrue hurtful words none of those awful things would have happened to you and if I never said those things you would be my fiancé and you would be happily planning our wedding but I'm a stupid jerk who was having a bad day and decided to take it out on the one person I love most." Blaine openly sobbed now after a long lost fight to keep his tears from falling, "It's all my fault Kurt, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

Kurt at first watched in shock, eyes wide at the answer. He slowly took a few deep breaths before hugging and clinging to Blaine feeling his wild heart threatening to beat out of his chest wondering if Blaine could feel it as Blaine clung tightly to him still crying out his apologies. Kurt took one final deep breath before tilting his head closer to Blaine's ear, "Blaine … I love you" he whispered softly, unsure of how his voice sounded. Blaine froze slowly only pulling far enough to be able to look at Kurt.

"Kurt?" Blaine gasped out, "Did you just-? How-? When-? Wha-?"

Kurt licked his lips taking another deep breath keeps his eyes on Blaine's, "Marry me?"