Warning: Character's death

Rated: T

Note: I haven't write for three years,so starting off to say sorry about my english, it was painful to see this fic unfinished so after these years I had to finish it. I will never write a character's death again, Im crying my eyes out!

Walls all bathed in white, silence, a sooth silence and a fresh flowery scent. Hisagi breathed deep opening slowly his eyes, almost instantly he knew where he was. The fourth division. Damn he had slept a bunch of hours again, his body was mildly fine but the damage inside his soul was definitely significant. As he heard two days ago when he woke up for the first time, Kira had found the two completely without senses following their reiatsu and it was him who brought them here.

Right beside him, on the other bed Renji was still unconscious, although he was strong his body was severely damaged.

"He still hasn't woken up" A voice came from his left and Hisagi turned slowly his head to see who it was.

"Kira?" he blinked slowly.

"He hasn't woken up once, he lost too much blood, his reiatsu is very weak and apparently the soul particules are taking a long time to adjust.."

Hisagi frowned not muttering a word, it was his fault..well Renji would hate that he would think like that but how could he not? He didn't wanted to think like that either but the circumstances had led to this. He turned his head to the right and stared at Renji for several minutes just watching him. Long red hair down his neck and chest which was completely bandaged, so was his neck with still red marks on it. His chest slowly going up and down with the weak breathing. He just looked like he was sleeping peacefully although the truth was much more darker, why wasn't he healing?.

Kira stood up from the stool beside Hisagi's side and sighed while going besides Renji's bed and sit close to his feet.

"No one knows why he keeps bleeding, no one knows why spiritual energy is still coming out..Unohana-taichou is personally taking care of him and she found nothing so far." Kira frowned and placed his hand on the other foot, his thumb caressing it a bit.

Hisagi felt sick, numb, not only the previous events had drained him completely internally this wasn't suppose to happen not at all, it was suppose to be the opposite, nothing made any sense, confusion and chaos filled his head and soul, his eyes watered. His body was still numb too,he could barely move, only his head, his eyes not leaving Renji for a second.

"Stop Hisagi-san.." Kira said smoothly.

"What?" Shuuhei was able to mutter trying to hide his weak voice in a silent sob.

"Blaming." Kira looked at him now and shifted to the other bed. "Abarai-san would do every single thing again and its not because its you Hisagi-san he would never let any friend get hurt not since the episode with Rukia, you know that". He nodded.

Hisagi nodded too "I know but.." he swallowed a sob, "That.." he glanced a couple of times between Kira and Renji stopping on the blond for now, "..doesn't make any sense. Kazeshini and I entered in sync, his wounds weren't fatal, goddamn he is a taichou level." the brunette eyes were red , completely wet but not letting a single tear escaping, his eyebrows heavily frowned and his voice weak and hoarse and obviously angered and sad, a total mix of feelings he even couldn't understand.

Footsteps were heard entering the room. Hanatarou walked in with head low nodding to the others "Hisagi-san good morning, I'm glad you woken up" he nodded again but his face showed a numb and fake smile, the care taker left food and water close to Hisagi's bed "You need to rest plenty , orders from Unohana-taichou" he tried to smile again. Hisagi just looked at him and at the plate and food, the room, the movements, everything was in slow motion, he couldn't had any reaction but suddenlyhe felt something, more like something was missing, he managed to grab Kira's arm making the other look at him, "Hisagi-san?". Shuuhei eyes were wandering, his orbs were trying to reach something, what he was looking for was something inside him, a soul that wasn't there anymore.

"Kazeshini isn't here." he widen his eyes to Kira which stood up and got himself in the field of Shuuhei's vision, he glanced over the other waist to Renji while another person entered the room but the brunette looked up at Kira when he answered him "You are very weak , must be that" he grabbed the glass of water trying to convince Shuuhei to drink a bit, he heard a light noise on the other bed cracking a bit and raise his head trying to see what was going on, the blond noticed and sighed, "Rikichi helps Hanatarou changing the bandages, it wasn't suppose to be him but you know how devoted he is to his senpai.." he looked over his shoulder frowning a bit, "And his bandages get crimson red painfully quick" he turned his head again to Hisagi "I suggest you not to see it..", the older fukutaichou managed to pull away Kira's hand with the glass and looked him in the eye.

"Damn fucking right I will see!" It wasn't suppose for his body to move but he felt every inch of him trembling, what were they hiding? He knew, Renji was bleeding so obviously his body was in bad condition, if it wasn't healing that's natural, what were they trying to hide exactly.

It was only when Kira moved from his eyesight that every single drop of blood was out of Shuuhei's body, all the pain he felt was gone, all the thoughts, all air was out of his lungs, life stopped. That image would be forever carved inside his mind.

Almost every badage was taken, no, not bandages, red straps of cloth, nothing of white they had, all of them carefully taken by Hanatarou, gently unwrapping them while Rikichi helped moving also carefully and almost tenderly Renji's body as if it was made of glass. Indeed the wounds were still bleeding and the sheet was already turning red.

Hanatarou finished removing the bandages, slowly he started washing the muscled and tanned body with care, he cleaned the wounds extremely softly but as soon as he cleaned the blood, more blood was coming out. Awkward was, he bled slowly, very slowly as if something was killing him from the inside. Done with the cleaning the tow young boys carefully steady Renji's body and they started to groom and taking care of his gorgeous long hair.

Renji lied horribly peacefully, there were cuts everywhere which haven't closed one inch, some were small and only on the layer, some were big and deep, the flesh was still fresh and the smell of blood filled the entire room. Hisagi was petrified looking at him, he couldn't talk, he couldn't cry, he couldn't anything, it was just too terrifying. The wound on his neck was still open too, there were bruises everywhere, three days had passed, the fact that Renj was still in that state was horrid for him but there was something even more horrific going on on his body and that was what started to panic the brunette.

"K-Kira...?" he was finally able to say. The blond kept quiet because he knew what Hisagi was referring to. Actually it was what puzzled everybody, it was the sign that Renji was definitely dying, it was the reason Unohana couldn't do anything and the most believed theory because what was happening was the actual source of Renji's decaying.

"Kira for fucks sake what is that?" The panic rose withing Hisagi and he started trembling, the shock was so big it was the first time all his body could move. And after

"Kira, answer me, where are they?" he began to sound desperate. He couldn't understand anything.

Rikichi and Hanatarou looked at Kira and he looked at them back, he was not sure if the other would take the truth but hiding from him and him knowing later wouldn't do any better either.

With sadness the blond looked at Renji and then at Hisagi and after brief moments he talked slowly not even wanting to believe his own words too.

"Zabimaru is gone." he paused and gulped with no sound like he had a knot in his throat, "There's no trace of its spirit, his zanpakutou broke after twelve hours of being here that's why...his marks, his tattos are gone" he breathed deep to contain his tears too.

Hisagi was didn't took away his eyes from Renji while Kira was talking, he just remembered every inch of the gorgeous black marks that covered the redhead body and there was nothing left, nothing.

"But..Kira I don't feel Kazeshini, it's not with me and I'm not dying, you know damn well we can live without any power, any zanpakutou, we cease as shinigami but we continue to live in soul society..I do not understand!" he grabbed gain Kia's arm "What the hell is wrong with him...".

The blond bit his lower lip because now was the part that would hurt, "Unohana-taichou believes..i mean the only explanation.." he breathed deep again.."He woken up once." The brunette eyes opened wide and he was about to talk but Kira interrupted him "The body, not his soul, Kazeshini spoke and moved instead of him." Kira lowered his head.

"It..it can't be.." tears ran down Hisagi's face as he was almost knowing what the other was about to say.

"Kazeshini," Kira continued painfully. "..possessed him, we don't know how, maybe it was when you were both unconscious, its a theory.." he started to sob.."We don't know for sure but the most probable answer is.." he managed between sobs and tears while Hisagi was cracking to the bottom of his darkness just by his side, "He was possessed, Zabimaru was eliminated..and his soul too he has no soul Hisagi-san, only his body is here, nothing else here" and Kira placed his hand on his mouth to not talk anymore, for it hurt him too and sobbed silently.

Hisagi shook his head while crying "No..no no no no no, I don't accept it" he continued crying "I WON'T" he shoved the plate with food and the glass shatering on the closest wall. He breathe deep while crying, his lungs getting out of air, it was like he was drawing, just drawing in a sea of pain and despair.

Rikichi and Hanatarou cried silently too now wrapping new and white bandages around Renji's body, when they finished, they couldn't be inside the room anymore it was too painfully for them so they left quietly.

"It's matter of minutes or hours Hisagi-san.." he caressed the other shoulder for showing some kind of support but the blond didn't knew what to do, he himself was totally broken from all that.

"He's in an induced coma, you understand..we couldn't let Kazeshini speak for him, move for him..it is enough killing him from the inside out" he nodded holding a scream of pain inside, he had to be strong for his senpai. "I'll be leaving the both of you alone, sure you want to say some last words to him, no matter where he is..he will listen to you". He had to go now before he broke right in front of Hisagi but he will be close, just behind the door for any eventual thing to happen.

Hisagi could only cry for minutes, nothing made sense, it was a lie, it was a nightmare..at some point he started scratching his arms painfully to wake up..to his despair he felt every little scratch. It was happening. Guilt, pain, sadness, despair, numbness, insanity, death..suddenly he was powerless to this huge and heavy ball of the most horrible feelings someone could ever feel, he couldn't fight them, he just let them in while looking at Renji.

Touch him, he needed to touch him now, right now, this sudden urge was like punch on the back of his head and rolled out of the bed, still with no strenght to walk so he fell, he crawled, put his two arms on the other bed and pulled himself up with his red shot eyes and deep breaths, he looked all over the other body and with one hand touched his face...still warm. He got his face closer to the others and his cheek close to the other lips..he could barely feel the air coming out.

He looked at his beautiful face and gripped the other shoulder shaking him just slightly "Don't leave me renji, not now you idiot, we are finally together..wake the fuck up" he screamed desperately knowing he wouldn't but pain and despair were speaking much louder than reason.

"Don't leave goddamnit...fucking stay..I don't care if we aren't shinigami.." he said while crying like he never did before, between loud sobs, "We can live in any district just don't fucking leave me.." he leaned his head on the other shoulder while still crying, his face fitting the other neck.

"I love you.." he said between sobs, slowly in a low tone.

Suddenly his eyes shot up as he sensed and listening to a more deep breath and he got silent. Another deep breath in, Hisagi was petrified, his body froze and he started trembling.

Finally the breath was out with a subtle sound "Shuu...", Now it was the time for his head to shot up and with widen big red eyes the older man looked for any sign of life but even Renji's eyes were closed..but he heard it..it was definitely-, another deep breath in, the brunette was still like a statue in silent with no reactiong, not knowing what was going on but a little ray of hope was touching his heart which was beating like a drum almost wanting to throwout of his mouth.

"...hei."

Hisagi was about to scream for Renji but he didn't as he watched the chest going empty slowly which looked like the last breath to never go up again. He waited. In silence. The chest didn't moved for a couple of minutes and would never will again.

He gripped the other shoulders and carved his nails on the already bruised skin and screamed. A scream heard in all Seireitei, an almost inhuman sound that only sadness could provoke. A long painful call of despair from his very inside. He screamed until he ran out of air and his voice started to fail, no tears just a terrifying sound of lost.