AN: This is just a little story I had pop into my head. I am getting kinda tired of harems, so I figured I would give this a shot. I mean, harems are kinda hard to write, and I'm just lazy. So without further ado I give to you, my story! Oh and, everyone looks as they usually do. Ja Ne! Oh and…

WAFFLE BURGER!

I will be using a combination of suffixes and other such things in the story, so don't be scared if you see a chan or sama in there along with kaa and tou as parents. Takes place before canon by like, a week. Natsu will bring Lucy back to the guild by himself. No Naruto going with her.

(Chapter 1)

Thunder rumbled as the members of Fairy Tail sat at their usual spots, but no one could manage a smile. All they could do was wait. Wait. A simple thing, but it carried so much hope and dread with it. How could they have known that such a simple S-Rank mission would turn out like this? Markarov looked at his children, worry evident on his face. He stopped at one in particular as she sat with Erza and Cana, who were giving her some form of comfort. Mirajane had started to cry uncontrollably for the past few hours, her only comfort was the growing bulge that was her belly.

Markarov sighed as he checked his viewing lacrima. He had given the other to Gildarts so that he could contact him when they were in Magnolia Town. He grimaced as he downed the last of his beer. It was all he could do. All anyone could do. He had no idea what Naruto Namikaze would face.

The mission hadn't been mislabeled. It had been given to him by the Mage council, a request for the man he sent. But it turned out to be an attempted assassination. A trick to get him killed. To stop him from living and teaching his magic to others. But, as far as he knew, it had failed. The man was still alive and well, the last massage he got from Gildarts said that he was safe and sound, if beaten badly. A sudden light from the lacrima got his, and everyone's, attention.

He picked it up, filled with hope, as he answered. "Gildarts, are you here?"

The answer came back. "Yes. We're in the hospital. Naruto is being treated for extreme damage to his body, his entire first layer of skin had been peeled off when he went version two. He will be right as rain in the morning."

Mira jumped to her feet, making her way as fast as she could out of the guild. Her pink dress quickly got soaked in the downpour as she made her way to the hospital, all of the guild following her. They arrived, and saw that Mira was arguing with the nurse.

'You have to let me see him! I'm some of his only family!" Mira reasoned.

"I'm sorry, but he doesn't need visitors right-"" excuse me, but I believe that, as guildmaster, I have the right to see my children." Markarov cut in. The nurse reluctantly nodded as she led the group of Mirajane, Markarov, Grey, Erza, and Cana to Naruto's room. When they entered, they saw him wrapped in bandages, the only thing making him out to be himself is his signature pitch black, spiked hair. He still had on his purple pants and black boots. His white haori with flames on the bottom hung off the chair and his fighting staff leaning against the wall.

Mira was immediately by his side, his bandaged hand in her grasp. Granted, he wore bandages all over his body normally, but now he was actually hurt. Markarov was quietly talking with the doctor as the group all stood next to Naruto. Mirajane spoke first. "Naruto, you idiot. I told you to come home fine, but you go and get hurt. When you wake up, I'm going to take you to Porlyuscia so that she can beat some sense into her grandson."

After she was done, Grey came up. "Hey, Big Bro, hope you get better soon. The guild is way too quiet without your laughter and all the jokes and pranks you pull."

Erza was next. "Naruto, you stupid fool. Why do you always get put into situations like this? Sigh, when Mira gets done with you, be prepared to take your punishment from me."

Cana was the next one. "You need to get better fast, Naruto. Too many people are counting on you. And besides, Mira needs you to help take care of the baby."

A dry chuckle rang through the room s the bandages form shifted, and Naruto's deep grey eyes opened. "Well, with friends like this, how can I just lay in this bed? This time tomorrow, I'll be up and about, laughing and eating ramen."

Mira was by his side. "Naruto, you need to rest. You were hurt pretty badly. The version two form of your magic is still dangerous."

Naruto just gave a booming laugh at that. His laughter seemed to lift the spirits of the Fairy Tail mages in the room. "Mira, don't worry. I made a promise to always be with you. I have no intention of dying just yet. Besides, knowing Granny she'd just find a way to bring me back and make me do chores again."

He sat up, not caring or noticing the pain he was in, as he looked around. Grey understood what he was looking for and said. "Uh, Big Bro, your hat kind of got, incinerated."

Naruto stared at his surrogate little brother before he shouted. "NOOOOO!"

Cana laughed as she brought out a purple beanie with a swirling leaf on the forehead before tossing it to him. At his starry eyes, she said. "I remember that you hate having your hair uncovered, just like the rest of your body, and decided to bring your hat."

Naruto gave a grateful nod, absently rubbing his chest. Everyone knew why he wore the bandages, but only Grey, Mira, Cana, and Markarov had actually seen his full body scars. He had gotten them from his dragon parent, none of them knowing who that parent was. All they knew was he had been cruel when training Naruto. Markarov and Mira knew, but they were tight lipped about it.

Grey rubbed the back of his head as he said. "Hey, Naruto, I have a question."

"And I may have an answer." Was his reply.

Continuing, Grey said. "Well, do you think that maybe, after we leave, I could sleep over at your place? Just for a little while?"

Naruto looked at Grey and said. "Fangirls breaking into your apartment?" At Grey's nod, he said. "Yes. Never be afraid to ask for help from fan girls. They have no souls and can destroy property faster than Natsu and the rest of Fairy Tail."

Markarov gave off a boisterous laugh as he nodded in agreement. "Oi, I can drink to that!"

Naruto laughed as he finished getting ready, his haori hanging off his shoulder loosely and his hat covering is hair, save for the parts that fell around his head and down his neck. He had re-bandaged his body while in the bathroom, not wanting his many scars to be seen. They walked along the streets of Magnolia Town, Naruto leaning heavily on his staff. Mira's arm was looped through his as they walked.

When they got to Fairy Tail, Natsu was standing waiting for them. He grinned at Naruto and charged, his fist covered in flames. "Fight me Naruto!"

Mira's fist soon met his face as he was blasted back, opening the guild doors as violently as possible. Naruto whooped at the destruction as he kissed Mirajane on the cheek through his bandages as he yeeld as loud as he could. 'THAT'S MY GIRL!"

Every guild member looked up and cheered when they saw their bandaged friend well. All of them had been worried sick, praying for him to be alright after the hellish fight he had been in. But they were nervous. Naruto had come back only minutes after another one of their S-Class mages and his followers did.

Laxus looked at the man who was second only to his grandfather, anger and disgust on his face. He hated The Namikaze. Hated how he was so strong, how he had such a hot girl. He hated how she had become pregnant with the bandaged mans child, wishing it was HE who had done it first. He sneered and turned back to his Thunder God Tribe.

Naruto sat at the bar, sighing in relief as he did. His leg was still hurting him from where the giant fucking sand rat had nearly crushed it. Granted, he had used one of his three lost magics to obliterate the things arm, it still was a very rude gesture. He leaned back as he relaxed. The fight had been hard, but he had won. He had beaten Shukaku of the sand.

While he never understood his recent popularity amongst the people of Fiore, he did know that due to his moniker as 'The Null Man' and the 'Bijuu Killer.' Cana had told him, while walking to the guild, that the Weekly Sorcerer had already asked for an interview with him and Mirajane over their child. He was hesitant, having never really gotten used to the attention he was getting. If Tou-Sama found out, he would kill him.

He still couldn't believe that Mira-Chan had agreed to a photo shoot with her in a nursery. He had just stared at the picture, seeing he read to her already showing stomach as she was four months in, two months ago, and it just looked…perfect… to him. The way she had that serene smile on her face, the look she had in her eyes as she read to their unborn child just made him warm inside.

Looking up when a bowl of miso ramen was placed in front of him, Naruto saw the smiling face of the woman he loved. "Eat up. Tomorrow, as punishment for making me worry so much, you will be doing an interview with the Weekly Sorcerer reporter. But for now, welcome home."

She leaned forward and pulled his bandages down just enough so she could kiss him. As they locked lips, Naruto was reminded as to why he loved her. At first, she had treated him like dirt, even though he was on her team and had saved her life many times. It was only after Lisanna had died and he had been hospitalized for using his Dust Magic in a dangerous situation that she had come to him. They had looked at each other before Naruto asked her why she was here.

She didn't answer, preferring to just sit by him and hold his hand. She had asked after a few days of talking to show her what he looked like under his bandages. When he did, she had cried for him. His scars were horrible. His arm looked like it had been cut off and reattached while his chest looked like it had been torn open and sealed up by an amateur sewer.

After, they had spent more time with each other, coming to know each other. Pretty soon, Mira had changed into the kind and friendly girl she was today and had admitted her feelings to Naruto. They had been going out for a year and a half when she had gotten pregnant.

After the kiss, Naruto pulled his bandages back onto his face, his eyes crinkling into a smile. "Well, Well Mira-Chan, if I didn't know any better would say that you have seduced me with your shear amazingness."

Mira smiled as she hit him playfully on the chest. "Well, I would be lying if is said that you're pretty amazing yourself, in more ways than one." Naruto smirked at that. He was proud of his manhood. He would never show it to anyone other than his Mira-Chan of course, but he knew that he was gifted in his physical aspects of their relationship.

At that moment, three things happened: The first, Natsu tried to attack Naruto from behind, failing miserably. The second was Natsu's foot connecting with Naruto's ramen. And the third was said ramen that fell and broke on the ground.

Everyone froze as Naruto stared at his bowl of ramen, a look of absolute horror on his face. He fell to his knees as he tried to cup the ramen through his bandaged fingers. "No, no, no, no. Why, why you? Why? For what purpose was there for your death?"

He openly sobbed as Mirajane patted his back consolingly. She knew his love of ramen. Having seen him devour more ramen than Natsu any kind of food made her wonder how he was able to keep such a lean and muscular appearance, despite the fact that he towered over her petite frame of 5'10" with his large 6'3".

Naruto fell into the fetal position as he rocked back and forth. Markarov knew what would happen next and restrained Naruto as the man leapt at Natsu, rage in his eyes. Markarov grunted as the man struggled to kill the pink haired Dragon Slayer. Said Dragon slayer was hiding behind a table, trying to get the other enraged Dragon Slayer to calm down. "Naruto, I am so sorry! As a punishment for my actions, I wil willingly go on any mission you get for me."

Natsu missed the now evil glint in the eyes of Naruto. Said man stood up calmly and made his way over to the board. Oh, he knew what mission he would send Natsu on. He picked it up and brought it to Markarov, who read it and looked at Natsu with pity in his aged eyes. "Natsu, he had chosen. You have the… seven day Tora the cat mission."

Natsu went white as a sheet when he heard that. Tora was a legend amongst Fairy Tail. He was a cat who was rumored to have beaten both Gildarts and Markarov. The mission came in every few weeks, and the mage who did it had to be incredibly powerful to capture the demon cat in the seven days allowed. So far, only Naruto ha completed it in one day. Even Laxus was hesitant to take the mission.

As the pinkette ran to pack with Happy, the doors to the guild were thrown open and an irate pink haired elderly woman walked in. She was Porlyuscia, Naruto's grandmother and healing expert of Fairy Tail. She looked directly at Naruto as he bowed to the floor, his forehead touching the wooden floor as she said. "Naruto, for your actions these last few days, you will be doing chores that your Tou-Sama would find problematic to complete." And with that, she pointed to the door as Naruto scrambled out.

Just another day in Fairy tail.

AN: New story. And check out the updates for my other fics. Peace to the Middle East! And Zimbabwe.