Author's note: To my dear readers who are still around, I am sorry for making you wait this long for an update. But I thank you for all the times you commented and asked me about it, it means the world to me. There is only the Epilogue left, which I am already working on, so I promise you this time, the next update will be soon. I hope you enjoy it! :)

It all started with cuddling… with Sebastian laying on his side and Kurt spooning him from behind. Sebastian was sure he'd fallen asleep at some point, and that Kurt had done so too, but after a while, they'd both had woken up and well… There was only so much time they could stay together embraced in bed before they started kissing again.

Kurt was actually the one who had started it this time. He must have woken up first, and after a while of just laying in bed, he came up from behind and placed a small kiss on the side of Sebastian's neck. It was just a small press of the lips at first but it was enough to send shivers through Sebastian's spine and make him arch back against Kurt, giving him more access to his neck.

That's when things started to escalate into more dangerous territory.

Kurt locked his arms around Sebastian's chest and started mouthing at his neck, swiping his lips and tongue up and down the sensitive skin until Sebastian was gasping and moaning. He could feel every swipe of Kurt's lips and tongue as if it was all over his body, even though Kurt was only kissing his neck. He felt electricity and goosebumps ripple across his skin, and it was intoxicating.

"Ahhh... What happened to just sleeping?" Sebastian asked breathlessly, remembering how Kurt had said they would just sleep when they first got into bed together.

"We did sleep." Kurt said between wet kisses, now reaching for Sebastian's earlobe. "You passed out for about two hours, in case you didn't realize..."

Okay then. Sebastian didn't really know for how long they'd been sleeping, but he didn't mind in the slightest. All Sebastian wanted to do was kiss Kurt, and it was a good thing that Kurt seemed to want exactly the same.

Kurt's arms felt warm against Sebastian's chest as he held him close. His hands ran up and down Sebastian's torso, making him feel sparks of pleasure running all over his body with every swipe of Kurt's mouth and tongue on his skin. Sebastian arched his back again just as Kurt's hands crept under the fabric of his t-shirt. Sebastian turned around, unable to continue this position and searching for Kurt's mouth, immediately covering it with his own and kissing him hard.

They were both laying on their sides now, kissing while their hands roamed over the other's bodies. Sebastian cradled Kurt's face and neck, pulling him closer as they kissed while Kurt snuck his hands under Sebastian's shirt again, caressing his waist and chest and pulling him closer and closer until they were completely pressed together.

They'd kissed before, but never like this. It was different this time. There was an unspoken need and desperation in each touch and kiss. They were kissing like it was the last time they'd get the chance to. Sebastian was completely lost in the sensations, and even though he wanted more, Sebastian couldn't help but wonder if his sister or mother would come into the room and catch them. Kurt didn't seem to be worried about that in the slightest as he sat up and pushed Sebastian back onto the mattress.

Sebastian wanted to ask him what he was thinking, but before he could even form any words, Kurt was leaning down and kissing along the bob of Sebastian's throat. Kurt's hands started reaching under the fabric of his hoodie and pulling it up all the way until it was rolled against Sebastian's chest, right under his armpits.

"Off." Kurt demanded, and Sebastian could do nothing more than to oblige, stretching his arms above his head so Kurt could pull the hoodie right off along with his tshirt.

And within seconds Kurt was back on top of Sebastian, kissing him and touching him along his bare chest. His mouth trailing down from Sebastian's mouth to his jawline and then down his neck towards his chest, kissing every inch of exposed skin available until he found one of Sebastian's nipples and sucked on it tentatively, swiping at it with his tongue.

"Ahhh." Sebastian groaned, his hands reaching down to grab Kurt's waist and then sliding down until he was squeezing his ass. The act made Kurt gasp out loud and look up from where he was sucking on Sebastian's nipples, going up to meet Sebastian's lips with his own once again. Sebastian turned them over, pinning Kurt to the mattress and thrusting his hips down, creating a frustrating yet delicious friction between their crotches. Even through the fabric of his pants Sebastian could feel Kurt was already hard.

In that moment, all of Sebastian's worries about being caught flew out the window. It didn't take long for the rest of their clothes to come off. It all happened in a rushed haze of hot touches and wet kisses that left them panting until they were both wearing nothing more than their underwear. They were kissing hungrily and aggressively, desperate with need.

Kurt seemed so unlike himself, eyes wild as he pushed Sebastian back again so he could straddle him, a devilish smile plastered across his face. Sebastian was breathing heavily, feeling his heart beat hard against his chest as Kurt moved sinfully against him, his pale chest flushed from the heat and exertion.

Sebastian couldn't take this anymore, he was sure he was going to come in his boxers just from the friction, and he still wanted to do so much more. He snuck his hands under Kurt's briefs, massaging his ass and getting small grunts and moans out of him every time he dug his fingers into the soft flesh. Then in a swift move, he pulled Kurt back down, kissing him hard and rolling them over so he was on top of him again.

"So bossy." Sebastian whispered against Kurt's ear, teasing his earlobe with his tongue just a bit to make Kurt squirm.

"Yeah… What are you gonna do about it?"

"Hmm… I'm gonna fuck you?" Sebastian questioned, almost shyly and still unsure about the new pace of what he was doing with Kurt until Kurt nodded with a relieved sigh.

Sebastian pulled down Kurt's briefs just enough so he could grab his cock and pumped it slowly as he kissed along Kurt's neck and collarbone. Kurt drew his knees up as Sebastian settled between his legs, and then wrapped them around Sebastian's middle.

Sebastian propped himself up on his elbow, searching for Kurt's face, eager to look into his eyes as he jerked him off but then it happened… The disgusting taste of copper hit the back of Sebastian's throat, making him cough and when he looked down, Kurt's eyes were opened wide and panicked, his mouth opened in horror as his face and neck were stained red with blood. Blood that was dripping down from Sebastian's nose and mouth.

"Oh my god… Sebastian!" Kurt screamed, rubbing at his face and pushing him off, but Sebastian was frozen on the spot. He couldn't think, he couldn't move, he couldn't breathe. He could just feel the blood dripping out of his nose and mouth, going down his neck and chest, pouring over Kurt and drenching the bedsheets.

"Fuck… Fuck!"

...Fuck...

When Sebastian opened his eyes, he was alone in the bed, still fully clothed and wrapped in a blanket. His heart was beating impossibly fast, and there was a weird buzz in his ears.

It wasn't real. It was just a dream. It was a fucking nightmare!

Sebastian tightened his fist around the blanket and closed his eyes again for a second, taking a deep breath and trying to calm himself down. But then the feeling of moisture in his pillow and the taste of blood on the back of his throat made him bolt up. He sat up so fast that his head spinned. He touched his face and realized his nose was bleeding, albeit nowhere as much as it was in his dream.

"Shit."

Sebastian grabbed some tissues from the nightstand to wipe his nose and walked to the bathroom to see how bad it was. He turned on the light and winced as he saw his reflection in the mirror. He looked like hell, and he realized the nosebleed must have happened while he was sleeping because his hoodie was stained and there was blood that was starting to dry under his nose, near his lips and chin. There were only a few drops, but it still grossed him out. Sebastian wiped his face and discarded the bloody tissues before turning on the faucet and washing his face with cold water. As he looked at himself in the mirror, he could hear the faint sounds of voices coming from the livingroom.

He opened the bedroom door quietly and stood by the frame, listening to Kurt and Catherine as they spoke.

"I bet it's going to be amazing."

"Yeah, but I'm kind of nervous, you know?"

"You have nothing to be nervous about, Kurt. I bet you're going to do great at school."

"How about you? When are you heading back to New York?"

There was a small moment of silence and Sebastian couldn't help but wonder what was going through his sister's mind.

"I don't know. I guess I'll just wait until after Sebastian's graduation, that way we can fly in together."

"Wait... Does that mean Sebastian going to Columbia with you?"

"Yeah… Don't look so surprised Kurt, of course he is."

"Really? He hasn't mentioned anything about that.."

Kurt sounded skeptical, but then Catherine continued.

"I know he hasn't. It's because he doesn't know yet…"

"What do you mean?"

"Sebastian doesn't know he got accepted. Our parents have the letters but with everything going on, you know … Mom and Dad are really excited, but they haven't really touched the subject with him cause Bastian's got too many things on his mind right now. We just want him to focus on getting better right now... But he is definitely coming with me, I have no doubts about that."

There was another pause, and Sebastian was expecting Kurt to say something, but he didn't. It was Catherine who talked again.

"The semester won't start until August anyway so we have time. It will be just like we'd always planned it."

More silence.

"Besides, I'd kick his butt if he didn't come with me."

Sebastian bit his lip as he heard the cheerful tone in his sister's voice. His mind was reeling with the information he'd just learned. He got into Columbia? His parents had been keeping that from him and Sebastian didn't really know how to feel about it. Should he be upset? Should he feel relieved?

Catherine was so sure about him going with her to New York and moving into their apartment like they'd been talking about since they were little. But Sebastian wasn't sure about anything anymore. He slowly backed away and closed the door, leaning against it and hoping his sister and Kurt hadn't noticed him eavesdropping on their conversation.

Maybe he just should go back to bed. Sebastian didn't know exactly how long he'd been asleep for but a glance at the window told him it was already pretty late into the night. His body still felt heavy with sleep though and he considered going back to bed to get some more rest. He walked over and sat on the edge of the bed and sighed, remembering how Kurt had cuddled up behind him and spooned him until he'd fallen asleep.

Sebastian didn't know how to feel about waking up to an empty bed. He was relieved for one part, but he also couldn't help but feel slightly disappointed. He'd been having one hell of a sex dream. And it had felt so vivid that just thinking about it made his head spin a little bit. Having that dream made Sebastian wonder about so many things though… He couldn't help but think about how it would actually feel like to be with Kurt like that. Would he ever get the chance?

What exactly was Sebastian doing with Kurt anyway?

This thing he and Kurt had going on was just weird. There was a playfulness and warmth to it that was strange and unfamiliar for Sebastian, but it was nice at the same time. Sebastian sure as hell needed nice things right now. He didn't want to think much about the future, he just wanted to live one day at a time.

He laid down on the bed and sighed, thinking about Kurt and Catherine's conversation. All this thinking about school and tests and college was getting him down in a really bad way, but he didn't want them to know. He didn't even know about the acceptance letter from Columbia, his parents hadn't told him yet. He appreciated them not putting any more pressure on him, but at the same time he felt betrayed. They were always only talking about him finishing at Dalton, college didn't seem to be something they would allow themselves to hope for. Did they think he couldn't handle it? He couldn't help but feel like he was being "babied", and that pissed him off.

Nothing made sense. Sebastian knew he needed to study for his final exams so he could graduate from high school. As annoying as it was, at least studying gave him something to do, a goal and something to look forward to... But at the same time, it was just so exhausting.

And Sebastian was quite frankly sick of feeling exhausted all the time.

He closed his eyes and tried to not think about all those things anymore. Sebastian wanted to sleep but he was hungry. He didn't really feel like going out and joining his sister and Kurt though. He waited and waited, hoping to fall asleep but the pain in his stomach just made it impossible for him to do so.

Suddenly, the bedroom door opened and Kurt walked into the room. There was no use in feigning sleep, not when his stomach was growling so loudly. Kurt sat down on the edge of the bed and put his hand on Sebastian's arm.

"Are you awake, sleepyhead?"

Sebastian just grumbled in reply. Turning around slowly and squinting his eyes at the light coming from the open door.

"How do you feel?"

"I'm alright.."

"It's late. You slept a lot... Aren't you hungry?"

"Not really..." Sebastian lied without really understanding why he did.

"Your mom made veggie lasagna, it's pretty good."

And well, that was an offer Sebastian couldn't resist. So he reluctantly got out of bed and went outside with Kurt. He sat down at the table with him and Catherine. His mother's lasagna smelled delicious, but it still tasted like ash in his mouth. Sebastian made his best effort to eat all of it, and not make any comments about the taste to anyone. Instead, he focused on making small talk with his sister and Kurt while they ate. Neither one of them brought up the subject of college with Sebastian even once. And Sebastian tried his best not to think about it much, even when his dad came back home and joined them at the table.

Every now and then he'd catch Kurt looking at him suspiciously, like there was something on his mind. He looked like there was something he wanted to tell Sebastian but he never did. Sebastian wondered if it was because of what Catherine had just told him about Columbia. Every time Sebastian looked at Catherine, she was acting normal… no funny looks or awkward glances between her and Kurt, but Sebastian now knew they were hiding something from him. They all were.

For some reason, that irked him a bit, but Sebastian tried his best to focus on getting through dinner just so he could go back to sleep again. He knew Kurt had to go back home the next day, and he wanted things to be as normal as possible. Everything was going well until his mother walked into the room, visibly upset.

"Bastian honey, what's this?"

She was holding Sebastian's pillow and pointing at the bloodstains in it. Sebastian had been careful to discard his bloody tissues but he hadn't even thought of checking the pillow. Damn.

"It was nothing."

"This isn't nothing honey, there's blood on your pillow… Was it your nose again? Are you okay?"

"Mom… It was just a few drops." Sebastian said, trying to shrug it off. But he didn't quite manage to ease his mother's mind, because the truth was that in the dimmed light of the bedroom Sebastian hadn't realized just how much blood there had been and now that his mother was holding the pillow in front of him, it did look quite disgusting.

His mother put the pillow on the table and walked up to him, she took his face in her hands, tilting his chin up and examining him. Sebastian just rolled his eyes as he saw Catherine shake her head, take the pillow off the table and walk away, probably towards the laundry room.

Kurt just stared at him, visibly concerned as well.

"Bastian, you know what the doctor said. We have to let him know if anything happens…"

"Yeah, but nothing happened Mom! It was just a nosebleed."

"It's not just a nosebleed honey, it can be something more… has it happened before? You can't keep these things from us-"

"What but you can keep things from me?" He interrupted his mom. Pulling back from her hands and standing up.

"Honey, what do you-"

"I got into Columbia and you didn't tell me! What else have you been keeping from me?" Sebastian didn't mean to raise his voice as much as he did, but he was upset and couldn't hide it anymore.

Sebastian stared at his mother as she deflated. When he turned to see his dad, he was just looking at the floor and then shaking his head. Kurt's eyes were wide but he remained silent as Catherine walked into the room frowning. "Sebastian what's the matter?"

"What else have you been lying about?" He asked her.

"Lying?" Catherine seemed confused.

"He is talking about Columbia." Her father said. Catherine frowned and looked at Sebastian, probably wondering if he overheard her and Kurt talking.

"How did you find out?"

"Does it even matter?" Sebastian said. "What matters is that you all knew, and you didn't tell me anything."

"You got into Columbia and Cornell." His mother said, with a small smile. Sebastian sighed and shook his head.

"And what about NYU?"

"We haven't heard from them yet."

"Is that true? Or did I get rejected and you just don't wanna tell me? Do you want to spare my fragile little feelings? Is that it?"

"No… She's telling the truth!" Catherine interjected… "Sebastian, don't be like this, Mom and Dad just didn't want to-"

"Didn't want to what, Cath? I don't even understand why you think you need to hide things from me...I don't need you to baby me! So you can stop now, okay?"

The room was suddenly silent, and Sebastian was too annoyed to stand still anymore. He needed to get out of there, so he turned away from his family and walked out the door. He didn't care that he slammed it a little too hard on his way out, and didn't realize he wasn't wearing shoes until he felt the coolness of the grass through his socked feet as he walked outside their apartment building.

There was a wooden swing set in the middle of the small park between the buildings and he headed towards it. It was late and there was no one around, so Sebastian walked over and sat down in one of the swings and stayed there for a few minutes, alone with his thoughts. The weather was warm, like any summer night would be… so Sebastian took off his hoodie and stared as his socked feet as he sat there, thinking about everything and nothing all at once.

He'd been accepted to Columbia and Cornell… And as mad as Sebastian was at his family for keeping it a secret from him, he couldn't help but smile because it was a big deal for him. He'd worked really hard on his college applications and it was good to see it had paid off, even if he had no idea what to do about college yet.

Sebastian was so deep in thought that he didn't notice Kurt walking up to him until he sat down on the other swing beside him.

"You shouldn't just walk outside barefoot you know. You could step in dog poop or something." Kurt said lightheartedly, handing Sebastian a pair of sneakers.

"Did my mother send you?" Sebastian asked, as he put them on.

"Kind of... She is the one who noticed you stormed off with no shoes on. I hadn't even noticed. She worries about you a lot, you know?"

Sebastian rolled his eyes. He really didn't want to say anything but he knew Kurt was right… Part of him supposed it was a little unfair for him to be mad at his parents for wanting to protect him, but another part of him was sick of being treated like he couldn't handle disappointment. He had finally made it out of the hospital after fighting tooth and nail against cancer for crying out loud! He could handle hearing about college.

Kurt and Sebastian sat there for a moment, slowly swinging back and forth in silence. The only sounds audible were the small creaks of the chains holding the swings to the big wooden bar hanging above them.

"Are you mad at your parents?" Kurt asked, but Sebastian shrugged. "Are you mad at me?"

"It depends... Are you hiding something from me too?"

Kurt shook his head and offered Sebastian a small, sympathetic smile. Sebastian knew he couldn't really be mad at Kurt, he hadn't been keeping things from him, only his parents and sister had. But he couldn't help his foul mood… Why was he so upset anyways? Sebastian didn't even understand himself sometimes.

Kurt seemed to understand though, because he just kept him company without asking any other questions. After a while, Sebastian turned around, looked up at the apartment building and saw his sister and mom in the balcony of the seventh floor. They seemed to be talking as they looked down at them.

"Are you ready to go back inside?" Kurt asked, but Sebastian shook his head.

"Nah, I'll just stay here for awhile."

"Then I'll stay with you."

"You don't have to."

"I know… But I want to." Kurt replied, and when Sebastian looked at him, he saw a warmth in his eyes that made him wonder again about what this all meant.

"Why?" Sebastian dared to ask, looking at Kurt expectantly to see what he would say.

"Because I care about you… Even when you behave like a jerk." Kurt said after a little while. "Also, I need to make sure you're in a better mood when you go back upstairs. I promised your sister I'd do my best, considering she wanted to come after you and smack you for talking to your parents like that… And I kind of agree with her." Kurt mumbled, making Sebastian roll his eyes in response.

"So you're on a mission to get me out of my bad mood, is that what this is?"

"Mission impossible... it seems."

"Oh I wouldn't call it impossible." Sebastian said, smirking. "Do you wanna sneak into the playhouse over there and make out? Cause that would definitely cheer me up."

Kurt rolled his eyes and laughed, shaking his head. Sebastian got up from the swing and slowly began walking over to the small playhouse. Kurt hesitated for a second, but after taking a glance over his shoulder and seeing that Catherine and Sebastian's mom weren't on the balcony anymore, he got up and joined him.

…

After the days Kurt spent with the Smythes down in Cleveland, it was time for him to go back home and start making plans for his return to New York. As much as he was stalling, Kurt knew that he couldn't stay in Ohio for much longer, not if he wanted his life in New York to finally take off. Classes in NYADA were going to start soon, and Rachel was also pressuring him to come back, since they needed Kurt to cover his part of the rent for the apartment in Bushwick. Kurt also couldn't wait to go back to his internship in Vogue, because even though Isabelle had been very understanding and accommodating, Kurt feared if he was absent for much longer, he wouldn't have a job there anymore. After all, news of his father being in remission was already public knowledge amongst his former coworkers, who had texted Kurt every now and then, asking him for updates on Burt's condition.

It was all so bittersweet because as much as Kurt couldn't wait to just go back to New York, a piece of his heart wanted to stay in Ohio with his family… And then there was also Sebastian. Sebastian who had unexpectedly become an important person in Kurt's life. Sebastian who he cared about more than he wanted to admit to himself. Sebastian who was insufferable, annoying and crass, but who was also witty and fun to be around, and an incredibly good kisser.

Kurt stared at himself in the mirror as he buttoned up his light gray shirt. He had already tried on two different shirts before this one, but none of them seemed right. The collars didn't quite work for Kurt, not when he was trying to hide a hickey that Sebastian had rudely, and quite purposely left on his neck the last time they'd seen each other. No amount of concealer was able to completely cover it, and the weather was too hot for scarves.

"I'm gonna kill him." Kurt whispered to himself as he decided to settle for the gray shirt. He still had to make sure his dad and Carole were ready to leave. They'd all been invited over to the Smythe's house for dinner, as they were going to celebrate the news they had gotten earlier that week: Sebastian was finally in remission.

The news had come just two days after Sebastian had taken his final exams at Dalton, and so Sebastian's parents thought a dinner celebration was in order. They invited Kurt's family as well, seeing as Burt was in remission too, and both families had plenty of reasons to celebrate.

Kurt was about to head out when he heard his phone buzz. He picked it up and instantly smiled as he saw it was Catherine.

Catherine: Hey Kurt! :D Have you talked to Sebastian yet?

Kurt: Not today, why?

Catherine: Ughhhhhh...

Kurt: What happened?

Catherine: I can't tell you.

Kurt: What?

Catherine: I shouldn't tell you. But I'm gonna tell you anyway… SEBASTIAN PASSED!

Kurt: Passed? You mean his exams?

Catherine: Yes dummy! HE ACED HIS TESTS!

Kurt was ecstatic… This was great news. He was about to call Sebastian to flail about it when he got another text from Catherine.

Catherine: Don't tell Bastian I told you though.

Kurt: Why not?

Catherine: It's complicated... We'll talk about it when you get home.

Kurt: Ok.

It seemed like 'complicated' was the default setting when it came to dealing with Sebastian. Kurt wondered what could possibly be going on now. Did Sebastian want to be the one to tell Kurt the news? That didn't quite seem like something Sebastian would do. Now Kurt was more than intrigued to find out what was going on.

Burt, Kurt and Carole headed to Westerville while Finn stayed home, allegedly because he had already made plans to go see a movie with Marley, but Kurt knew better. In spite of everything that had happened, Finn never quite managed to feel okay about Kurt's newfound friendship with Sebastian. So even though he had been invited to the Smythe's dinner, he decided to stay home.

They arrived to the Smythes' house, and Kurt wondered if he would be able to figure out what was going on with Sebastian, but he was all smiles and charm as he greeted Carole and Burt in the hallway. As soon as he saw Kurt, his demeanor changed... There was a mischief in his eyes and a devilish smirk that made Kurt's skin tickle with goosebumps. Kurt wondered what was up with him and considered straight up asking him but quickly decided against it when the first thing Sebastian did when was touch the collar of his shirt with his fingers and move it aside just so he could check on the hickey he'd given Kurt a few days back.

"It's fading out. Want me to touch it up?" He whispered against Kurt's ear. Kurt rolled his eyes and quickly squirmed away, rushing to catch up with his family in the dining room.

During dinner, the conversation was fairly lighthearted, even if it was a little more "proper" than usual. Kurt had spent so much time with Sebastian's family that having dinner with them was already a normal occurrence, but Carole and his dad weren't in the same page. Mr. Smythe and Burt led most of the conversational topics, randomly talking about politics and life in general. Carole and Mrs. Smythe didn't miss the opportunity to share embarrassing tales about their children, and of course Burt chimed in with a few stories about Kurt as well. Every now and then the conversation would inevitably shift towards anecdotes of being in the hospital and treatments, and every time Sebastian would turn visibly uncomfortable. So Catherine and Kurt would quickly shift the conversation back towards anything from the weather to something lighter.

Inevitably, the conversation also landed on the subject of school and college, and it was evident that it was still a sore spot among the Smythes, because only Catherine talked about what she was doing at Columbia, and her antics in the big city while Sebastian remained silent. Kurt talked a bit as well about his plans to return to New York soon, and he was glad that neither his father nor Carole dared to ask if Sebastian was going to college or what his plans were. In the midst of the conversation, Mrs. Smythe shared the happy news about Sebastian's school tests without really knowing she was breaking the news "for the first time" for the Hummels.

"We're so happy and proud of Sebastian. He did really well, as he always has."

"That's wonderful, congratulations Sebastian." Carole added sweetly, while Sebastian offered her a forced yet polite smile.

"You already got the grades? I didn't know that! When were you going to tell us?" Kurt asked, making Sebastian shift uncomfortably on his chair. Kurt was very proud of his acting skills, and judging by the look on Catherine's face, she approved too.

"We got the news earlier today, that's why I still hadn't mentioned it… Besides, it's no big deal." Sebastian said, but Carole and Burt disagreed.

"Oh but it is a big deal honey…" Carole said.

"Yeah, with everything you've gone through, you should be proud of yourself kid." But added.

"That means you can graduate with your class, right? That's very exciting news." Carole asked, and that's when it was Sebastian's time to disagree.

"Well, we don't know that yet. I mean… I am getting my diploma, but I don't think I will be attending the ceremony as such."

"Why not?" Kurt couldn't help but ask.

"It is a big event, with lots of people, lots of germs and nasty-"

"Sebastian…" His mother warned, but Sebastian continued.

"What I mean is that we're still on the fence about it. I don't think I'll be going, to be honest."

So this was it. Kurt figured this was what Catherine was talking about when she said "it was complicated". There must have been something going on between the four of them, because Catherine looked like she wanted to simultaneously laugh but also punch her brother, and Sebastian's parents were just smiling tightly, evidently having an unspoken conversation about their son's stubborn ways.

"I barely got out of the woods and so we have to run it by the doctor fist." Sebastian continued. "I mean, if I'm good enough to attend my graduation, that means I could also attend other public activities and-"

"We will know soon enough." Sebastian's dad cut in. "For now, we're just happy that Sebastian doesn't have to worry about high school anymore."

"Dessert anyone?" Mrs. Smythe added cheerfully, and with that, the conversation about Sebastian's graduation ended.

After dinner while Sebastian's parents, Burt and Carole drank coffee, Catherine, Sebastian and Kurt excused themselves and went outside by the pool. Now it was time for Kurt to get some answers of his own. Luckily he didn't even have to ask what was going on because Catherine beat him to it. Laughing out loud and berating her brother for being so difficult.

"Oh my god Sebastian… you have no shame!" Catherine said, smacking Sebastian's arm playfully as they sat down on the chairs on the poolside.

"What? I didn't say anything!"

"But you were going to! Don't even try to deny it… I thought Dad was going to choke on his pasta!"

"What's going on?"

"Sebastian is blackmailing our parents. That's what's going on!"

"What? Is blackmail your favorite hobby or something?" Kurt asked with a roll of his eyes.

"It's not blackmail, Cath… It's just making a completely reasonable compromise!"

"Do I even wanna know what this is about?" Kurt asked, feeling like he was completely out of the loop.

"Bastian could very well go to his graduation ceremony… He just doesn't want to! Doctor Meyers already cleared him for it… But he is being a little shit about it because he knows how much it means to Mom and Dad!"

"I'm not being a little shit!" Sebastian said, bending down to grab water from the pool and throwing it in his sister's direction. "You want the party too, so don't even act like you're not on board with my plan!"

"Oh god… There's a plan?" Kurt laughed.

"I just don't care about the graduation ceremony..." Sebastian said, crossing his arms over his chest and laying back on the chair. "But a graduation party… Now that is something I would definitely care about."

Kurt must have had the biggest question mark on his face because Catherine quickly explained.

"Sebastian told my mom he wouldn't attend the graduation ceremony unless they let him throw a party in our lake-house next weekend."

Kurt couldn't help but laugh out loud at that. Of course Sebastian would be like this. "I can't believe you don't want to attend your own graduation ceremony, Sebastian."

"Why would I? It's stupid… I can just get my diploma and be done with it. No boring and torturously long ceremony, no pictures and cheesy speeches… Just freedom!"

Kurt could see that there was something else Sebastian was not saying, but he knew he would have to ask him later, when they were alone. Right now, Sebastian was too busy bickering with his sister to really have a conversation with Kurt, or do anything else for that matter. It was kind of a blessing in disguise, because Kurt knew that at the pace things were going, if Sebastian and he got any time to be alone, he would just end up with another hickey… or worse.

Kurt still needed to really think about what he was doing with Sebastian. But he figured, it could wait.

…..

Time flew by and before anyone knew it, it was graduation day for Sebastian. Everyone was ecstatic except for Sebastian, so he figured he might as well suck it up and deal with it. Maybe if he tried to smile, the thing would be over sooner.

That morning he woke up feeling jumpy and unsteady. He didn't really understand why he was nervous, but he was. The fact that his uniform still didn't fit him like it used to didn't help Sebastian feel any better, but at least the graduation gown would help him hide the ill fitting clothing under all the loose fabric. Sebastian's eyebrows had thinned out with all the chemo, but Catherine had helped him fill them out a little with her makeup. Sebastian would never admit it in a million years, and threatened her with bodily harm if she told Kurt about it, but he was glad that it helped him look a little better for the thousand pictures his mother was going to be taking. She was so excited that she had even hired a photographer to follow him around for Christ's sake!

"It will be nice for you to look back a few years from now and see all these memories." His mother had told him, but Sebastian wasn't quite feeling it. Graduating high school was something Sebastian did want to remember, he just didn't want tons of pictures of him looking like he did at the moment. He wanted as little memories of having cancer as possible, and somehow having his picture taken while he was still very bald was not going to help him forget about it. Was that so hard to understand?

Like it or not, Sebastian was going to have to endure this anyway. After all, he had promised his mom that we would smile and try to have a good time.

At the end, Sebastian was able to get to an understanding with his parents. He convinced them to let him throw a graduation party at the lake-house and in exchange of he would attend the graduation ceremony, but he didn't manage to get away with his plan exactly as he wanted. Because even though his parents agreed to let him throw the party, it was under the condition that he had "adult supervision".

And well, that sucked, but after much begging and pestering from Sebastian and Catherine, they at least agreed to not spoil it completely for them. Their parents would be in Sebastian's uncle's house, which was right beside their own lake house. That way Sebastian and his friends could have a party without much interference, but his parents would still be nearby in case anything happened. It was bound to be an interesting deal, Sebastian figured as much, but at least he would still be able to have his party.

Dalton Academy was completely packed that day. The hallways and gardens were full of people, parents and families all happy and excited, wearing their best clothes for the special occasion. Sebastian's mother was wearing a teal dress she had bought especially for that day.

Looking at his mother, all dolled up and smiling made Sebastian feel a little better about this whole ordeal. It had been really long since Sebastian had seen her smile like this. His father was happy too and when he squeezed Sebastian's shoulder and told him he was proud of him, Sebastian felt a knot form in his throat. But he was not going to cry, he just wasn't.

His mother and Catherine had spent all morning in the beauty salon, getting mani-pedi's and all sorts of pampering, allegedly to be ready for the graduation. Catherine was wearing a white and red dress, which Kurt was probably obsessing about with her as they waited for the ceremony to begin. Sebastian was staring at them from behind the stage, where all the students were waiting to be seated. There was a total of forty five graduates that day, so Sebastian was sure the ceremony was going to be long and tedious.

Even from the distance, Sebastian couldn't help but stare at Kurt's ass. It was impossible not to, especially when he was wearing white pants so tight that Sebastian was sure there was no way in hell Kurt could be wearing underwear. Had he done it on purpose? Just staring at it made Sebastian wish he could get his hands on it, but he couldn't and that was pure torture. It was probably Kurt's type of payback for giving him a hickey last week, but Sebastian couldn't bring himself to care. It was Kurt's fault for having such a kissable neck.

The Warblers had a special song prepared for the graduation, of course. They couldn't waste an opportunity to perform, especially now that they were Nationals champions. Sebastian didn't perform with them, but he was still happy to see them dance and sing on stage. There was a tiny hint of melancholy that hit Sebastian as he saw the Warblers performing, but he quickly shook it off. A part of him was still sad that he wasn't able to go to Nationals with them because of being in the hospital.

True to his word, Sebastian tried his best to smile and be grateful for being able to graduate. He knew each day that he was able to enjoy should not be taken for granted. He was in remission, after all. It didn't mean he was cured, but it meant that he had beat the cancer and his life was out of danger for the time being. Focusing on those things kept Sebastian's mind busy, so the ceremony seemed to be over quickly. Sebastian got up as the principal called his name, and tried not to blush too hard, even as the whole group of graduates gave him a standing ovation. Sebastian could feel his cheeks burning up from the embarrassment, but he still smiled.

When Sebastian glanced at his mother and saw her among the crowd, she was smiling and wiping tears from her eyes, and in that moment, Sebastian wasn't able to stop the stinging of tears on his own.

Damn these emotional things. At least I'm going to have a fucking epic party the next day.

"So, where are my graduation presents?" Sebastian asked his family as he approached them after the ceremony. They all smiled and hugged him, proceeding to take even more pictures with Sebastian holding his diploma.

Kurt was there too, and when he leaned in to give Sebastian a hug, he took the opportunity for payback! Sebastian locked his arm around Kurt's waist, sliding his hand down just over the small of his back, and sucked down on his neck, making a loud kissing sound that had Kurt yelping and squirming away before Sebastian could even get to do anything else. Sebastian laughed loudly as Kurt tried his best to compose himself, trying really hard not to give away what Sebastian had just done to him.

"Sebastian! You're disgusting!" Kurt said as he wiped Sebastian's saliva from his neck, still blushing a dark pink all over his cheeks and neck, but Sebastian laughed some more.

He didn't care that his parents and sister were standing only a few feet away from them. Just seeing Kurt so flustered and embarrassed was enough satisfaction.

Kurt was so embarrassed and focused on composing himself that he didn't notice Blaine was staring at them from just a few feet away. Blaine was standing beside Trent and his family, evidently not paying attention to what they were talking about because he was too busy staring at Kurt. Blaine was looking at them like someone had just slapped him in the face. Sebastian knew Blaine had probably seen what Sebastian did to Kurt just seconds ago, and he was completely livid because of it. Sebastian held his breath for a split second as they made eye contact, feeling almost certain that Blaine was going to walk over and make a scene like he had at the mall… but surprisingly, he didn't.

Blaine just looked down at his feet and then walked away, leaving a very confused Trent behind.

"So… What is this I'm hearing about a party at the lake?"

Sebastian turned around and saw his cousin Alex standing behind him. He smiled as Alex gave him a bone-crushing hug.

"Congratulations man."

"Thanks Alex."

"So, is it true then? You're really throwing a party?"

"Damn right I am! I just got out of highschool and out of the hospital, it's about fucking time I celebrate, don't you think?" Sebastian said, and they both laughed. Soon enough, Trent and Nick walked over to where they were and Sebastian introduced them to Alex.

They all started talking about the party and a few seconds later, the rest of the Warblers were standing around Sebastian, all making plans about what they were going to do.

"So, are you going to the party?" Catherine asked Kurt.

"I don't know… Are you going?"

"Geez try not to be too excited there Kurt. Of course I'm going! Someone has to keep an eye on these guys." She said, looking at Sebastian and his friends.

"I still can't believe Sebastian got your parents to agree to it."

"You and me both." Catherine said, shaking her head and smiling. "I think they just want him to be happy, you know? As much as Mom and Dad worry about him, they just like seeing the old-Sebastian back. With all the time he spent in the hospital, isolating himself from everyone and pushing his friends away… For them to see that now Sebastian actually wants to be with his friends and organize a party is really something."

Kurt nodded, realizing Catherine was right. He hadn't seen things from that perspective, and he agreed that it was a big change for Sebastian. It was a positive thing, and who knows? Maybe it could even actually be fun.

...

The day of the infamous trip to Lake Erie, Kurt woke up feeling something very similar to what would be considered butterflies in his stomach. Except these butterflies seemed like they were trying to kill him. Kurt knew exactly why he was feeling like this… He was stepping into unfamiliar territory, seeing as he was going to spend the next two days with people he wasn't really close to. Sure, Kurt had attended Dalton a few years back, and he was friendly with most of the Warblers, but he still couldn't help but feel a little out of place. Those guys were more Sebastian's friends than they were his. At least Catherine would be there, so Kurt wouldn't be completely alone in the situation. Catherine barely knew any of the guys, but she didn't seem nervous at all.

Another thing that had Kurt feeling a little jumpy was the fact that he was going to spend an entire weekend with Sebastian. Granted, they weren't going to be alone in the Lake House, but still… They were going to be spending a lot of time together, and anything could happen. A little voice in the back of Kurt's mind kept asking: What are you doing with Sebastian? But since Kurt had no easy answer for it, he just decided to ignore it.

Kurt drove down to Sebastian's house in the early morning, as they had agreed to drive together in a single car. When Kurt got to the Smythe's house, the sun was barely coming out. It was close to six in the morning, but surprisingly they were all ready to leave. Sebastian was wearing khaki shorts and an orange t-shirt, and he'd traded his usual beanie for an New York Mets cap. He looked like he had just gotten out of bed. Sebastian's eyes looked a bit tired, but he was smiling.

Catherine was wearing a yellow sundress with white flowers, and her hair was tied up in a bun. Alex was there too, as they had all agreed and they all went together in Sebastian's parent's SUV. Catherine and Alex sat in the backseat, and Kurt and Sebastian in the second row, right behind Mr. and Mrs. Smythe. It was a three hour drive, but Kurt didn't even feel it, as they were all talking and making jokes all the way.

Kurt had never been to Lake Erie, so he was excited to see what it was going to be like. He'd googled the place to see what sort of things he would find. However, nothing had prepared him for what the Smythe's house would actually look like.

It was huge, and so so beautiful. The house looked like something out of a celebrity real estate magazine. It was two stories high, and all open spaces with big windows and large wooden decks. The property was surrounded by trees that you could see wherever you turned your eyes to. There was not only one but two main lounging areas. The first one had white and blue sofas and chairs, and the beautiful walnut wood floor was covered by a large green carpet placed right in front of the chimney. The other room had a huge flatscreen TV and what looked like sofa beds with giant pillows.

Now Kurt knew why everyone was so excited to come here. The house was incredible, and it had an amazing view of the lake with it's own private deck. Beside the house, there was a large field and a stable with horses. Kurt was in complete awe at how beautiful it all was. If Kurt's family had a house like this, Kurt would want to live here all the time, not simply visit from time to time.

"How long has your family had this house?" He asked Catherine.

"As long as I can remember. My dad completely remodeled it about five years ago though. They re-did the main structure of the house, tore down most of the walls and put glass windows everywhere… Oh and they also built the pool."

"There's a pool?!"

Catherine smiled excitedly as she dragged Kurt by the arm so she could take him outside. They walked across the house to the left wing and found the pool. It actually looked like it was part of the nature landscape. It also had a hot tub right next to it. The hot tub was sitting on top of a raised platform of rocks made to look like a mountain so that the excess water flow would make it look like a small waterfall. Kurt couldn't even pretend like he wasn't impressed. He couldn't wait to get in!

"We're gonna have so much fun!" Catherine said giddily.

When they went back into the house, they saw Sebastian's parents had already unloaded all the things from their car. Sebastian's uncle's house was supposedly nearby, but Kurt couldn't see it anywhere.

"Where's your uncle's house?" Kurt asked Sebastian.

"Come on, I'll show you." Sebastian said, putting his hand on the small of Kurt's back and guiding him outside to the front deck. Kurt stood beside him and they stared at the lake for a while. There weren't many other houses around, but the ones that were visible were quite big as well. The surroundings were quiet and peaceful, and the soft breeze soothed Kurt's nerves, even though Sebastian still had his hand placed in his back. When Sebastian finally removed his hand, it was to point to his side and show Kurt where his uncle's house was. That house was almost as big as this one, but it had a more classic look to it, while this house was more modernly styled. The other house was painted white and light blue, and there was a wooden path that connected it to the Smythe's house through the trees, but the cars couldn't go through it, so to get there with the car, Sebastian's parents probably would had to drive back and get through the main road.

"You're all set kids. Everything is in the kitchen." Sebastian's father said, walking up to the deck where they were. "We'll get going now, but we'll be right next door if you need anything. Alright?"

"Thanks Dad."

"Make sure you put everything in the fridge.. And remember, no funny business okay?" Mrs. Smythe said, coming up from behind her husband and looking at Sebastian, who just rolled his eyes and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek.

"We'll be good Mom… I promise." Sebastian said, but somehow Kurt didn't believe him... at all.

...

About half an hour after Sebastian's parents had left, Hunter arrived in his dark green Jeep Cherokee. Kurt didn't know why but that was exactly the type of car he pictured Hunter would drive. Jeff, Nick and Trent were with him but the rest of the guys were supposedly coming later with David.

Kurt knew he was only going to be gone for two days and one night, yet he felt like he hadn't packed enough. When Kurt saw the guys coming and saw their bags, he realized maybe he had actually over-packed. Catherine and Kurt went upstairs while Sebastian and the rest of the guys finished unloading the things from Hunter's car. Catherine walked with Kurt around the house, giving him a small tour. There were plenty of rooms with double beds and bunk beds, so Kurt knew finding a place for everyone to sleep wasn't going to be an issue. After they were finished with the little tour of the house, they came back downstairs and saw the guys were standing with Sebastian in a circle in the kitchen, talking and laughing. Catherine and Kurt walked over to the group and realized they were staring at a cooler in the floor, and it was full of beer cans and also vodka and tequila bottles.

"Whoa, where did you guys get all of that?" Catherine asked.

"Here and there..." Hunter said cockily, looking at Catherine and smirking.

"Very impressive." Catherine replied, returning a suspicious smirk and crossing her arms over her chest. "None of you are allowed to drink though, so put that thing away!"

Sebastian frowned and all of the guys suddenly fell quiet at Catherine's serious tone. Even Kurt was surprised at what she had said.

"Don't look at me like that. No one is allowed to drink... Until at least after lunch!"

The guys collectively sighed in relief and laughed loudly. Right then, they heard a car pulling over in front of the house, it was David with Jon and the rest of the guys. They walked out to greet them and help them with the things they brought. David brought lots of things and was even pulling a jetski in the back of his car. The guys were so excited that they immediately took their bags out of the car so David could back it up to the deck to unload the jetski… Sebastian had two other jetskis and also one paddleboat. Everyone was so excited that they were getting ready to get into the water, throwing their shoes and shirts in the deck carelessly. All their bags were left in the entrance of the house, and no one had even unpacked anything.

Catherine was the only woman in the group, but she didn't seem to mind. In fact, she wasted no time and started bossing everyone around. Reminding them to wear sunblock, and demanding Sebastian and Alex made sure to go get the life vests from the shed so everyone could wear one. None of the guys seemed to mind all her bossing them around though, especially when she ditched the small sundress she was wearing earlier and changed it for a bright yellow bikini top and dark blue booty shorts. Catherine was stunning in every sense of the word, and as much as they tried to be inconspicuous, Kurt caught Jon, Hunter and David staring at her several times with their jaws practically hanging open.

"Have you ever ridden a jet ski?" Sebastian asked Kurt, pulling him out of his thoughts. Sebastian had discarded his orange t-shirt and was wearing a white tank top now, as he was putting on his life vest.

"No never."

"Well, today is gonna be the day then… I'll let you ride with me… Get ready! Why are you still dressed?" Sebastian asked, curling one of his fingers on the hoop of Kurt's pants and pulling him towards him.

"You're really going right now?" Kurt asked, feeling a little flustered. "Shouldn't the guys at least unpack first… See where everyone is going to sleep and all?"

Sebastian squinted his eyes and gave Kurt a puzzled look. "Who says we're going to sleep at all?"

…

Kurt figured it was pointless to try to get the guys to be organized, they only wanted to have fun and party all weekend long. Which was a great plan, sure but Kurt couldn't just throw his clothes to the floor and jump in the lake, so he convinced Catherine to go with him upstairs and see which room he would be sleeping in.

"I don't know about you, but I'm claiming the master bedroom." Catherine said, winking at Kurt as they walked into the main room. It had an amazing view of the front deck and the lake. It also had it's own private bathroom with a jacuzzi.

"You can take my room if you want... Sebastian's room is good too, in case you want to sleep there."

Kurt rolled his eyes and smiled at Catherine's innuendo, but wasn't really sure about what to do.

"You can always make him sleep on the floor and take the bed if he misbehaves." Catherine teased… But then she sat down on the edge of the window and got serious. "You have to help me keep an eye on my brother Kurt, he can't drink… not even one sip!"

"That's gonna be a little hard to do, I don't think Sebastian is too keen on following the rules."

"I know." Catherine sighed, looking out the window. The guys were speeding up and down the lake in the jetskis. Teasing and yelling at each other. In the deck, Trent and Jeff were sitting in the deck chairs, waiting for their turn probably. Overall, it looked like Sebastian was having a great time.

In the end Kurt decided to leave his things in Catherine's room, and after he changed into more appropriate attire, they decided to go back outside. By the time Kurt and Catherine went back downstairs, everyone was already soaking wet from taking multiple rides on the jet skis. Kurt had his dark blue swim trunks on and a simple white t-shirt, but he knew he would have to take it off eventually if he wanted to stay under the sun for awhile. As much as he hated getting sunburned, he hated tan lines even more. With how pale Kurt's skin was, he knew there was only so much wearing sunblock could do to help. He wasn't going to let that small detail ruin this moment for him though, not at all. Kurt decided he could keep his shirt on for the time being, he had to wear the life vest anyway, and he didn't want it chafing his skin.

"My turn!" Catherine declared as she prodded David off his own jet ski. David said nothing though, and just laughed as he quickly obliged.

"Get on here!" Sebastian said, looking at Kurt as he patted the seat of the jet ski. Kurt took a deep breath and carefully stepped onto the jet ski, still fidgeting a little with the straps of the life vest as he sat down. The killer butterflies in Kurt's stomach made an appearance right when he positioned himself behind Sebastian and locked his arms around his waist.

"Feel free to grab onto me." Sebastian said, smirking over his shoulder and wiggling his eyebrows at Kurt. Kurt gave him an affectionate pinch in the ribs between the straps of his life vest, because before he could even say anything, the loud grumble of the engine started and they were speeding up far away from the deck and into the lake.

Kurt didn't know Catherine and Sebastian could be so competitive. He held on as tight as he could as Sebastian and her raced around the lake, splashing water everywhere in their wake. The adrenaline of the whole ordeal brutally murdered the butterflies in Kurt's stomach and threw him right into survival mode. Kurt went from holding on tight to holding on for dear life. Yeah, he definitely needed to learn how to ride a jetski himself because there was no way in hell he would ever ride with Sebastian like this again.

After a few hours of fooling around in the lake with the jet skis in the lake, everyone got hungry. They all agreed, much to their chagrin, that they needed to go back inside and figure out what they were going to eat.

First order of business was the barbeque. The guys had brought steaks and lots of other meats so it was time to get busy with the grill. Trent insisted he would be in charge of preparing the meat, not quite trusting any of the other guys with the task, especially because they all started drinking the minute they got into the house.

"Aren't we supposed to just throw the meat into the grill?" Thad asked, which made Trent look completely mortified.

"Not if you want it to taste good! Get out of here Thad and let me work my magic, I got this okay?" Trent replied with a roll of his eyes.

Kurt and Catherine agreed that they would get themselves busy making a salad. The rest of the guys quickly scattered around the house, snacking from bags of chips and drinking beers from Hunter's gigantic cooler.

From across the room, Kurt was staring closely at Sebastian, wondering if he was going to have a beer or not. He was talking to Alex, who wasn't drinking anything yet… With him being super Christian and all, Kurt was curious to see where he stood in regards to alcohol.

After a while, Sebastian went outside with Jeff and Alex made his way to the kitchen where Kurt, Catherine and Trent were.

"Do you guys need any help?" He asked sheepishly.

"You know how to cook?" Asked Trent.

"Not really, but I want to help… There must be something I can do, right?"

Kurt decided to take pity on Alex and gave him the tomatoes and bell peppers. "Wash those in the sink. I'll chop them."

Alex smiled, taking the tomatoes from Kurt's hands and walking towards the sink. It didn't take him a long time to finish, so after he was done he just hung around them, looking at what they were doing and making small talk here and there.

"So, are you gonna be our main chef today?" Alex asked Trent as he approached him.

"Not at all… I'm not gonna cook for all these guys for free!" Trent snorted, shaking his head "But I do consider myself an expert in the art of preparing meat for the grill… You see, people think it's easier than it actually is. But if you want to eat a perfect steak, you have to season it properly..."

Alex smiled and nodded in agreement as Trent continued brushing the steaks with melted butter and a mixture of spices he had prepared. Kurt couldn't help but notice how Trent was being extra-sassy as he spoke to Alex, but he just smiled and continued chopping the vegetables for the salad.

After Trent was done preparing the meat, they went outside where the guys had the grill ready for it. That's when Kurt caught Sebastian putting vodka inside the red cup he was carrying around. Kurt saw him right when they stepped outside, and was glad that Catherine hadn't noticed because she was too busy talking to Trent and Alex.

"Sebastian, what are you drinking?" Kurt asked, as calm as he could manage to be.

"Coke." Sebastian lied to his face, and if Kurt wasn't mad before, he was definitely mad now. He didn't want to make a scene through, seeing as everyone was having such a good time.

"I saw you put vodka in it."

"Yeah, so?"

"So, you're not supposed to drink, Sebastian." Kurt said as calmly as he could. Sebastian remained impassive, taking another long sip of his drink and looking at Kurt as he swallowed it down.

"Are you gonna tell Catherine?"

Kurt was at a loss. What was even the correct thing to do? He wasn't trying to give Sebastian a hard time, but he was concerned about his health. Kurt couldn't reply to Sebastian's question, he just gave him a concerned look, hoping Sebastian would get the message that Kurt only wanted him to be safe. Sebastian however, just sighed.

"Look Kurt, I'm not getting shit faced, okay? I just wanna have a good time. So unless you wanna give me something better to entertain myself with…"

Any other time, Sebastian's lewd comment would have made Kurt blush and laugh, but not right now. Kurt was worried.

"Fine." Kurt said, sighing. "Just… don't over do it."

Sebastian smiled widely, but it was far from making Kurt feel better, it just made him feel like a traitor to Catherine and Mr. and Mrs. Smythe. Why did Sebastian have to be so stubborn? Kurt could only hope he was going to be responsible about it and not drink too much.

The hours passed by as they grilled the meat and ate. The party was going great, and everybody seemed to be having a good time. Kurt's initial worries about feeling out of place would revisit his mind every now and then, especially when Sebastian would occasionally leave his side to go talk to someone else. Sebastian hung around Kurt most of the time, but there were times where he would go talk to the other guys and Kurt couldn't help but feel weird in his absence. It was ridiculous, Kurt knew that but his heart didn't seem to get the memo.

During the afternoon Kurt mostly hung out with Catherine and Alex, but he realized he was still able to have interesting and entertaining conversation with his former Dalton classmates. Every time Sebastian disappeared, Kurt couldn't help but look for him, following his every move to see if he was drinking more. However, Sebastian had managed to be inconspicuous, because Kurt couldn't really tell if he was drinking or not. The dark liquid in his cup could be just soda, or it could be tons of different things. Kurt wished he could just go up to Sebastian, grab his cup and demand a sip of it to verify what it was, but he knew he couldn't.

Kurt knew he needed to stop doing that before he got angry, so he decided to mind his own business and loosen up a little. Everyone was drinking, including Alex, who much to Kurt's surprise, had a beer in his hand as he continued to talk to Trent. Kurt walked over to Nick, who had named himself the party's official bartender, and asked him to prepare him something to drink. Nick smiled and quickly fixed something for Kurt.

After eating, the guys decided to take the party to the other side of the house, where the pool was. David and Thad invited their girlfriends over, and they brought a couple of friends so little by little, the attendance to the party was growing. Catherine was happy to not be the only female attendant at the party anymore and quickly hit it off with the other girls, challenging the guys to a game of pool volleyball. For a while it was all fun and games, until the girls brought more friends over. Those friends brought more booze with them, so it wasn't long before the party just rolled out into a mess of pure debauchery. Everybody was drinking, dancing and just partying it out. Some of the guys were playing in the pool and others were just lounging around getting drunk off their asses as the sun went down.

Kurt walked over to Nick and asked him to show him how to make another glass of whatever he had given to him a while ago, and Nick showed him. It was just a whole bunch of orange juice, cherry syrup, sprite and vodka with tons of ice, but it still tasted good.

Kurt had no idea why he was really drinking, but it tasted good so he figured it was okay. At this point he just wanted to have a good time. When Trent approached him and asked him if Alex was gay, Kurt just laughed out loud.

"Kurt… Don't laugh! It was just an honest question, I'm sorry."

"No, Trent… I'm sorry. I didn't meant to laugh."

"Are you drunk?"

"No!" Kurt said, offended. He wasn't really drunk. Alcohol just somehow made things funnier than they were to sober people maybe? Kurt wasn't sure.

"I don't know if Alex is gay Trent… Maybe you should ask Sebastian... Or better yet, ask Alex!"

"Are you crazy? I can't just ask him that."

"Hmmm." Kurt said, taking another sip of his drink. Trent was probably right.

"We've just been hanging out most of the day and he seems cool… I don't want to assume he is gay. He's talked about going to church and all... But I'm getting this vibes from him too and I'm just confused you know... "

"Gay vibes?"

Trent rolled his eyes. "I've always prided myself on my awesome gaydar, but now that I actually need it, it's useless. I'm lost."

Kurt put his hand on Trent's shoulder and whispered in his ear. "I could ask him if you want. But that would give it away too easy, or make him freak out. So I say you should make a move… Make it clear, but not aggressive. Be subtle but direct, Trent. Go for it."

Trent just gave Kurt a weird look and gave him a mumbled 'thanks' before walking away. Hopefully he would go and look for Alex. Kurt smiled to himself and hoped he had been able to help Trent even a little bit. After he'd finished his drink, Kurt stood up and looked around, trying to spot Sebastian but he didn't see him anywhere.

That was weird. Where had Sebastian disappeared to now?

It was already dark, but there were plenty lights around the pool and all the big windows made the light from the house light up the garden and pool area too. The group had scattered around the pool and inside of the house in the main lounge near the kitchen. But Kurt couldn't spot Sebastian anywhere, so he grabbed his glass and took one last sip before heading into the house, hoping to find Sebastian and see how he was.

It didn't take long for Kurt to find him. Sebastian was resting in one of the deckchairs by the lakeside. For a second Kurt thought Sebastian was asleep, because he was lying still, but as he walked over he realized Sebastian was just deep in thought, staring at the water while he held a cup of… something, in his hands.

Kurt walked over and stood next to him. "Hey you."

"Hi..." Sebastian looked up and offered Kurt a small smile, he looked like he was tired.

"What are you doing out here?"

Sebastian just shrugged, not really saying anything for awhile, so Kurt couldn't help but to be straightforward: "Are you drunk?"

"No... Are you drunk?" Sebastian asked back, but Kurt shook his head.

"I just had a few drinks… But I'm not there yet."

"Neither am I." Sebastian replied with an easy smile, slowly standing up and leaving his cup on the deck chair.

"What are you doing here, all by yourself?"

"I was actually hoping you'd notice I was missing…" Sebastian said with a devilish smirk, towering over Kurt. "That way you would come looking for me, and I could finally get you alone."

"Oh is that so?" Kurt replied, not really believing him, but also not being able to resist when Sebastian leaned down and pressed their lips together. A part of Kurt was certain this probably was not a good idea, because someone could see them. But being around Sebastian all day and barely touching him had Kurt longing for him in a way that he hadn't even realized he had wanted until he was finally able to put his arms around him and just… feel.

Sebastian's clothes still felt a little damp from being in and out of the water all day. His skin felt warm from being under the sun, but his lips tasted just the same as Kurt remembered them: warm, wet and intoxicating.

Kurt put one of his hands on the back of Sebastian's neck and pulled him down to be able to kiss him harder and deeper. The traces of vodka running through him gave Kurt liquid courage to not care about getting closer to Sebastian than he had ever been before. Kurt wasn't sure if Sebastian tasted faintly of vodka, or if the taste was coming from his own mouth, but he didn't really care. Not when Sebastian slid his hands under Kurt's t-shirt, pulling him closer as his mouth traveled down from Kurt's mouth and down to his neck.

Sebastian's hands grabbing his waist and his mouth working his neck were slowly driving Kurt insane, he could feel every nerve of his body on edge, goosebumps ran through him as Sebastian sucked eagerly on his neck and…

"Wait, Sebastian... " Kurt pulled away just a little, so he could stare at Sebastian straight in the eyes. "You cannot give me another hickey, I will murder you."

Sebastian just shook his head and pressed their lips together again, smiling through the kiss as he squeezed Kurt's waist affectionately. "It's not my fault you have such a kissable neck Kurt… It's all your fault, really." Sebastian mumbled against Kurt's lips before going back to kissing his neck again, this time on the opposite side of where he'd been just seconds ago.

Kurt could feel his heart beating faster and faster, every swipe of Sebastian's tongue on the skin of his neck sent electricity running through him. In the back of his mind, Kurt knew that they were in plain sight if anyone walked into the house because the space of it was so open. So he decided to pull Sebastian out of the deck. He grabbed him by the hem of his t-shirt and walked backwards until they were pressed against the wooden fence separating the deck from the field. Now they were no longer in sight, as the lights from inside the house didn't get that far. Not even the music that was blasting from the other side of the house could be really heard anymore.

Sebastian seemed impressed with Kurt's sudden move but he didn't say anything, he just kissed Kurt harder, sucking and biting his lower lip this time before letting his hands slide down to grab Kurt's ass and squeezing it a few times. Kurt gasped into Sebastian's mouth, his eyes going wide with the surprise of the unexpected touch. Green eyes met his own, their faces just mere inches apart from each other. Kurt could see a small hint of hesitation flash through Sebastian's gaze, perhaps wondering if touching him hadn't been okay, but Kurt couldn't honestly stop himself even if he tried, so he just closed his eyes and leaned up to catch Sebastian's lips again.

The fabric of Kurt's swim trunks did nothing to hide his slowly hardening erection, as he could feel Sebastian's own sliding against his thigh. This was too much, and happening all too fast, but Kurt just couldn't stop himself… He wanted to touch Sebastian and taste more and more of him, not just his lips. Sebastian turned them around, pinning Kurt against the fence and sucking down on his neck again. Now he had one hand on Kurt's neck, holding him in place and the other one slowly sliding under the waistband of his trunks.

Kurt gasped and opened his eyes, tilting his head up to give Sebastian better access to kiss his neck. Kurt's eyes wondered around the clear sky, his mind reeling from the sensation of being pressed and kissed so passionately. He could feel what little was left of his self restraint drain away with every swipe of Sebastian's tongue over his neck. They could have gone all they way right there, if they hadn't been interrupted. A soft thump of skin against glass caught Kurt's attention to one of the windows of the second story bedroom. Kurt looked up and that's when he saw it…

"Oh my god…"

Sebastian was too concentrated on kissing Kurt's neck, but Kurt couldn't believe what he was seeing. It was so bizarre that he started to wiggle out of Sebastian's embrace. "Sebastian… Oh my god, Sebastian… Sebastian…"

"What?" Sebastian finally stopped to see what Kurt was fussing about. He followed Kurt's line of sight and landed right on one of the windows of the second floor of the house where his sister Catherine was being pressed against the glass by a very handsy Hunter Clarington.

"What the fuck?!"

Sebastian was completely flabbergasted, and the reaction was so funny that Kurt almost choked on his own laughter. Catherine and Hunter were completely oblivious to the fact that they were giving Kurt and Sebastian a private show. Hunter was kissing her, which was bad enough in itself. But when Hunter's hand suddenly traveled down from Catherine's waist down to her ass, Sebastian just lost it.

"Hunter, what the fuck!?" Sebastian yelled, taking off one of his sandals and throwing it as hard as he could. Surprisingly enough, it ended up hitting the window right behind Catherine. The sound startled them out of their kissing haze and made them turn around. Once Catherine and Hunter realized they were being watched, they quickly let go of each other. Cath covered her mouth with both hands, shaking her head and laughing. While Hunter seemed to panic for only half a second before composing himself and mouthing "What?". Sebastian flipped him off and Hunter just shook his head, walking away from the window, with Catherine going after him.

Sebastian looked absolutely mortified, but Kurt couldn't stop laughing.

"Cheer up Sebastian, at least they were just kissing." Kurt said, trying to brighten his mood.

"They were right about to hook up though…"

"You don't know that... They were just kissing-"

"They were in a room!"

It was both odd and adorable to watch Sebastian play the part of the jealous brother. Especially when they walked back into the house and ran into Catherine and Hunter as they were coming down the stairs.

"Dude, that's my sister."

"I know man… But, she's beautiful."

"God… Please don't say anything else."

After that short but awkward exchange, they just went their separate ways. Catherine's cheeks were tinted a light pink, probably from both the embarrassment of getting caught but also from the three or four beers that she already had.

"Relax baby brother." She said, leaning in to give Sebastian a kiss on the cheek before walking away.

Sebastian grimaced. "I think I need a beer now."

...

It was almost eleven when most the girls had to leave. David and Thad were sad that their girlfriends had to go, because unlike the Smythe's, not all parents were so understanding and trusting of their children.

"The girls are gone, now what?" David said, falling back on the sofa pillows defeatedly.

"Now we play!" Jeff said a little too enthusiastically, pointing to the flat screen and the Xbox 360 sitting in the shelf beneath it. The guys all cheered as Jeff pulled out the Xbox controllers and soon they were all arguing about taking turns and playing.

Kurt was never a huge fan of videogames, but that didn't mean he wasn't good at them. He had Finn and Puck to thank for that, because of all the afternoons after school that they'd spent together playing Call of Duty and GTA and even Madden. So when the guys turned on the Xbox and started playing, he had no trouble blending in and having a great time. He even managed to beat some of the guys and get good laughs out of the whole ordeal.

Catherine wasn't impressed with the Xbox tournament going on, but hung around nonetheless. The guys were more than eager to teach her how to play. It was hilarious to watch Sebastian and Hunter giving each other death glares from time to time. Luckily Catherine remained oblivious to this as David and Jon taught her how to play.

Kurt wasn't sure how long they'd been playing, but it was almost midnight when he realized Sebastian had fallen asleep in the couch while he was waiting for his turn to play. Jeff tried to nod him into waking up but Sebastian was completely knocked out.

The guys were laughing and were going to take a picture of him but Catherine quickly scolded them. Kurt was glad because he knew that Catherine was aware of how active Sebastian had been during the day. It was more than likely that now he was exhausted and needed to rest. Kurt woke him up as gently as he could, and Sebastian seemed to be a little embarrassed to have fallen asleep.

"It's your turn Seb, are you up for it?" Kurt asked gently, holding the remote. Sebastian looked at it like it had personally offended him.

"Nah, I think I'll pass." Sebastian said, sitting up and stretching his arms. He gave the controller to Nick and then stood up and walked over to the kitchen. Kurt followed after him and they both stood against the kitchen island as Sebastian drank a glass of water from the tap.

"How are you feeling?" Kurt asked.

"A little tired… To be honest. I didn't mean to fall asleep though."

"It's okay. It's late… Almost midnight."

"It's still early." Sebastian mumbled as he looked at the guys in the lounge room, no one even seemed to be tired. They were all still pretty animated. Still cracking jokes, eating and drinking. Nick was about to play with Thad, and when he suggested that the loser of the match should be thrown butt naked into the lake, everyone cheered, egging him on.

"Where's Alex?" Sebastian asked. He was nowhere in sight, and right then Kurt noticed Trent wasn't there either.

"Oh my god."

"What?"

Kurt leaned to whisper in Sebastian's ear. "Is Alex gay?"

"Why are you asking me that… Did he say anything to you?"

"So he is…" Kurt assumed, putting one and two together in his mind.

"Kurt, what are you talking about?" Sebastian seemed puzzled, and Kurt just couldn't help his curiosity anymore.

"I think he and Trent are… up to something." Kurt whispered, studying Sebastian for a reaction. Sebastian smiled devilishly.

"We have to go find them."

Kurt felt like a little kid playing hide and seek as he and Sebastian snuck around the house looking for Trent and Alex. The house was huge, so there could be lots of places where to go if you wanted some privacy, but at the same time, all the windows and open spaces could be a challenge. They searched every inch of the house and didn't find them, so they decided they should search outside. They didn't find them near the pool, so Sebastian guessed they could be near the deck. However, when Kurt and Sebastian checked, they didn't find them there either.

"Let's go upstairs." Sebastian said, grabbing Kurt's hand and running up the stairs.

"But we already searched upstairs!" Kurt protested, following after a very determined Sebastian.

They got into the main bedroom, but this time Sebastian walked all the way into the bathroom. He didn't turn on the light, instead just walked over to the window right over the sinks. The huge window had a view of the wooden path that connected their house to Sebastian's uncle's house, and that is where they finally found Alex and Trent.

"What are they even doing?" Sebastian sounded almost disappointed.

"They seem to be just… Talking?" Kurt assumed. From where he was standing, he couldn't really hear anything, but it was obvious to him that if Alex and Trent were walking around by themselves, it was because they probably liked each other.

"Don't look so disappointed."

"I'm not disappointed, I was just hoping…" Sebastian stopped mid-sentence, and Kurt eyed him suspiciously.

"Hoping for what?"

Sebastian didn't say anything, but his mischievous smile told Kurt everything he needed to know.

"Oh my god Sebastian… You were hoping for some blackmail material, weren't you?"

Sebastian laughed as Kurt pinched him playfully in the ribs. "You are incorrigible!"

"Yeah well I'm not getting any… or so it seems." Sebastian said, yawning. "There's nothing interesting going on down there."

"You're tired… You should get some rest." Kurt suggested, prodding Sebastian out of the bathroom and walking with him through the dark hallway and towards his room. Sebastian seemed to be really tired, but he was still reluctant. Especially because of all the noise coming from the pool side, which told them the guys had probably stopped playing Xbox and were now outside again.

"I don't want to sleep, the guys are still outside..."

"Sebastian, if you're tired you should rest… There's nothing wrong with being tired." Kurt insisted. Sebastian reluctantly sat on the bed and Kurt sat beside him, rubbing his shoulder.

"What about you? Are you tired?" Sebastian asked him.

"A little bit… Yeah."

"So you're going to sleep too?"

"I'll tell you what… Let's take a midnight power nap. We'll sleep for a bit and then go back outside. How does that sound?"

"Sounds awesome." Sebastian said, smiling as he took off his sandals and laid down on the bed. Kurt did the same and they both laid down on their sides, facing each other. The room was dark but Kurt could see Sebastian's eyes steady on his own as they laid there, in silence. Kurt wanted to close his eyes, feeling his body heavy with the exhaustion from a day of so many activities. Kurt knew Sebastian must be even more tired than he was, but Sebastian's gaze was intense.

"What's on your mind?" Kurt asked.

"Not much."

"I don't believe you..."

"Why not?"

"I don't know... Maybe cause I saw how you were sitting by yourself in the deck... You seemed thoughtful... Like you were preoccupied with something. You can talk to me, you know?" Kurt hoped he sounded sincere and not pushy, but he could still see Sebastian's hesitation to share what was on his mind.

"I was just tired... Trying to catch a breath, the party has been pretty crazy."

"That's true." Kurt smiled as easily as he could, trying not to feel too disappointed that Sebastian wasn't talking to him.

"What?" Sebastian asked.

"Nothing..."

"What's on your mind?" Sebastian flipped the answer to him now. And so Kurt saw the opportunity to talk about what he really wanted to.

"Lots of things." He heaved a sigh... "I'm leaving for New York on Tuesday. And I'm just a little nervous about it I guess..."

If Sebastian was surprised by Kurt's news, he didn't show it.

"Oh..."

"How about you? Have you thought about what you're gonna do yet? Are you going to Columbia?"

Sebastian turned to his back and stared at the ceiling. "I don't know yet."

Kurt waited to see if Sebastian was going to say anything else about the subject... He had that look on his face that Kurt had seen many times before when Sebastian was trying to be complacent just for the sake of appearances. Kurt waited and waited for Sebastian to say anything, but he didn't. He remained silent and looked thoughtful.

"New York is awesome, I bet you're gonna fit right in." Kurt added, hoping for a reaction.

"I bet there's lots of gay bars!" Sebastian joked, still staring at the ceiling but closing his eyes from time to time.

Kurt didn't laugh or say anything... Sebastian was clearly avoiding any serious conversation with him. It was frustrating. But as much as it irked him, Kurt didn't feel like he had the energy to push it, so he closed his eyes and decided to try to fall asleep instead.

After a few minutes of silence Kurt felt the bed move. He opened his eyes and realized Sebastian had turned to his side again and was now facing him.

Kurt held Sebastian's gaze, and hoped his face would not give away any of the things that were going through his mind. Sebastian looked at him like it was a staring contest and as much Kurt wanted to resist, he ended up budging.

"What?"

"What?"

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

Kurt rolled his eyes. "Like there's something on your mind... But you just don't want to tell me."

"You want to know what's on my mind?" Sebastian smirked. "I'm thinking about what happened the last time we were in a bed together. Remember that?"

Kurt knew it was deflection at best, but Sebastian's words still unleashed a rush of heat through his body. Because yes, he remembered exactly what happened.

"Is this your way of asking me to spoon you?" Kurt replied cheekily, trying to flip the conversation onto cuddles and away from heavy kisses. If Sebastian wanted to deflect, two could play that game. However, Sebastian smiled, propped himself up on his elbow and looked down at Kurt and was completely direct on his next words.

"No... This is my way of saying I want to kiss you."

Kurt squinted his eyes, but as much as he hated himself for it he knew there was no use in trying to resist. Not when Sebastian was looking at him with eyes full of desire and want. Kurt melted into the kiss the second Sebastian's lips touched his own. It could only go downhill from there.

Kissing Sebastian was addicting and enticing... It was wrong and right all in itself. Sebastian's ability to seduce and persuade Kurt away from conversation and into making out was infuriating.

It was really unfair that Sebastian could do this to him. A part of Kurt felt frustrated about Sebastian's obvious avoidance of actually having a meaningful conversation with him, but another bigger and weaker part of him couldn't pull away from Sebastian even if he wanted.

The kiss wasn't hot and desperate like the one they'd shared out in the deck. This one was slow and languid. Sebastian's hand was on Kurt's neck, holding him in place and tracing his fingers through his hair almost absentmindedly.

Kurt was trying to keep his libido in check but the weight of Sebastian's body pinning him to the bed, the sensation of Sebastian's legs laced together with his own and the wet sounds their mouths made as they passionately kissed were all sending his hormones into overdrive.

What was he doing with Sebastian? Where was this going?

"Sebastian..."

Kurt had meant to pause their kiss and try for conversation again but instead ended up saying Sebastian's name in a rushed and breathy moan before surrendering into it once again. When Sebastian shifted from kissing his mouth to his jaw and then lower to his neck, Kurt snapped his head back and let out a soft moan. His hands came up instantly dug his nails into Sebastian's back, which made him shift his position. Now Sebastian was fully on top of Kurt, with his thigh and crotch pushing up beneath Kurt's spread legs.

Things were escalating fast and Kurt's heart was pumping blood furiously fast as Sebastian slowly moved on top of him... Up and down, up and down... Painfully slow but also creating enough friction to make Kurt feel like he wanted more...

And he couldn't get more. Not like this.

"Sebastian stop!" Kurt pleaded, pushing Sebastian away from him.

Sebastian froze immediately at the desperate tone in Kurt's plea. He stared at him completely puzzled as Kurt struggled to catch his breath.

"What's wrong?"

Kurt just stared at him and wanted to scream.

"Sebastian, what are we doing?"

"You mean besides... Kissing?"

"We're kissing cause you're avoiding having an actual conversation with me."

"No, we're kissing because I like kissing you."

"Please... I'm serious."

Sebastian sighed and rolled off of Kurt, he laid on his back and stared at the ceiling. Kurt felt cold without Sebastian's body weight over him.

"Please talk to me."

"What do you want to talk about?"

I want to talk about us, about what's going to happen when I go back to New York. I want to know how do you feel about me leaving? I want to know what these things happening between us even mean? Do you have feelings for me like I do for you?

Kurt wanted to say all those things but his tongue felt tied. He knew the minute he asked that, he would put himself in a vulnerable position that had no turning point.

"Why don't you want to talk about New York?" Was what Kurt ended up asking instead. "Every time your sister or your mom or I try to talk to you about it you change the subject... And I just need to know..."

"What do you want to know?"

"I just want to know what you're thinking, Sebastian... I want to know what you're feeling... Cause I can tell you have a lot on your mind, even though you say you don't. And I'm leaving for New York in a few days and I want to know if you will be coming too."

Sebastian stared at him for a moment and then he sat up. "You're already leaving... What difference does it make if I go with you or not?"

Those words stung deeper than Kurt expected them to. Kurt sighed, half out of frustration and half just trying to still his breathing before uttering another word.

What difference does it make? Was that a serious question? It made all the difference to Kurt... Because even though he couldn't wait to be in New York and start a new chapter in his life, Kurt couldn't see himself leaving Sebastian behind. He wanted Sebastian to be a part of his life in New York... Didn't he want the same thing? Didn't he care about Kurt the same way he cared about him? Did this all mean nothing to him?

"It makes a difference to me!" Kurt admitted, pouring his heart into every word. "It makes a difference because I want you to go to college like you told me you'd always dreamed about. Remember? You said you wanted to become an architect…"

Sebastian frowned, seemed to be taken aback by Kurt remembering that.

"I want you to be in New York with your sister, like she has always dreamed about. And honestly… I want us to be together, you know? I want to be able to see you every day and talk to you about school and about life and... Don't you want that too?"

Kurt's words hung heavy in the air between them as Sebastian just stared at him in silence. Sebastian's silence was deafening. Kurt couldn't even hear the noises coming from the guys outside in the pool anymore.

"Kurt…" Sebastian seemed tired and looked like he would rather be anywhere else than in the room with Kurt. Just the way he said Kurt's name hurt like a slap in the face.

"Does this thing between us not mean anything to you?"

"I didn't say that."

"You didn't have to!" Kurt exclaimed before he could even stop himself. "Every time I try to talk to you about it you avoid the conversation. You seemed fine just a second ago when we were fooling around but the second I try to have a heart to heart with you... You immediately close up and pull away!"

"What the hell are you even talking about?" Sebastian was defensive now, and it only made Kurt angrier.

"I'm talking about you not being honest with me! Be honest Sebastian… Just for once, stop trying to hide and pretend like everything is fine when it's not!" Kurt's breathing was getting out of control and his eyes were stinging. It was like all of his frustrations came out all at once and he couldn't stop them.

"I know things aren't fine… I don't need you to say it like it isn't obvious to me."

"Then talk to me!"

"What if I don't want to talk about it, Kurt? Why do you assume I have an obligation to expose all my feelings to you?" Sebastian's words were like a bucket of ice water being dumped on Kurt's head. "You want to know if I'm going to New York? No, the answer is NO… I'm not going, and I'm sorry if that makes you or Catherine upset, but I don't really care about what you guys think!"

Sebastian exploded all up in Kurt's face and he couldn't help but just gape in shock. Sebastian stood up from the bed and walked over to the window. He just stood there with his back turned to Kurt like he just wanted him to leave. The conversation had just turned into something very complicated and Kurt now didn't know what to make of it. He had wanted to ask Sebastian about his feelings and about New York and the future, but not like this. Everything was a mess and Kurt didn't know how to fix it, especially when they both were angry like this.

Kurt realized in that moment that he had two choices. He could walk away from the room and never touch the subject with Sebastian again, or he could stay and see if he could make things right. If Sebastian didn't care about him, he just wanted to know.

"Do you want me to leave?" Kurt held his breath, waiting for Sebastian's reaction.

After a few torturous seconds of silence, Sebastian finally turned around and looked at him.

"No."

Kurt let out the breath he was holding and stood up. He walked over to Sebastian and stood beside him, keeping a safe distance from him. He stood there, not daring to say anything or ask anything further. He had already told Sebastian he wanted him to talk to him, the ball was in his court… Kurt couldn't risk asking the wrong question and having his heart ripped to shreds.

After a long while of just standing beside each other, Sebastian finally spoke.

"I'm not good with feelings, Kurt…"

Kurt stared at Sebastian and watched him struggle to put out every word he said.

"I'm not good at handling them, and I'm definitely the worst at talking about them."

Sebastian offered him a self deprecating smile and Kurt knew he was being genuine.

"I didn't mean to yell at you like that. I'm sorry. I just wanted to get through this weekend having fun and not thinking about the future for once."

"Why?"

"Cause it's all I've been thinking about for months, and I'm tired of it. I spent months in the hospital just trying to get through each day, wondering if I would ever be able to do all the things I wanted to do… The cancer changed me Kurt. I'm not the same person I was seven months ago."

Kurt took a step closer to Sebastian, not daring to touch him, but slowly closing the distance between them.

"Everyone is acting like just because I'm in remission now I can continue on with my life like nothing happened, and it's not that simple. I don't want to go to college Kurt, not like this."

"What do you mean?"

"I don't feel like starting a new life in a new city right now… Not when I don't feel like myself yet. I'm exhausted all the time. I can't even spend a day having fun without feeling like I ran a fucking marathon. I look like a fucking posterchild for cancer survivors, and I don't want people at college forever remembering me as 'that guy who had cancer his freshman year.' It's fucking depressing."

Kurt saw the sincere way which Sebastian spoke and immediately regretted the way he had approached the situation to begin with. He had been so preoccupied with his own feelings about Sebastian and him that he hadn't stopped to think about everything else Sebastian was dealing with. He couldn't help but feel like a selfish prick, to a point.

Now Sebastian had finally expressed how he felt about the situation, even though he still hadn't really answered Kurt's question regarding his feelings for him. Kurt was afraid to bring it up though, because everything else made it seem so insignificant. But it wasn't insignificant, not to Kurt.

"I'm sorry." Kurt sighed, taking another step towards Sebastian and putting his hand over Sebastian's as it lay over the window frame. "I didn't mean to disregard your feelings about all this… I was just… I just didn't see things that way."

"You don't have to be sorry, Kurt… You were right, I was avoiding having this conversation. I've been avoiding talking about it with my parents and my sister… You just actually dared to confront me about it."

Kurt smiled tightly, and Sebastian smiled back.

"I do care about you, Kurt… But I can't go with you to New York."

"It's okay, I understand." Kurt replied, feeling his heart breaking a little bit even though he was smiling. "So… What happens now?"

"I don't know... You and Catherine go to New York and keep me updated about all the things you'll do in the city?"

"And what happens with us?" Kurt asked, and Sebastian's smile dropped a little, as did Kurt's heart.

"I don't know." Sebastian admitted. "I don't even know what's happening right now."

Kurt smiled, because neither did he. Before Kurt could even say anything though, Sebastian beat him to it.

"I really like you Kurt…"

"There's a 'but' coming, isn't it?" Kurt interjected, and Sebastian sighed.

"Kurt... I just don't want you to go to New York and feel like you have an obligation to me. Anything can happen in six months… Maybe you will meet some cute New Yorker that will ask you out and rock your world, and I don't want to get in the way of that."

Kurt knew what Sebastian was saying was reasonable to a point, but that didn't mean it hurt any less. It must have showed through the brave facade Kurt was trying to maintain because Sebastian closed the distance between them and held his face in his hands.

"Now it's your turn… Tell me what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking this sucks." Kurt admitted sadly. "But I think you're right… So whatever we are right now, needs to go back to just being friends... Right?"

"Right." Sebastian conceded, still holding on to Kurt's face. "Except we were never really just friends."

"Yes we were… It just was a weird, and complicated type of friends."

"Yeah. So maybe that can change."

"Or maybe it doesn't have to."

They both smiled at that, and for a second Kurt thought Sebastian was going to kiss him on the mouth, but instead Sebastian just leaned over and pressed his lips affectionately to Kurt's forehead. Sebastian then took half a step back and eyed Kurt suspiciously.

"What?"

"Friends can still take naps together and cuddle, right?"

Kurt rolled his eyes and laughed out loud, grabbing Sebastian by the arm and dragging him back to the bed. Because yes, maybe Kurt was going to back to New York on Tuesday and Sebastian was not coming with him, but that didn't mean they couldn't enjoy what was left of the weekend as friends. After all, that was what they had been all this time… Just friends.