H.M., M.D.

Face whistled to himself as he looked at his reflection in the mirror and made sure every hair was in place and that everything was straightened out perfectly on his doctor's uniform. He doubted that the staff at the V.A. really paid much attention to those little details, still it wouldn't hurt, especially if he managed to get a date with one of the young nurses working there. Last minute check test, make sure he had everything: mask, gloves, stethoscope, little black bag, and some forged documents necessary to get Murdock released to his care, check.

There was no mission this time, they weren't in a race to get Murdock out of the hospital ASAP, it was just decided by Hannibal, of course, that it was time they got Murdock out on leave for the weekend so the four of them could get together and have some fun. B.A. would insist they'd have a better time without Murdock, of course, but Face knew the sergeant better than that. The truth was no matter how annoying Murdock could be, and Face knew only too well from bunking with him over the years how annoying he could get, he always livened things up for all of them. He didn't know what Murdock's new obsession or persona or psychosis would be, but he was sure it would be one they'd never seen before; Murdock rarely enjoyed repeating himself for some reason.

On a bright side, Face noted, they wouldn't have to be cooped up with Murdock inside for the whole weekend; the sun was out, the sky was clear, if things got too stuffy around Murdock when he went off on one of his latest obsessions, either they could step outside for some air, or B.A. could pick Murdock up and toss him into the outside pool at the new house Face had managed to scam for them. Of course there was never any truly ideal time to get Murdock, but when it rained was among the worst, especially if it stormed because Murdock wasn't above trying to make them all paranoid about escaped killers or ghosts in the closet or even haunted toasters or something like that. If only he could find a way to put that television set in Murdock's room out of commission, he was watching too many old haunted house movies.

He got in his car and drove up to the V.A. and whistled to himself as he walked up to the building's entrance. Mentally he rehearsed one more time what he was going to say, he'd gone through so many routines getting Murdock out over the years that he was starting to watch to make sure he didn't repeat himself.

Coming to an abrupt stop at the front desk, he dropped his black bag as if it was a workman's toolbox and said to the registration nurse, "Good morning, I'm Dr. Lawrence Wilcox and I'm here to see a patient, one Captain H.M. Murdock."

The young woman looked at him curiously and asked, "What do you wish to see Mr. Murdock about?"

"He is one of a handful of patients who have been selected for a new study approved by the government. We are attempting to study the brain of war torn Veterans while they are still alive instead of waiting for them to be willed to science. A dead brain is no good in attempting to find cures for live patients, and it's to my understanding that Captain Murdock is a most peculiar case all his own, possibly a whole case study all his own."

"I'll have to clear this with another nurse, just one moment," the woman said as she got up from her desk and went to find one of the older nurses.

Face hummed to himself and drummed his fingers on the desk top as he waited, a moment later a big fat bossy woman he had personally come to refer to affectionately as 'Nurse Dragon' whenever she wasn't around, came up to see what was going on. He spun his yarn again and this time made sure to really sell it since everything had to be cleared by this woman. He couldn't count his blessings enough that this woman, who had seen him off and on for so many years, hadn't yet put the pieces together as to the running joke in this hospital.

"Mr. Murdock is in room 104 in the psychiatric wing, I'll show you the way," she said to him.

"That will be fine, nurse," Face said, "Incidentally, it is of a large interest between my colleagues and myself…in this hospital do you refer to all patients as Mr.?"

"Yes, we don't have any women here," the nurse told him.

"So noted," Face rolled his eyes, "But what I was referring to is why are these men addressed by gender formality titles, and not rank? Murdock was a Captain in the services."

"Was is correct, Doctor," the nurse said, "Not anymore, none of these men are the soldiers they were."

"Their treatment received by their families, their government and their whole country isn't bad enough, now they must be stripped of what little dignity they have left by those overseeing their care in this hospital?" Face asked, enjoying every moment of it while he got to watch the woman squirm in trying to answer that one, "It's no wonder they have so much trouble adapting to life back from the battlefield, they go over to serve their country, and come back to be treated like a chewed up piece of bubble gum on the bottom of your shoe."

"We all have our orders to follow in this life, Doctor," the nurse told him, "Those are our orders on how to treat the patients."

"It is to my understanding that Captain Murdock is one of your more unique patients, is that correct?" Face asked as they neared room 104.

"That's the understatement of the year," the nurse snorted.

Face pulled the mask up and said, "You'll have to excuse me, some of the hospitals we've been picking up the men for the test studies from have been having horrible epidemics, as a physician I can't see taking anymore chances than we already do in our everyday lives."

Their conversation was cut off by a sudden commotion coming from Murdock's room. Face couldn't make out what it was but it sounded like one of those old cartoons where several people spin around in a cyclone and every few seconds pull out a chainsaw or a sledgehammer or dynamite as a new accompanying noise joined the mixture. He and the nurse ran and through the window in the door he could see Murdock standing on his dresser hovering over two orderlies and a nurse who were trying to restrain him. He screamed and kicked at them and knocked over anything within his reach and jumped out of the way again. Face threw the door open and stormed in and demanded to know, "What in the world is going on in here?"

Though his mask was drawn up on his face, there was no mistaking him, and Murdock momentarily forgot the cover and jumped on Face and begged him, "Don't let them take me! I didn't do anything!"

Face managed to pry Murdock's hands off of him and repeated, "What is going on around here?"

Everybody tried talking at once so Face had to tell them all to shut up, and ordered them to explain one at a time. The other nurse explained that Mr. Murdock was being examined to make sure he was in good condition for his procedure tomorrow. Face felt his eyebrows knit together and he asked, "What procedure?"

"Mr. Murdock has been scheduled to have a lobotomy tomorrow," the younger nurse told him.

"A what?!" Face felt his blood beginning to boil and he was ready to shoot through the roof.

"Tell them I don't need it," Murdock said as he got behind Face and used him for a shield, "Tell them I didn't do anything, doc, tell them!"

"Nurse!" Face said in a tone that would make him perfect as a commanding officer, "Could I see Captain Murdock's form?"

"Yes, Doctor."

The dragon nurse followed her out to make sure that there were no mix-ups, leaving the four men in the room. Face turned to the two orderlies in the room and told them, "Get out!" Since he was the one in the white coat, nobody was going to question his word for it, and the two men quickly left the room.

"Don't let them do it, Face," Murdock murmured into his ear, "Don't let them do it to me, please."

"Murdock, calm down," Face said quietly, assuredly, "I'm going to get to the bottom of this. Did they say anything?"

"They just came in and told me I was scheduled for surgery tomorrow," Murdock told him, "They wouldn't say why, but they don't go around taking out half your brain just for the hell of it. At least I hope they don't...you don't think they do, do you, Facey?"

Face sucked in a deep breath and stood tall when the two nurses returned and handed him the paperwork for the surgery. Face scrutinized over every word on the form, and pushed Murdock back when he sensed the pilot reading over his shoulder, and he felt his eyes widen when he spotted the smoking gun.

"Nurse," he said in his authoritative tone, "This form is for an M.D. Murdock, not H.M. Murdock."

"What?" the dragon nurse asked and took it back from him and read it over for herself, "Oh for heaven's sake…"

"You have more than one patient named Murdock in this hospital?" Face asked.

"Yeah," she answered, "M.D. Murdock is a new patient, just got transferred here…I'm terribly sorry about this, Mr. Murdock."

"Oh that's alright," he replied as he came out from behind Face, "Just don't let it happen again. Don't be a stranger now, y'hear?"

"Doctor," the dragon lady said as she looked over the form in her hand and tried to figure out which to take care of first, "I'm going to get the paperwork taken care of for Mr. Murdock's release, and then we'll tend to our new patient, I'm terribly sorry about the mix-up."

"Well you should be," Face told her, "For crying out loud this is supposed to be a professionally run hospital, are you trying to give the public the impression that it's the patients running this place into a madhouse instead?"

He hollered down the hall a little more even once the nurse had left, and then when they were alone, he turned to Murdock and said, "That was weird."

Murdock let out a shaky exhale of relief and said, "Thanks, Faceman, that was a close call."

"Murdock," Face said as he peeled off his mask, "Who's M.D. Murdock?"

The pilot shrugged and said, "I don't know, I didn't know there was another me in this hospital."

"Murdock," Face thought of something, "If he's due for a lobotomy, doesn't that mean he's also a mental patient here?"

"Well it's not written in stone but that is the general idea," Murdock told him.

"Alright, tell me something else, is there anyway you can find out who this guy is before we leave?" Face asked.

"Sure, just give me a minute and hang close by," he answered.

"Alright," Face said helplessly, what else could go wrong?

Murdock asked around with some of the neighboring patients and when he got an answer, he led Face down the corridor to the patients' recreation room where ideally they could watch TV and play cards and write letters to their families on the outside, but more realistically they ate the cards and tried wearing the TV antenna and just sat around babbling to themselves.

"How're we going to know which one he is?" Face asked.

Murdock pointed to someone in the middle of the room and said, "There he is, I don't know him."

They went over to the man who looked about 10 years younger than Murdock, had a head full of short dark hair, was dressed in blue jeans and a dirty white T-shirt and whose head kept drooping for a few seconds before he jerked awake again, though his eyes didn't open all the way or even halfway anymore.

"M.D. Murdock?" Face asked.

The young man didn't answer to his name, didn't acknowledge hearing or seeing anybody standing right in front of him, he only rolled his neck from one side to the next and said in a shaky voice, "Can't sleep, they'll kill me…can't sleep, they'll kill me."

"No wonder this guy's having a lobotomy tomorrow," Face commented.

Murdock knelt down to look up at the man and he looked back to Face and told him, "Facey, something's wrong here."

"What is it?" Face asked.

"Something's wrong with this guy alright, but it's not psychotics, or psychoses, or medication, or his own delusions…now I know, I've seen these guys every day, I know what those all look like, this ain't that, this is plain fear. I don't think this guy belongs here."

"Well if he doesn't belong here," Face said to the pilot, "Why is he here?"

The gears were already turning in his head because he knew they didn't have much time, and he was right. A few seconds later he heard Mrs. Dragon's voice booming off the walls as she found them and demanded to know what they were doing there.

Face pulled his mask up on his face again and turned around to face the nurse and asked her, "Is this M.D. Murdock?"

"Yes that's him," she answered, "Why?"

"Hold off on that surgery," Face told her, "I need to know how long this man has been a patient in this hospital."

"Only for the last couple of weeks."

"Well put him in a private room and keep him there," Face instructed her, "It's too soon to tell but I think some of my colleagues will be paying this hospital a visit to see this man. Don't say a word of it to anybody, it's a matter of National Security."

"I don't understand," the nurse said.

Face kept to himself the comment that there was a statement she ought to have tattooed on her forehead. Instead he told her that if the information fell into the wrong hands, millions of people's lives could be at stake. After that it didn't take much to shut her up and get Murdock out of there.

Once Face got Murdock out of the V.A., they went back to the house he was using for the time being; Hannibal and B.A. were already there waiting for them. As soon as they got in the house, they bombarded Hannibal with the details of what happened when Face went to the hospital to retrieve Murdock. Both the colonel and the sergeant looked as confused by this story as Face knew he and Murdock both felt.

"A lobotomy?" Hannibal repeated in disbelief, "They still do those?"

"Apparently," Face answered, "I thought they quit doing them 10 years ago, but I guess we were wrong."

"Colonel," Murdock said, speaking up for the first time since they'd gotten in the house, "I want to hire the A-Team to get M.D. Murdock out of the hospital. Now, I've been there long enough to know when something's right and this ain't right, something's up and I think we need to find out what it is and we have to do it fast before they take out half this guy's brain tomorrow."

Hannibal considered it for a moment before responding, "I'm inclined to agree with you, Captain."

"So exactly what are we going to do, Hannibal?" Face asked.

Hannibal scratched his head and asked them, "Do you know anything about this guy?"

"Yeah, a little," Face answered snappily, "Like for one thing, Murdock's right and this guy doesn't belong in the V.A. Once we left I made a few phone calls and did some checking, there is no record of any M.D. Murdock serving in any branch of the military, so how does he qualify for Veterans Administrative care?"

"How indeed?" Hannibal agreed, he turned to the sergeant and asked, "What do you think, B.A.?"

"Sounds like something's wrong alright, but what are we going to do with another Murdock? What if this one's as bad as the crazy fool we' already stuck with?"

Hannibal looked back to the pilot and said, "That's a good point, what're the chances that this guy could be a relative of yours?"

Murdock shrugged and said, "It beats me, Hannibal, but if it is I'd be honored to have him in my company."

"Great, but how are we going to get him out of there?" Face asked, "They're operating on him first thing in the morning."

Hannibal chuckled as he took out a new cigar and lit it, "Fear not, Face, as usual, I've got a plan."

"Alright," Face waited a few seconds and asked him, "How about now? Is now a good time to be afraid?"

Murdock turned his attention from the conversation in the living room, to the skyward view right outside the sliding glass doors. The sun was gone and the blue of the sky was now covered by a building cluster of gray clouds.

"I sense a storm coming," he commented, speaking in more than just the meteorological sense.

Hannibal's plans were always a little farfetched when looked at at face value; they always required the most absurd props and equipment, but this one, for all the sense that it actually made, still struck Face as being one of the oddest ones yet. The list of things Hannibal needed to pull off this plan involved another doctor's coat, a change of clothes, a false ID badge, a movie makeup kit, a dark wig and matching fake mustache to go nicely with his new skin tone, as well as a suiting change of clothes for B.A. and an ambulance ready to go. He'd already explained his plan to Face twice, and while it sounded as logical as any of Hannibal's plans could, and would coincide nicely with the window of opportunity he had left open upon exiting the V.A. with Murdock, he still had a bad feeling in the pit of his stomach that something wasn't going to go right.

Of course he would've felt better going back to the hospital with Hannibal himself but he knew that wasn't a possibility; now, he had to stay home with Murdock while Hannibal and B.A. went to investigate at the hospital. As he watched them drive off, he happened to look up and noticed that the sky was gradually getting darker; and if he listened closely enough, he would almost swear he could hear thunder in the distance.

"Bad weather on the way, Faceman," Murdock said as he walked outside to join the lieutenant.

"Think it's a sign?" Face asked.

"Don't know."

Face looked at Murdock and asked him, "Do you really think this guy could be a relative of yours?"

"I wouldn't give much for those chances, but I'm hoping," Murdock replied, "It would be nice to have somebody in the family around again…" he stopped, and thought about something, and started laughing.

"What's so funny?" Face asked.

"M.D. Murdock," he said, "Maybe it's backwards and he's really a doctor."

"Why would a doctor be a patient?" Face asked him.

"Oh you'd be surprised how many of the doctors at the V.A. come up hospitalized all the time," Murdock told him, "They're always having to be sedated or put on bed rest, or something."

Face thought about it and said, "I guess dealing with crazy people all day would do that to you."

"You have no idea," Murdock said as he took his cap off and scratched the top of his head, "You'd be surprised how many doctors I've been to see who shot themselves either right after their first session or right before the second session with me."

Face tried to be reassuring as he said, "I'm sure that's just a coincidence, Murdock."

"So how long do you think they'll be gone?" Murdock asked.

"With Hannibal's plan at work?" Face asked as he looked skyward again, "Who knows?"

Murdock looked at him and asked, "What do you want to do in the meantime till they get back?"

Face checked his wristwatch and asked, "How about we get lunch?"

"Alright," Murdock followed him back to the house, and then asked, "Oh, did you remember to get those pickled pigs feet I told you about for my new recipe?"

"Uh…the market was fresh out," Face told him.

"Oh drat," Murdock snapped his fingers, "I suppose it'll be back to green olive and jelly sandwiches then."

Face got a pained look on his face and said to the pilot, "None for me, thanks."

"But you know something I wonder, Face?" Murdock asked as he walked up the steps, "Since this other Murdock isn't a Veteran, what's he doing in a Veterans hospital? Now that's the $500,000 question."

"That's the million dollar question, Murdock," Face told him.

"I know," Murdock said as he held the door open for Face, "But I'm counting it after the taxes."

Face cocked his head to the side and said, "Good point."