*AN* Sorry for the lack of updates guys! Life's been busy! (Creative juices are also running on empty) I will try and refuel (hahaseewhatIdidthere) and update more often! 3

*Sol*

It's been 6 days since Shuusei woke up, and he's already able to walk around. I vehemently argued with Takashiro, but we're leaving for Twilight mansion today. I can tell that Shuusei's still in pain, as much as he tries to hide it, and I'm pissed that Takashiro thinks he's ready for travel, but it's not my place to argue. Most of our clothes and personal belongings have already been transferred to the mansion, and we each have a small bag with us now that holds the necessities we used while in the hospital. We're outside now. It's chilly and I stand next to Shuusei, who's shivering slightly despite wearing a thick coat. Our gloved hands hover millimeters from each other. The very familiar black car pulls up to the front of the hospital and Takashiro's secretary leaves the drivers seat to open the back doors. I hoist both Shuusei and I's bags, I absolutely refused to let him carry his, into the trunk of the car before sliding in next to him. The setting is eerily familiar as we travel to Twilight mansion. Shuusei gazes out the window, and I suppress the urge to touch him. He seems so delicate to me now, now that I know how every bit of contact causes him pain. I stare at my hands, they are unmarked and clean, but they carry blood and suffering. I have been trying, and failing, to suppress my guilt, as per Shuusei's request. I know I'm causing him guilt by feeling guilt, and that creates more guilt in a vicious cycle of regret. The car pulls into the hidden pathway to the mansion and I can tell we've entered the barrier. All outside noises are silenced. We come into view of the massive building, and an intense wave of nostalgia washes over me. From here I can see the balcony of my room, home to so many memories from lives past. The car slows in front of the main entrance, and Tachibana bursts out of the door to greet us. He greets Shuusei with a shout and greets me with a full blown tackle. I curse as I fall to the ground, kicking him off me and sending him flying.

The main hall looks mostly the same as I remember it from past lives, although my memory is a little fuzzy. Shuusei continues up the winding staircase and heads straight for our rooms. I follow him, jogging a bit to catch up. He stops in front of one room and smiles at me.
"This one's yours." He then points to a room across the hall, "and that one's mine." He takes his bag from my grasp and opens his own door, disappearing behind it temporarily before reemerging. Tachibana calls up from the dining hall, his voice unnecessarily loud.
"SHUUSEI, HOTSU, DINNER~!" I'm about to shout back down at him when Shuusei grabs my arm and drags me downstairs.
The table is set with a wide array of foods, with four plates and utensils wrapped neatly in a cloth napkin. A very young cook stood in the corner of the room; as if presenting his work.

"Ah, so you repainted." Shuusei notes. The cook looks puzzled.
"It's been like this for at least thirty years hasn't it?" He asks hesitantly. Shuusei smiles at him without responding, it's too much trouble to explain that he meant from our past reincarnation. I sit in a chair near the head of the table, and Shuusei slides into the chair next to mine. Takashiro appears, apparently out of nowhere, to sit at the head of the table, and Tachibana sits across from me. The table feels empty, as the four of us only occupied a mere fraction of the massive dining table. As the cook placed a salad in front of us, I ask,
"When are the others coming?" I notice the slice of tomato in the salad and grimace. Shuusei sighs and takes it from my plate, popping it in his own mouth.

"The siblings should be coming within the next month or so. Kuroto is still training with his new partner, and Sairi and Ria won't be coming for a while." Takashiro says. Shuusei and I tip our heads in acknowledgement. We eat in silence; the cook had prepared a feast for us. Plates and plates of different meats and side dishes pile onto the table. Shuusei doesn't eat much, I glance over at him between every few mouthfuls. He notices my sour expression and smiles lightly.

The cook, Toma, brings out a cart laden with piles of cakes and other desserts. Shuusei excuses himself with a quick, "Excuse me." I start to get up with him when he places a hand on my shoulder and gently pushes me back down into my seat. I turn and stare after him as he walks out of the room. I notice him wobble slightly. Appetite lost, I stare blankly at the plate of strawberry cake. Tachibana leans his head in his hand and stares at me knowingly.

"Worried Hotsu?" I glare at him, and he grins back at me. Takashiro stands up.

"Hotsuma, I'm going to the police station. World's End is investigating this new string of murders, and we believe it may be Duras related." I continued staring at my plate, using my fork to roll the chocolate covered strawberry around the small plate. "We may need you and Shuusei sooner than expected." At these words, I stood up suddenly, knocking my chair over in the process.

"Shuusei isn't recovered yet!" I say, turning to face him. "Send me alone."

"Don't worry Hotsuma." He chuckles, which only enrages me more. "He shouldn't be directly involved in fighting for a while." He leaves the room and I grimace and turn away. Damn him.

I stomp up the stairs to Shuusei's room. He's sitting on the windowsill, staring at the setting sun. The orange light illuminates his profile and casts a warm glow upon the room. I stare at him, slightly breathless. Apparently noticing my presence, he turns to face me and smiles warmly. He pats the seat next to him with his hand, inviting me over. I stride over and take my place next to him. A chill breeze blows through the window and I close my eyes, enjoying the refreshing air. His breathing is slightly erratic and I glance at him worriedly. I reach out to touch him and he shies away. He looks at my slightly hurt expression and I can see the guilt flash across his face.

"No Hotsuma, I.." He starts, but I turn away. Regret crashes painfully onto my shoulders. He's afraid of me. I force a fake grin onto my face.

"It's been a long day. Shuusei, get some rest." I stand and turn to hide my face. A lump rises in my throat as I leave him alone, shutting the door behind me. I'll spend the rest of my life atoning for what I've done. I can only pray that he'll forgive me.

*Luna*

Excusing myself from the dinner table, I stumble out of the dining room. I traversed the staircase quickly, and collapsed as I reached my room. My wounds were burning under the bandages. I slowly crawled to the side of my bed and shivered as pain coursed through me. The burns hadn't healed completely, and every movement caused fresh agony. I had been lying to Hotsuma for days, and also to the doctors, saying it doesn't hurt anymore. I can't stand to see him blame himself.

I close my eyes as I wait for the pain to subside. These attacks happen randomly and frequently, it takes all my strength to hide it from Hotsuma. Takashiro has noticed, he's much more perceptive. The pain dulls to a pulsating ache. I release the breathe I had been holding and allow my body to relax. I hear Tachibana's voice downstairs and gather myself off the floor. Hotsuma should be upstairs soon.

I meander towards the windowsill and sit, careful to arrange myself so my back and shoulder didn't have any contact with the wall or window. I arrange myself comfortably just as Hotsuma barges in, panting slightly. I wait until I have full control of my facial expressions and turn to greet him. At my beckoning, he takes a seat next to me. A breeze rushes in through the window and it sends a jolt of pain through my shoulder. I manage to keep my face blank, but a slight gasp escapes from my lips.

Damn. Hotsuma's head flicks towards me, eyebrows furrowed. He leans towards me, hand outstretched. Like a wounded animal, I twitch away from his touch involuntarily. Horrified at my own actions, I stare at him. I can see the pain in his eyes and it causes my hearts to skip a beat.

"No Hotsuma, I…" I stumble, trying to find the right words to apologize with. He's already turned his face away. "What have I done?" I think, panicked. For Hotsuma, who believes himself a monster, me running from him is just a confirmation of his fears. He stands up and turns to leave. He mumbles a farewell as he strides away from me. I reach out to grab him, but I hesitate. What can I possibly say to him? The door clicks shut and the soft patter of his footsteps signal his return to his own room. My heart cold as ice, I bury my face in my hands.

Why can I do nothing to help him? Why am I so useless?

Why can I do nothing but love him…?

Whoa Shuusei admits he's in love whaaaat?