Thranduil was born at night, but not last night. While Fili is the official heir, Thranduil can see that Kili is obviously Thorin's favorite, what with the doting, and the concern, and the ringing of hands BY THE GODS KILI ARE YOU HURT MY BB
So he seduces Kili, blatantly and conspicuously, just to add insult to Thorin's injury/jailing.
+1000 if Kili doesn't quite get what's going on, being dwarf jailbait and not having had the talk about staying away from dirty old elf kings
+10000 if Thranduil treats him lecherously(is a word? Yes?), but kindly, and Kili doesn't understand, Thorin made it seem like these elves were worse than orcs, but they're really quite lovely, and Thranduil is so impressed with his archery skills, and compliments him on his accuracy, and Kili feels like he's betraying his uncle but he just can't stop blushing and squirming and feeling generally pleased with the attention, and Thranduil is so strong for someone so skinny it's rather impressive, and he smells really pretty, and Kili hasn't gotten to sleep on a real bed since this adventure started, and oh hey a back rub? More elf wine? Wow thanks King Thranduil!
+100000000 if Fili tries to bargain with Thranduil, ie "I see what you're doing, but my brother's an idiot, wouldn't you rather have someone with a bit more experience?" and Thranduil, having been playing this game before Fili's ancestors were even born, someone manages to do them both, completing his Line of Durin dwarf bingo card. (Because obviously Thranduil and Thorin were doing it back in the day, Thorin's level of rage is the kind that only comes from a humiliating breakup.)
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"I heard that you favour bow and arrow. Unusual for a dwarf." A dwarven archer how presumptuous.
"Then you haven't met many of us."
"Are all of them as talented as you?" Thranduil asked, not rising to the poor baiting.
"I'm quite good."
"You're being too modest. My guards told me that you shoot better than most of them." Because they were drunken out of their minds.
"I can probably shoot better than all of them."
"I'd like to see that", Thranduil lowered his eyes and smiled at Kili from under his lashes. To see you humiliated, little dwarf, he added in his head.
"If you want", Kili said, sounding a little uncertain of the situation.
Thranduil put the bow on the table. "Did you fashion your bow yourself?"
"I did", Kili admitted.
"You must be highly valued among your people. I have rarely seen a bow crafted like this." So crude even Orcs could do better, he thought with disdain.
"I make my own arrows as well", he added a little proudly.
"As a true archer should." Thranduil took one of Kili's hands between his own, caressing it lightly but not too obviously. "Your hands show a dexterity that is rare in this world."
"You are very fair…I mean your hands…they are fair. Not that you're not fair", he added quickly, his cheeks turning red.
Thranduil laced their fingers together and gave him a bashful smile. "I gladly accept your high praise."
Kili gulped down the rest of his wine. Thranduil thought that he looked frightened, so unlike Thorin. Thorin had been self-assured up until the moment Thranduil had reduced him to begging to be taken by him.
Thranduil leaned in, caressing Kili's face with his fingertips. "You are fair for a dwarf."
"I'm just young", Kili replied.
"Youth and beauty have nothing to do with each other", Thranduil leaned a little closer.
"I…I should go back", Kili stuttered and swallowed. He looked enticing and sweet, long lashes framing beautiful dark eyes.
"Of course", Thranduil pulled back but not without letting his finger accidentally caress Kili's lips which parted slightly under the unexpected touch. "Your brother and uncle are probably worried about you. I remember how much value Thorin places in his family and deservedly so."
"Thank you", Kili said sincerely.
"Maybe in a day or two you could show me your skills?" Thranduil asked casually.
"If you wish."
"I do", Thranduil said pleasantly then nodded to the guards to escort Kili back to the cells.
He smiled to himself as soon as the door was closed. Elbereth was truly smiling down on him. Not only had he captured Thorin but also his nephews and heirs. That alone would have been enough but Thorin's blatant protectiveness of the younger one had played right into Thranduil's hand.
/
"You look very unlike your brother", Thranduil observed when Fili took the offered place. The young dwarf had demanded to speak to him and Thranduil was not one to reject entertaining company. "I understand you're Thorin's heir?"
"That doesn't concern you."
"It will concern me. I will considerably longer than any of you will." Thranduil leaned back and took another sip from his wine. "You said you wanted to talk with me."
"I want you to leave my brother alone."
"I can see Thorin taught you leadership but not diplomacy. I find pleasure in your brother's company. Why should I give that up?"
"He's young, naïve, inexperienced."
"Maybe I find the touch of innocence enjoyable." Thranduil allowed his smile to become lecherous. "And Thorin values him greatly."
"I am his heir."
"So you admit it." Foolish boy, Thranduil thought with a malicious pleasure. You are right where I want you.
"Yes."
"That is still no incentive to give up your brother."
"I'd offer something else instead." Their eyes met and Fili added, "me."
"Intriguing", Thranduil wanted to savour this moment. "But how will I know that you're as entertaining as your brother?"
"I'm offering now."
"You'd go that far for your brother? To keep him safe from me." The victory tasted sweet on his tongue and headier than any wine. The stupid dwarf had walked right into his trap.
"Yes."
"Anything I want? Because I doubt your brother would even remember the word no once the pleasure overwhelms him."
"You think highly of yourself."
"Not at all", Thranduil kept his eyes on Fili's face to take in his reaction when he added, "just ask your uncle."
To his disappointment Fili barely bat a lash. "Strip", he ordered him instead.
Fili shed his clothes methodically, without a hint of seduction but also without resistance. Throin had taken great delight in teasing him back then, pulling his trousers down only to bend and unlace his shoes, giving Thranduil a tantalising view of his arse, still hidden underneath his smallclothes.
Thranduil easily shed his robe. Fili was built smaller and lither than Thorin and the blonde hair destroyed any illusion Thranduil might have wanted to indulge in but for a dwarf he was stunningly beautiful.
"What do you want me to do?"
Thranduil had waited for those words. "I want you to worship me."
/
"Would you like some wine?" Thranduil asked after he had invited Kili to his chambers again after the promised friendly archery match. Fili's fierce protectiveness of his younger brother last night had only whetted Thranduil's appetite for him.
"I…", Kili hesitated.
"Unfortunately we don't have ale. I have never found something to replace the beer brewed in Erebor", Thranduil said apologetic.
"I like wine", Kili offered. As if the stupid boy would have tasted anything but the plonk served in the village taverns of humans.
"Good", Thranduil smiled and filled his cup generously. His plan was set in motion, all he needed was Kili's cooperation. "Your skill with the bow is impressive. You must be among the most talented archers I have ever seen. Even the great Androg of the First Age couldn't have been better than you today."
Kili tried to hide his blush by drinking his wine which Thranduil quickly refilled.
"You look tense. Let me help you", he put his hands on Kili's shoulders and began to massage them. For a moment Kili tensed under his touch and Thranduil feared that he had pushed too far too soon but then Kili melted into his touch.
"You have the fairest hands", Kili said breathless tilting his head sideways towards Thranduil. His face was flushed, his eyes darker than usual and his lips slightly parted. He was ripe to be plucked, to be taken.
"You're too kind", Thranduil said, leaning slightly closer but not too close. He wanted Kili to make the last step.
"I am not", Kili whispered, his eyes fluttering close before he pressed his lips to Thranduil's. The kiss was clumsy but passionate and Kili was just as responsive as Thranduil had imagined him to be. Thranduil took great pleasure in taking him apart, making him moan and writhe underneath him. He submitted willingly, without a token of resistance even when Thranduil marked him, leaving bruises and bite marks for all the world to see and he begged more prettily than Thorin ever had.
Thranduil whispered sweet nothings and filthy words in his ear, called him pet names when he had Kili on his knees with his pretty mouth wrapped around him, and hurled insults at him when he took him on all fours.
The boy certainly never complained. He even encouraged Thranduil to sate his lust by moaning like a whore and begging to be fucked again and again until even Thranduil felt exhausted. He kissed Kili sweetly and told him to stay, to sleep, carding his fingers affectionately through the black strands.
He had arranged for Thorin to be shown to his chambers early in the morning and fell into trance imagining Thorin's face when he came in to see his favourite nephew, his son almost, deflowered by the man he hated most.
/
Thorin's face was better than anything Thranduil could have imagined. At first he looked disgruntled but Thranduil caught his eyes momentarily slipping down to his naked chest. He hadn't doubted it but it was nice to confirm that Thorin was still not immune to his charms.
Thranduil kept an eye on Thorin as he leaned down to wake up Kili who made a protesting noise in his throat. Not even Thorin's stoicism was strong enough to deal with the fact that Thranduil's bed mate was his younger nephew and the pleasure Thranduil felt from watching Thorin's mask slip up was greater than anything he had experienced last night.
"What is the meaning of this?" He demanded loudly.
Kili sat up, staring at his uncle with wide, frightened eyes.
"It merely slipped my mind how early we were meeting today", Thranduil said politely. "If you'd give us a moment", he gestured towards the door.
"I will not", Thorin was seething and Thranduil was enjoying himself immensely. He leaned closer to Kili and whispered, loud enough that Thorin would understand every word, "I regret sending you away this early. I more than enjoyed last night", while he was talking, his hand caressed the inside of Kili's thigh. A quiet gasp escaped Kili's lips when Thranduil wrapped his hand around him. Even in a situation like this he was delightfully responsive. "I will see you later", he added and pressed a kiss behind Kili's jaw, which was much more intimate than a kiss on the lips. Then he let him go.
Kili climbed out of the bed awkwardly since it was pushed next to a wall and he had to climb over Thranduil to get out. Then he gathered his clothes and got dressed, all the time trying to hide the effect Thranduil had on him. He shouldn't have bothered. Thorin only had eyes for Thranduil.
"You should be disappointed in your nephews, Thorin. They spread their legs easier than a whore", Thranduil said after Kili had left the room and closed the door behind him. Thorin's barely contained anger aroused him and he remembered what it felt like to have all that passion directed towards him. "They didn't even want payment."
"You will stop talking about them", Thorin gritted out between his teeth.
"You're still quick to make demands, especially when you have nothing to offer." Thranduil shifted, letting the sheets pool around his waist.
"I will kill you if you touch them again."
For a moment Thranduil played with the thought of putting Thorin in irons and taking him by force. All that fury would be delicious but then he discarded the idea. He liked his conquests to come to him willingly.
"Now I am frightened", he mocked and raised a leg so that the sheets outlined his desire. "I give you Fili. He's as cold and frigid like the stones your kind is made of. But Kili…I can see why he's your favourite. He reminds me of you when you were young. So passionate…so willing…but he's sweeter than you…sweeter than anything I have ever tasted. Why would I only play with such a thing once and then disregard it when I could take it whenever I want to until I tire of it?"
He had anticipated Thorin's assault. Thorin might be a warrior but Thranduil had size and experience on his side and pinned Thorin underneath him after a short struggle. He pressed his naked body suggestively against Thorin's.
"I will kill you", Thorin hissed. His expression spoke of pure hate and Thranduil relished in it.
"You know what I want, Thorin, King under the Mountain", Thranduil whispered into his ear. "The question is are you willing to give it to me for the sake of your fair and sweet nephews?"
"You have broken your word last time", Thorin spat.
"You will have to trust me", Thranduil's face curved into a smile against Thorin's cheek. "Or you leave with the knowledge that I will take your precious nephews again. I'd like to see how long it takes until Fili breaks that haughty demeanour and begs. How much do you think can I demean Kili before he says no? I bet that willingness to please goes a long way."
Thorin struggled underneath him. And Thranduil was so tempted to simply flip him over and have his way with him. It'd be glorious.
"What do you choose?" Thranduil asked. "Your pride or your loyalty?"
"My loyalty", Thorin said finally.
His triumph was complete. Thranduil let go of Thorin who looked tempted to strangle him right here.
"I wouldn't do that if I was you", Thranduil warned him. "If anything happens to me your companions are dead. And it won't be a quick death either. I am not the only Elf with a taste for dwarves. Especially ones as pretty as your nephews."
Reigning Thorin in with words was an even greater pleasure now that he was trembling with hate and impotent rage instead of desire. Thorin was taking his clothes off as if he was imagining them to be Thranduil's neck.
"Touch yourself", Thranduil demanded. "There's oil next to the bed. I didn't use everything on sweet Kili."
If looks could kill Thranduil would have been dead a long time ago but Thorin did as he was told.
"I wonder…has there been anyone since me? I doubt it. Your pride wouldn't allow you for anyone lesser than a king taking you on your hands and knees", Thranduil mused as he watch Thorin. He was not as cold and methodically as Fili had been but only because he was nearly boiling over with fury.
When Thorin didn't say anything, Thranduil said, "Answer me or fair Fili will be given to my guards for the night."
"No", Thorin gritted out.
"No…what?" Thranduil asked.
"There hasn't been anyone since you", Thorin said with so much hate that it made Thranduil shiver in anticipation.
"Good", Thranduil smile. "On your back. I want to see your face."
Thorin moved reluctantly, glaring at Thranduil the whole time, but he did as he was told.
Thranduil bound his hands to the bedpost with a silken scarf that still smelled like Kili.
"You know I took your nephew like this just a few hours ago", Thranduil said as he pushed into Thorin, who growled but wisely kept his mouth shut. "He was so eager and sensitive; I didn't even have to touch him."
Thranduil knew he had found the right spot when Thorin's eyes fluttered shut for a moment and his lips parted. Even Thorin couldn't command over his lust.
"Fili was more like you, but he also shares your weakness", Thranduil said and bit lightly into the juncture between Thorin's right shoulder and neck. The hitch of Thorin's breath was more exquisite than any music and his hands clawed at Thranduil's back.
"I took them right here where I have you now", Thranduil whispered into Thorin's ear between keeping biting and licking his sensitive spot and wrapped a hand around him. "And I will have them again, as often as I want to. I'd even let you watch."
Thorin was as beautiful as ever on the height of his passion. His blue eyes were open but unfocused, his head bent back and his mouth open in a silent scream. Thranduil watched him for a moment until his own lust overwhelmed him and he spent himself inside Thorin.
That night Thranduil celebrated his triumph with wine. He would call Kili to his chambers later and enjoy him again, maybe Fili as well.
By the time Thranduil made it to the cells, all the dwarves had escaped.