Chapter 19

Wade closed the door behind him looking over at Zoe leaning against the wall outside her apartment, her head down.

"Everything okay Doc?" he asked carefully moving hesitantly towards her.

"You weren't going to tell me you were leaving"

"To be honest, I didn't think you'd care – you haven't exactly been talking to me for a while" Wade explained reasonably.

"Why, do you care?"

"No" came the flat response from the downturned dark head.

"Zoe?" Wade said softly, close enough to nudge her in the stomach with the back of his hand. She didn't respond. His hand pulled back just in time to deflect a tear dropping towards the ground. It took him by surprise.

"Hey Zoe" he added gently "I guess it must feel like everyone is leaving you? Is that it? Is that why you're upset? You know, it's gonna take Lavon months to get his shit together – this whole plantation dream may never materialise" he added trying to comfort her. There was no response other than a hand raised to wipe away another few stray tears.

He reached out to her slowly and pulled her into a reluctant hug. Her arms did not engage, but she allowed him to rest her head limply on his chest. He began stroking her hair and took a moment to appreciate that he was unexpectedly getting to hold her one last time before he left.

Wade tried to take it all in for posterity – her smell, her size, her softness. He continued stroking her hair making soothing sounds. She was beginning to relax and her hands lifted to clutch the back of his t-shirt. He let out a deep breath, why did this have to be so wrong? It felt so good, so right.

Lost in his own thoughts, he didn't feel her hand leave his back and slip under his t-shirt until he felt it on his skin. Her first cautious touch had him on full alert. He felt nervous fingers begin to trace the contours of each rib and each muscle as they made their way up his back. Wade held his breath and tried hard not to get aroused by her touch. All he could feel was the heat left by the trail of her hand up his back.

"Zoe" he said huskily, trying to keep himself together "if you keep doing that, I am going to kiss you – and we both know that never works out well for us".

He felt her hand stop it's movement and curl into itself. He held his breath again until he felt her hand slowly uncurl and her fingers return to his ribs and stroke them slowly. A second hand was suddenly under his t-shirt and both hands were reaching up to his shoulders and feeling their way down again – this time hard and searching - trying to touch as much skin as possible. Wade let out a deep groan and lifted her easily up to his waist where her legs curled quickly around him. He pushed back her hair and holding the back of her head crushed his mouth on hers. She moaned as he pressed her against the wall beside her door. With a spare hand he reaching out to see if her door was open.

Within seconds he had carried her inside shutting the door behind him with his foot without losing contact with her mouth. He lay her down on the first surface he could find. The sofa quickly proved too awkward and they moved easily onto the floor as clothes were hungrily pulled and pushed off. All Wade wanted was to kiss her senseless – taste every part of her mouth before moving on to the rest of her body - but Zoe for once, was ahead of him and he suddenly found himself on his back with her on top of him and something else entirely happening. She broke contact with his mouth and for the first time that evening, looked him directly in the eye. He took in the raw expression in her pleading eyes - her pupils wide with lust and despair. He put his arms around her and pulled her back down to him to kiss her again, trying to be gentle – trying to take the sadness out of her eyes – before gladly giving in to what she obviously wanted to do.

He had held her so tight afterwards it was stifling. But good. It was so good to be pressed up against him, to feel his hands holding her there, to feel his occasional kisses on the top of her head. She didn't want to talk – she just wanted to lie here, her head resting on his chest, and listen to their breathing return to normal. She felt his breath rise and fall underneath her and reached out a hand to see if she could feel his heart beating. A hand came down on top of hers and the fingers entwined into hers.

X X X

They may have slept – in fact they must have, as her arm was completely numb when she came too and she was getting chilly. "Wade" she called quietly trying to extract herself from his hold.

"No, don't go, I like this".

"I'm getting chilly" Zoe explained.

"Oh" Wade responded "Here, put this on" and he reached over for his t-shirt beside him on the floor.

Zoe put it on slightly self consciously. Thankfully the apartment was reasonably dark – the only illumination being the glow of the city from the window.

She heard Wade sigh and tensed slightly. "Zoe, I think we need to talk" he finally said.

Jeez, why did he have to ruin everything. Couldn't they just spend some time together without him having to rub the fact that it was a one night stand in her face?

"Wade, you're leaving tomorrow" Zoe replied trying to sound indifferent. "We're probably never going to see each other again. I don't need anything spelt out for me – I'm a big girl".

There was silence for a moment while Wade contemplated her words. "Listen I may regret this in half an hour Zoe, but I want to talk" he finally decided.

"Sit up" he asked, quicky pulling on his jeans and getting up himself. He reached down to offer her a hand which she took reluctantly.

He positioned himself in the corner of the sofa grabbing a rug thrown on the back of it. He tried to pull her down beside him and wrap her in the rug too but she pulled away and sat further down the couch with her knees curled up in front of her. She took his offer of the other end of the rug which she managed to pull up to her chin while tucking the end under her feet.

"Zoe, we're gonna play a game" Wade explained calmly. "No, not that kind of game" he gave a short laugh as he saw the worried expression on her face. "It's called being honest" he paused "I think we need to try it..."

"We both get to ask the other three yes, no questions and we promise to answer honestly. See, it's pretty simple" he tried to nudge her with his foot.

Wade still remembered the last time he played this. An ex-girlfriend had forced him to play it and they had never got past her first three questions – she had broken up with him after question two. He had thought the game stupid but afterwards could see the benefit.

She looked at him suspiciously.

"Zoe, I'm about to get on a plane in less than 10 hours and I donno when or if I'm going to see you again and I don't want to do that with any mis-understandings or mis-communications or missed anythings between us" he explained forcefully.

"OK, I'm going first. I'll start you off with an easy one, just to get you into the swing of it – did you enjoy that?"

"One word answers?" Zoe confirmed.

"One word".

Zoe thought for a moment before she gave a careful "Yes". Wade shook his head - this was going to be a long game. He raised an eyebrow waiting for her to elaborate.

"You said only one word" Zoe explained in frustration.

"Jeez Doc do you have to make everything so complicated – go on then, forget the one word, just give me an honest answer" he groaned, equally frustrated.

"Well, yes but it was a bit intense and a bit sad, like we were never going to see each other again". She answered slowly looking at him to make sure he understood what she meant.

"well okay, we'll see if we can be a bit happier next time. Fine doc," Wade smiled "I understand what you're saying. Now next question - are you still going out with Justin?"

Zoe gave him a stunned look "We just had sex Wade – of course I'm not going out with Justin!" and she gave him a slap in the chest.

"Do you still love him?" Wade was looking at her carefully.

"No" said Zoe quickly and before he could react "and that was three questions so I'm taking my three" she demanded. Wade reluctantly conceeded.

"Do you have feelings for Leah?"

"Yes - she's one of my oldest and best friends – I love her to pieces" Wade replied easily.

Zoe seemed a bit shook by this admission "But you're not 'in love' with her?"

"No"

"And you've never kissed her?" asked Zoe suspiciously – Leah was gorgeous!

"Who said I never kissed her?" laughed Wade but seeing Zoe's expression he quickly elaborated "I haven't kissed her since I was fourteen and she asked for a lesson". He shrugged as if to say this was reasonable enough.

"OK, you're done, now back to me" Wade quickly took over "Why did you and golden boy break up?"

"That's not a yes/no question" Zoe replied trying to buy herself some time. Wade ignored her and looked at her expectantly.

Oh what the hell thought Zoe, he'll be gone by lunch time, "Justin thought that I fancied somebody else".

Wade took a moment to process this news. Who was it? "And did you?" he asked puzzled.

Zoe sighed. "Probably. Yes. Definitely".

"Which one is it?"

"Definitely"

"Who was it?"

Zoe looked at Wade. Was he really that clueless? She gave him an incredulous look and shook her head laughing. "Hey, was it me?" Wade suddenly realised but still seemed genuinely surprised.

"One, two three, yep, that's your fourth question. Sorry, my turn" teased Zoe.

There was something she wanted to know. She was pretty sure she wasn't going to like the answer but it had bugged her and hurt at the time - "So why did you run off that morning – after we, you know, after we first ..." she left the sentence hanging.

"You just left, like it was some cheap one night stand" she added bravely, quietly glancing over at him.

Wade was busy working a few things out. Mis-understandings seemed to be their thing. "Come here" he said softly, pulling her towards him.

"We could do this the long way" indicating back to where she had been when they were playing the game "or we could do it the short way. And my reckoning is that the short way could involve alot more sex before I have to leave you and go home to Bluebell"

Zoe looked at him confused.

"At the end of this talking thing, I need you to know a few things about me Zoe Hart. The first is that I like you, I really, really like you. You quite obviously drive me crazy in so many ways but I want to have you in my life. I think I may need to have you in my life. I'm going to leave you tomorrow but you need to be in no doubt that I want to see you again as soon as I possibly can. And when I do see you, I don't want there to be any mis-understandings or confusion about other guys or other girls, because that is just going to delay us getting naked, and me being able to kiss you, and touch you, and play out all the fantasies I will have had about you since I last saw you"

Zoe looked stunned. She tried to take in what he had just said. Wow, this honesty thing was awesome. She was pretty sure that that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said to her. She looked at him still shocked and reaching up, kissed the mouth that had just said those lovely things.

"Doc – this is when you say something back" Wade grinned, pleased with her reaction.

"'I like you too?" Zoe said carefully.

"Jeez Zoe" Wade snorted "that is pathetic. Is that seriously the best you can come up with?" and he burst out laughing.

"I'm not used to saying nice things to you" she pleaded "We normally just insult each other"

"But you like me?"

"Of course"

"And you still fancy me?" Wade teased.

"Obviously" Zoe answered "We're just been naked on the floor of my apartment"

"That don't mean anything Doc". Wade looked at her confused.

"Wade, stop – it does to me – and you know it" she said hitting him lightly on the chest.

"So you've got the hots for me" repeated Wade deciding that he wanted to milk this one...

"Wade, if you must know, I am permanently hot for you but one more word from your mouth and I could easily change my mind ..." Zoe threatened.

"Well, all right then" said Wade contentedly. "See, now we've got almost nine and a half hours before I have to get to the airport. You've got nine and a half hours to show me just how much you fancy me".

"You wish!" Zoe retorted.

"Oh, sweetheart, you have no idea ..." Wade replied happily as he lent in to kiss her yet again ...