"Merry Christmas, everyone," Phil Coulson said.

He moved out of the doorway, supported by a grim faced Maria Hill, but stayed there, as though not sure of his welcome.

The atmosphere in the room grew leaden, and there was an almost tangible moment where everyone in the room wanted to murder Fury. Tony was the first to recover, jumping up and going to shake Phil's hand. "Merry Christmas to you too, Agent Coulson."

"Phil," Pepper smiled, giving him a light hug. "Come in! Can I get you something to drink?"

Phil's polite refusal was followed by Steve, who shook his hand, then took his other arm. Hill flashed him a grateful look over Phil's head as some of his weight was taken from her arm. Gradually, the other Avengers ventured closer, until everyone but Natasha and Clint had acknowledged Phil. Steve and Hill were still supporting his arms, but he shook them off to look at the assassins, who were huddled together in the corner farthest from Phil. Their faces were impassive, but Steve got the distinct impression that they were holding hands behind their backs. Many guesses had been made as to how far back the history between the three went, the assassins and their handler, but Steve suspected that they hadn't even been close.

"Agent Hill, could I offer you some hot chocolate? In the kitchen?"

Hill smiled tightly, her own rage barely concealed. "That would be lovely, Captain Rogers."

"I think we'll join you," Pepper said firmly, getting a strong grip on Tony. The rest had caught on, and cleared out quickly.

There was absolute silence in the room for a few moments before Phil, now standing on his own, began to sway and grabbed for the edge of the couch.

"I'm sorry," he said quietly. "That doesn't even begin to cover it. I know. But for what it's worth, I'm so, so sorry."

Natasha stepped forward, her hand tightly interlocked with Clint's. Her fingertips ghosted over Coulson's face, her eyes showing none of the emotion she was feeling. Betrayal, sorrow, rage . . .Coulson had known that his 'death' would have negative impacts. This he had predicted. He turned around, trying to head for the kitchen, but staggered and fell. He tensed, waiting to hit the floor, but silently Natasha and Clint caught him, supporting him as Hill and Steve had done earlier.

The kitchen was full of hot chocolate and speculation, Banner's gentle rebuke of how it was none of their business ignored in favor of unraveling the spectacular drama playing out.

"I watched him die," Thor shuddered. " I do not understand how the Son of Coul remains alive."

"Neither do we, buddy," Tony muttered. "Unless, he didn't actually die. Fury used his death to pull us together, right? What if it was just one big act?"

"Do you know what happened?" Steve asked Maria quietly.

"I received a text this morning from Phil's phone," she replied, still radiating quiet anger. "I thought it was a horrible prank and went to investigate. I traced it all the way to a secret hospital room in the basement, where Phil was waiting. He said that he couldn't stay hidden any longer, that he was healed enough to go, and when I asked where, this is where he sent me."

"Jesus, Maria," Steve whispered. She inclined her head.

"I could kill Fury right now." Then Steve remembered that Phil was Maria's mentor, and he took her hand and squeezed it. She looked down at their joined hands for a long moment, then squeezed back, releasing a long sigh. "Merry Christmas to us," she muttered. "God damn, I need a strong drink."

"But then was he actually dead?" Tony still wanted to know, arguing with Thor and Bruce and Pepper.

"I was," Coulson said, and the kitchen froze. "For eight hours I was legally dead." Clint and Natasha deposited him in a chair before retreating again. He coughed, and Darcy handed him a cup of water. "I was in a coma for a month, and when I woke up, Fury told me what had happened.

"And the other four months?" Bruce wanted to know.

"For one of them, I was too weak to move. For the other three, I worked every day to get to where I am now." They all stared blankly at him, and Coulson sighed. Then slowly and still obviously painfully, he pulled his shirt up, revealing a long ragged scar on both the front and back of his torso. "Punctured my lung, ruptured my spleen, played musical chairs with a few other vital organs."

"Holy Thor," Darcy gasped, and Jane groaned.

"Darcy, that is not going to become a thing."

"Yes," Darcy insisted. "This totally deserves a Holy Somebody or Other."

Coulson's lips quirked in a thin smile. "Your eloquence is ever charming, Miss Lewis."

"Just cause you came back from the dead, Agent Ipod stealer, doesn't mean I won't tase you," Darcy threatened, but she and Coulson were both grinning. Steve thought that was a very excellent thing, because all the Avengers wanted nothing more at the moment than to murder Fury. Slowly and painfully. Darcy's levity might keep them from doing anything rash, if only for today.

"Why did you wait so long to tell us?" Tony asked.

"For the first two months I couldn't, and then Fury wouldn't let me. Said that I had already died once, and he didn't want me to reverse team bonding by showing back up."

"Fuck," Clint said angrily, and stormed out. Natasha paused long enough in front of Coulson to flip him off before following. There was another long, awkward silence. Maria squeezed Steve's hand again.

"Son of Coul," Thor said. "It is an honor to once again welcome you as a Brother in Arms. I am most relieved that my own brother did not kill you."

"Why thank you, Thor," Coulson said. Pepper insisted that Coulson and Maria stay for lunch. Coulson nodded gratefully, but Maria bowed out, saying that she had her own Christmas to return to.

Leaving Coulson in the kitchen, surrounded by Pepper, Jane and Darcy fussing over him and Thor and Tony laughing, Maria left, followed by Steve.

"Are you okay?" He asked as they entered the elevator.

"Yeah," she sighed. "Furious at Fury- that's nothing new. Not particularly looking forward to getting back to my family."

"Yeah."

"Oh! I'm sorry, Steve. I forgot. It's just, they can be a little much sometimes."

"Don't I know," Steve sighed, casting his eyes upward towards where he was absolutely positive at least five of the Avengers were plotting some sort of vicious retribution against Fury. "I'm going to be playing policeman for the next year, trying to keep them from doing anything especially terrible or illegal to Fury."

"Why stop them?" Maria asked, eyes flashing. "He deserves it."

Steve shrugged, allowing her to step out of the elevator first.

"Can I walk you home again?"

"Please. I need as much sane adult company as I can get before going over to my step mother's house."

Steve held the front door for her, and they stepped out into the street together. "Tell me about your family," he prompted, and Maria grinned.