Holy fuck, you guys. (That sentence started out not having a comma. You are welcome.) This is the single longest chapter I have ever written, standing at around 15.5k words. Tried to cut it down during editing and what did I do? I added more. Fml.

Anyway, this is the one that you guys have been waiting for: The Zoro Tree Meets The Strawhat Pirates. I would never fucking call it that because look at all that capitalization, but that's pretty epic, right? xD In any case, this was a pain in the ass to write, but I did for the love. I don't have money on my mind, money on my mind. I do it for, I do it for the love. Pardon my mental breakdown. I'll just be over here.

(edit: That was not in any way to indicate that this has ever been about the money, since I haven't made a penny off anything I've written, and I do not in any way own One Piece. Thank you for your patience. Enjoy.)

"Ne, Sanji," Luffy whined, grabbing just above the cook's elbow and shaking him roughly, "when are we gonna get to meet your new pet?"

Sanji had rolled his eyes so many times in the past few months, especially at his friends, that his eyes were sore from the effort. However, he thought he'd give it another go. "Luffy, how many times do I have to tell you? I don't have a pet, new or old," the cook said, short of temper and long of suffering. "I just don't want you guys messing up my house like last time!"

With a heartfelt groan, Usopp entered the conversation. "Sanji," he said, unreasonably indignant, "the last time we were at your house was, like, a year and a half ago!"

Nami and Robin agreed in their politely mild way, though not very subtly. "We miss your breakfast bar, Sanji-kun," Nami told him with a disapproving frown.

"My apologies, Nami-swan," Sanji cooed, just the slightest bit snappish. It had only been a couple of months since Zoro's first birthday as a human, middle of winter. He hadn't let his friends visit since a bit before Zoro became a human-at that time he had been too depressed to manage company-and after Zoro became a human, there had not been a time when he felt like explaining to his friends that his tree had evolved into a person.

Franky entered the room carrying six colas, handed one to Luffy, one to Usopp, one to Robin and sat down with the other three. "Yahh," he agreed vaguely as he cracked open one of his colas and took a series of large gulps. "Keeping us away from your place is not super," he finished with a nod connoting sagely wisdom.

An eternally startling high-pitched laugh broke out from the kitchenette, where Brook had been making some ancient tea blend at the request of the ladies for the past ten minutes. "Yohohohoho! Your use of that word amuses me to my very bones! Yohoho!" He sliced out of the kitchen, his nonexistent hips swishing as he carried an antique silver tray with an even more antique teaset and placed it haphazardly on the coffee table in front of the girls, somehow without spilling a drop. "However," Brook added, "I do agree."

Sanji barely stopped himself from heaving a sigh, fishing out the pack of cigarettes he'd bought that morning (which was already half gone). "Yeah, yeah," he dismissed roughly. He tapped the box of smokes against his palm a few times-a nervous move; he didn't mean to-and pulled one out.

"Please don't do that in here," Chopper piped up suddenly from his spot in the floor by Luffy and Usopp. The kid's approach didn't actually deter Sanji at all, but it was their apartment and Chopper was a sensitive little doctor and Sanji didn't want him to have an anuerysm, so he just tucked the thing behind his ear. Chopper was visibly relieved. With a nod of thanks, he went back to studying his book of obscure diseases.

"Cook-san," Robin began politely, crossing her hands in her lap, the cola Franky had given her propped up against her thigh, unopened. Sanji was ever-swayed by her neutral and polite tones, so he gave her his full attention. "Did you ever read that book I leant you?" she asked, dainty smile quirking.

The blond faltered slightly. There were a certain number of things he expected her to say, mostly along the lines of what the others were saying, but that wasn't one of them. "Yes? Of course I did, Robin-chwan, you recommended it to me. A lady as intelligent and insightful as yourself must know it was quite the page-turner."

Robin chuckled, accepting a steaming cup of tea from Brook with a vaguely apologetic look for Franky. She was never one to drink cola, but she did try to appease him when she could. Evidently, this was not one of those times. "I take it you enjoyed it?" she asked, inclining her head.

She was leading up to something, he could tell. She was always vague and, while her judgement was extremely good, Robin was also conniving. At this point in time, Sanji felt that she wasn't looking out for his best interests. Usually he would let her have her way without question, but he really didn't want to fall into that particular trap. Very much against his will-as he felt an obligation to do, not to want to-Sanji replied, "Yes ma'am, Robin-chan. It was a very good book."

The others in the room seemed to be pretending not to be listening, but of course they were, Sanji knew that. But if they were in on Robin's plan, it didn't show.

"I'm glad." Robin sipped silently, leaving a space in conversation that anyone who didn't know her would assume was the end. They all knew better, and most of them were annoyingly excited for what came next. Sanji was not amused. "I was wondering, Cook-san," she said mildly, "if I might stop by and get that book back."

Yep. She was beautiful and amazing and smart but she was the devil. Everyone else, Nami included, was easier to turn down, but Robin was unmatchably elaborate in her ploys to discover all his secrets.

The cook smiled at her tightly, trying to be as nice as possible. "I'm sure I could bring it to you sometime this weekend-"

"Oh, no need to go out of your way, Cook-san," Robin interrupted, some plastic version of concern filling her voice. Beside her, Nami was grinding her teeth. In the floor in front of them, Luffy and and Usopp were giggling and staring at Sanji with smug expressions. Even Chopper was giving him a pitying smile, while Franky and Brook laughed unabashedly. "Tomorrow is your day off, is it not? Nami-san and I were planning an outing near your neighborhood already, so we could simply stop by your apartment and pick it up at the convenience of all parties."

Brook's laugh escalated abruptly, easing the tension which Sanji guessed no one else was feeling. "Oh, are you two ladies going shopping? I could help you pick out some panti-"

"Throwing knives," Nami cut him off with a sweet tone and an evil grin. "We're shopping for throwing knives. And nightsticks."

Every bony inch of Brook seized and the deathly thin man gulped. Franky, Luffy, Usopp and Nami herself took that as their cue to lapse into stitches of laughter. "That's what ya get, ya old perv!" Franky announced, laughing heartily. He became suddenly serious a moment later and turned sharply to look at Robin, his absurd electric blue hair following his movement comically. "But, hey, if you are going panty-shopping..." He trailed off, snickering lecherously to himself. Brook quickly joined in his chuckling and Luffy and Usopp followed not too long after, less for the reason they were laughing, more just to laugh.

"Oi, oi," Sanji warned them, glaring for all the good it would do. He observed Chopper's flushed cheeks with gentlemanly appreciation. He was a good kid; that made one in the whole group, by Sanji's count.

"It would be awfully nice of you, Sanji-kun," Nami added, completely ignoring the detour in conversation. She leaned across the coffee table and put her hand on his, a distracting amount of cleavage showing. "It's going to be really cold tomorrow, so we'll probably have some cocoa while you're in the business of being a thoughtful gentleman." Her smile was too damn pretty not to be suspicious. But shit did it work.

"I- Well, I really am sorry, ladies, I just- I already have plans," he tried, the nervous bounce of his knee becoming extreme.

Everyone in the room barring the cook himself looked at everyone else in the room, searching. "With who?" Luffy asked, stricken with hurt. "Why weren't we invited?!"

"Yeah!" Chopper, Franky and Usopp huffed, pouting all in unison.

"It's a date, isn't it?" Brook leaned toward Sanji like he knew something and waggled his nonexistant eyebrows. "Is she pretty? Yohohoho! Of course she is! Now when can we meet her and more importantly may I see her panties?"

"Sanji, you have a girlfriend?!"

"Why didn't you tell us?!"

"You're putting us off for a girl?"

"Can we see a picture, please?"

"That's funny... I don't recall you having anyone special."

"She's super cute, right?!"

The cook had never had a claustrophobic attack before, but he felt like he was finding out very quickly what one was like. He jumped out of his seat and walked around behind the couch, did his best not to pace or hyperventilate, just to get out of the middle of everybody's scrutiny. He didn't know why it was so stressful for him-which was kind of a lie-but he didn't want them to know about Zoro. He felt like he was having a panic attack every day they grew more suspicious. But he couldn't give up the ghost; he wasn't ready yet.

"I'm sorry ladies, really, I just can't break my plans tomorrow," Sanji said, more pleading than apologetic and, as everyone broke out into complaints and questions, he fed them a hasty excuse about needing to be into work early and fled like the brave man he was.

oOo

Zoro hated being home alone. It was one of the worst things he'd had to endure a human, next to bodily functions and "the flu." He really didn't understand why Sanji wanted him to stay couped up all the time but it was getting old fast. And that was saying something when he'd spent the vast majority of his considerably long life watching the world move around him.

After years and years and years of not being able to go anywhere, and then what felt like a minute and a half of glorious freedom, that kind of solitude was too much for him. He rarely got to leave Sanji's home by himself which, though he didn't like to do things without Sanji, seemed like his only option, and on those occasions he had... Well. He didn't like to think about it. What was the word Sanji had used? Traumatic?

He sat against the wall by the door and sort-of slept, sort-of kept an eye on the clock. He still wasn't great with time (he'd demanded a break from the learning process when the only measurement of time that mattered to him was the rise and fall of the sun and moon) but he thought it had been at least a few hours since Sanji had left. However, the stupid clock said something closer to thirty minutes. Zoro hated that thing.

God, he was bored.

Sanji had said he'd only be gone for a bit, then he'd come back and they'd have lunch before Sanji had to go to the place called work. Zoro hated the work more than he hated the clock. Sanji was there too often and for way too long and he came home angry as many times as not and Zoro hated that too. He wished Sanji would listen to him when he told him to stop going there.

Zoro's legs were stiff and his neck felt like he wouldn't be able to move without breaking it and stretching in place wasn't working so he had to get up. It was difficult and he hadn't really gotten used to it, but usually Sanji would help him out if he was having trouble. Using the wall as unhelpful support was another reason why he didn't like being left alone. It wasn't fair that he-a strong and sturdy being of nature-had to have help, but he kind of liked Sanji's help and he missed it a little bit as he stumbled his way through the house.

He huffed in annoyance, looked at the clock and-had it really only been two minutes since he last checked? Damn.

Zoro wandered quickly through the apartment, once, twice, probably a third time but he wasn't really counting. He got himself some water and put on that warm shirt that Sanji wore sometimes just because Zoro liked it. (He'd told Sanji back when he first got it for Zoro that he would like it even better if it smelled like the golden-haired human; that turned out to be very true.) He paused in front of the bathroom, assessing the situation and, no, he didn't have to go in there, so he ducked into the bedroom and dropped himself face-first into the comforter. When he looked at the clock on the bedside table, it had only been five minutes since his last check. He hated waiting.

The former tree stared at the ceiling for a while, burying himself deep within the sheets and wriggling around until he and his nest met the floor with a poofy noise. The world seemed to cease around him, every noise muted, every bit of light dulled so he could barely see his hand in front of his face. He remained still so long that the awareness of his extremities started to slip away and he almost, almost found sleep again, before a thought passing idly through his mind jolted him right back up.

He could go find Sanji.

No, no, scratch that. He should go find Sanji.

It was so simple. He'd flitted over the idea so many times recently that when the fully formed notion hit him it was too strong a decision to fight. He would go find Sanji and that was all he could think about doing now, so he went. He stood up from his protective cocoon, grabbed his boots that Sanji insisted he wear when they went out, and charged at the door.

Only to stop with his hand on the knob.

It would be so easy to leave, to just walk right out, but it kind of took the breath out of him. It felt like a hell of a lot more than it really was and he didn't know what that meant for him, why it was. He could feel already that Sanji wouldn't be happy with him for leaving because he never was, even if Zoro's intentions were always, always good. He knew that, whether he found Sanji right outside the door or somewhere outside in the city, his human would not approve. Knew that they'd been down this road before and there was no sense going stir crazy because if he just told Sanji he wanted to go outside then he'd take Zoro and the two of them would have fun out there. But he did it anyway.

The door was easy, the hall was long, the elevator was a nightmare, but he didn't like taking the stairs. Sanji had to know a bunch of shortcuts or something, because when they went together it was a lot faster, but he still managed to make it to the ground floor all by himself so he wasn't totally helpless. The lady who was always coming to knock on their door and talk about her animals gave Zoro a weird look as he walked out of the apartment building all on his own.

About five steps later his pride and confidence simmered down and he hesitated, just a little bit. He didn't know where Sanji was-he didn't even know anywhere he might go. The city was still a mystery to Zoro, still too vast and strange for him to intuit where his one single human, no matter how shiny his hair, may be. He considered going back, ignoring the probing stare of the cat lady and running back to the safety of the apartment. But that was cowardly. He had endured much scarier things than this. Zoro continued away from home.

The noisy things called "cars" were less common in their area than others, Zoro had noticed, and he was very grateful for that because he still wasn't clear on where the human path ended and the car path began. Sanji always seemed to know, but it was hard to catch on to something so stupid. The cars, to Zoro, were a completely unnecessary species for humans to have. Apparently, he had thought many months ago, they don't understand what it is to be unable to move at all, let alone at their own will. When he'd told Sanji his thoughts on the matter a while ago, he'd had to argue also that trees did not need cars either, much to Sanji's amusement.

Zoro felt a tiny pain in his chest, something that felt like regret, but he didn't know why. He was sure he was doing the right thing. Yeah. At least, if Sanji got mad at him, he would tell him that; it had worked in his favor several times before.

People always gave him strange looks when he passed them and this day was no exception. The number of humans and animals alike that gave him crazy eyes, well, he couldn't count that high. But he ignored it for the most part. No one had ever said anything to him, not even to explain why they gave him weird looks, so it was okay. But, a significant number of minutes and a more than decent distance from the apartment, that changed drastically.

He'd been walking for a while, he knew that, and he was somewhere he didn't recognize, but he thought it was all the same. Everywhere people would just leave him be and he'd never have to deal with talking to them-that's what he thought. But a sapling of a human with dark hair, a weird mark under one of its eyes and a smile that made up half its face stopped before its foot touched the ground, plainly staring at Zoro. He couldn't tell, but he thought it was a male.

"Ne," the sapling uttered, stepping right in front of Zoro, "your hair is really cool. Why do you look so angry?"

Zoro was not skilled with conversation at the basest level, and that was not basic by any stretch of the imagination. "I'm not angry," he said shortly, frowning so the sapling knew he was serious.

The human sapling froze, then threw his head back and laughed. It was a very strange sound that made Zoro want to laugh along with it, although he didn't know why the human was laughing.

"You're funny! Hey, do you wanna be my friend?" The sapling clapped a hand on Zoro's shoulder, very familiar in a way that made Zoro vaguely uncomfortable. "It's okay if you don't, but I think you'd make a good friend!"

A warm and fluffy feeling like the feather pillows that Sanji liked started skipping around somewhere near his way-too-mushy center. He tried to stay strong-he did have a mission, after all-but the sapling looked so happy and friendly and inviting and Sanji had said something about strangers but he couldn't remember what and- Hell. He was a decades-old tree, grown up by human standards, if he wanted to, he could do anything. That was how things worked, wasn't it? He felt like it was.

"You're coming!" the sapling shouted before he could say anything at all. "That's great! Everyone'll be so excited!"

"I didn't..." Zoro trailed off when the young human clapped him on the back and hooked an elbow around one of Zoro's arms.

"It's this way! I just came from hanging out with them, they're gonna be so surprised!" The sapling beamed at him and without meaning to Zoro started walking with him. It felt like he'd known the sapling for a hell of a lot longer than their encounter on the street. If he really thought about it, the human looked a little familiar, too, but he didn't think it was possible that they'd met. "My name is Monkey D. Luffy, by the way. What's yours?"

Zoro hesitated. "...Roronoa Zoro," he answered slowly, thinking how Sanji would not like him using his first name. Maybe Sanji wouldn't like any of this, he thought. Maybe he should just go back home before Sanji realized he was gone and got mad. It's not like anything was keeping him from going back.

"Haha! That's a cool name! You'll fit right in."

But maybe he'd just hang out for a few minutes. It wasn't every day he got to hang out with humans.

oOo

"Zoro, I'm home!" Sanji looked over his shoulder one last time just to make sure no one had followed him. He thought Luffy had been on his tail, but he didn't see anyone so he ducked into his apartment and shut the door behind himself like monsters were after him. For a moment, he just stood there, resting his head against the door. It took him longer than it should have to remember that, had Luffy been following him, he would have beaten the door down already. God knows he'd tried enough times in the past year.

The cook turned his head without moving away from the door. "It didn't take as long as I thought, so we can have a longer lunch and maybe work on your spelling? I know you don't like it, but it's really not as bad as all that."

No answer. He must have been sleeping. Sanji had never met anyone who could sleep as much as Zoro.

With a smile that he could barely feel, Sanji pushed away from the door and headed to the bedroom. It was as common as not that Zoro fell asleep actually in the bed, but he figured it was a decent bet that he'd be in there, probably covered in pillows and blankets and balled up on the floor. He did that all the time-apparently he only slept in the bed when Sanji was there.

The door was wide open, so he could so he could see before he got there that a nest had been made on the carpet. He wanted to laugh every time he saw one of Zoro's creations; no rhyme or reason, just wadded up bedclothes, mixed with some pajamas or something because Zoro loved sniffing things and that was just so damn cute. He really started to feel his smile as he walked up to the nest.

"Hey, asshole, you're gonna be late for our lunch date," Sanji said with a chuckle, nudging the fluffy comforter with the toe of his shoe. Nothing happened, so he crouched down and poked at the pillow in the middle. "Oi, c'mon. Wake up, sleepyhead." Still no response. The cook might have rationalized that Zoro had been really tired, or maybe he was ignoring Sanji because he hadn't been in a very good mood for weeks, but that's not how Sanji took it. A pit opened up in the bottom of his stomach.

"Zoro?" The cook grabbed a fistful of blankets and, for a long moment, couldn't bring himself to do anything else. He took a deep breath, closed his eyes, and yanked the covers back. When he found the courage to open his eyes again, his heart sank. The blanket shell was empty.

"Zoro!" Sanji was shouting before he even stood up, looking around frantically in irrational places just to see if maybe he had missed Zoro somewhere. But the apartment echoed with his call and it felt colder by the second, empty, and fuck, Sanji couldn't even think what might have happened.

There was no note, he looked. Zoro didn't enjoy writing, or spelling, or words in general, but he'd left notes before for the few times that Zeff had come by while Sanji was out and taken Zoro back to his old living space behind the restaurant to cook for him. Even then, Sanji had had a heart attack and a half. But this? He couldn't even fathom it, let alone fully compute how fucking scared he was.

Zoro didn't know many places and there were even fewer he could successfully get to, Sanji was sure. The cook flung himself out the door and checked with the neighbors on either side of his apartment and across the way and none of them had taken Zoro in or even recalled seeing him that day. He took the stairs down to the lobby, talked to the doorman, but still not a clue where Zoro was. Sanji called his old man and tried not to panic when Zeff said he hadn't seen Zoro. He could have been anywhere with anyone, in any state and he had no idea. The only other place he could think of that Zoro might be was the place where he had grown up, that little empty spot in a sparse wood, but Zoro's sense of direction was so skewed that he couldn't reliably make it from one room to the next.

But Sanji had to try something.

oOo

"I'm home, guys!" The door slammed shut and everybody that was still there-Chopper had to go to school, Robin to work-looked up from what they were doing.

"That was fast," Nami remarked, setting down the magazine she'd been reading.

Usopp slapped his sketchbook down on the coffee table, pencil rolling off into the distance. "Did you actually get him?"

"Yohoho, I didn't think he would agree to come back," Brook announced, sipping his tea with a pinky out and then burping loudly.

"Yeah, it looked like he was in a super hurry," Franky agreed, opening his fourth cola in the span of half an hour. "But I never put anything past that kid."

The sound of unseasonal flip-flops echoed in the short hallway, followed closely by a thudding that didn't even remotely resemble Sanji's almost dainty gait, so either he was mad or-

"That is not who you went for," Nami stated for the lot of them, and none could get past that little nugget.

Luffy stood in the doorway, hand on one broad shoulder of a very tan, very agitated-looking green-haired man. The stranger didn't seem very patient; actually, Usopp thought he might snap and beat Luffy's face in with his own sandal, but the man wasn't objecting to being there. Well, his stink-eye was making Usopp wary-scaring the shit out of him, honestly-but Luffy wouldn't bring a murderous stranger to their home. Right?

"Oi, Luffy... did you just kidnap this guy?" Franky asked, because he was reasonable like that.

The raven-haired boy, always in good spirits no matter how suspicious the situation, threw his head back and laughed. "You're funny! I like that one," Luffy commended like it was a cool joke they just shared. "Guys, this is Roronoa Zoro! Zoro, this is Nami, Brook, Usopp, Franky... where did Robin and Chopper go?"

"Nice to meet you, Mister Zoro, yohohoho! I am Brook, or Dead-Bones, if you'd prefer." Brook bowed low at the waist and laughed his bizarre laugh for far longer than seemed strictly necessary in such an awkward situation. "Also, Miss Robin and the young doctor had work and class, respectively."

"Hold on, hold on." Usopp made a placating gesture with his hands, although no one was talking. "What's his name?"

Nami raised an eyebrow at him, manicured fingers tapping on her knee. No one else seemed to take special notice of him, but Luffy repeated obligingly; "Roronoa Zoro. Isn't that a cool name?"

"No, that's not- well, sort of, yeah, it is kind of cool, but I meant it sounds familiar," Usopp prattled, narrowing his eyes to get a better view of the green-headed fellow who was shifting awkwardly next to Luffy. "Really familiar. Have you guys heard that name before?" He was looking the man up and down, scrutinizing, but it wasn't coming to him. It would, though. He would remember where he'd heard that before.

Franky cocked his head exotically, lifting one crazy eyebrow almost to his hairline, examining Zoro from across the room. "Ya know what?" he said significantly, framing his chin with his finger and thumb. "I think I met a Roronoa up North a few years ago. Ya got family up there?"

Everyone looked to Zoro who puffed up and made a face like he'd caught wind of a bad smell. "No," he answered shortly and his voice was deep and annoyed and, yeah, Usopp was definitely scared of this guy.

Nami cleared her throat in a totally fake way that made Usopp want to laugh-but he didn't, for self-preservation reasons. "I've been up North, Franky, but I've never seen anyone with hair like that. Luffy, where did you find this one?"

"Who knows?" Luffy hopped off into the kitchen, still towing Zoro alongside him. "He's my friend now, so nothing else matters!" In the brief absence of Luffy's voice, Nami, Usopp and Franky exchanged glances. Brook sipped tea peacefully. "Do we have anything to eat? Zoro's starving!"

"I'm not-"

"Hey, cool! You guys saved us some sandwiches! Awesome!"

While Luffy and his friend were occupied, Usopp vaulted up to sit on Nami's left and Franky leapt over the coffee table to sit on the arm of the couch to Nami's right. "What do you think of this guy?" Usopp asked quietly, turning the hairy eyeball on the kitchen doorway. "Seems a little sketchy to me."

Nami snorted. "Have you seen the company we keep?" She gestured to Franky and Brook, then to Usopp's nose. "No offense."

"None taken," Franky said almost proudly, patting Nami's delicate shoulder with a very indelicate hand. "If you wanna know what I think, I'd say we have to wait and see about this guy."

The redhead gave him a calculating look. "That sounds like something Robin would say."

"Yeah, well..." Franky blushed, rubbing the back of his head.

Brook belched loudly out of the middle of nothing and set his cup and saucer down primly on the coffee table. "Luffy has good judgement. I believe we will like this man."

The room quieted guiltily until Luffy's reentrance with Zoro. "Time to bond!" Luffy announced with a stupid grin on his face and the gossiping trio felt worse when they saw Zoro shaking his head and smiling right along with him like this was old hat. He was going to fit in perfectly.

oOo

He couldn't find him, not anywhere. He was looking around like a wildman, asking every stranger that would listen if they'd seen a lost man with green hair. He'd gone to Zoro's spot and shouted for him, so many times, but he wasn't there. There had been no sign of anyone having been there in a while and that just made him more scared. He couldn't handle this. Sanji didn't know what he'd done to deserve the stress and pain he was experiencing, but he was extremely repentent and couldn't the universe just give Zoro back to him?

Sanji must have explored the entire town twice over, screaming Zoro's name and looking for him in every building he could get into. People were asking him what was wrong, yelling at him to quiet down, but he wasn't listening to them; not if they weren't Zoro.

Seven blocks from his apartment, two cops stopped him on the sidewalk and told him to go home, they would escort him, they said, and Sanji-knowing it would be impossible to explain to them about Zoro-told them he lived very nearby. He ducked into the motel across the street and waited, pretending to cut up with the desk clerk (who he assumed was going along with it, but the man was speaking another language) until the two cops finally left. He then bid the desk clerk goodbye with a few choice words and reentered the city streets with a glare for the general populous.

By the time Sanji made it back to his apartment-and he only did so for lack of other options-it was pitch black outside. He stank like he'd been swimming in slimy garbage and he kind of felt like it to. He'd searched every inch of the city, asked everyone that would listen if they'd seen his freak-of-nature boyfriend-his poor, un-streetwise, gullible, directionally challenged boyfriend-and there were no signs of him anywhere. He had half a mind to grab that bottle of scotch he'd been saving and drown his troubles and, goddamn, he almost did.

But he called his old man again-no luck; dinner rush-sat down hard on the couch and planted his face in his hands. "Zoro...?" he called out, or tried to, but his voice was broken from screaming all day and his words were distorted by the sob that rose up in his throat. "Please..."

oOo

"Ne, Zoro, you wanna stay over tonight? The couch folds out into a bed, and it only has a couple of loose springs!"

Zoro didn't recognize many of those words, but after all the time he'd spent getting to know Luffy and all his friends he was alright with at least the first part. "Sure," he said, "sounds fun."

"Trust me, dude, not as fun as it sounds." Usopp sat down next to Zoro, raised his eyebrows significantly. "Luffy sleepwalks through the whole apartment. It's gotten to the point where we've actually had to lock our front door."

That didn't sound like much of a hardship to Zoro, but they were such weird people. "I don't know what that means," he told them, refering to whatever words Usopp had been saying. Franky and Brook had left a while ago, and the woman, Nami, had retired to Usopp's bedroom with the command that no one bother her and a suspicious glare aimed at Zoro. He didn't much understand their customs or rituals or anything, but it was an interesting experience. He just wished Sanji was there to translate.

And Zoro's mood dropped like a rock.

It had been hours upon hours since he left the apartment, during which time he had heard numerous strange and funny stories and learned the dreams of all the wonderful humans he'd met that day. And of course he'd had fun. So much fun, and he wished he could hang out with those people again, but goddamn he missed Sanji. He was lost on half the conversation, still couldn't fully understand body language, and while these people understood him better than he thought near strangers ought to, Sanji understood him better than anyone. Sanji was his one true friend, his boyfriend, if he was remembering and using the term correctly. He really, really missed him.

"Hey, Zoro, are you okay? You look kinda pissed," Luffy said suddenly and Zoro was ripped out of his thoughts.

"I'm not pissed," he huffed, giving once more his "I'm serious" glare. Luffy laughed at him and sat down on his other side with a plate piled high in snacks. He didn't seem to believe Zoro, so Zoro glared a little harder. Luffy laughed again, mouth full of food.

"Whoa, chill," Usopp squawked, leaning away from Zoro and looking across him at Luffy. Usopp's face was really odd already, what with the branch coming out of the middle of it, but the expressions he made were even weirder. Zoro thought Usopp must be the strangest looking human he'd ever seen, even taking into consideration Brook and Franky with their peculiar human foliage and bizarre body types. He remembered a term Sanji had used once that seemed to fit; he was a "special snowflake."

"I'm not pissed," Zoro said again, scooting back into the pillows and crossing his arms. He hadn't slept in a very long time and he was really feeling it, but he didn't know how to sleep without Sanji there and he was getting the feeling that Usopp and Luffy wanted to talk more. Humans were so odd in their need for communication, but at least Sanji knew he had limits.

Luffy patted his arm. "It's okay, you don't have to be angry. Hey Zoro, what's your dream?" Luffy chirped casually and Zoro had no idea what to tell him. He had heard all kinds of dreams that day, but he could think of nothing in his own life that was similar to wanting to be the king of pirates or make a map of the world. Nothing he'd ever thought of seemed even close to that stuff.

Nothing he'd ever thought of by himself.

He already felt guilty for thinking about her again, because Sanji had a dream too, and it was perfectly nice, but he had never felt Sanji's dream like he had felt hers. When she had gone away, he kept her dream safe for her and vowed to pursue it in her stead until his consciousness faded-and then he woke up as Sanji's tree. As far as Zoro knew, he was the only one who still had her dream, who still remembered her. Of course he'd talked to Sanji about her a little bit, but no one could ever know her like he had. No one was left to fulfill her dream. No one but him.

"I'm going to be the world's greatest swordsman." His voice was stronger than he felt like it could be as he repeated her words and his chest seemed a little lighter.

He wasn't looking at them, but Zoro saw Usopp and Luffy exchange a very interesting look out of the corner of his eye. "Whoa," Luffy said and immediately began laughing. Zoro had half a second to think about whether he should be offended or not before Luffy added, "That's one hell of a cool dream, Zoro!"

"Yeah! Shit, now I feel a little lame!" Usopp announced, grinning and slapping Zoro on the back.

"You are lame, Usopp, but your dream is not," Luffy chirped and laughed again.

The two of them began to argue, which-Zoro was beginning to understand-seemed to be their only way of communication, but he wasn't really paying attention. Honestly he'd gotten hung up on that's one hell of a cool dream. He would never put it quite that way himself, but he felt the same. It was a cool dream. He'd seen her do it, watched the grace and concentration so close to his trunk and yet so unreal. He had loved when she practiced her craft-he didn't quite know what it was called, but he thought she had said swordsmanship-for him to see. He knew that she was far beyond him, more dexterous as a born human than he could even pretend to be, but he felt like he could do it. At the very least, he could try.

"Oi, Zoro, are you listening? You have got to show us your skills!" Usopp told him, standing and pulling Zoro up with him a little roughly.

"Yeah, come on!" Luffy hopped up from the couch and skipped into the other room.

Zoro watched the doorway for a second, then turned to Usopp. "What's going on? What are you doing?" he asked, standing completely still while Usopp tried to push him. Zoro gave him a look and the bizarrely long-nosed human stopped trying to move him.

"W-w-well, I was just gonna... I, uh, I'll just- Okay," Usopp muttered, putting his hands up and backing away. He wandered off and started pushing furniture around, giving Zoro a shifty look but still smiling a little. It was weird. "We just- Y'know, since you, uh, wanna be a swordsman-"

"The world's greatest," Zoro interjected.

"The world's greatest swordsman, my apologies-pleasedon'thurtme-uh, we thought you'd, I don't know, demonstrate?" Usopp was a very nervous person, Zoro had noticed. It was irritating to listen to him talk; only slightly less irritating than the scraping noise the coffee table made when he shoved it.

A door was flung open in the hall and Nami marched out, wearing an oversized shirt and what Zoro had to assume were just bare legs. It made him a little uncomfortable, but so did Nami as a person. "What the hell you guys? I told you to be quiet so I could get my beauty rest!" she snapped, as she had a tendency to do.

"Zoro's gonna be the greatest swordsman in the world, so we're testing him!" Luffy announced suddenly, appearing out of a different door than the one he'd originlly gone into, Zoro was certain.

Nami flinched at Luffy's loud voice and glared at him briefly before turning to Zoro. "You're a swordsman?" she asked, raising an eyebrow and looking him up and down. He didn't like that look. "Are you good?"

"The best," Zoro said without thinking. He didn't know what he was getting himself into, but he was starting to feel anxious. He wished Sanji was there to ease his nerves.

Usopp came over to stand next to Nami and the two of them stared at him for a little while. Luffy walked up to Zoro with something in his hand, but Zoro wasn't paying attention to him, because Usopp and Nami were eyeballing him and it was making him really uncomfortable. "Here," Luffy said, trying to hand something to Zoro that he was not going to take. "Guys, stop distracting him! This is going to be epic!"

The other two humans, who had been talking amongst themselves, jolted. They looked at Luffy, then at each other, then back again-human eye-communication was well beyond his understanding but that seemed a bit much. "We're watching," Nami told them after a second, waving a hand in their general direction.

"Yeah," Usopp seconded. "Take it easy on him, okay, Zoro?"

Uh, what? Zoro didn't know what he was talking about. Sanji knew how to enterpret weird human cues and translate for him; Zoro hoped Sanji would teach him that trick one day.

"Hey! I'm not going to lose! I took mixed martial arts for five days!" Luffy huffed. He grabbed one of Zoro's hands and placed what appeared to be a curtain rod in his palm. "But just in case, no headshots, mm'kay?" Zoro looked at Luffy and Luffy winked at him.

"Okay," Zoro found himself saying, flexing his fingers around the curtain rod. He noticed Luffy was holding a similar object and things started to click into place a little bit. They were going to fight, but not in a bad way, just like she used to fight with his neighbor trees. He could do this. "Okay," he said again. "Prepare yourself." He didn't know if he was talking to Luffy or to himself.

As they squared up-Luffy bouncing back and forth between his feet, Zoro just trying to remember how to hold a sword-Zoro wished Sanji was there.

oOo

When he woke up, he could not remember having fallen asleep. His lips were stuck together and his head was pounding and he kind of wanted to go back to sleep, but he just laid there on his couch, staring at the empty bottle next to his phone. It was still dark in his apartment, but he could see thin streams of light coming from the kitchen. Sanji thought he could smell depression in the air.

After a few minutes there, wallowing at the edge of his consciousness, the cook's phone vibrated. He tried to look at the screen without moving, but he couldn't see what had set it off. It took him a long moment to gather the strength to sit up. He didn't have it in him to move very fast or very far; all his energy was gone. So, so slowly, Sanji reached across the gap between couch and coffee table, picked up his phone and sat halfway up, supporting himself on his elbow. Two missed calls from his old man, three from Luffy, a dozen or so texts from Nami (apparently canceling her plans to drop by that day, but that's as far as Sanji read) and Usopp and Franky. Jesus. He just wanted to be left alone.

No, he tried to tell himself, that's not what you want. You want to find Zoro. And he did. There was nothing he wanted more than to find Zoro and figure out why he left and never let him go again, but he didn't know where to start. So, he listened to the messages from Zeff, still no sight of Zoro on his end, but he had looked and asked around. Sanji's heart hurt a little bit more, hearing about his old man's efforts. He would have to call and thank him later, but he didn't have the wherewithal to sound sincere right then.

The cook sat up all the way and took a few deep breaths. He pushed his hair around, tried to straighten out yesterday's shirt, but it didn't improve anything for his mood or his appearance. His mouth felt like it was lined in sludge and his head felt like he'd been styling his hair with a lead brick. Sanji turned the volume up on his phone and started one of the messages from Luffy while he padded into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water.

"Hey, Sanji, how are you? Sanji? Sanji? Hello? Oh, I get it, that was your answering machine! Hahahah!" The message ended. Sanji shook his head and filled his glass. "Oh, good, you answered this time! Hey, Sanji, you should come over. We're having a lot of fun! ... Sanji? Helloooo? Ohh, the answering machine again. Haha, it sounds just like you! Is that your voice recording? That's coo-" The second message ended. Sanji had downed his whole glass of water and refilled it. "Go, Usopp, go! Haha, I believe in you! Sanji, you should be here, we're having so much fun! Who knew sword-fighting was so fun, right?" Sanji nearly choked on his water. "Whoa, don't thrust so hard, you're gonna break something!" The message ended there. Sanji did not know how to process that information.

After a long moment spent staring down into his glass, Sanji decided he could call Luffy back after he found Zoro and figure out what that was about. First, he would brush his teeth and begin his search again. He had no clues, nowhere new to look, but he would try. He had to.

Sanji checked the front door-he'd left it unlocked last night, he thought-and it was still closed but unlocked. It looked like no one had messed with it. He looked around again for a note, checked every room for signs of Zoro and there was still nothing. He called Zeff to see if anything had changed but he got the answering machine, so he hung up. It seemed like the old-fashioned way was the only way.

He didn't spend much time getting ready for the day and it only occurred to him two hours after he left that he might be inadvertently ditching work. He called his old man again, Zeff answered and chewed him out, during which he learned that there was still no sign of Zoro. He tried not to throw his phone into the street. He just didn't understand. Where could Zoro be?

oOo

"Where the hell could he be?" Zoro grumbled to himself, stomping down the sidewalk with Luffy, Franky and Usopp close behind. He had had fun the night before-met new people, discovered a hidden talent for sword-fighting-but he was done now. He'd had an experience in sleeping on a creaky couch-bed with two other humans who seemed to sleep bigger and louder than anything should, and he'd experienced a "cereal" breakfast, which was not his favorite thing. It was really hard to eat and really cold and he really just wanted Sanji to be there because that would make him feel better.

"Who are we looking for again?" Franky asked but Zoro did not care to answer.

"Maybe Zoro has a brother?" Luffy suggested cheerfully. Zoro had a poor understanding of the meaning of that word, but he knew Sanji wasn't it.

Usopp scoffed. "Probably his bookie." Zoro didn't know what that meant, but he saw Luffy and Franky give him looks. "What? Everyone has a downside, I'm just trying to find his!"

"Not everyone has a downside," Luffy said, clapping Zoro on the back. Zoro could not be bothered to try and understand what they were talking about. He had contributed by telling them that he was looking for a human man with golden hair and eyes like clear, deep lakes, he was done talking as far as he cared.

There were not very many humans that looked even remotely like Sanji, but every one of them he saw made his heart skip a beat-only to drop when he realized it wasn't him. He felt so stupid for leaving their home, now that he couldn't remember his way back. He'd never thought that all the human buildings would look exactly the same, or that he would end up so far away. He may not have even thought at all; it sure as hell seemed like that, now that he was thinking clearly.

Zoro felt the horrid sensation he attributed to fear-he hated that feeling-and cleared his throat. He needed to calm down, prove his independence or some shit like that-he had new friends to be strong for. But he still felt terrible, and he didn't want to think about the stinging in his eyes.

oOo

Luffy had called again but Sanji let it go to voicemail. He didn't want to talk to anyone at the moment. He'd listen to the message if Luffy left one, and even that was only if he felt like it. He had been sitting on a park bench for some time now, head in his hands, staring at the pavement between his shoes and ignoring the very few people that passed by him. It was early afternoon, sunny as you please, birds chirping all around, and he just wanted to scream.

He had had a very finite number of good things in his life, which was, of course, tragic. However, when most every other good thing he'd ever had he'd lost due to no fault of his own, he had come to the conclusion that this one was his fault. He'd been hiding Zoro, keeping him for himself, hadn't even worked up the balls to tell his best friends in the whole wide world about Zoro. He was a terrible person, a worse boyfriend, and he knew it. He had run Zoro off by keeping him couped up for so long, and now he was all alone again.

If he could have a do-over, he kept thinking, he would have introduced Zoro to his friends a year ago. What had he been scared of anyway? That they would steal Zoro away? That they would judge him? Sanji knew his friends better than that. He was so stupid. He thought about it while he was sitting on that bench and he knew that they would have been hesitant on his behalf, but then they would get to know Zoro like Sanji had while he was a tree. Then everything would be perfect. All his favorite people, the ones he loved, would all know each other and get along.

Or, they would have. If he hadn't fucked it all up.

His phone chirped and Sanji reached for it immediately, wanting good news to distract him from the thoughts that made him want to do something he couldn't take back. It was a message from Luffy, predictable, but good enough, and he listened to it with slow, shaky breaths. "Hey, Sanji, it's me again! We haven't seen you in forever! This sucks! Anyway, we're trying to find somebody for our new friend! He lost a guy and we're looking for him, you should totally help us!" In the background, there was a noise that was quiet, and then louder. It sounded like someone was asking what Luffy said, but he couldn't be sure. "We're... About two blocks from your house, I think? You know, where that cool costume shop is? Right across from Brook? That's where we are right now! Come meet up with us!"

Sanji didn't have a reason to agree to help, but his reason to decline had run away. The cook decided after a few deep breaths that he would gather his wits and go help them. Maybe he would tell them everything. Maybe they could help him find Zoro. They were amazing, trustworthy people and he just wished he'd thought of it before he'd lost Zoro.

oOo

Luffy had made him stop looking and wait outside some stupid building and Zoro had no idea why Luffy thought he could do that, but he hated it. He didn't like being forced to do anything, but sitting still was a special kind of hell. Luffy said they were waiting on help, but it wasn't helping very much if they weren't looking for Sanji.

"Ah, here they are!" Luffy jumped up from where he'd been sitting on the pavement and Zoro took that opportunity to try and get away. Unfortunately, Franky was right there, blocking his path.

"What's the emergency? Is someone hurt? Do we need to call a doctor?!" a small human squeaked, bringing his attention back to the current situation. The little human was only about half his size and red in the face and he couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl. Then again, he was horrible at those things.

"Chopper, this is Zoro! We're helping him find someone," Luffy introduced like it was very normal. The tiny human, Chopper, did not share his calm attitude.

"I- huh? That- I left class! I thought someone was dying!" Chopper shouted, waving its arms around. "Luffy, you really scared me!"

Luffy just laughed at his outburst while Usopp responded, "To be fair, a missing person is kind of a big deal." He didn't seem to be very worried, just like Luffy. That made Zoro a little angry.

"Yes, well," Chopper said huffily, looking at Zoro for the first time. Its miniature glare faded somewhat. "Nice to meet you, Zoro." Chopper looked at him strangely for a moment, shaking its head. "Dammit. You look really upset. I guess I'm already out of class..."

"Prioritize like a man, Chopper! This is super important, and you're basically a doctor already! You'd learn more out here!" Franky boomed, dropping a heavy hand on Zoro's shoulder. He didn't understand what was happening, not really, he just wanted to go find Sanji. Weren't they supposed to be helping him?

Chopper started to say something and Zoro tried to wiggle away from Franky as the redhead from the previous night strolled up. "Well, I called in two and a half favors to be here right now, so this better be goddamn worth my while," she said mildly, grinning at Zoro in a way that made him very uncomfortable. "I expect my weight in FroYo."

He was so dumbfounded that he accidentally responded; "I don't even know what that means."

"Aww, honey." She touched his face-he flinched away, almost smacked her hand-and pouted at him. "You will. Anyway, what does your friend look like?"

"He said, and I quote, 'he has golden hair that glows in the sun and eyes deeper and bluer than the sky,'" Usopp interjected, speaking strangely and gesturing widely so that he almost whacked three different people.

The redhead-he couldn't quite remember her name, something with an N-raised an eyebrow. "Mmm, poetic. Sounds to me like you've spent a lot of time thinking about your friend's eyes." She hooked her elbow around Zoro's arm and he barely fought off the urge to gag. "Tell me more about him."

"I don't think the young man wants to answer you, Nami-san." A woman with dark skin and darker hair walked right up behind Zoro to stand next to Franky. "Hello everyone," she said to the group in general. Then, to Zoro, "I'm afraid we haven't met. My name is Nico Robin, but you may call me Robin. Am I to assume you are the talented Zoro-san?"

He did not even come close to knowing that woman and it creeped him out that she already seemed to know him, though he couldn't think how. Zoro tried to get away from the two females, but the little redhead-Nami, was it?-was surpisingly strong.

"Shishishi! I can tell you guys are gonna be great friends!" Luffy laughed and Zoro grimaced. "C'mon! Brook's teahouse is right over there, we can get him and get back to our search. It's very important, right Zoro?"

Zoro had been seconds away from storming off and he was still considering it, but Luffy had a look. A weird, smilingly serious look and Zoro felt like Luffy really wanted to help him. Like he was really trying and their little hold up would ultimately aid Zoro's search, even though it had felt like maybe he was trying to keep Zoro from finding Sanji. There was so much hope still. He could almost picture everything working out. He could find Sanji; he just needed to accept his new friends' help the way it was.

"Very," Zoro said after a moment, "very important."

"Then let's go!"

"Yeah, what are you waiting for, slowpoke?"

"I have some suggestions as to where we could look."

"If we're splitting up, I want Robin on my super team!"

oOo

Sanji must have emptied two whole packs of smokes on his way to Luffy and his new friend-in-need. Chain-smoking wasn't a good habit to keep, but his fingers itched and he had nothing better to do. He looked around at all the people he passed, skimming the crowd for patches of green. No one stood out like Zoro did. Every minute he couldn't find Zoro, he learned a new low.

It was all he could do to keep it together. Sanji just wanted to lie down somewhere and never get back up. He could never be the same after this, not ever. He had known happiness and he'd fucked it up, multiple times even, and he should have seen this coming. Every relationship had troubles, but he had foolishly assumed that theirs were over, or at the very least would be easy. God, he was an idiot. He could see it all so clearly, now that he was looking back at a mistake. Everything seemed so simple when he couldn't go back and do it over again.

The cook scrubbed at his face with both hands, trying to stop himself from getting worked up. He didn't feel any better for it, but he had apparently developed an aptitude for lying to himself so he soldiered on.

He was hard-pressed to remember where the shop was that Luffy had been talking about, but he knew where Brook's teahouse was and that was nowhere near his apartment. He thought that it was on the same side of town as his old man's restaurant, where Sanji used to live. That was probably what he meant, Sanji decided, especially considering he'd only been to Sanji's apartment about three times since he'd moved in. And those visits were damn near two years ago.

On his way to the meeting place, Sanji found himself thinking about the last time he'd had any of his friends over-a Halloween party a few months before Zoro became human, if he remembered right-and how fun it used to be. How they would all just hang out and crash whenever, wherever, and talk about stupid stuff. He remembered giving and receiving advice and everyone sharing everything; he remembered the day he'd first told them about his tree named Zoro; he remembered now how they were all so excited to see if it worked.

Since he seemed to be in the business of making himself feel worse, Sanji thought back to the one and only time he had brought anyone to see the Zoro tree. It had been a few months after he'd started visiting Zoro on the daily, and he'd brought Usopp, Luffy, Franky, Nami and Robin with him. They hadn't met Brook yet, and Chopper had been too young to go without his grandparents' permission. For the longest time, he'd thought that they had been rude and judgemental that day, that they thought it was stupid to care about a tree, but he wasn't so sure now, about a decade later.

They'd all climbed on Zoro like a regular tree; he'd had the lowest branches in the woods. They all had hung out and talked and Sanji had felt so judged. He'd nearly had an anxiety attack that day. But when he really thought about it, no one had had anything other than positive things to say about Zoro, they admired his moss and said it was weird but cool that Sanji was so invested in a tree. He had latched on to the weird part and completely ignored the part where they understood and accepted him and his weirdness. He was such a horrible friend.

Sanji almost walked out into traffic, so distracted was he by his blindness. He nearly missed two different turns, and bumped into a skateboarder, but the guy didn't fall so it was okay, and it didn't matter anyway. There were so many wrongs to right, and so little time. If he could just have one do-over, he would make the absolute most of it, but he didn't have that luxury. He didn't have anything. He'd abandoned his work, alienated his friends and lost his one and only love. All the chances in the world, and he'd missed every one of them. God, he felt like an idiot.

The cook found himself at the costume shop in a matter of minutes, much faster than he was mentally prepared to be there, but apparently it didn't matter. No one was there. He expected at least three of his friends (because they never really traveled alone) to be waiting, since he'd assumed that was the meeting point, but the sidewalk was full of strangers. It was a little confusing, just for a minute, and then-

"Hey, Sanji-kun! Over here!" Nami shouted and waved at him from down and across the street, in front of Brook's teahouse-Chai Bones, it was called-with Usopp, Franky, Robin and Chopper.

He crossed the street as quickly as possible, trying to think of what he could say, how he could possibly atone for his actions, or lack thereof, towards his friends. "Guys, I'm so, so sorry," he began, but he was cut off as Chopper hugged him and Franky clapped him on the back.

"We're already past it," Usopp told him, waving it off and sticking his nose up with a grin to demonstrate how over it he was.

"Bigger things, bro," Franky added, waxing poetic by the look of him. "We've got an important mission."

Sanjiblinked, wondered how he could really respond, and found himself saying, "So I heard."

"It's so sweet, isn't it? His story is almost romantic!" Chopper cheered, squeezing Sanji's torso once and then skipping back to go talk to Nami about how romantic it was.

"We are just waiting on Luffy-san and our new friend to get Brook, and then we will begin the romantic search," Robin explained, gesturing gracefully at the entrance to Chai Bones.

"Okay," Sanji responded vacantly, as the group molded around him like they'd never been apart. "I didn't know this was a romantic search," he told them stupidly. He hovered between Nami and Usopp, where he fit like a glove, but it felt strange. New and different, but the same, and it wasn't all good. He had so much to say to them-all of them-and he thought about saying it then. The time didn't feel right, not quite, but it never would so he needed to just grow a pair and start talking.

"Something wrong?" Franky asked, cocking a crazy eyebrow and tilting his head until his ear touched his shoulder.

The cook glanced down at the sidewalk, toeing a crack in the pavement. "Well... Yes. I- I have something to... to tell you all." He looked back up and half of his friends were looking at him, the other half at the teahouse entrance. The door opened outward, but he wouldn't be deterred. He had to say this. "The thing is..."

oOo

When they came out of the strange building, Luffy and Brook still talking about meat flavored tea, Zoro was lost in thought. He had followed them out, wondering how long it might take to find Sanji now that he had so much help, and he hadn't been paying much attention to everyone that was waiting outside. Really, he just wanted to get going, but he bumped into Luffy on their way out the door and he had to look up, maybe to be annoyed, maybe to see what was going on.

"I have something to... to tell you all."

The voice was familiar, so familiar, and he turned his ear towards it.

"The thing is... I kind of..."

"What is it, Sanji?" Luffy asked, too loudly just in front of Zoro and the former tree snapped to attention so quick he almost didn't realize he'd done it.

Standing there on the sidewalk, looking down at his shoes, was his human. It was the sorriest Zoro had ever seen him look, so fidgety and defeated, and he wanted to ask why, to know all the details. Heat extended from his chest, first up into his face, then into every limb and Zoro had forgotten somehow, until he felt the heat in his eyes, that the blond was all he needed to know. His breath wheezed out of him, and with it came his name; "Sanji... Sanji!"

It didn't occur to him until one blue eye locked with his that Sanji might be upset that he left, that he might not want him anymore, and that thought made him shake with a dry sob. As a tree, Zoro had always been aware of the world's rotation, every being of the vast population was in constant motion. But now, as he stood there in a human body staring into the eyes of the only person that really mattered to him, everything seemed still. Outside of Sanji, there was nothing, but even though he was there, it was almost like he wasn't. He wasn't saying anything. He didn't blink. Zoro couldn't even tell if he was breathing.

"Sanji...?" he tried again, finding his arms lifting themselves just a little. He kept waiting for Sanji to do something, to tell him it was okay or it wasn't. He watched as, at last, Sanji's chest heaved once, but he still didn't blink. He just stood there. "I'm- I'm sor-r-rrr..." Zoro's words were being cut off from him. It was so frustrating, so hopeless. The human reaction was to cry and he wasn't fighting it well.

And then Sanji took an unsteady step forward. He looked like he was having trouble getting his hands out of his pockets, but when he finally succeeded, he reached out. "Zoro?" Sanji's voice shook and he took another shaky stride towards him and Zoro wanted to meet him in the middle, but he forgot how to walk. He didn't even know how he was still standing. "Zoro..."

"I-Iyum- I-I-I am... sore-sorry," Zoro stuttered badly, his speech failing him just like the rest of his functions. He was only vaguely aware of his limbs, sticking his arms out in front of him trying and failing to reach Sanji.

But when Sanji grabbed his hand he felt it everywhere. He couldn't tear his eyes away from Sanji's to look at the join of their hands, but he could feel the heat of his touch burning its way up his arm and throughout his whole body. "Zoro," Sanji whispered again and Zoro's heart hurt because Sanji wasn't saying anything else.

"I-I-I'm so-o-o... sorrrry," the former tree tried once more, but it was no use. He was too frustrated for it to work and-

Sanji yanked him into an embrace that Zoro was fearful about at first, but he had only been hugged like that a couple of times in his short human life. The golden-haired human kept trying to pull him closer but Zoro didn't know what to do, so he stayed completely still. Somehow, he had handfuls of Sanji's shirt underneath his coat and he was pulling without trying to.

"I'm sorry," Zoro said again and the words bubbled out like it was nothing.

"Stop it," Sanji laughed into the side of Zoro's face, but he didn't sound very happy. "Zoro, just stop, okay? I can't listen to you apologize when I'm the one who messed up." Zoro squeezed his eyes shut and tried to argue, but it didn't work. He was too caught up in the smell and the feel that it just wasn't possible for him to concentrate enough to speak. "I am sorry. I just wanted to keep you for myself and I don't agree with your methods but I... I just missed you too much to call this anything other than my fault."

Zoro hated to cry, it was annoying and, although it was to relieve pain, it was painful. It was horrible to watch, horrible to experience, but there was nothing else he could do. "I'm so... so sorry," Zoro sobbed, and it was muffled by Sanji's jacket, but he knew he'd been heard when the golden-haired human laughed again.

"I know, just- Just stop." That time, when he spoke, he sounded a little better. Sad and broken-which Zoro knew he had caused and he felt so, so bad-but better.

They'd barely separated enough to look each other in the face when suddenly, like a bomb going off right next to them, Luffy's voice breaks their solitude; "Oh, do you guys know each other?"

And then Zoro and Sanji, still wrapped up in their own little bubble, were surrounded by Luffy, Nami, Usopp, Chopper, Robin, Franky and Brook. Along with so many other people passing by on the streets. They were being watched by more people than Zoro was enitrely comfortable even being around and it made his face feel hot.

"Fuck," Sanji breathed into Zoro's ear, lowering his head like he was trying to hide behind Zoro's face.

"I'd say they do more than just know each other," Nami said, her voice a little too deliberate for Zoro's liking.

"Yeah, are you guys friends?" Chopper asked, smiling up at them. That sapling was the exact opposite of the redhead and the contrast made Zoro want to laugh a little, except that they were in a much more tense situation than all that.

Zoro wiped the wetness off his face on Sanji's shoulder, then straightened up. He didn't know how to act in this singular event, but the vibes he was getting from Sanji really weren't making it out to be easy. "What... do we have to do?" Zoro asked Sanji, because he didn't even really think they needed to do anything. He'd found Sanji, and that was all he'd thought he needed to do.

Sanji sighed and separated himself from Zoro for the most part, just holding on to his hand. "We have a lot to talk about guys," Sanji said. He wasn't looking at anyone, so Zoro was left to assume he was talking to everyone. "I'm... really sorry. Uh, that I haven't said anything until now."

"Oi." Zoro squeezed his hand and when Sanji looked at him, he appeared to be getting a little misty-eyed. Zoro didn't like the way he was talking and acting, like Sanji thought he had done something wrong.

"What do you mean? You've said lots of things, Sanji!" Luffy laughed.

"That's not what he's talking about, Luffy," Usopp said, shaking his head and patting Luffy on the shoulder.

Franky took up beside Usopp, shaking his head as well. "Damn, you're clueless."

"Don't be rude, now," Nico Robin told them, and Zoro felt Sanji shift next to him. "Unless, of course, either of you saw this coming? I, for one, am pleasantly surprised."

The long nose and the giant stopped their carrying on, looking a little guilty. Nami, who was on the other side of Sanji and Zoro, away from the other two, rolled her eyes. "Oh, please, I saw this coming a mile away!" she was saying, but Zoro wasn't listening to her.

Next to him, Sanji was shaking. Zoro looked at his human and before he could process what he was seeing, Sanji rested his forehead on Zoro's shoulder. He didn't know what was going on, but it was apparent that Sanji wasn't handling it well. Zoro hadn't spent much time imagining their reunion while he had been looking for Sanji; however, he had pictured something better than this.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Chopper asked as Zoro pulled Sanji into his chest and hugged him.

"Oh, dear," Brook muttered behind them.

All the humans he'd met not even a whole day before-people who he could only assume were Sanji's friends-were talking, trying to figure out what was going on. Zoro didn't know what to tell them and, honestly, he wasn't sure he wanted to tell them anything. Sanji obviously didn't know how to handle things right now, and Zoro couldn't do it without him.

"I'm sorry," Sanji said into Zoro's shoulder, so muffled he almost didn't understand.

"It's okay," Zoro told him, but he wasn't sure. Sanji was shivering and Zoro couldn't see it, but he thought Sanji was crying too. He realized, then, that he himself had stopped. "If it's not," Zoro went on, "then it will be. I promise."

"So, you two are, like, in love?" one of the humans asked, but Zoro didn't care enough to figure out who.

"Yes," Zoro said quickly and unabashedly. Sanji sobbed once into his shoulder and hugged him tighter, and somehow that made Zoro feel like there was more to say. "And if that's a problem-"

Several high-pitched happy noises cut him off, and Zoro turned his head to see more smiles than he'd ever seen in one place before.

"Are you kidding?" Luffy asked, flinging his arms around Zoro and Sanji both. "That's awesome! You guys are like the coolest people I know!"

Usopp and Franky made weird noises and Usopp said, "Hey! No offense Sanji, Zoro, you're both great, but I am clearly the coolest!"

"Pssh," Nami scoffed, flipping her hair over her shoulder. "They are way cooler than you, and I am even cooler than all of you combined."

"This is hardly the time for this argument," Chopper scolded and Zoro heard Sanji laugh once. Zoro smiled a little. "I am very happy for you two, no matter who is the coolest," the little human added, stepping up and smoothing one hand down Sanji's back. "You don't need to be scared, okay?"

It hadn't occurred to Zoro that Sanji would be scared. He still didn't know why, but if that was the case, he wished Sanji knew that Zoro would protect him.

"I agree with the young Doctor," Nico Robin said in her eerily soothing voice. "It is wonderful that you've found someone, Cook-san. The strained flirting was hard to watch."

Sanji stiffened in Zoro's arms and Zoro was sure that woman had said something to upset him further, but then Sanji turned his head. He sniffed and swiped at his face, looking away from everyone, and all the while Zoro swept his hair out of his face with one finger. "What- what did you say?" Sanji asked. His voice was shaky, his breath warm on Zoro's neck.

Everyone stopped moving suddenly and Zoro eyed them all one at a time. Robin cleared her throat quietly, catching Zoro's eye with a nod. "I said that I am happy for you," she stated slowly, looking right at Zoro, even though he thought she was talking to Sanji. "Additionally, when you would flirt with Nami-san or myself recently, it was fairly painful to witness. Your heart was not in it."

"That was a little suspicious," Nami mumbled and trailed off immediately.

"Ah, I, too, had noticed this," Brook said loudly and without warning. "It was a bit of a disappointment, I must say, when I lost my only competition. However, I wish you every happiness with your mannish lady friend." The tall, skinny man-who, Zoro was realizing not for the first time, did not make any sense when he spoke-removed his hat and bent dramatically at the waist.

"Dude," Franky gasped, "that's a woman?! Shit, Sanji- Bro, it'd be better if this was a guy!"

Zoro wasn't following the conversation, but he heard Sanji chuckle, so that was all that mattered.

"Whaaat?!" Chopper and Luffy looked at Zoro, then at each other. "I-I thought you were a boy!" Chopper squeaked in astonishment, looking at Zoro like he'd hung the moon.

Sanji laughed again, more than one little burst, and Zoro felt a grin come upon him. The golden-haired human started to pull away from him, just a little, and Zoro let him. Just in case, he kept both hands on Sanji, one on his arm and the other in the middle of his back.

"Please tell me you're all kidding?" Nami asked, putting a hand on her head. "Because if you're not, we have bigger issues to be discussing than Sanji's boyfriend. Which, by the way, I am totally for. As long as you still cook for me, anyway. You will, won't you, Sanji-kun?" The orange-haired human made a weird face, like she was kissing the air, and it looked disgusting.

"Of course," Sanji said, "I'll cook for everyone. It'll be easier, now that I've gotten my ass off my shoulders..."

oOo

The blond listened to his friends go on and on about how okay they were with him and Zoro, how much fun they were all going to have. He listened to them rave about Zoro over several cups of tea in Brook's teahouse, how they had all met Zoro the day before and had an awesome sleepover. He sat with his chair right against Zoro's chair, never completely letting go of him, for however many hours they all sat around and talked and accepted. It was all well and good for everyone else, and of course Sanji appreciated it, but he just needed to take Zoro home. Every minute that passed he had to move physically closer to Zoro just to keep it together.

When they finally got away from everyone else, Sanji wasn't even sure how he managed to get both him and Zoro (who kept trying to take all the wrong turns) back home, let alone in one piece. No sooner was the door locked behind them than Sanji attached himself to Zoro and held on for dear life.

"Hey," Zoro grumbled, pushing Sanji back just enough to kiss him. "It's okay," he said, and kissed Sanji again, "everything's okay."

Sanji could see in Zoro's eyes that he still didn't think Sanji had anything to be sorry for, but he really, really did. First, keeping Zoro all to himself for two damn years, isolating him to the point that he ran away from home. And then when Sanji finally found him after the longest day of his life, after giving up on Zoro, he tried so hard to handle it perfectly, to explain to everyone what happened, and he couldn't do it. It didn't matter that Zoro told them in Sanji's stead. It was amazing and wonderful, but Sanji was supposed to do it. That was how he was going to make things right, and he had choked on his own emotion and couldn't do it.

"I'm just so sorry," Sanji told him again, feeling his shame forming a lump in his throat. "I could've... done so many things different, and... I'm really sorry, Zoro, that this had to happen."

Zoro squished his hand over Sanji's mouth like a child and pinched his cheek. "Shh, shut up," he muttered, bringing his head in close. "I'm tired of hearing it, okay? You told me something once- something like, it doesn't matter how we got here, if the end is good? Well, we're here. Everything's okay. Better, even, than before. We have friends... We do. And I'm sorry, too."

Sanji fought the urge to lick Zoro's hand, instead just nuzzling into it. It was in his nature to want to say something, to add his two cents, but he decided just to wait and let Zoro continue. He didn't want to hear him apologize anymore-his apology in front of Chai Bones had been heartbreaking enough for a life time. However, he was proud of the man Zoro had managed to become in 2 years' time, and he owed it to him, after everything he'd put Zoro through, to be patient and just listen.

"You know," Zoro said after a deep breath, "I thought I knew love. With her. I thought that was as happy and as h-hurt as I co-could be..."

The cook frowned and almost bit his lip, before he remembered Zoro's hand was there. It was hard to listen to Zoro talk about his first human, his first love, Kuina. He was always affectionate when he talked about her, always emotional, and it hurt. But, Sanji just rested his forehead on Zoro's shoulder and listened anyway.

"And it was love," the moss-headed man continued almost inaudibly. "I l-learned that tod-day... I al-so lear-learned that, there a-are diff-differ- ugh... different... kinds... of love. Th-ose h-humans, they- they are your f-f-riends, riiight? Th-the ones that I-I m-m-met wh-when I w-was s-s-still a tr-tree?"

Sanji did not know where he was going with the one-sided conversation, but he nodded anyway.

"Well, they're... n-nice. They w-were an-noying back th-then, b-but n-n-nice. I d-don't know a l-lot of h-heyoo-shit-humans, but... I know that... Our si-si-situation is s-strange... And y-you seemed to th-think that th-they would... n-not un-derstand... And they d-did. S-so I kn-know that th-they are good. I l-like them, Sanji..."

That was all well and good in Sanji's opinion, but the stutter was starting to confuse him. He didn't know if Zoro had reached his point or not, but it didn't make sense for him to be so nervous that he couldn't form a full sentence at a time.

"I'm glad you approve," Sanji told him honestly, after moving Zoro's hand and taking a step back to get a good look at Zoro's face. The former tree looked confused, but very serious (which, now that Sanji thought about it, was always true of Zoro when he was confused) and his face was slightly flushed. "Is that all you wanted to tell me?" Sanji raised his eyebrows and hoped it wasn't.

Zoro frowned and the crease between his eyebrows became very intense. "No... No, i-it's not..." He glanced down and Sanji watched him worry his lip as his hands fell away from Sanji's torso. "I do l-like them, b-but… I l-like you more. A-and I d-didn't mean t-to run… Run a-way. I don't a-actually w-w-want th-that! I kn-know that it was w-wrong… I d-don't know why I did… But you n-need to know th-that I didn't m-mean it! I l-love your f-friends and I l-love K-K-K-Kuin-na... B-but I l-love you m-m-most of all and... I r-really h-hope you c-can for-give me b-buh-because I d-d-didn't w-want to r-run away, I just-"

"It doesn't matter why," Sanji interjected before he realized what he was saying. "If you say you didn't mean it, I believe you. I was... devastated when you left, but you're back now and I love you and everything is okay now. We'll always have this in our minds somewhere, but before that we'll have each other and that's all that matters."

Zoro looked shocked, and Sanji kind of was too. He hadn't really thought about those words, but it made him so happy to have Zoro back that he didn't care. He knew that if Zoro ever got the urge to run away again, they could just go hang out with any and all of their friends without worrying about prying questions becaus everything was out in the open. It just felt like if anything else ever happened to them they could get through it, not only because he knew his friends would understand, but because he felt like they could get through anything after the day they'd had. He decided very quickly that he meant what he said.

Eventually, Zoro nodded and the two of them sat down in the kitchen and just talked. He didn't know how long, just that when they finally stopped talking (and that was only because they were too tired to go on) the sun had come full circle and was rising once again. It wasn't paradise-it wasn't even easy. But after the two days that felt like decades they had spent apart, Sanji couldn't be happier.

~*OMAKE*~

"How is that possible?"

"Yeah, that doesn't make sense at all!"

"Shut up, it was a really cool story!"

"But that's all it was: a story."

The reactions were mixed and the interruptions were many. Zoro had skipped a lot of the details, kept it short and sweet. He even checked with Sanji before he told them, he made sure it was okay, and even though the answer was unclear it looked like a yes. But it seemed to him that the humans didn't understand their situation, and if they didn't understand it then it couldn't be so.

"We don't know why it happened," Zoro told them again, squeezing Sanji's hand under the table. "Or how. Just that one day I was a tree, and the next I was a human. We've been together ever since."
"It was my wish," Sanji mumbled distantly, staring down at the tabletop. He had been damn near catatonic since shortly after their reunion and Zoro didn't understand why exactly, but he knew it was his fault, so he stayed by Sanji's side the entire time.

"Yeah," Zoro agreed gently, hoping that would encourage Sanji to continue. It didn't seem to work, but that was alright. He could be patient.

Nami, the witch, held up her hand as if to stop him from talking, but he had already stopped. "Wait, wait, wait... How can you expect us to believe that? I know those jokers look stupid, but I sure as hell am not," she snapped, and Zoro thought she was his least favorite.

"Hey!" Chopper and Usopp protested, but the others weren't paying any attention to Nami.

"Now, hold on, you're talkin' about that super green tree you showed us that one time, Sanji?" Franky addressed the golden-haired human directly, but Sanji didn't even look at him. He did, however, nod slightly.

"My, my," Brook muttered and laughed eccentrically. "It's just like the old wives' tale! I do enjoy those kinds of things. How delightful, it's real! Yohohoho!"

Zoro had been surveying the group as a whole, but he focused on Brook immediately. "Yes, exactly!" He saw Sanji shift out of the corner of his eye and gave his hand another squeeze. "You believe us?"

Brook nodded, a broad grin stretching his angular face. "Of course. You have no reason to lie about this! And, well, when you get to be my age, you need a little magic in your life before you're nothing but bones! Yohohohoho!"

"Don't be so morbid!" half the group chastised and Brook only laughed that much harder.

"I am more skeptical than our jolly friend here, but I think I agree," Nico Robin said calmly, and then she nodded at Zoro. "Stranger things have happened."

"Like what?" Usopp questioned loudly. Nami pointed at the long-nosed human and made a face that was probably supposed to be significant. Zoro didn't understand.

"Oi, oi, she doesn't need to explain herself!" Franky announced loudly, throwing his huge arm over the back of Robin's chair. "If Robin believes it, I believe it!"

"I can't believe this," Nami murmured, putting her face in her hand, much to Zoro's joy.

Chopper, who hadn't said much since they all sat down, cleared his throat. "Well," he said, glancing at Nami, "I can. It makes a lot of sense, because I've never met a person with green hair before. Even his arm hair is green-nobody dyes their arm hair!"

"That's..." Usopp paused, leering at Zoro's arm with wide eyes. It was freaking Zoro out a little, but he managed not to squirm. "That's actually really good reasoning! Holy shit, Chopper, you're a genius! And Zoro! You're a tree; how crazy is that?"

"AHA!" Luffy slammed both fists down on the table, reappearing out of his thoughts. He'd been eerily silent and, even though Zoro had only known him for a day, it was enough to know that that was extremely out of the ordinary. "Now I get it! You said your tree's name is Zoro! That's where I've heard that name before!" Luffy announced, and immediately began chattering on about how cool it was that Zoro was a magic tree.

It seemed to him that he had done what he'd set out to do. Six out of seven believed them and, when he looked over at Sanji, he saw that his eyes had moved up from the table. Sanji didn't look happy, but he didn't look upset, either. Zoro thought the word for that was neutral.

"We don't have any proof," Sanji said, his voice sounding like he'd just woken up. "It's a lot to expect you guys to believe us. I really appreciate it..."

Everyone started talking all at once, conversing with each other and asking Zoro and Sanji questions that Zoro had no chance of understanding in the flurry. He supposed that was a good thing when Sanji finally squeezed his hand back.

I think I'm going to do a short piece about Zoro and Zeff next. I want to make this really sweet father-in-law dynamic that I can picture really well right now. It just seems like Zeff would like Zoro a lot. Plus I've got to explain why Zeff knew about Zoro when Luffy and the others didn't, right?! On to the next mystery!

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