"You are not authorized to use that."

Darcy stared up at Agent Coulson, who was lurking by the kitchen door on Level Two.

"Are you kidding me?" she asked.

He stared straight ahead, as always. It annoyed Darcy, the way that no one in SHIELD seemed to look her in the eye. Further insult: he didn't make any move to respond to her acerbic query.

"Dude, it's a blender," she clarified.

"All equipment here was purchased with SHIELD funds. You are allowed access to the lower-level cabinets only."

For once, he actually looked at her before continuing, "And, between you and me, that's quite generous of the Board."

"Yeah, well, I want a smoothie," Darcy said. "So if I can't make one, can I go hit up Jamba Juice?"

Agent Coulson resumed staring straight ahead.

"Your status has not changed, Miss Lewis."

"Meaning I'm stuck here," Darcy replied, rolling her eyes. "I promise you, Thor Prince-of-Biceps didn't tell me any super-secrets, okay? I just want my ground up fruit."

Agent Coulson gave her a side-ways look, opened his mouth to speak, and then decided against it.

"Yeah, well, I'm going to use this unauthorized blender, watch out," Darcy said sarcastically. "If you feel the need to shoot me, can you wait until after I've eaten it?"

Coulson stared at her evenly. It unnerved her.

"What are you doing in here anyway?" she asked, stalling.

"It's a kitchen, Miss Lewis."

"Yeah, but it's not like you eat." She tossed another handful of strawberries into the blender. Coulson followed her movements, his face devoid of emotion as always.

"Why are we even keeping her around," he muttered, more of an aside than a question.

When Darcy gave him a look he pointed to the com in his ear.

"I heard that," Darcy growled. From Coulson's stance – his head cocked slightly to the left – he must be listening to some speech from Director Fury or the tech guys in the sub-basement. She hit the button on the blender and made sure to make it as loud as possible. Coulson didn't even flinch.

Darcy had the smoothie halfway to her lips when Agent Coulson stood up straighter at his post.

"We're going to have to ask you to leave the premises," he said, striding over and grabbing Darcy's arm.

"Hey!" she exclaimed, trying to stop her drink from sloshing all over the place. "What does SHIELD have against smoothies?"

"The captain would like the room," Agent Coulson said, attempting to steer her out.

"Oh," she said, suddenly serious. "Like Captain America? Is he here? I mean," she continued babbling and Coulson tried to drag her out, "I saw him on the news after he busted out of here and like… unf. I mean, really."

The elevator door in the hallway dinged. Agent Coulson stopped trying to drag the girl across the room and she slumped somewhat awkwardly to one side.

"Try to behave yourself," Coulson said under his breath.

Darcy was wide-eyed as the captain stepped off the elevator. She peered around Coulson's imposing black form to stare.

"Yes sir," she muttered. "Just one more question: Are you sure that this isn't secretly a modeling agency?"

Coulson gave her a warning look – he actually looked legitimately frightening – and Darcy made an effort to keep quiet.

Steve Rogers was dressed in his military khakis. He padded around the kitchen and bent over to reach into a lower cabinet. Darcy choked back another "unf" comment and instead simply raised her eyebrows in disbelief while taking a long gulp of her smoothie.

"How was the briefing, Captain?" Agent Coulson asked, resuming his post by the door.

The captain straightened, turned, and nodded stiffly.

"Satisfactory, Agent Coulson," he replied formally. As he addressed the SHIELD agent, he caught Darcy staring, peering from the corner. She waved a hand at him, the gesture somewhat muted.

"This is Miss Lewis," Agent Coulson said, sounding somewhat irked. "She has worked with others who are part of the Avengers initiative. However, she is a… civilian." He said the last word like it was a contagious disease.

Steve stood up straight, all but clicking his heels together, and nodded formally.

"Ma'am," he said.

Darcy gave him a look and couldn't prevent an awkward laugh from escaping into her half-empty glass.

"Yeah, uhm, at ease Captain," she said, saluting him with the wrong hand.

Steve hesitated, unsure how to respond. The military code hadn't changed much since he had last had a briefing. Darcy, though, in her leggings and sweater, was a completely different animal. After another moment of silence, he turned to get a carton of cereal out of the top cabinet.

"Tricky bastard," Darcy muttered to herself, narrowing his eyes. "So he has access…"

"Did you say something, ma'am?" Steve asked, looking worried.

"Nope," she lied easily. She strode over to better continue the conversation and change the subject: "You like Kellogg's?"

"I grew up on them, ma'am," he replied. "My mother always did say that she carried a torch for a quick and easy breakfast." He broke off to laugh good-naturedly.

Darcy stared at him, clutching her smoothie to her chest with both hands.

"What, ma'am?" he asked, looking concerned.

"That was amazing," she said. "I have to Tweet that."

"Miss Lewis," Agent Coulson interrupted, "I believe you were heading down to Level One A?"

"Uhh…" she stared dazedly at the captain. He stared back, his brow furrowed.

"Lewis?" Coulson repeated sharply. Darcy seemed to come back to herself; she made a noise of impatience somewhere between a sigh and a growl.

"But Coulson," she whined. "He's totally…"

The SHIELD Agent gave her such a glare that even Darcy Lewis gave in.

"Alright, look at me, going down to Level One."

She walked to the elevators.

"The stairs, Miss Lewis," Coulson called after her. "You don't have clearance…"

The elevator dinged behind her and Coulson sighed to himself.

"What's a Twit?" the Captain asked.

"Just some new technology, Captain. You should eat your Frosted Flakes before they get soggy."