AN:/ Hey, this is something I've been playing with for a while. I haven't really seen anything in this category quite like this, so I was interested to see what the reaction would be. I don't know. I only have about half of the second chapter done, so if the reaction to this is good i dont' know when I'll be updating next. yeah, this is just a tester I guess. To see how you all like it. Review and let me know what you think.

Batman Doesn't 'Do' Magic

Chapter One

by: deadlydaisy8o8

Originally Uploaded: Monday, December 24, 2012, 4:12PM

"Flash, if you do not move away from the zeta beam in the next nanosecond…" there was a schip as Wally moved to the other side of the room. Though he still complained.

"Oh come on Bats. I can help. At least let me hand you a wrench or something." Batman grunted.

Unfortunately for Wally he did not speak 'Bat'. The intricacies of glares and grunts were completely lost on him. So he did not understand that had just been explicitly told to approach at his own peril. Peering over Bat's shoulder from across the room Wally heard Batman grumbling about something and watched his hand emerged from the hole the upper half of his body was hidden in. Batman felt around for the correct tool he needed without pulling himself out. Wally jumped on the opportunity to help. He zipped up to the zeta platform that Batman was currently working in, fixing a glitch in the cooling mechanisms so that the transporter didn't overheat and explode.

When Flash zipped over to Batman several things happened. Flash reached down towards where Batman was grabbing for a wrench and in his haste, knocked several of the tools down into the hole Batman was working in. As Batman growled and started to pull himself up out of the hatch to scold the speedster, his hand was caught in a tangle of loose wires he had been rerouting. In Wally's haste to get back and avoid Batman's wrath, he inadvertently caught on Batman's cape and before he could stop he ended up pulling Batman back into the hatch and into the machine he had been working on. Catching himself on the machine, the hand that was tangled in the loose wires ended up being placed on the highly conductive metal tools that had previously fallen into the hatch. And thus the connection was made that put the next series of events into motion.

There was a surge of electricity and a roar as the machine was forced to power up much faster than it should. With a bright flash of light Batman was gone.

Batman kept silent at the unpleasant feeling of his molecules being disassembled and reassembled several times in succession. He silently cursed Wallace West while he focused on using his conscious mind to make sure he did not come out the other end face first.

Dumbledore had just opened his arms to start the welcoming feast when there was a crack like thunder and a slowly growing ball of intense light that appeared before the podium some fifteen feet above the floor. Immediately everyone had their hands on their wands and were ready to cast what was necessary at the intruding foe. With a second thunder like crack of noise, a dark shape fell out of the light to the floor before it simply winked out of existence.

The wizards in the room were forced to blink several times before they could see exactly what had come out of the portal. What they found was a man in a black cloak wearing a cowl that covered his face, with protruding horns. The man's appearance did not sooth anyone's nerves and they all continued to point their wands at the new appearance, waiting to see what Dumbledore would do.

Batman landed on a stone floor with restrained grace. He allowed himself to fall into a crouch to absorb some of the impact. He was already taking stock of his surroundings as the light above him disappeared. He was in a large rectangular hall. There did not appear to be a ceiling, but the illusion was not lost on Batman, who easily traced rafters up into the open sky. He had seen the parlor trick before on missions off world. Batman estimated that there were about five hundred to six hundred people present in the hall; all currently pointing sticks at him in a way that he could deduce that they were not simply sticks. A majority of those people teenagers and children. A quick glance identified the man at the podium as the man in charge.

Not knowing the circumstance or the odds of the 'weapons' in his adversaries' hands he stood motionless, and waited for the other to attack or stand down. He turned only his head to look to the old man at the podium.

Dumbledore looked at the man for a long moment. He attempted to look into the man's eyes to read his intentions, but found that the white pits were not the man's actual eyes, but a part of the mask. When the man made no move Dumbledore slowly lowered his wand, though none of those around him did. "Why hello there, and welcome to Hogwarts, school of witchcraft and wizardry. How might we assist you?"

Batman let out a mental groan that was so loud it was almost audible. It just had to be an alternate universe with magic. On the outside Batman remained emotionless, but his patience was already wearing thin. "You can start by lowering your weapons. I do not intend to attack, but I will defend myself with necessary force." A twinkle appeared in the old man's eyes and Batman did not like it. He would go as far as to say that he hated it.

Dumbledore smiled benignly and opened his arms after sheathing his own wand. "Of course, of course. No one here wishes to participate in conflict where it is avoidable. You simply gave us all quite a start. Unfortunately it seems you have dropped in just as we were about to partake in the Welcoming Feast. But it is of no consequence. I don't see a reason that the rest of the students cannot enjoy the fare while we have our discussions." Looking over Batman to the rest of the hall Dumbledore spoke. "Dig in everyone. I don't believe this little intermission is anything to worry over. Severus, if you would accompany me and this young man here to my office."

Dumbledore smiled benignly as he stepped from around the podium and moved towards Batman who was still standing in the middle of the hall. Batman noticed from behind the emotionless white pits of his mask that as soon as Dumbledore had started moving a man with dark lank hair in approximately his mid forties moved quickly around the table to catch up with the old man.

Dumbledore paused when he made level with Batman, who still concealed himself in his cape not allowing anyone to see his person, and waited a second for 'Severus' to join them before Dumbledore motioned with his hands to follow. Batman did not acknowledge the gesture outside of falling behind the old man when he started to move. He tensed slightly when the younger man fell into step behind him.

Batman was not at all happy with where he had landed. But he knew that if he wanted to get out and get back with little hassle he would have to cooperate with these people, unless they happened to be doing anything that he was morally obligated to put a stop to. It was in his best interest to go along with their demands until he knew what his situation was.

He could tell, by the old man's body posture that he was refraining from small talk, against his natural inclination. Batman was silently thankful as it allowed him to pay more attention to his surroundings as they moved. Small things caught the Batman's notice as he walked through the halls. The twitches of the suits of armor, the subjects of the portraits they passed moved and talked, communicating with each other. The staircases they passed shifted like an elaborate brainteaser. There seemed to be no electrical lighting, or anything that required modern technology. A glimpse out of a window allowed him to make the assumption that they were approximately two stories off of the ground, and that at least one side of the structure he was in was flanked by a forest. They were in a temperate climate that supported those types of trees, and that the season was closer to summer than winter, as there was no sign of snow or cold weather.

Silently the small parade came to a stop before a stone gargoyle. Batman was not at all surprised when the stone figure leapt aside at the correct password. The lone gargoyle in the middle of a hallway had all the makings of a secret entrance, and Batman was rather familiar with them. This one was very cliché and not at all impressive. Neither did he hesitate to follow the elder wizard onto the revolving staircase.

Batman's eyes did widen slightly at the sight of a phoenix resting on a perch beside the desk in the middle of the room, though no one was able to tell because Batman's eyes were hidden behind his mask. Dumbledore gestured as he moved into the office with we rehearsed steps, confirming that the office was indeed his, and that he spent a lot of time in this room. Severus, who had been hounding Batman's steps since the exited the great hall, waved his stick over the door several times while muttering under his breath before he turned to face into the room, keeping his post at the door.

"Well now that we are in a safe environment to discuss such things. If you would care to inform us of who you are and where you come from, we might be able to see what we can do for you." Batman watched as the old man lowered himself into the chair behind the desk and his eyes glinted excessively in the candlelight, a slight welcoming grin on his face. Batman narrowed his eyes, not trusting the expression. He ignored Dumbledore's question and asked his own.

"What is todays date?" he had already guessed that they were somewhere on the European continent, most likely somewhere in Scandinavia based on the accents he had been exposed to by the gossiping students, Albus Dumbledore, and the mumbling portraits. Batman ignored the blatant sneer from behind him and looked to the old man who was smiling patiently at him as he replied.

"Today would be September first of 1993." Batman did not acknowledge the answer before he started to speak.

"The most probable explanation is that when the zeta transporter I was repairing malfunctioned I was transported to another dimension than my own. If time here operates on the same schedule that my own does I am also in the past. In my own dimension it will be February twelfth of 2010. I mean no harm to you or anyone else. However I understand that precautions are necessary. All I request is safe passage and access to the materials required to start making my way back to my own world." Again Batman could see that the glint in the old man's eye was much brighter than it had any business being and he knew that what the old man would say would not be honest or straightforward.

"Of course of course. If there is anything that we can do to-"

"Headmaster you cannot seriously be considering that this ridiculous inconsiderate costume is telling the truth. He has yet to identify himself or even show his face! Surely you will not allow him to simply walk away!" Batman then knew what the glimmer in the old man's eye indicated. He was a manipulator. Batman knew that the old man had no intention of letting him simply walk away without an explanation, but he did not want to sacrifice his image of doddering old man in an interrogation, so he had brought one of the more abrasive characters under his employ to do the interrogating for him. Batman's eyes narrowed beneath the cowl. He would have to keep a very close eye on the man. But he allowed the games for now. It wouldn't be beneficial to reveal that he was onto the man's game so early on. Dumbledore replied calmly to the irritated accusation.

"Now Severus, this man has done nothing to indicate that he would be a threat. I see no reason to be so agitated." The old man paused before he turned to Batman again, "However in the interest of good manners I would like to ask for a name, and perhaps a removal of the mask."

At this Batman faced the old man in the desk and glared. "My alias in this guise is Batman, the cowl will remain for the duration of my stay. I will not compromise this information."

Batman knew the man, Severus, was moving behind him to draw a weapon before he reacted. Having outdrawn gunmen in upwards of fifteen years now he had developed almost a sixth sense about what was behind him. Before the man behind him had even his arm fully extended Batman had whipped around and had a batarang screaming through the air to disarm the man. His weapon dropped to the floor and in the next second Batman was on top of the lanky haired man, pushing his stomach into the floor with a knee on his back, twisting his arm up behind him.

Batman growled menacingly into the man's ear. "From this position there are five different ways for me to break your shoulder, three that will allow me to dislocate it. Attack me again and I'll show you all eight." Before Batman let go of the man on the ground he shifted his grip and picked up the wand that had rolled a short distance away and put it in the back of his belt. He then stood up gracefully off the man's back. Severus scrambled to his feet, wincing when he put pressure on the arm that had been twisted behind his back. His face was red and a scowl was on his face.

"Headmaster! Clearly this behavior is unaccepta-"

The man stopped when he realized that the old man in the chair wasn't moving, at least only enough to breathe, otherwise he was completely motionless, as if someone had decided to hit pause. Severus turned to look at Batman and then back to Dumbledore before he let out a scoff of stress and exasperation.

"Unbelievable, an adult with accidental magic." Silently Severus stuck his hand out to receive something from Batman. Batman quirked an eyebrow under his cowl at the petulant gesture. Snape rolled his eyes becoming increasingly anxious and impatient, "Unless you wish the Headmaster to remain permanently incapacitated I suggest you allow me my wand so that I might be able to fix your little outburst." Batman considered the man before him for a moment, looking briefly to Dumbledore in the chair out of the corner of his eye before he deliberately handed the man his 'wand'. Once the man was in possession of his wand he didn't hesitate to turn it on Dumbledore and speak a clear and enunciated 'Finite Incantatem'. And like someone had decided to hit play the headmaster started moving. Immediately a smile bloomed under his long whiskers, and the glimmer that seemed ever present in his eyes increased exponentially.

"What a splendid display! Tell me, Batman was it, has this sort of thing happened to you often? Have you been trained in your magical talents in you dimension?" Batman stared at the old man behind the desk and spoke in a voice that was so dry it made most camels thirsty.

"I do not posses any magical talents." Batman could not hold back a frown when that glimmer in the old man's eye became nearly blinding.

"Oh but I'm afraid you do! At least in this dimension you have the gift. I am nearly positive after this most recent display, but if you require further proof you need only to wave a wand for further confirmation." Batman only stared and watched, as Dumbledore almost seemed to be repressing giggles. Dumbledore continued to speak when he saw that neither Batman nor Snape were going to say anything. "A wand will only react in a magical persons hand, so if you handle the wand and nothing happens, then you would prove that I would be mistaken. Severus, if you would loan your wand once more?" Severus only hesitated for a moment before he obeyed the command and presented his wand to Batman handle first. Batman merely stared at the long thin piece of wood for a moment before he looked back to Dumbledore and told him with finality.

"I do not, have magic." Batman's frown descended into a grimace as the old man figuratively lit up at his denial.

"Then you will have no problem proving yourself right and taking the wand. If you are so sure then nothing will happen when you give it a wave. Go on." Dumbledore shooed Batman at the wand and now Batman did growl ever so lightly before he looked back to the wand and the man holding it, who now had is eyebrow raised challengingly. Batman sneered before he snatched the wand out the man's hand faster than he could process and gave it a small flick. Immediately all of the lights in the office went out.

Dumbledore started clapping and absently waved his hand to relight the candles before he started speaking. Severus was now smirking as Batman shoved the stick back into his hands. Before Dumbledore or Severus could say anything Batman was growling out his excuses.

"The fact that my molecules were assembled in the midst of an environment clearly saturated with magic and that my transport here was accidental are the most likely causes for this manifestation. I possessed no exceptional magical ability prior to my arrival. My inexperience in the area is no fault of my own. It however does not change the fact that I need to return to my own dimension as soon as possible. It is likely that my transportation home will solve the problem. I do not see the relevance of this discovery." Batman nearly snarled as he watched the man who had been up until this point tense and wary in his presence; sink into a nearby armchair with an amused air. The old man was nearly humming as he acknowledged Batman's points.

"True true. However I would irresponsible as a chief warlock and Headmaster of the this institution if I allowed someone to go about without the proper means to control themselves, not to mention I would be breaking the law. I can assure you that we will do everything in our power to help you on your way home but in the mean time, I think it is imperative that you stay here and at least develop a rudimentary grasp on your newfound ability. You never know, the knowledge might come in handy, and unfortunately neither of us know how long it will be until you are able to find your way home."

After Dumbledore spoke it was silent for an uncomfortable amount of time as Batman thought over what had been proposed.

As the world's greatest detective, he forced himself to look at this situation objectively. Realistically, he did not have any contacts in this world. Any resources he would need to acquire to build zeta tube to take him home, if he could replicate the beam that had taken him here, he would have to steal or scavenge. He had no idea of what this world was like, or what social norms were acceptable. If given time he would be able to blend in, but he would not be able to do so immediately, and that would likely get him into trouble. The resources being offered to him here were more than he would have if he chose to strike out on his own. In addition, if the mishap with freezing the old man had been any indication, he did not have any control over this…magic that he had somehow acquired, and it would be imperative to learn to harness it before he hurt someone else or himself.

If Batman were being logical about it, his best option would be to agree to this man's terms and see where that got him. His best shot at returning home would mostly likely to be to rely on the leagues realizing he was gone and waiting for an intervention from Doctor Fate to transport him back home. Wally had been present when the accident had happened so that was likely to be the outcome. However he did not know how long the time discrepancies would be before he returned. He could remain here for years, only to return to his own dimension as if no time had passed. In that case it would be in his best interest to gain himself an in, and learn to blend in to the best of his ability with his new environment.

It had been several tense moments but Batman finally spoke. "Fine. It is in my best interests to accept your offer. However if circumstances should change I resign the right to leave when I see necessary." Dumbledore leaned forward slightly as he steepeled his fingers in front of his grinning lips.

"Of course, but I truly don't think such measures will be necessary. I'm confidant you will feel right at home, as we will all try our best to make you feel welcome. Now that we have a plan of action I think it would be most prudent that we get you settled in one of the four houses and we can address things such as supplies and determining which courses you should attend tomorrow." With that Dumbledore stood and moved to a shelf on the side wall and gently picked up an old worn hat that looked to Batman like it was in the process of slowly decaying, the leather rim was stiff and shinny from coming tonto contact with so many greasy heads. It was only when the old man went to place the hat on Batman's head that Batman took a step back for Dumbledore's every step forward. Dumbledore smiled benignly at Batman, like he was explaining something to a frightened child as he spoke.

"Oh please pardon me, I don't suppose you would know what this is. This is the sorting hat. It has been in used at this school to sort our students into the houses of the four founders in their steed for hundreds of years. It will simply look into your mind and determine where you are best suited to stay based on your personality. It will only be a moment but we will need to assign you a house so that we can assign you a proper room and a house head to look out for you. We do want you to feel at home here, and a part of belonging is being sorted into a house. It's only fitting, I think, that as you will be learning here, you should have the opportunity to have the entire experience, even if you are a bit older than we are used to." Dumbledore took another step forwards, only for Batman to take another step back. Batman glared as he addressed the old man, still holding out the hat.

"I refuse to have my privacy breached. You may place me wherever you have room. I will not require a babysitter or a caretaker; I am able to take care of myself. I am sure that I will manage wherever you decide." Batman's gaze snapped downward to the hat in Dumbledore's hands as it started to shift. The rip in the brim opened up as it shouted suddenly.

"SLYTHERIN!" Dumbledore turned the hat around in his hand to look at it as he spoke to it. While Severus looked surprised, then switched to brooding in the corner.

"Are you quite sure? How can you be positive if you've not seen who he is?" The hat grumbled as it slowly situated itself over Dumbledore's hands.

"Oh its quite obvious where he belongs. I have been doing this job longer than you were a thought in your parent's minds. Sometimes I do not need to see to know." The hat slumped as it twisted back to face Batman. "Besides, I do not think house labels will do much for this one. Now let me get some rest Albus. It is hard work sorting through the minds of over a hundred eleven year olds." Dumbledore seemed crest fallen and he held the hat in his hands he tried to argue.

"But surely-" But the hat was already asleep, a very light flapping noise emitting from the brim as if it were some sort of snore. Dumbledore signed before he replaced the hat on the shelf. His voice was genuinely disappointed as he moved back to his desk.

"A shame that you have elected not to be a part of the tradition. However the hat did chose for you, and though its method was unorthodox, I think we ought to abide by it." The old man swept his beard to the side before he sat down and looked over to the disgruntled man in the corner. "Severus I do believe it will be up to you to find a place for our Mister Batman in the dungeons. If I am not mistaken there is a spare guest room a small ways from your chambers. I would prefer that he found a space in the seventh year dorms so that he might be able to get to know his house, but I don't believe anyone would be amenable to that plan. The spare rooms will have to do. However I do request that Batman be allowed to be present for your little welcoming speech in the dorms. I do believe that the students will be heading down in about a half an hour or so. Just enough time to show him where he is going to stay and then make it to the common room, I think." Severus grumbled as he raised himself from the chair he had been sitting in and replied to the Headmaster.

"Very well. However I refuse to be the babysitter of a grown man. I will not be responsible for his wellbeing. I have enough to worry about without having to keep track of a lunatic in a bat costume." Dumbledore frowned as Severus moved to the door.

"Please Severus. I am not asking much of you. Only to be hospitable to an unexpected guest. I don't think that he will be much trouble." Dumbledore had then turned to Batman who was still keeping up his poker face, even as the two men talked about him while he was in the room. "I will arrange for you to take a trip with Hagrid, a dear friend of mine, to retrieve your supplies. I do not doubt your ability to purchase a list of items on your own, but I believe a guide might be of use to you in the unfamiliar environment. To someone who has never encountered our world, it can be overwhelming. I will see you at 7:30 for breakfast then. Have a good night, the both of you." Severus sneered as he strode over to the door, not looking back to make sure that Batman was following. This was just as well because Batman too moved without a whisper to the door to follow.

It was a silent and tense walk down to the Dungeons. Once again Batman was spending the time memorizing the route and observing the significance of his surroundings. He knew he would spend more time later identifying the paintings and taking stock of the surroundings. The statues, the suits of armor, and the sweeping staircases. Eventually the hallways got darker as the space between the torches that lined them got larger. The portraits on the walls had been whispering furiously up until this point, but it was only now that there was one that spoke directly to them instead of simply watching.

"A guest, Severus?" Severus stopped abruptly before a large life size portrait of a thin man with a bald head and what Dick had once lovingly dubbed, 'a villain mustache'. His hair was white and his eyes a vibrant green. His robes were long and black, his hands shocks of white against the material. But most noticeable about the portrait was the presence of a large python around the mans shoulders and waist. Batman sunk unconsciously into the shadows when they stopped moving. The deep shadows offering an easy hiding place. Severus tuned and bowed respectfully to the portrait before he spoke.

"In a manner of speaking." Severus paused as he looked back to where he could just see Batman in the shadow as he introduced the two. "Salazar Slytherin, this illustrious gentleman calls himself Batman." Severus turned back to the portrait as he continued to speak. "He appeared in the Great Hall in a blinding flash of light. He claims to have appeared from a separate dimension. The Headmaster has deemed him sufficiently interrogated and believes him to be safe. It has been discovered that he possesses a previously unknown magical ability. He was then sorted into your house. As such it is now my responsibility to find a place for him." Batman watched the man in the portrait for his reaction. He seemed to know exactly where Batman was and stared at him for a silent moment over Severus' shoulder, absently stroking the head of the python around his neck before a small mischievous smirk appeared on his face.

"Well I certainly look forward to seeing more of you, 'Batman'. Do feel free to stop by. Severus, I know you will serve my name well. I will let the both of you return to your tasks. Good night gentleman." The man then walked out of the portrait, to some unknown destination.

Severus turned with a flourish and continued to walk down the dark hallway before he stopped by another life-sized portrait; this one was of a strict looking woman. She was thin and lanky. Her knees were knobby and exposed as she sat in an overlarge throne, a long silk gown flowing around her legs and hips. The neck of the dress stood all the way up to her jawbone. Her face was hallowed and long, her eyes were sunken in and made up with large amounts of black eye makeup. Her black hair was tied up tightly in an overly elaborate bun. She wore simple black heels, her nails also painted black. A crow cawed as it perched on the back of her chair.

"Hello Professor. What brings you this far down the hallway? Surely its not to simply indulge a lonely old thing like me." She recrossed her legs slowly and deliberately as she stared down at Severus through half lidded eyes. Severus sneered lightly as he spoke to the portrait.

"I have use of the guest chambers Lady Belladonna. If you would allow me access so that I might show him to them and allow him to reset the password, it would be greatly appreciated. He will be staying for an undetermined amount of time." The woman in the portrait opened her mouth to speak, about to ask where the guest was when Batman stepped out of the shadows, answering the portraits unasked question. The woman's eyes widened before they settled back to their half lidded gaze, a flirtatious grin on her lips.

"How very exciting I haven't had the pleasure of a guest in ages. What is your name young man?" Batman aimed his white pitiless stare at the portrait and he spoke.

"Batman." The portrait let out a long hum resembling some sort of laugh before she leaned downward in her chair, resting her elbows on her knees, her head in her hands, and continued to speak to Batman.

"And what would you like your password to be? I promise I won't tell a soul; I am excellent at keeping secrets. Well from everyone besides Severus of course. But I am the entrance to his guest quarters, so I am required to let him know." Batman tiled his head downward and to the side to glance at the black haired professor to see him smirking. Batman lightly glared at the man before he turned back to the portrait and spoke in a clear voice.

"Nine, one, nine, three, nine, two, one, eight, two, one, three, five, two, three, one, two, five, one, four, five."

The portrait raised an thin eyebrow at Batman "I'll be holding you to your word darling." Then the portrait swung open and the light went on in the room. Batman turned back to the professor when he started to speak.

"The start of term speech that the Headmaster is referring to is a speech I give every year to my new and returning students to set their boundaries and remind them of what proper behaviors consist of. I will request your presence in the Common room in twenty minutes. The password is wolfsbane." The man then turned his back without saying goodbye and walked back down the hallway he had come from.

Batman watched him go for no longer than a moment before he stepped over the threshold of the entrance to his rooms and started his examination.

The rooms were decorated a Spartan black and green. Any wears or fixtures such as handles and the hanging candelabra, a simple undecorated silver. There was a large fireplace with blackened stones where a roaring fire was already burning. This alone was enough to let Batman know that it was not safe to let his guard down in this space. If the fire was going it was entirely possible that someone had access to his room to do the housekeeping, and he would need to be aware of them and figure out a way around them.

There were several portraits that greeted him when he stepped into the room, he ignored them and he received several comments about his rude behavior from said portraits. He made a mental note to move all of them into a secure space, or out of his room so he would not have to worry about their seeing or hearing anything to tell anyone else.

There was a large desk against the far wall, flanked with bookcases that were sagging under the weight of their contents. The desk was stocked with inkpots and quills. Batman assumed that in this world they used calligraphy. He had also seen the instruments in Dumbledore's office, but had supposed those were for decoration and special occasions. The presence of the implements in his room disproved this theory. It was no matter. He had been made to learn calligraphy in some of his studies abroad.

Batman moved cautiously through the small living space and over towards a door opposite of the room, which currently stood open. Cautiously stepping through the door, he advanced in further to examine it when nothing happened upon his entrance.

The bedroom was a dark sage green; through the bed was a stark white, with accents of black in the pillows and the comforter. It was a four-poster queen, flanked by two antique nightstands. There was a wardrobe for a collection of clothes. There was a bathroom off to the right of the bed; it was decorated much the same way as the rest of the suite, in back, white, green, and silver.

Batman was satisfied for now, with the safety of his rooms. He had ruled out any immediate danger, however he would be doing a more thorough investigation of the living space when he did not have an appointment to keep. Batman exited the rooms and moved confidently towards the sounds of small children as he maneuvered the dark hallway.

Batman easily found where all of the children where filing in through a hole in a brick wall. It was a simple thing to conceal himself until the last of the students had gone through, and then slide in himself before the wall was about to slide into place. The students were all distracted by their gossip and looking around the new room to notice that Batman had found a nice dark corner to hide in beside a towering bookcase and a window, which appeared to look out into the depths of a body of water.

Batman watched as the older students herded the new and younger students to sit before the large fireplace in a stadium arrangement. He listened with some amusement at the gossip of the young ones as they waited for their head of house to arrive. Most loudly declaring what he thought was a blonde boy who had been called Draco Malfoy by the surrounding listeners. He seemed about twelve or thirteen. He held most of the room attention.

"My father will definitely be hearing about this. For the headmaster to just invite something unknown so casually into the castle. None of us know what he is, or what his intentions are. He is obviously dangerous. Who knows what the thing was capable of? Oh yes my father will be sure to take this through the proper channels. Who's ever heard of a man with horns appearing form a flash of light." As Draco rambled Batman glanced several things. One that the boy was well cared for. He spoke as if he were used to being the center of attention and getting what he wanted. Bruce knew the tone and posture from listening to it endlessly in Bruce Wayne's social circles. Secondly was that the boy's father was working for someone. Batman knew how to pick out language that indicated someone was an informant or had connections that they shouldn't. This boy's father was obviously using him to keep a pair of eyes in the school so that he could report to his boss about what was going on. Why that would be necessary, he didn't know. What he did know was that he did not like men who used their sons as spies and lookouts.

Batman was drawn from his thoughts as a hush fell over the room. The fire in the hearth turned a bright shade of green and Severus stepped out into the space the students had left for him. He only waited long enough to send a glance around the room. "Good evening, and for those of you that are new, welcome to Slytherin. I will tell you immediately that this house is nothing to be ashamed of. If people have told you we are evil, that we are worthless and lesser because of our house, then they are wrong. Being Slytherin is not about being dark or light, it is about doing whatever you have to do to succeed. As a Slytherin you are expected to stand behind your fellow Slytherin's. This is not up for debate. The rest of you will see enough conflict when you come into contact with other houses, you do not need to have it between yourselves. Any and all inter-house conflict will be handled here in the Common Room.

My door is of course, always open. You may come to me with any problem and I will do my best to assist you. You are the only House to enjoy this luxury with me, do not abuse it.

Tomorrow and every day after you will be required to be seen at all meals, unless you are injured or have permission to be elsewhere. A mandatory check up will be required for all first-years by the end of the month. I expect you all to preform to the greatest of your academic ability and to respect all of your professors. If you do not, in addition to whatever punishment you serve for your disrespect, you will also serve a punishment with me. This will include any and all punishments set regarding standard detentions.

I will expect you to represent yourself and your house with respect at all times. I am trusting that you are aware of what is appropriate and what is inappropriate and to act accordingly Are their any questions?" It was scarcely a moment before the blonde boy from before raised his hand. He however did not wait to be called upon and just started to talk.

"Professor Snape, what was that thing that appeared in the Great Hall?" The professor sneered for a moment and was about to open his mouth when Batman decided now was as good a time as any to reveal that he was there. He stepped out of the shadow he had sequestered himself in and appeared at the back of the gathering of students. Snape hesitated and his eyes widened for a small second at the sudden appearance of Batman. He had not seen him hiding, and had assumed that the man was not there as a show of blatant disrespect. The rest of the students saw the man's surprise and turned to look at what he was looking at. There were several shrieks of surprise and an instant uprising of whispers as several of the upper years reached for their wands.

"Everyone cease this behavior at once!" The professor glared over the students until all of them had settled down to looking back and forth between their head of house and the horned pillar that had appeared. Snape grumbled for a moment before he explained the situation in a tense monotone.

"As you can see the thing that has appeared in the Great Hall is indeed a man. He is informed us that his name is 'Batman' and that he comes form a separate dimension than ours. Shortly after his arrival it was discovered that he possessed magical ability that he had not before, as he was a muggle in his own world. The headmaster insisted that the man be sorted and allowed to control his ability while we assisted him in finding a way home. He has been sorted into Slytherin and he will be staying the guest rooms near my own quarters. It was my understanding that after he retrieved the necessary supplies, he would follow a first year curriculum." There was a very long silence in the room before the Blonde boy stood up off of the sofa he had claimed and exclaimed what most everyone was thinking.

"Are you saying a muggle in a stupid costume from a different dimension was sorted into Slytherin and your going to let him learn magic! He shouldn't even be here." Batman suddenly spoke up. He had played this game before. It had been a very long time since he had needed to make a name for himself, but he knew how it was done. If he did not act now he would be seen as weak for allowing a boy less than half his age to talk about him like this in front of him. Batman spoke in a strong voice that had the rest of the room shivering.

"I can assure you that I have no desire to posses your vaunted magic and that learning it is not a privilege I am taking advantage of out of choice. As soon as I am able I will return to my home and will be rid of this supposed 'gift'." The room was silent as everyone present registered just what Batman had said. Before Snape could get the situation under control Malfoy was running his mouth, sure that he had just been insulted by a muggle.

"Are you honestly telling me that you hate magic in the middle of a magic school?" Batman glared at the boy as he spoke once more. He did not miss that the Professor's as well as the boy's hand had gone tot heir wands in their pockets and that they were now tentatively fingering them.

"I believe that magic is a sloppy and chaotic medium with too many risks and costs to be an effective tool. It is a liability to me. It will make its users into weak and disadvantaged people." Batman could see the movements of his adversaries before they had even moved. He moved fluidly into a crouch before he propelled himself upward tucking into a flip. As he uncurled himself a bola went flying towards Malfoy, wrapping him from his legs up to his shoulders, while Batman landed nearly on top of Professor Snape. Batman contorted himself out of the path of a streak of red light before he came down on the professor with practiced precision, two nerve strikes to his shoulders disabled the man's arms. A quick sweep and the man was on the floor, unable to catch himself with his hands.

"What are you doing! He just attacked Snape and me. Why are you just standing there?" Malfoy was standing wobbly on his feet. Snape was about to open his mouth and shout a few choice words at the people concerned. Namely Batman and Malfoy, but before he could the overly calm voice of Batman filled the room.

"It's because they're afraid." Malfoy turned from the rest of the room, who were all nervously holding their wands pointing them but not doing anything, towards Batman who was now right in front of him and grabbing tightly onto the rope that bound him, pulling him right up into his face. Batman spoke in a dark hush that carried to the rest of the room despite its lack of volume. "It's because they saw me move, and know that I could defeat everyone in this room with minimal effort. And unlike you they have the sense not to attack what they cannot defeat."

Batman threw Draco down onto the couch and turned to Snape who was still lying by the fireplace. He had a bleeding cut on his forehead from where it had made contact with the fireplace. They locked gazes for a moment and when Snape did not say anything Batman turned to the room and all the wands shakily pointed at him.

"All you need to know to stay safe is to stay out of my way. And to those who think that they can get away with their crimes… I only have one rule." With that Batman turned to Malfoy and hit a button on a ball that sat in the middle of the tangle of rope that was holding him and the strands immediately retracted back into their container. After he had collected his bola he turned and moved silently back to the entrance and towards his room.