Author's note: As a joke I mentioned to my brother how funny it would be if there was a Walking Dead: The Musical. At the time I had been listening to the Newsies soundtrack and he challenged me to rewrite the Newsies lyrics to fit The Walking Dead. So, as my stuffy nose kept me up all night and boredom set in, I did.
This particular one is set to the song "Carryin' The Banner." If my sleep deprivation continues, I might rewrite some of the other Newsies songs as well. We shall see.
Enjoy!
Disclaimer:Clearly, I don't own The Walking Dead or Newsies. If I did, this would already be in production and you would all be enjoying a special (if mildly insane) holiday episode.
Glen:
That's my red car!
Rick:
We'll find another
Dale:
Hey, bummers, we got work to do
T-Dog:
Since when did you become my mother?
Daryl:
Ah, stop yer bawling!
Merle:
Hey! Who ast you?
Glen:
Try the Wal-mart or the Target
Racetrack:
Try Winn-Dixie it's guaranteed
Rick:
Try any shop, or mall, or grocer
Shane:
They almost all has food we need!
Rick:
I smell ammo
Carol:
You smell foul!
Daryl:
Saw this deer last night ...
Andrea:
Move your squirrel!
Daryl:
Pass the crossbow!
Lori:
For some soap, I might!
Survivors:
Ain't it a fine life
Surviving walkers through it all?
A mighty fine life
Surviving walkers tough and tall
Every morning
Women do the laundry
Men do watch the boundary
Sure don't sleep too soundly
What a fine life
Surviving walkers home-free all!
Rick:
It takes a smell as bad as death
T-Dog:
The kind that ladies can't wash out.
Shane:
I think Merle Dixon's on some meth!
Andrea:
Hey, Rick cuff him to the-
T-Dog:
Spout!
Survivors:
Summer stinks and winter's waiting
Welcome to Georgia!
Boy, ain't nature fascinating
When you've gotta hunt?
Still, it's a fine life
Surviving walkers with me chums!
A mighty fine life
Blowing every brain out as they come!
Daryl:
I'm no snoozer
Sitting makes me antsy
I likes living chancy
Survivors:
Peachtree to Buckhead
What a fine life
Surving walkers through the town
Carol and Lori:
Blessed children
Though you wander lost and depraved
Jesus loves you
You shall be saved!
SUNG IN COUNTERPOINT:
Merle:
Daryl, brother,
Since you lost me I am undone
Brother loves you!
God, where's my hand?!
Carol:
Just gimme half a cup
Dale:
Something ta wake me up
Andrea:
I gotta find a lure
Rick:
I gotta find more ammo
Various Survivors:
This bat is all I got
Wish I could catch a breeze
Sure hope the food is caught
All I can catch is fleas
God, help me if it's hot!
Somebody help me, please ...
Survivors:
If I see the walkers
I'll shoot up the walkers
And I'll kill anything I hafta
'Cause at one against twenty
If they get a bitey
My friends I'll just eat up afta
SUNG IN COUNTERPOINT:
Various Survivors:
Look! They're cookin' up a squirrel
You call that a squirrel?
I seen better food
Like the roadkill on the street!
I was gonna start with Dixon
But I think he's got his bow on!
Tell me, how we gonna make ends meet?
Group two:
What's it? Stew?
That won't do!
Lori where's your son?
Oh, he's gone!
Will ya tell me
How we gonna make ends meet?
Survivors:
We need a good grip on our weapons
We need an godsend or more guns!
Shane:
How 'bout a sordid love triangle?
Survivors:
Hey, stupid, that ain't news no more!
Midtown to Collier Heights
Down to City Hall
We improves our chance of livin'
Walker's gonna fall
SUNG IN COUNTERPOINT:
Group one:
Still we'll be out there
Surviving walkers man to man!
We'll be out there
Killin' every walker that we can!
See our campsite?
Survivors on a mission!
Group one:
SHANE:Kill the competition
Wonder if it's in Britain
While we're out there
Surviving walkers is the –
Group two:
Look, they're warnin' of a walker
They call that a walker?
The idiot who called it
Must be blinded by the Sun!
Did ya hear about the beat-down?
Group three:
Heard Ed got beat by Shane now!
Group two:
Heard that Carl's wandered off. How?
Group three:
Why do I miss all the fun?
Group two:
Hitched Merle to a building.
Group three:
Headin' for the CDC
Group two:
Little Lori's got a secret
Group three:
Jenner's further than I reckoned
Group two:
Place is a nuthouse
Group three:
Look a countdown!
Group two:
On the run out Jenner beckoned –
Group one:
It's a fine life
Surviving walkers through it all!
A mighty fine life
Surviving walkers tough and tall
See the herd line?
Survivors on a mission
Shane: Kill the competition
Find the next provision
What a fine life,
Surviving walkers
It's a fine life
Surviving walkers
It's a fine life
Surviving walkers
It's a fine life
Surviving walkers
It's a fine life
Surviving walkers
It's a
Go!
Group two:
Would you look at that headshot?
You call that a headshot?
I seen better kills
From Guillermo up the street!
We were gonna head to Benning
Now CDC'll the thing.
Would you tell me how we're ever
Gonna make ends meet?
Hitched Merle up to a building
Meetcha CDC, we're hoping
Little Lori's got a secret
Jenner's further than I reckoned
It's a nuthouse
Countdown's started
On the run out Jenner beckoned!
Go get 'em Cowboy
You got 'em now, boy!
Go get 'em, Cowboy!
You got 'em now, boy!
Go!