Steve expected the holidays to be rough, but not like this. He knew that he'd tear up at the memories of his mother's sweaters, their pitiful Christmas tree, and the fruitcakes that he couldn't get enough of as a child. He knew that he'd long for his mother's kisses, Bucky's jokes and the hustle and bustle of a Brooklyn long ago. But what he didn't know, until December 25th, was just how lonely he really was.

All of the other Avengers had left the tower for the holidays; Clint and Bruce went on an island vacation, Thor traveled back to Asgard, Natasha married Fury and moved in with him several weeks ago, and Tony was God knows where. Sure there were Christmas trees on every floor, more eggnog and cookies than he knew what to do with, and he was wearing the tackiest Rudolph sweater he'd ever seen, but nothing felt festive about any of it.

He took the elevator up to the top floor, got out and walked into Tony's room. Steve knew he wasn't supposed to set foot on the top floor, let alone Tony's room, but he didn't care. Whenever Tony was gone he would always sneak in his room and lay in his bed, enjoying the way the genius' blood red bed sheets felt wrapped around him. There was nothing between them and Steve knew there never would be, but something about being in Tony's bed made him feel safe and secure. The scent of expensive cologne and metal always stuck to anything Tony wore or sat on, and as Steve inhaled the scent lingering in Tony's pillow it painted a beautiful image of Tony lying fast asleep in a tangle of blankets in his mind.

When Steve was settled into the billionaire's sheets, he turned onto his right side and looked over at the small, silver Christmas tree in the corner of the room. He carefully studied the little glass Iron Man ornaments adorning it, and noticed much to his surprise that a mini replica of his shield was the topper on the tree. The thought of Tony reaching up and putting his Captain America shield at the tip of the tree made Steve's heart flutter in his chest, and he quickly brought his left hand up to his chest in an attempt to soothe it. He knew that he shouldn't read into something as silly as an ornament, but Steve couldn't help but hope that maybe Tony did think about him as more than just the man who fought in World War II and had his own set of trading cards.

He didn't let the thought linger too long in his mind, however; if Tony would have shared the feelings Steve had for him they'd be together right now. Instead, the billionaire was off in some other country, maybe for business or maybe for pleasure, with a beautiful girl under his arm. There were times when Steve wished he had been born a woman so Tony would pay attention to him as more than just a friend, but he was not transgendered and didn't have the dysphoria to go along with it. The only problem he had was a sense of perpetual loneliness that ate away at his heart and soul. Nothing could take that away, not even the warmth and comfort of Tony's bedroom. Material comforts never were enough for Steve, and he envied the fact that they worked for his friend, even if only for a few minutes.

Steve moved his attention from the top of the tree down to the bottom, and noticed something shiny at the base of the tree. He knew he had no right to snoop, especially in someone else's space that he wasn't permitted to be in, but Steve allowed his curiosity to get the better of him. He slowly got off the bed, keeping the blankets held snugly around his shoulders, and bent down to look at the bottom of the Christmas tree. Steve noticed a small envelope with a bright silver tinsel bow on the top, and saw a note stuck underneath of it.

Taking care not to damage the envelope or the tinsel bow, he carefully removed the note and read it to himself:

Steve,

If you're looking at this- which I'm sure you are because I know you like to sleep in my room sometimes. I promise I'm not mad about it but I'll admit that it's kind of weird- go ahead and open this.

-Tony

He dropped the note in shock and disbelief at the fact that Tony knew about his habit. While he was thankful that Tony wasn't angry about him sleeping in his bed, Steve immediately felt a sinking feeling in his stomach. This envelope, whatever it could have had in it, had the potential to make his holiday worth something or sink him into an even deeper depression, and he was terrified to find out. He broke out into a cold sweat, his hands were shaking, and he felt his entire body flush red. Steve wiped his brow, reached down and picked up the envelope, and after several minutes of deliberation he carefully opened it, taking care not to tear what was inside.

When he finished opening the envelope, he pulled out a small piece of rice paper dyed a pale shade of blue, and he noticed a small note written on it. He was impressed by this fact alone, as writing on this form of paper could prove to be difficult. After carefully running his fingers over the paper for a few seconds, he finally read the note:

I love you.

Steve read the three words over and over again, but he could not process them. They were the only three words he'd ever wanted to hear in his entire life from someone, anyone, other than his mother. But the fact that they were written by Tony, the object of his affection for five years, was simply too much. He couldn't believe it; he looked at his watch for the date to see if it was April Fool's day and didn't get the memo, but it was in fact Christmas. As he read the note several more times, Steve was startled when he heard a noise behind him.

"I love you, Steve. I know this probably wasn't the right way to go about it and maybe I should have waited until your birthday, or sometime other than Christmas, but I couldn't stand it anymore. When I found out you've been sleeping in my room, I just thought that maybe you felt the same way. I'm just rambling now, I guess I should give you some time to proc-" Steve cut Tony off by rushing to him, grabbing him and pressing a powerful, passionate kiss to his lips.

"Five years of wanting you, wanting this. I love you too, Tony, so much. I love you so much it hurts," Steve whispered shakily as they moved over to the king sized bed and tumbled down onto it.

Tony landed on top of Steve and broke away from the kiss and looked deep into the blonde's eyes, making sure that this was really happening and not just another one of his dreams. When Steve began to unbutton Tony's black dress shirt, he knew that he was finally going to get the touch that he'd been craving for so long. As soon as his shirt was off, Tony swiftly unbuckled his pants, unzipped his fly and flung his pants and underwear on the other side of the room, not wanting them to get into the way of the lovemaking that was hopefully about to come.

"Can I take off your clothes, Steve? Is that okay?" Tony questioned, making sure that this was what the love of his life wanted; he didn't want to rush Steve into something he wasn't ready for, especially when their emotions were so raw and exposed.

"Please… I want to make love to you, if you'll let me," Steve swallowed hard as Tony removed his festive white Rudolph sweater and red and green striped pajama bottoms, and the blonde's body turned as red as a tomato when he heard Tony gasp.

"I-Is something wrong Tony?" the blonde asked self-consciously, but he realized that Tony was simply surprised by his larger than average penis and smiled a bit to himself in relief.

"Yes I want you to make love to me Steve… But I'll admit you're going to have to be careful, I've never had one this big before," Tony responded, his voice thick with lust as he ran the fingers of his right hand slowly up and down Steve's length.

After touching Steve's cock lightly for a few seconds, he gripped the blonde's member and rubbed the head in a circular motion with his thumb, eliciting a loud, almost embarrassing moan from Steve. As he worked his hand up and down, he admired Steve's flush cheeks, slightly parted lips and the drugged look in his eyes. Tony always wondered what Steve looked like in the throes of passion, and he was pleased to find that the super-soldier looked far more beautiful than he ever could have imagined.

"Tony, I'm going to come soon if you don't stop… I want to be inside of you, I don't want to wait anymore…" Steve begged as he pulled Tony's hand away from his cock with his right hand and tipped the brunet's chin up with the other to give him a kiss.

Tony nodded his head, then pulled away from Steve, scrambled over to the drawer of the nightstand table on the left hand side of the bed and pulled out a bottle of KY. He popped the cap, poured a generous amount on his fingers and took his position on top of Steve again. He smeared the fluid onto the blonde's member, and opened himself up with the remaining lube on his fingertips.

"Now I'm going to lie down and I want you on top of me, you can kiss me and look at how you make me fall apart," Tony purred into Steve's ear before getting off of the love of his life to assume a position on his back near the headboard.

Steve flipped over and positioned himself between Tony's legs, lining up his cock with the brunet's entrance. When Tony nodded for him to begin, he slowly pushed through the tight ring of muscle, taking care not to hurt the smaller man. Tony loved the burning sensation that came from being stretched out by Steve's impressive member, and he entered into a state of euphoria, elated that the man on top of him was the one he'd been pining for the moment he saw his handsome face.

"You look so beautiful, Tony. I love the way you smile while I'm inside of you. I never thought I'd ever get to see you this way, I love you so much. I want you forever, want us, want this… You're my life Tony. You're my everything," Steve cooed as he kissed Tony's neck until the brunet grabbed him by the chin and brought him up for a deep, intimate kiss, reveling in the way Steve's mouth tasted.

As Steve slowly thrust in and out of Tony's body, the smaller man reached into the drawer on the nightstand, fumbling around until he found the small item he was looking for and shoved it behind the pillow. Steve did not see what happened, as his eyes were closed from the pleasure of intercourse, which turned Tony on all the more.

"I love you, Tony," Steve moaned into the brunet's mouth as he came, releasing his semen deep inside of his body, and Tony he felt the heat of Steve's sperm he came too, covering his stomach and chest with cum.

The two continued to kiss as they rode out the aftershocks of their orgasms, Tony wrapping his arms around Steve's neck to keep him as close to his body as possible. As Steve slid out of his love's loosened hole, he broke away from the kiss and looked deep into Tony's eyes. He noticed that tears were beginning to well in the brunet's eyes, and as they fell from his pretty brown eyes he wicked them away with his left hand, proving to Tony just how much he loved him.

"Steve, I can't imagine my life without you… Will you make this the only Christmas I've ever enjoyed and marry me?" Tony asked as he pulled the red velvet box out from behind the pillow and opened it, revealing an expensive silver engagement ring with a band of red and gold and a band of blue and white intertwined, symbolizing the love he felt for Steve.

"'Til death do us part," Steve whispered with a broad, toothy grin as Tony slipped the ring onto his finger, and for the rest of the night the two men didn't let go of each other.

For the first time in his life Steve felt like he was truly loved, and all it took were those three big words written on a piece of paper to make him feel complete.