All I Want For Christmas Is You (Wincest), a supernatural fanfic

COPYRIGHT:I OWN THE STORY'S PLOT

All I Want For Christmas Is You

by: Dravvin Rayne

Minnesota was already coming down with harsh snows for the season. Weather advisory recommending people stay indoors. It left Dean in a hotel room until the snow blew over or until it was safe to go back out. Since his last call with Sam he's been finding himself fighting to not call him back. Dean's doings were wrong; he wasn't going to deny that. His false text to his brother about Amelia needing him only to have him pissed to the nine once he found it to be false, but what else could Dean have done? Sam wasn't listening on Benny, he never had. To make it worse, he had Martin to deal with, well until Benny killed him for posing threats to his great-granddaughter.

Dean's tried praying to Cass, wanting just someone with him so he didn't feel this empty pit in him. It was the same feeling he felt while in purgatory before Benny saved his ass from being vamp-chow.

Going to the bottle he soon spiked his eggnog and sat on the crappy stiff couch as he watched Christmas-themed shows in celebration of it being the eve of Christmas. It was the very first one Dean's spent alone – well give or take when Sam was in Stanford, but still. His mind flashed to the last one he celebrated. He and Sam were nearly dead meat to those loony of creatures, but in the end they had a merry Christmas. No presents or anything, unless you called cheap gifts from a gas station presents, but the real gift Dean received was spending it with his brother like old times.

Now, Christmas didn't hold anything for Dean. He was a Scrooge this year and damn fond to be one. Sipping the eggnog from a tiny plastic cup the hotel provided to each room he stared at Frosty on the screen. Scoffing, he turned the channel until he found a movie he hadn't seen in years. Leaning in his seat he watched as the Pumpkin King and Leader of Halloween Town dancing and singing in the wintry wonderland of Christmas Town. The last time Dean's seen The Nightmare before Christmas was probably when it came out in '93. Man, seemed so ancient back then. His mind went back to Sam as he wondered why Dean took interest in the movie anyhow. To this day neither knew the answer, Dean just liked it. It was a dark Christmas trying to be as merry and bright as possible. Guess it reminds him of home and how he'd never have a merry and cheery Christmas again. Not since his mother died.

Sighing in more of dismay, he tossed his empty plastic cup to the ground without a care. A commercial then came on with happy families for a K-Mart advertisement. He watched it through empty eyes and changed the channel once more to the local news:

"Well Sam, it's—"

He changed the channel once more, "Merry Christmas Sammy!" He changed it again and again until he threw the remote at the TV. "It's not that common of a name, c'mon!" Dean lashed and turned the TV off. Why did things keep reminding him of his brother? Sam hates him and he probably always had deep down. Hell, he probably blamed Dean for pulling him back into this life! Granted, Dean was guilty of it but sue him for wanting his brother.

He's always wanted his brother. Even in purgatory he wanted Sam. Sam was his main determination to even get back to Earth, but now he wished he never left the damn place. Nothing could numb over the missing gap in himself, the part Sam possessed, and that was his heart. No one had his heart how Sam did. No one. He could never explain it.

His phone rang and his heart skipped beats at the fact it may be Sam. Answering it anxiously without even looking at the caller ID, he shouted in a near relieving gasp.

"Sammy?!"

"You and your broth'a got into it again?" Benny's voice was heard on the other end. Dean sighed as he sat on his bed. "Sort of, but where did you go, Benny? You killed Martin and—"

"And I ran. I thought maybe Sam would be coming close call. I know how close-minded he can be."

"Well, he won't talk to me…so stay in hiding, alright?"

"Plan to, but I was callin' to see if you were alright."

"Peachy…"

"Sure don't sound like it, c'mon chief, what's going on besides the obvious?"

Dean was never one to open up. But some reason he did just now, "It's just Sam. I shouldn't let him affect me like this but…I can't help it."

"Well, you and him were dag gone close. You spoke of him too much, I was wondering if he was your lover or somethin'."

He chuckled a bit then as he rubbed the back of his head. "No, he's not but I wished he wa—"

WHOA! He stopped instantly there as he felt awkward now. "Forget that part. I'm drunk…"

"I've tried that excuse a few times, mate. I know you're using it as a crutch. So, you're into Brokeback Mountain?"

"No…I just…I don't know. That woman he left me to die for, I felt…jealous. He knew I wouldn't stop looking for him, and he didn't even try to find me. I guess I can't get over that."

"How could you? He betrayed you. He didn't intend to do it, I don't think. You've said he doesn't think far in a decision."

"He doesn't, but…"

"So why can you open up to me, but not him?"

Dean shrugged like Benny could even see it. "I really don't know. I normally never do."

"Well, change that, at least where Sam's concerned. You want his full trust, give him yours in exchange. Scratch your back and he scratch yours."

"He won't talk to me, I've tried."

"Keep tryin'," he pressed and soon paused on the other end. "Well broth'a, I'll be getting off now. Not my thing, but Merry Christmas and happy drinking."

"You too, Benny…thanks."

The line went dead and Dean stared at the phone blankly before he soon placed it on the nightstand table. Deciding to call it a night, he turned the lights out and soon laid his head in the cheap-flat pillow. Sighing, he closed his eyes and tried to sleep, which soon came after countless hours of tossing and turning.

The night darkened. No ounce of light shining over the horizon. Coldness swept his body as he hugged himself in a desperate plea to warm himself. As shivers ricochet down and up his spinal cord, he soon felt his teeth chattering from the unruly cold winter night. Ice bit into his high-raised cheekbones, but he kept moving. The man ignored his numbing legs as they froze to freezing, his green eyes showing much determination to wherever.

The destination lied in the farthest corner as Texas revealed its first snow showers. Dean placed his hand on the frosty glass window as he peered in to see his baby brother with a woman. "Sam!" He called, but no answer. Placing both hands on the glass now he began banging on it, but once more Sam was ignoring him and laughing with the curly-haired woman. A dog was in the warm house as was a balding man as they had Christmas dinner.

Feeling his eyes sting as warm tears slid down his frosty cheeks, Dean soon felt a tug on his leg and looked down to see a hand coming from the ground. He panicked and tried running only to have another hand shoot out and grasp his other leg. "SAMMY!" He cried out in desperation and continued pounding on the glass. "Help me! Sam! Help!"

His brother laughed as a clearly funny story was told, and his heart broke in shatters. "Sam…"

Feeling the harsh tugs come, Dean was on the snow as more hands shot out and pulled him further into the ground minus his struggles. "He's never wanted you. The moment you left was his out," was Crowley's voice and soon everything went black as Dean shouted one last time.

"SAM!" He jumped from his bed in a cold sweat. His heart pounding in a marathon as tears continued to blur his vision. Dean was back in the darkened hotel room as the sun soon began to break over the horizon. As it warmed all surroundings, Dean's body remained iced. Shaking mildly he heard the door knock to his room. Thinking it were Benny, he wiped his tears and mustered up a front.

Unlocking the door he opened it to see a cherry red nose and cheeked Sam. His oceanic eyes were warm as it coursed through Dean's body. "Hi Dean," he said softly.

"Hi Sammy," he replied and swallowed hard. Awkwardness fell into place, even more so when Dean and Sam ended up looking up at the same time to see them both under a mistletoe, and Dean looked at Sam with hopeful eyes as Sam remained unreadable.

It was then iced cold hands cupped Dean's hot and wet cheeks and soon Sam's lips were pressed into his own. Feeling his body ignite in fire, Dean wrapped his arms around Sam's neck and deepened the kiss. Sam's tongue was so soft and expertly into this that Dean moaned in his mouth.

Pulling back, Dean felt a mild smile coming on the very first time in weeks. "I'm sorry, okay?" Sam finally said. "Look, Benny…is Benny. If you can trust him, then…then so can I. It took me this time apart to realize I'm being like dad, and I swore I never would be."

Dean swallowed and took Sam's cold hands into his warm ones, "What I did…with Amelia, I'm sorry. I just knew she'd be the one to pull you out of this. I never thought it that much through. I'm sorry for it."

"You wouldn't have done it if I wasn't being an ass. Dean, I need you. You…drive me insane, I hope you know."

Dean arched a brow at that, "Like you don't me?"

"I was jealous of Benny. I shouldn't have been. But…I…think I'm in love with my own brother. Whole time I was with Amelia, I thought of you. I needed you. I should have looked for you, I hate myself for not—"

"I know I'm in love with you. I hate it when we fight, Sam. But…well, let's put it behind us now, I mean we can't do anything about it now."

Sam soon smiled at that, "Can do."

"Can I ask one thing?"

"Sure, what?"

"How'd you find me?"

Sam fished in his jacket and pulled his phone out from an unknown number and showed it to Dean. "This text message," he replied and Dean soon read it:

Dean's in St. Peter, Minnesota – first hotel in. Stop fightin' and just go to him. He needs you, Sam.

"I… wonder who—"

Dean stopped then as he remembered something and soon chuckled. "What?" Sam finally asked and Dean shook his head, "I'll be right back, okay? Get warmed up." Fetching his jacket and shoes, Dean headed out of the hotel alone. Heading for the woods near, he soon saw the person he was looking for. Benny remained the same with his scruffy facial hair and his cap on with his parka. He smiled nonchalantly at Dean as he remained leaned in a tree. "So what you're playing secret Santa now?" He asked and Benny remained modest. "I have no idea what'cha talkin' about, broth'a."

"You sent Sam that text message, didn't you?"

"I may have…but I may have not."

In Benny's language, that meant a yes and Dean smiled brightly. "Thanks for that. For once, I'm glad you didn't mind your own business."

"When have you known me to ev'a mine'd my own?"

"Touché," he replied and soon pulled the vampire into a hug. "Thanks again."

"I still have no idea what'cha talkin' about, but anytime. Now, go and have a Brokeback Mountain Christmas," he said once he pulled from the hug. Dean nodded with a chuckle. Benny would never know how much he appreciated this. This was the best Christmas present he could ever have: His brother with him.

Rushing back into the hotel he saw Sam already making coffee. "Where'd you go?"

"Out," he replied and soon walked over and kissed Sam on the lips once more, which he accepted and kissed back. Wrapping his arms around Dean's waist he smiled and touched his forehead to his own. "Sorry I didn't bring you a present."

"I already have the present I want. Merry Christmas, Sammy."

Sam pecked his lips again and sighed, "Merry Christmas, Dean."

Merry Christmas all! :D