A/N: Hey guys, this chapter is more mature, just a heads up. Also, thank you for the reviews, they make my day.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl

"Hello," Dan answers

"Hey…What are you doing right now" Blair asks

"Are you actually asking me what I'm doing," Dan smirks. "I see you've learned some phone manners since I left."

"Shut up Humphrey," He can feel her eyes roll. "Serena told me you had lunch with her."

"There's no reason to be jealous Blair, it was just lunch."

"I'm not jealous…..okay, maybe a little, but what do you expect, you don't answer my phone calls, you've been ignoring me at social events…Dan, I miss you, you were my best friend, and that spot hasn't been replaced since you left." Blair says

"Call Serena"

"Dan," Blair says softly. Her voice sends shivers down his spine.

"I have to go,"

"Don't…Don't do that…please."

She said please and he wanted to cave, if he continued to talk to her, it was over. This phone conversation had to end before it was too late.

"Bye," He says and hangs up

Fuck

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He gets a call from Alessandra informing him about Summit Entertainment being interested in buying the rights to Inside and its sequel. He usually says no, but this time the money is too large to turn down.

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He meets Nate and Eric at a bar. Both him and Eric decide it would be fun to get Archibald plastered. They learn that this was a decision they would regret. Once they leave the bar, they have to help Nate get back to the loft and that's when it starts.

"Guys…I think I fucked up," Nate says drunkenly. Eric and Dan look at each other, they both know some secrets are about to spill. "I'm starting to have feelings for Serena again."

That wasn't the only secret Nate shared. Apparently Jenny told Kelly about how things ended with Blair. She wants them to break up so he can get back together with Blair. Nate also reveals he had sex with Georgina in a bathroom of some UES party two years ago. And if that wasn't shocking enough, Nate admits he doesn't like bacon.

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He's at the Van der Woodsen penthouse for family game night. It's filled with drama. Jenny leaves crying. Nate apologizes to him. Lily and Eric's new boyfriend aren't getting along. He doesn't understand why Blair is here. Serena admits there's no chance of her and Nate happening. Later, he catches them making out in kitchen.

He decides he needs some alone time, so he goes to his old room. He always wished he had a chance to use the room more, but the loft was more private.

She's there, studying the room

"Hey."

She turns around, a warm smile forms. "You hung up on me." She says. "I don't understand why you're making it so difficult for us to be friends?"

"Is that all you want," Dan asks

"Of course, if you forgot I chose Chuck," Blair replies.

Here it is, the Blair Waldorf defense mechanism, he knew she would later regret this, but it still hurt, so much that he was having trouble breathing. He didn't know it could still hurt so much. She chose Chuck, she left him just like everyone else has.

"Yea, that worked out great," He replies while gritting his teeth.

Her eyes become vulnerable and he starting to soften

"I'm sure we'll be fine, we always find our way back." She's not backing down

"I thought you would've grown up by now, but you're the same. I get it Blair, I didn't mean anything to you. I was just a toy, you played with me until you got tired and that's fine, I'm over it."

"You're finally getting it." It's hard to understand how she can be so cruel. He thought they connected while they were dating, he still felt it, but it's clear he was wrong.

She is looking at him directly in the eyes, not fidgeting, appearing stone cold.

"Once I became a part of the Upper eastside… I expected to get hurt, betrayed. I knew there would never be anyone I could fully really trust, even Serena. But then… I started to talk to this breathtaking brunette, she was different. She always protected the people she cared about"

He smiles as past memories wash over him. "I saw what she did for this guy who never deserved her, she gave him everything, her whole heart, she would do anything for him. There is nothing like Blair Waldorf being in love with you…So even though I knew there was a good chance you would go back to Chuck, it was worth the risk, because there is nothing greater than your love."

Her eyes soften, her lips quiver. Her wall is breaking and it looks like the Blair he was talking with on the phone is back. "You Bitch!" Jenny screams from downstairs. They hear a plate shatter.

Dan runs downstairs to see Jenny being tightly held by Rufus as she tries to attack Serena.

"Fuck you you fucking slut!" Jenny screams. She's clawing but isn't able to get to Serena because Rufus is holding her back. Serena is crying standing behind Nate. "You did it to Blair twice and now me, are you really that desperate for attention."
Serena leaves the penthouse in tears while Rufus tries to calm Jenny down.

Dan looks glances over to Eric

"Welcome home," Eric says

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"What are you doing" Dan says as him and Nate are standing in the kitchen of the Van Der Woodsen penthouse.

"I know what I did to your sisters was wrong, but it's Serena man."

"Nate, don't do this. You're going to get hurt, she doesn't feel the way you do."

"I think she's the one that got away,"

"You're just another fling to her, she'll dump you once she's bored." Nate looks hurt and it makes him feel guilty for being so honest. "It won't last, she'll crush you."

"I've already broken up with Jenny, I can't go back."

"This isn't about Jenny."

"I need a favor….I left my wallet at Blair's, could you get it, I need to talk to Jenny and Serena. You know, to sort things out, but I'll meet you at the loft later."

He hates the idea of being alone with Blair, but he still nods.

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It's been a while since they've been alone. Her perfume consumes the elevator. Its winter, yet beads of sweat are forming on his forehead. Her dress is killing him, her cleavage is so unnecessary. He knows she can read him. It leads to her lips curving slightly. He knows she's close to forming her famous devilish smile. But she surprises him and bites her lower lip and it's starting to eat him inside. It's like she's slowly wearing him down with her eyes and her lips on purpose. Who wears a dress to family game night? He can't stop thinking about what it was like to have sex with her.

"Fuck it", He thinks

He launches towards her and presses his lips against hers. She kisses him back with need and desire. Her kisses are telling him she's been waiting for this. He presses her against the elevator wall. She puts her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist while their tongues are fighting with each other. He can't pull back, he doesn't need oxygen, he needs her.

The elevator door opens, they continue to kiss. He can't take her upstairs, he wants her now. He presses her against the wall of her foyer. They pull back panting.

"Con…condom," he stutters breathless.

"I want to feel all of you inside me," She whispers panting

That's all she has to say. He rips her silk panties off and thrusts inside her. She tightens her legs around his waist to get him as deep as he can. He's thrusting, harder and faster. She's moaning with every thrust.

"I miss you," She whispers in his ear which only makes him go harder. "I dream about this, I've waited and waited," She continues to whisper in his ears. He doesn't know how long he can last. "Say it, I want to hear it, I need to hear it."

"I love you," He says staring into her dark eyes thrusting her against the wall. She screams with pleasure as she reaches her orgasm.

"I want you to come inside me," She says panting while staring into his eyes. He can't hold it any longer. He explodes inside her as she kisses his neck.

He finally lets her down. She starts to kiss him hard making sure he knows how much she wants him. Then she grabs his hair and pulls his head back, stares into his eyes and says, "I love you to." He's into deep now. "I realized I was in love with you after spending time with Chuck." She takes his hand and leads him upstairs

"I need to get Nate's wallet," He says

"O, it's in Serena's old room"

He stops in the middle of the stairs. It hits him, there's no future here. She left him, he cheated on her, she knew about Nate cheating on Jenny. Nothing's changed, he's back to the Upper East Side. All these people do is hurt him and his family. Blair will never change. He just ruined his future with Kelly, the girl he's in love with. She's always been there, it's has been the most stable relationship he has been in and Blair Waldorf has ruined it. He has ruined it.

"I have to go"

"What," Blair asks gripping his hand tighter

"Blair, this was a mistake, we have no future, you left me with only emails and phone calls."

"You make it seem like it was like some easy decision. Dan, I was torn between you two. Chuck and I had history, me and you were only beginning. I mean I was only 21."

"It doesn't make me feel any better" Dan says bitterly

"I left him for you and I waited for you, only you. I was here alone, thinking about you while you were with that Taylor Swift wannabe. I made a mistake, like you did with Serena, why can't you forgive me like I forgave you"

"I do, but what do you want now"

"You"

"Everything is too fucked up, I cheated on you with Serena because I didn't have faith in our relationship. I don't think I can ever trust you and you can't either. If we date, your friendship with Serena will be ruined," He starts to look down to avoid her eyes. "And I don't think I can give you my heart again, you crushed me, I don't trust you, I never will," He says

"You can't do this. You can't tell me you love me, how there's nothing better than my love and then leave me." Tears start rolling down Blair's cheek. "You gave me hope"

"Blair, Nate's been sleeping with Serena here. You say you love me, you haven't stop thinking about me, but I've been here for two weeks and you didn't even tell me. It just reminds me of our relationship, which was basically a lie, you loved him and didn't have the decency to tell me. Sometimes I feel like our relationship wasn't real."

"No… how could you think that," Blair sobs

"Blair," His hand cups her cheek. "I'm sorry, but it's over. We need to stay away from each other." He says softly, then leans in and kisses her forehead. "You truly were the love of my life, I don't think I will ever be as happy as I was with you." He whispers before leaving Blair to crumble on the stairs crying.

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Kelly's upset. He's that guy. She forgives him and wants to stay together, but he knows he doesn't deserve her love. They're finished.

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He's back where he began… Alone

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He calls Chuck. They both need to get over the same girl. Surprisingly, Chuck shows up at the loft with a bottle of scotch.
"That's your solution, get hammered and forget it ever happened," He says

"What's wrong with forgetting," Chuck asks as he pours them a drink.

"It only last for a day, I'll remember tomorrow," Chuck hands him a glass

"Then drink again," Chuck smirks. He rolls his eyes. "Humphrey, as much I want Blair, I have to ask, why are you here," Chuck asks as he takes a seat

"She's my Chuck." Chuck raises an eyebrow. "I was always there for her, like she was always there for you. The relationship was about pleasing her. I mean out of all the years I've known her, what has she done for me? I mean she never even read my book. When Inside came out, I was at my lowest, I needed my best friend to support me. " He starts to smirk. "You were my only true friend at that point." Chuck chuckles

"I would still rather be you because in the end, she wants you, not me."

"You don't know the details of our relationship. When I told her I loved her, she was so cold about it, she didn't even say she needed time, it was like I never said it. She can say she loves me now, but she's never shown it. I'm not going to go back to her. She's not good for me."

Chuck understands his pain. Chuck was the one who was being strung around by Blair that whole year. She wanted to run away with him one moment, then she told him she wasn't in love with him.

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Chuck's tired of Bass Industries, he's tired of writing. They decide to go to Africa.

.

TBC