Inspired by CrimsonLink310's suggestion of Natsu's intelligence.

What's a smart?

"Alright we're settling this today!" Cana slammed her beer mug on the bar and stood.

"Yeah," Natsu cheered with his arms in the air. "Wait... settling what, exactly?" He lowered his excited limbs.

Cana snapped and pointed at her pink-haired guildmate. "How smart you are, of course!"

"Huh?"

"How would you test that," Lucy asked.

"Yeah, how? Flame-head's got street smarts, that's about it," Gray started.

"Uh-huh, what he said," Natsu chirped.

"I do think you're selling him a bit short, Natsu has been very good at solving the occasional puzzle on missions," Erza commented, walking up to the small group.

"By setting them on fire..." Lucy mumbled.

"We'll give him some tests. People around the guild will come up with portions to get well-rounded results," Cana decided.

"Tests?" Natsu pouted.

"We're starting off with general safety," Freed began, hands behind his back. Natsu sat in a chair in front of him, all tables pushed away from the center of the guild.

"What do you do when you're alone at night and hear someone behind you?"

"Punch 'em."

"...I guess that's a possible solution, it wasn't the one I was looking for... moving on." Freed grabbed two leaved branches from the bar, making his gloves were securely in place on his hands. He faced Natsu and held the branches out. "Which one shouldn't you touch?"

Natsu quirked an eyebrow as he glanced between the leaves and Freed. "Neither, Freed! Both of those are poisonous. How did you even get those? One is from Pergrande Kingdom and is illegal to transport and the other is an endangered plant species used in the ancient migration patterns of were-tigers! Freed," He whined.

Freed blinked slowly. "I'm going home for the day." He set down the branches and walked out of the guild.

"Bye Freed!" Natsu yelled, hands cupped around his mouth.

Levy set down a book in front of the dragon slayer, "can you read this page and summarize it for me?"

Natsu shrugged and began reading, his finger following every word on the page to keep his place. He leaned closer and closer to the page the further he got, until, his head dropped completely on the page and loud snores erupted from his mouth.

"Natsu," Lucy cried.

Levy covered her mouth with her hands.

Gray slumped his shoulders.

Erza punched the back of Natsu's head.

"YES MA'AM," he shot up and shouted. He wiped a bit of drool from the corner of his mouth.

"Could you tell me what you read," Levy asked after pulling the book from under his elbows and closing it.

Natsu purses his lips and looked upwards. "'Twas pretty much just talkin' 'bout the war between Fiore, Bosco, and Seven when they were setting up their borders."

Levy squinted and opened the book back up to the page she had him read. "Could you tell me what the major resource was that caused the dispute?"

He rolled his head to the side and crossed his arms. "Mmmmm well at the time, people thought certain parts of Akane beach had healing properties in the water... then there were people who wanted the land that became Clover Town because of its interesting topography... the forests were bigger too, so maybe wood. Idk, Levy, can't really just pick one thing ya know?"

Levy sighed, "well, your reading comprehension is pretty impressive."

"'S gotta be since I can only read Lucy's novel when she's not looking and trust me, she's almost always looking."

"Natsu..." Lucy growled.

He shrank in his seat. "It's so cool though, Lucy. The adventures in your book are like going on missions but without the magic exhaustion and bandages." He put his hands up in front of his face to hide.

Lucy's expression softened, and she put her hands over her heart. "Is it really that immersive?" Natsu nodded, still hiding. "Oh," She leapt to squish him in a hug. "I'm so glad my story is so good that someone that doesn't normally like reading would be so engaged," she hummed and moved her arms from side to side, taking Natsu's torso with her.

"Does that work as emotional intelligence?"

"One plus one equals what number?"

"Two."

"How about two times one?"

"Two."

"What about four minus two?"

"Two."

"Eight divided by four?"

"Two."

"His intelligence is unlike anything I've ever witnessed." Ezra's eyes were wide as she spoke.

"All of the questions you asked had the same answer, Erza," Lucy commented, then she asked, "nine cubed?"

"Two."

Lucy sighed, "see? He's just guessing."

"Alright Natsu, explain how fire works," Macao asked.

"Well, what I do is concentrate my magic power in my fists and then BAM! Flames!"

"I meant a regular fire," he clarified.

"Hmmm, there's a base or fuel, then there's air, and then there's heat."

Macao and Romeo looked at each other, nodded, and gave thumbs up to Lucy and Cana who were standing behind Natsu. "He's a genius," they confirmed.

Lucy rolled her eyes.

Laki presented a wooden box covered in movable parts to Natsu, only saying the words, "open it for a prize."

The word "prize" brought a fire to Natsu's eyes and he started twisting and sliding different pieces on the six sides of the cube. The more he adjusted and prodded, the more his initial grin turned into a firm frown, his eyebrows furrowing further and further. After five minutes, he yelled, "I hate this," and threw the box on the ground, lighting his right foot on fire, and stomping furiously.

The blackened exterior withered away to reveal a 100 jewel gift card to 8island. Happy swooped in and grabbed the card before Natsu could set it on fire as well. "Woohoo! Free lunch," the cat exclaimed.

Laki was horrified that the puzzle box that she spent a good hour on had been reduced to splinter material and ash in only five minutes.

"Didn't I say he was good at puzzles," Erza asked, bragging.

"It wasn't worth it," Cana concluded, "we'll never be able to understand Natsu's brain capacity."

Lucy nodded in agreement.

"I said he only had street smarts... does that count as correct information," Gray added.

"He doesn't even have street smarts, he's got woods smarts. Like an animal," Lucy countered.

The three of them sighed in unison.

End

There ya go. A something to satisfy your something. Not my best, but whatevs bro. Has it been a year since I've updated yet? A little under three months off... sorry about that fellas. I'm obviously not super active, but I'll still take requests and post when I get that itch to write trash. I mean, last night I went on a Waluigi drawing spree, who knows what creative thing I'll do next?

Hope you enjoyed, and I shall see you around!