So, I'm posting a new chapter. I've had it on my computer for quite a while, unsure if I should post it or not. It's a bit longer than the others, but I don't think you'll mind. Hope you enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or characters from Twilight

«Mel, talk to me,» Embry begged as he entered my room. He looked tired, or perhaps just sick of waiting. I didn't understand why he kept asking me the same question and I looked at him with surprise in my eyes. Embry wasn't angry, quite the contrary- he was worried. nervous. But I was angry. I was hurt and I was sad and I felt as if everything had been pushed back to before I'd ever known I had a brother. To that time my foster family had kicked me out on the sidewalk and left me for hours on end because I'd fucked up. Because I'd exploded and broken one too many rules.

«No, I'm done talking.» I felt my face change. I felt myself become something else towards him. I was no longer Melanie Uley, sister of Sam, willing to make an effort to kick start my family again. I was Melanie Boston, foster child on her way out the door as soon as it opened.

«Mel, please I just want to talk. I'm sure you need to share you-»

«I'm done sharing, Embry. I share with you I share with everyone. I'm done with this shit.» I stood up from my bed and shook my head as I filled up with despair. I didn't want this anymore. I wanted it to stop, and for everyone and everything to just… to just leave me alone.

I got out of my room and was about to walk out the front door, when Leah smashed right into me. She was standing in the doorway, her arms crossed and a smirk on her lips.

«Where the fuck do you think you're going?»

She wore cut offs and dark green tank top, her toned arms displayed the quelete tribe tattoo, and her brown eyes were attached to me. I swallowed, but didn't back down.

«I'm going out, Leah,» my exhausted voice sounded, and I almost shuddered. I felt so fucking tired. So sick of this. Her smile faded and something strange, something different appeared on her face. If I as right, she felt sorry for me.

«Look, Melanie, as much as I like to piss off Sam going out right now is not a good choice,» Leah licked her lips and waited for me to respond. I felt dejected, as if I'd already lost everything. Sam would be angry if I left alone, but Paul would be furious. And as much as everything felt like shit at the moment, it was the pull towards him, the feeling of having let him down which made most of the weight on my shoulders. I was angry and hurt but still affected by the imprint, still feeling that horrifying tug.

«Can you at least go somewhere with me? Somewhere that isn't this house, or Pauls apartment, please?» I asked and felt myself become nervous again. But I wasn't the only one needing a break from my surroundings. Sam and Emily needed me gone for at least a couple of hours too, and if I was right Paul needed some time as well.

Leah sighed and looked me over. I don't know what she was looking for. Maybe my pale face, my sweaty fingers, or my sad eyes.

«Sam isn't going to be happy about this, Melanie.»

Leah had taken me to a bar on the reservation. It was only her and Embry who had been left to watch over me in spite of how angry everyone had been at me leaving, and in spite of the fact that a vampire had in fact just been threatening me. I hadn't told anyone about what exactly had happened, but so far Embry was the only one who had tried to make me tell him, and I don't think that was because anyone was ordering him to. I think he did that because he was a good friend. Maybe they didn't realize how close he'd been to taking me. Though there was another alternative swirling around in my mind: they just didn't care.

The goal would be the same however I put what had happened, they needed to take the vampire and rip him to pieces, so there was no need to tell them anything more than they already knew. It would all lead to the same. I couldn't make it simpler.

«Do you want anything?» Leah asked pulling me out of my thoughts. She was acting pleasant, her brown eyes having softened and the constant sneer I was used to seeing on her face was not there. I didn't recognize this softness and I felt weary about it.

Leah and I had barely talked and yet she'd let me out of the house, she'd taken me somewhere just because I'd asked to leave, even though Sam would be furious with her. I thanked the stars the pack was out patrolling, and that Sam had gone with Emily, though I dreaded what they were talking about…

«How about a ginger beer?» I asked Leah hopefully. I was far from 21, but my fake ID was still working wonders. She became silent and waited for a moment.

«Okay, ginger beer it is.»

The bar was small and cramped with just dozen or so people sitting inside. The walls gave off a woody smell and it was hot. I was here because it would be the last place anyone would start to look for us.

The beer appeared in front of me as soon as I flashed my id at the bartender, and Leah handed him some money. She wasn't drinking, there was no point in it really when it took such a large amount to get drunk.

«Okay, so I've taken you away from the others and even given you alcohol, why don't you tell me what happened,» Leah asked, or rather demanded, and I furrowed my brows in frustration. Some of the softness in her eyes were gone, but I didn't think she would do anything to force me. Her demeanor hadn't changed that much.

«I'm not going to tell you anything, Leah.»

She raised her eyebrows in surprise and nodded her head slowly. The bar man was starting to eye us suspiciously, but I tried to ignore him. He must have been in his forties, and his russet skin was plastered in tattoos. Maybe he thought he was intimidating like that, or maybe he thought he'd seen us before and knew I wasn't supposed to be here.

«Listen, if you're just going to shut everyone out things will only become more dangerous for us. We need to know exactly what we're up against and exactly how to deal with this. It's not a time to be selfish,» Leah said, pushing me with wide honest eyes. I could see she was doing her best to seem calm and collected, to seem as if she actually cared about me. But she didn't. We both knew that and it was ridiculous to pretend otherwise. Just as it was ridiculous to pretend things were suddenly going to get better from here.

«Why on earth do you think I will be able to clear that up for you? I mean come on, Leah, all I know is that it's a vampire.» I swallowed and looked at her angrily, turning away from my lie. «The only people who can give you information about vampires is the Cullens, so if information is what you really need then why don't you talk to them?»

A sneer appears on her face as soon as the words were out of my lips, the disgust for the vampires showing.

I shuddered, suddenly feeling sick. Just a few hours ago an evil vampire had touched me, had breathed down my neck, had told me he wanted to turn me. And when I'd gotten away from him, when I'd been allowed to leave alive, everything had gone to shit.

I knew one thing. If he threatened to kill Paul if I didn't stay, he would threatened to kill them all if I tried to hide. And if I told them about it they would try to do just that. I had to, in some way, deal with this alone or they would get hurt, and I would not have that on my conscience.

«Why are you so unwilling to talk about this?» Leah asked her voice turning back to the miserable one she was usually sporting, and I felt my face fall. I was so sick of having to explain myself. So I didn't. I didn't say a word. But I looked at her. I looked at her with sad eyes and told her without saying it out loud, that I needed her to back off.

Moments went by without us exchanging any words and I drank up my ginger beer quickly, suddenly feeling the need to leave this bar.

«I hope things get better for you soon, Melanie,» Leah suddenly said. «I'm sick of hearing Paul moan about how difficult you are.»

I felt myself stop breathing for just a tiny moment, and looked down at my hands. I felt the blood rush in my ears, felt tears suddenly press on my eyes, felt my throat constrict. I knew I was a difficult imprint, I knew that. But he was so good to me now that I'd thought he was happy. That things were easier than they had been. But here I was and things were definitely not easy. It made perfect sense for him to be miserable. It made all the sense in the world.

«We should probably get back before Sam has a new fit,» Leah continued quickly when I didn't respond to her insult, and I turned my eyes to her, nodding my head slowly. I didn't want to leave, or rather, I didn't want to go back. I wanted someone who could understand me, who would agree with me. Tell em I was in fact not acting crazy, but there were Eno such people here. But things would be different now. They'd hurt me and I'd had enough.

The next couple of days were uncomfortable for everyone. Paul and I hadn't really talked after the silent blow out he'd had, but he was still following me around school, still touching my body, still looking at me as if he couldn't be without me. I let him. He could hug me, talk to me, even kiss me, but he knew something was changing. I made sure of it. Made sure that he could feel me become colder and colder, gradually. Made sure he felt uncertain of what I felt and thought.

Sam and Emily was a whole other story. I hadn't spoken to either of them since that day. No words exchanged, in an attempt to cut all the contact I could with them. To show them I'd had enough. I spent almost all my time in my room- their room, and I didn't respond to any of their attempts to talk to me. Both of them had tried telling me how important it was that I followed the rules, that I should in fact have known better, but that they had been harsh and now I knew. I had walked silently into my room as they spoke and closed the door behind me, shutting them out of my sphere. I understood the anger, but I refused to live like this.

In a prison.

«Mel, please tell me what's wrong,» Paul begged grabbing my hand in his and trying to force me to look at him. His hand was soft and careful, cradling my fingers in his palm. He tried so hard to make me see him, so make me listen. But his apartment was no longer a comfort to me, this living room was no longer enough to give me any sense of safety. I had been here before and I was here now, so the vampire would know where Paul lived. He would know how to take him when he was sleeping, when he was resting, when he was thinking about something entirely else than what dangers were out to get me. So Paul could try to make me look at him and connect, but I couldn't. I just… couldn't.

He was warm, as always, and his voice was strained and desperate. He needed me to talk, he needed me to come with some kind of reassurance that everything was fine, that things were going to be okay between us, but I wouldn't. There was nothing to say.

«He can hear it.» I said silently, thinking of Sam and looking down at my black shoes and wanting so bad to just hug Paul. To let him take care of me. To let everyone else take care of me, so that I could let my guard down and relax. But I didn't work like that, did I? I wasn't capable of giving in to happiness even when it was staring me in the face. A normal person would have told them what had happened. A normal person would have run to the pack for protection. But I wasn't normal, that at least had been made clear by everyone. They thought I was fucked up and fuck, they were right.

«There will come a time when I won't have to phase, Mel, but right now… right now I can't protect you in this form,» Paul struggled to get the words out and he bent his head down closer to mine, leaning it on my forehead. He wanted me to speak up so bad. Wanted me to cave so fucking bad it broke my heart. A boy like him should not have to ask for someone like me. Should not have to work for someone like me. But he thought I needed protection, and he would make his life all about protecting me. Even when we both knew I could just… escape. Maybe that scared him more than the vampire.

I didn't respond to him. I knew that if I pushed him on it he would run away with me. Would stop phasing for me and go into hiding. He would do it if he thought it would make me happy. He would do literally anything for me. And as it turned out, I would do anything for him too.

«Please, just look at me Mel, I'm so sorry,»

I couldn't take it anymore. I let my eyes place themselves on his dark distressed ones, and gently cradles his head in my hands. His skin was warm against my touch, vibrant, and my fingers were cold. I looked at him, feeling a part of me crumble away at the sadness I saw, at the worry. This boy was my soul mate, the person I was forever meant to be with, and I couldn't even try to take his worries away.

Paul was about to speak, the muscles in his face starting to move, and I quickly leant forwards and pressed my lips to his in an intense moment of desire, of love. Of me wanting to make him feel at least a little bit better.

«Don't apologize,» I whispered as we parted, my eyes closed and my lips almost trembling. «You didn't do anything wrong. I did.»

I felt tears push against my eyes as soon as the words had left my lips. I hated myself for having said them. Sam would hear and he would think he was right. That I had caved and knew that going out had been stupid. That I had been the stupid one. But that's not what I meant. Sam had nothing to do with Paul.

«Anyways, I should get going,» I opened my eyes, no longer feeling like crying, and stepped back from his breathing form slowly. My back pack was lying on the leather couch in the small room, where I'd thrown it off when we'd walked in. He must have noticed my reluctance to sit down. «So soon?» Paul asked as he dragged his hands down my arms, and bit his lower lip gently. I swallowed, feeling myself become reluctant to walking out that door. «Yeah, I need to go to Sam's,» I said and turned to grab my backpack. Paul wouldn't push me more today, I had given him just enough to stay put.

«I'll see you at school tomorrow.»

Paul walked me to the door and looked down at me one last time. «Mel..» He started, his voice uncertain and his eyes intense. «Shh, just… just don't think about it, okay?» I asked and leant up again kissing him quickly. It was the only way to make him shut up.

«I'll see you tomorrow,» I repeated and stepped out of his apartment, closing the door behind me before he got the chance to finish any of his thoughts.

*** It was my birthday. I was turning eighteen and for the first time in my life I was no longer in foster care. Holy shit. I'd thought it would have felt better. In a sense more freeing than it did. It just felt… wrong.

When I stepped out of my room and into the kitchen, Sam and Emily was there to meet me. The kitchen was a small room, with just enough space for us to sit and eat in, or for me to do homework if I wanted a larger space than my room. But today it felt smaller than usual. Sams towering body was taking up attention, the nervousness in his brown eyes, and Emily seemed almost… relieved. As if she was hoping something would change today.

I looked them over and saw the dark circles under their eyes and the sheen of tiredness covering their bodies. Sam stood closer to Emily than I'd ever notice him doing before, he was protective over her still. As if I would hurt her, as if he was scared I would open my mouth and scream.

«Happy birthday, Melanie,» Sam cleared his throat and spoke gently. His eyes were over my body, looking for signs of how I was feeling today. He must have known I wouldn't tell him. «I baked you a cake, Mel, for the big day,» Emily chimed in and I followed her eyes as she stared down at a chocolate cake on the counter, her lips stretching into a thin smile as she tried her best to look happy. Her heart was beating in her chest, and her palms were sweaty.

I looked at both of them, not saying a single word but taking in the scene in front of me. My face was relaxed, careless, and I walked over to the counter. Where a stack of forks and plates were placed as well as a box covered in ribbon.

I took a plate and carefully cut out a piece of the cake, feeling their eyes on me the whole time and hearing Sams breathing become more elaborate as the seconds went by. When the moist sponge hit my plate, and I started eating it, something in him broke.

«Melanie, you could at least say thank you,» he said angrily, forcing his voice iut in the silence of the room. He was right, I should have said thank you. But I didn't want to.

I looked up at him and swallowed the piece of cake in my mouth. He wasn't really angry, he was just annoyed. His eyebrows were furrowed, and his lips were tight, but I could see in his eyes that he was just tired. That it had been a long while of nothing but stress and uphills. I stared at him for a few moments, letting the uncomfortable connection exist. He tried to read my face, and I let him try.

«We got you a gift, Mel,» Emily interrupted and quickly took the box on the counter and slid it closer to me. I turned my gaze to her. Something wasn't right. She was nervous, which one might expect when someone was giving someone a gift, but there was something more. I got it, in a sense. She'd screamed at me and I still hadn't made her think it was okay.

My hands let go of the fork and I pushed the cake away from me. I needed to open the gift before I could go. Before I had done the obligatory birthday things. She stared at me as my fingers moved over the golden ribbon, untangling it, and when I slowly opened the blue box, uncovering whatever was inside.

"We thought...for your frames," Emily said as I swallowed, trying my best to keep the lump in my throat from growing. Inside the box were pictures taken in moments where I hadn't been paying attention. It was me with the boys, alone, with Sam and Emily, with Paul. But also one of Anna and I sitting on the stairs outside the orphanage when I was ten. One of me as a baby, with foreign arms around me emerging from a woman I didn't know, a woman who didn't love me. And another one of miss Miller and I from my first week there. There were more of them. Different people, but always me. I recognized these pictures, I'd seen them before. I knew where they came from.

Closing the lid of the box abruptly I took a step back from the counter, with my hands clutching the box. My throat constricted and for a moment I couldn't speak, afraid I was going to cry. I felt as if someone had cut my heart out and showed it to the world. I felt as if someone had tried so hard, but made me feel so… so sad. It was heart breaking.

Emily and Sam were watching me on the other side, waiting for a reaction, for me to say something, anything.

I opened my mouth, letting my lips part and the tip of my tongue moisten the skin on my lips. My heart was beating quicker in my chest and as I looked at them, I felt my stare become objective. Felt it become void of emotions. Felt myself go back to normal, to who I was supposed to be.

«Thank you,» I said and swallowed. Relief filled Emily's eyes and Sam calmed considerably down. She reached out for me, her hand hanging limply in the air, as if to say «thank you for coming around,» and I stepped back once more.

«Can I get my file back?»

Emily's hand fell and Sam closed his eyes. There it was. The reality of the situation. The reality of what they were doing to me.

«What file?» He asked gruffly and leant forwards looking at me dangerously. I cocked my head to the side and blinked, wondering how on earth he could still pretend as if I wasn't aware of what was going on around me.

«The file you pulled the pictures from my past from, the only file in the whole entire world these pictures existed, the file containing my entire life.» I said seriously and pulled the box closer to my chest as my heart started beating faster in mu chest.

«Why?» Emily asked shaking her head slowly, tears prickling her eyes. «Why did we do something bad? We were just trying to find bits and pieces from your entire life to give you, Mel. We didn't mean to start something.»

She walked around the counter and stopped at the edge of it, changing her mind about where she was going.

«And I said thank you, but I still want that file. I'm eighteen now, it belongs to me.» I explained but Emily still didn't understand. She still looked at me as if I was trying to make his life worse on purpose. «I'm not trying to be difficult, I just need that file.» I licked my lips, still seeing the incredulous stares they were giving me. The blaming eyes. «You don't understand what it's like to have your life crammed into a folder for everyone to see, it's been haunting me all my life.»

Emily sighed bending her head backwards and folding her arms over her chest. There was a tension spreading in the room, like smoke coming out of my body, slipping into every crack in the worn out house. We weren't getting rid of it. It had settled, like a mould living beneath the wallpaper. A constant reminder of how things would never be as they should be.

«It's hers, Emily, she should have it,» Sam said suddenly, his voice stiffer than usual, but also much calmer than it had been before. I stared at him and let my face fall in front of them, sadness replacing the otherwise void expression I was sporting, and Sam suddenly changed.

«I don't know what it's like to have grown up like you, Mel. I shouldn't decide what you can or can't be exposed to,» He looked at Emily now, a gentle smile playing at his lips as he tried to change her attitude with a glance. «We should have given you the folder a long time ago.» Emily's jaw tightened as she bit down into nothing. The tenseness in her body was obvious, but her lips still stretched slightly upwards, pretending to smile. Pretending to agree with Sam.

In a sudden rush of sad and happy emotions I felt my eyes fill with tears, and I told them something I'd promised myself not to say now.

«Thank you, guys, for everything you've done for me. I know I don't ever seem it, but I'm so grateful.»

And that's how I ended up sitting around a bonfire with my friends sticking page after page from the file into the flames and letting them devour the very existence of my life in foster care. The curious case of Melanie Boston could no longer be read about, no longer be found. Now it was mine and I was destroying it with every ounce of will power I had. Of course I'd read through it first, I had torn out the pages I needed or wanted, and the rest… the rest was burning, disappearing into nothingness.

«Happy birthday, Mel,» Paul whispered next to me. His arm was around my shoulder and the rest of the pack was situated around the fire. Kim was snuggling with Jared under a blanket, Quil was laughing at something stupid Embry had said, and Embry was sending me cautious looks every now and then. Seth had forced Leah out on the beach to play some football one on one, and for the first time ever I saw Leah relax. Everyone was smiling, enjoying themselves, everyone except Jacob, Sam and Emily. They were out on patrol while Emily had complained about it being cold and walked back into the house. She'd made an effort though. Cooked food for everyone and tried her best to put on a smile for as long as she could.

«Thanks,» I said as the beaten folder with my name on was thrown into the fire as the last piece of foster care. I watched it convulse in the heat and the flames grabbing at it hungrily, forcing it into oblivion. It felt good. I was freeing myself from the grips of my past. Kind of.

«I have something for you,» Paul spoke, and shuffled next to me, pulling out a black box with a large pink bow on it. I raised my eyebrows immediately reading into it.

«If you don't like it you don't have to keep it, I just thought… I thought you deserved something nice,» he looked at me nervously, hands twitching, and handed me the box carefully. It was square, about ten centimeters each way and flat. I looked at him, feeling tears well in my eyes. From him I struggled so hide.

My fingers gripped at the opening and I let my eyes travel across the contents beneath the lid. It was a necklace shaped like a heart with the faint markings of a tree on it. It couldn't be more than half a cm in diameter, but it was absolutely stunning. «Paul it's beautiful,» I whispered and turned to him immediately, kissing him quickly. «Help me put it on,» I said and placed the box in my lap before scooping out the necklace and giving it to him. He locked it up behind my hair.

«I'm glad you like it, Mel,» he smiled and once more put his arm around me, squeezing me from the side.

It had been a good day, all in all. Everyone was trying. Including myself. I felt more fulfilled than I had in a long time. Paul was a big reason for that happening, but I knew that most of it was because I'd grown. Because I'd changed.

The day had been over in a blink of an eye, and the sun had risen again. I'd done it now, I'd thrown them off my scent for a while. Everyone had been given a feeling of gratitude. Everyone had seen me happy. Everything had gone according to plan, and now it was time to move on to the next part. Now it was time to disappear.