Disclaimer: I don't own Gintama. It belongs to Sorachi Hideaki.

Of Adultery and Space Travel

Chapter 5

Seeing the look of confusion and despair in the younger Okita's face made Okita Kagura feel sorry for the younger man. Even in their timeline, no one had expected the two of them to end up together, much less picture them dating and officially getting together by including her in his family registry.

But then again, their relationship hadn't been smooth-sailing since the beginning, and it was evident on how the younger ones interacted, especially since he couldn't help but insult her, while her younger counterpart couldn't control her temper and humored him by fighting back.

"Problem? You look like you wanna say something." she said out loud, giving him a look, as if to challenge him to say what he wanted to voice out, but couldn't do so. "Humor me." she added.

The younger one shrugged. "Still can't figure out how you two ended up together. Did you knock her up or something?" he asked, the question aimed at the older man.

Bakaiser expected the crude retort and shook his head. "And if you're wondering if she did some devious scheme to entrap me, nope. She's not that clever." he dodged a punch that went his way. "I wasn't insulting you, believe me."

"Oh, shut it, you jerk." she said, irritated at the glint in his eyes as his lips slowly curved into a smile.

"Kidding." he pressed a quick kiss on her forehead, earning a wince from the younger male. "What, you're still at the stage wherein you think girls have some kind of disease? What the hell happened to you?!"

"That's what you get for living in a compound full of men for most of your life." the older Kagura chuckled.

"I do not have that mindset!" the younger one said hotly as he glared at the duo, who were smirking.

"Guess so. I mean, you did stalk me at that age-"

"I'm not stalking anyone!" he yelled.

"Okay, okay, no need to get your boxers in a bunch." the older Kagura said. "Besides, we don't wanna scare her, right?"

Just before he could ask who she meant, footsteps could be heard on corridor leading to his room...

... And it turned out to be China.

Shit.

"Sadist, Gorilla's calling for you."

Immediately, the two male Okitas in the room looked at her, giving her a puzzled look. "Which one?" the younger one asked. As soon as she shrugged, he shook his head. "How smart of you not to ask for the specifics."

"Like I care about your predicament." she stuck out her tongue at him, complete with her pulling the skin under her lower eyelid.

"How mature of you to stick out your tongue." he rolled his eyes. "You're such a kid."

"Says the guy who is called 'brat' by his future self." she smirked, sticking out her middle finger at him.

Immediately, the younger Okita charged at her, ready to attack her, when the older version of him grabbed his arm. "Okay kids, break it up. You, stop provoking her." to Kagura, he flashed a grin. "Don't rise to his baits. He's just being a jerk."

To everyone's surprise, the younger female Yato suddenly turned red and looked like she was going to fall down to her knees. Immediately, she covered her face and turned away, obviously embarrassed. Concerned, her older counterpart went up to her, and all signs of hostility from early had vanished as soon as the older woman asked her what was wrong.

"I-Is he..."

"Is he... what?" older Kagura frowned.

"... S-sadist... really isn't gonna be... as... handsome as... that guy... right?"

At this, the older Kagura grinned. "... Ooh, you have a crush on my husband, huh?"

"N-NO! No I don't!" if it was even possible, Kagura's face turned redder than before. "N-no way!"

"It's okay~" replied her older counterpart in a sing-song tone. "For once, be honest with yourself."

"NO!" she screamed. "I do not like him!" Kagura pointed at Okita who was still being held by Bakaiser. "NO WAY! I WON'T ALLOW IT!"

"Oh geez, little girl, chill the fuck out. It's my husband you have a crush on, not this scrawny little brat." she pointed at the younger Okita, who had glared at her and raised his middle finger in response. "See? That's the reason why she hates you."

"I don't care if she hates me." he huffed. "It's been that way ever since, and nothing's gonna change that."

At this, Bakaiser laughed. "Yeah, and you're gonna die a virgin."

The older Kagura snorted at the statement and nearly fell down on her knees, laughing her heart out. "That's the saddest thing I've ever heard!" to Bakaiser, she said, "Well, at least you won't die a virgin."

"Obviously, you divested that from me when I was 20. Better late than never." he winked.

At this, Okita Sougo blanched. "Can we stop talking about that and just go to the meeting room?!" he was nearly at his breaking point, and if he heard another person say something about him and his China one more time-

... Where the hell did that come from?! She wasn't his China!

"We're going on ahead." Bakaiser said, interrupting his thoughts as he draped his cloak over the older woman's shoulders. "See ya."

"And don't fight." the older woman reminded, looking at them both. "For once, at least keep all that sexual tension through words-"

"Sexual tension my ass!" they bellowed, making the older pair laugh.

"Anyway, see you, kids." the two bid farewell and made their way to the meeting room.

"Was it... safe to leave them alone?"

"I'm sure they won't be banging that way." the male assured her, making her snort. "Seriously speaking, it'll be fine. We acted like... mentors, at least." he nearly said 'parents', which would be weird, since the two of them didn't act like parents towards the teenagers at all.

"Guess so... but those two..." Kagura sighed. "I wonder..."

"Wonder what?"

"If they're grossed out with this whole situation and decide to stay away from each other until they die."

Okita shrugged. "I don't give a fuck if they end up together or not-"

"Hey!"

"-'cause too bad for them, they won't know what they'll be missing. And besides, in my timeline..." at this, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her into his arms. "... I ended up with you."

"... Tch. Stop being so cheesy!" she said, pushing him away, though her face was beet red.

"How uncute." he tsked. "For once, be honest with yourself-" he was suddenly cut off when she grabbed the collar of his uniform and forced a kiss on his lips. As soon as they pulled apart after trying to dominate one another with their mouths, Sougo was smirking.

"Well, that escalated quickly." he said, placing a hand under her chin and running his thumb over her lips. "You getting hot again?"

"... What if I am..."

"That can be arranged." Just as soon as he was about to put her into the nearby room, they heard footsteps coming their way...

... and it just so happened to be their younger counterparts, who were now racing their way through the corridors. Or rather, the girl was doing the chasing while the Shinsengumi captain was running away as fast as he could as the girl kept screaming expletives at him. "Come back here, you asshole!" when he ignored her, she stopped, threw her right shoulder back, and threw her trusty umbrella at his direction.

Fortunately for the younger Kagura, it did hit its target... but at the expense of destroying the room that Bakaiser and the older Kagura planned to enter, as well as the nearby surroundings. It looked like a tornado had passed by the vicinity as the wooden corridor looked like it had been run through the ground.

The older couple sighed.

Kids.

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