We do this not as Pitch fans but as the Spirit of Winter, Guardian of Fun a.k.a. Jack Frost fans. A good friend of mine and I have decided that we will get over our overly-hyper selves by creating these scenes and sometimes, multi-chapter short stories... PLEASE BE REMINDED: We do not do this to indicate we're the owners of the movie/book. Hell no. We're doing this because we're purely fans of this movie and books and we do not own the Rise of the Guardians in any way. Only this plot, parts of it actually.

So before we start, first thing's first. EACH CHAPTER WILL HAVE ONE ENTRY OF THE BOOK AND A STORY BASED ON IT. Please enjoy and comment.

Ways to Torture and/or Exterminate the Guardians (specifically that annoying white-haired kid called Jack Frost)

This book is created for entertainment and I suppose, an excellent source of methods to destroy the guardians. My friends, I am called Pitch Black, or what the man in the moon calls, the Boogeyman. Boogeyman? Why would I be called something that ridiculous such as the Boogeyman? Well… the moon said so.

I've come up with a few reasons of why I despise the hateful Jack Frost. (In alphabetical order…)

-Annoying

-Boastful

-Catastrophic

-Disgustingly Happy

-Extremely Annoying

-Feeble-minded

-Gabbling

-Half-Baked

-Irresponsible

-Japing

-Kill-joy (For me anyway…)

-Loathsome

-Moronic

-Nosy

-Obnoxious

-Pitiful

-Quizzical

-Really Annoying

-Snide

-Teasing

-Unfair

-Very Annoying

-Weak-minded

(There is no need for a word with 'X'…)

-Yellow (as in the cowardly way.)

-Zany

As you can you can see I am very vengeful for Jack Frost. I'll tell you why… Never mind maybe some other time… I have a busy schedule, you know torturing the guardians, cleaning my dark fortress… all those things. Maybe I should start with this bag of salt…

It was pretty normal day for Jack Frost. Being kicked out of North's workshop for accidentally knocking over a HUGE assortment of Phil's toy robots while elf-bowling his final strike to win. Really, it wasn't his fault. At least, Jack thought it wasn't. Jack swore that the elf he was bowling with stuck his tongue out at him before knocking over the robots.

Jack tried to have fun with his friend, the Easter Bunny. But as soon as he got in to one of the Bunny's tunnels, a totem egg appeared and kicked him out as well. Just his luck. He did try to visit the Sandman… but he didn't know where Sandy lived. Then the wind carried him over to Tooth's palace.

Tooth was more than happy to see him, or rather his teeth. Baby Tooth was too busy but, she stopped for a quick hello. The other fairies started to swoon, Jack decided to leave before he got stampeded.

It was then that Jack finalized to go to Burgess and play with his first believer, Jamie Bennett. When he got there, classes were still in session and Jack didn't want to disturb them, having earlier in the week, told by Jamie, that he liked school.

Jack didn't really have any thing important to do at the moment, so he decided to do what he did best. Mess around. With a tap of his staff on the road, black ice formed. He chucked a few snowballs here and there, maybe accidentally hitting some elders in the process. Then he proceeded to somewhat freeze the gas pumps, just for a little fun and entertainment to see the peoples' faces. As he did this, Canadian geese were flying towards a warmer destination. His face lit up as he flew towards them and poked one of them on the rear. The goose honked with a bit of shock and changed its direction to the hysterical laughing figure behind him. As it was, for a few minutes, Jack had the whole pack playing tag with him, unwilling so.

Being goose-chased (quite literally), time seemed to 'fly' by. Jack went back to Jamie's elementary school to see if school was out yet. Although, when he landed on the ground, he felt a burning sensation at his feet, almost as if his feet were on fire. With a yelp, he jumped off the side walk and on to the road… which also had the same result. Balancing on one foot, he checked to see if he stepped on anything and all he could see was little white pebbles. Wondering what it was, Jack picked one up and dropped it almost immediately as it seemed to be like acid.

Jack frantically hopped or rather half-flew away from the strange substance. As his feet touched another ground, it had the same effect. The further he got from the school, it seemed to increase dramatically, especially on driveways and roads. With another attempt, Jack settled down in an alley, the only seemingly safe place for his feet to cool off.

Quite afraid the pebbles, he stumbled further in to the alleyway where there were none of them on the ground.

"Oh, you poor thing. Are your feet hurting? Poor Jamie will be devastated that you can't touch the ground." A dark voice came out of nowhere.

Jack swiftly turned around with a slight wince to face the voice. "Pitch…"

"Yes it's me. Who else would hide in an alley way?" the shadow seemed to have a smirk on his face.

"You did this to me didn't you!" Jack fumed quietly.

"Did what?" Pitch feigned innocently.

"This! These pebble things!" Jack furiously gestured to his feet.

"Pebble things?" Pitch chuckled with a bit of sarcasm in his tone. "Not very convincing, are you?"

Jack snorted. Pitch stared at him for a moment before sighing. "You mean the salt? Oh no, I didn't do that."

"I don't believe you." Jack frowned.

"You never have." Pitch said amusingly. "Ah, so it is the salt! That… is what humans put on their driveways, roads, sidewalks and parking lots during the winter so they don't slip."

Jack raised an eyebrow.

"The salt dissolves the ice and snow. Which, would be you."

Jack pretended he hadn't heard, and scraped even more fiercely at his feet because of the salt. After a few seconds of scratching the bottom of his feet, he moved to his clothes and pretended to dust them off.

One of Pitch's eyebrows twitched. "In which case, I have, right here."

Jack nonchalantly looked at Pitch with the still raised eyebrow. "Is that a threat?"

Pitch glared with annoyance. "Yes. Yes, it is." With that, he threw salt towards the teenager.

Jack scowled slightly at the reappearance of the white pebbles. He tensed as it flew towards him. In his mind, a mental image of himself with searing red skin appeared. Panicking, he raised his staff a little higher.

It was a tense moment before the salt reached its destination… Not at Jack… but a few feet before him. Jack, being all tense, immediately laughed at Pitch's supposed throw.

Pitch stared at the salt. He quickly recovered by saying something scientific, "Apparently… rock salts' masses are heavier than I thought…"

"Maybe it's just your pathetic aim," Jack managed to say mockingly through fits of laughter. His breathing evened as he eventually got his laughter under (some) control. With a few bursts of laughter still, he taunted. "I must thank you for the info. Now, I know not to touch the ground when I'm playing with Jamie in the winter. Ta ta, now~!"

With those words, Jack flew off back towards Jamie's school.

Pitch just stood there fuming silently. "Come back, you coward…!" He shouted to Jack.

Jack cocked his head sideways as if confused. "What?" Then he thought to himself before having a laughter fit in the sky.

'Your pathetic aim… PITCH, I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU CAN'T EVEN THROW TINY ROCKS PROPERLY! …And to think you're the King of Nightmares…'

CONGRATS TO YOU FOR READING TO THE END…!

You know that you're a Rise of the Guardians fan when…

1. Whenever you see salt on the ground, you start picking or kicking pieces off the ground to clear space for Jack Frost.

This series of random one-shots, two-shots and maybe three-shots is the kind of series where people can request the stories. We do not guarantee we'll do them as quickly as you send them or even the next chapter after that. If there are no requests, we will keep up with random ideas that pop up in our heads.

We do hope you enjoyed this chapter and we sincerely wish that you would review or comment for the sake of improving, praising or criticizing our story. Thank you, and have a nice day.