Guess who decided to continue this, wrote one chapter at the beginning of the month then got writer's block? :) I'll try to whack out a couple more but no promises. Anyway, here it is, for your viewing pleasure :) Please review and HAPPY CHRISTMASSSSS :D

7- Santa Baby

The annual Stark Industries Christmas Fundraiser attracted hundreds of people from everywhere, members of SI and their families, foster homes and orphanages, businessmen from across the globe and their families, students, lucky competition winners, musicians, actors, basically everyone came.

Including, of course, the Avengers. Although for a few of them it wasn't so much by choice as it was being bribed/forced/threatened to go.

'This party is more crazy than Gatsby's,' Clint pointed out, glass in hand, scrutinising all the guests.

'You should have seen our Malibu Christmas Party seven years ago,' Tony informed him, who was watching Johnny Depp chatting to George Clooney and was trying to think of the best way to ask for an autograph without sounding too much like a fanboy (which he totally was) 'I mean… wow.'

'She looks really pretty doesn't she?' Clint said, looking dreamily at Natasha who was wearing a pretty black cocktail dress with sequins and chatting to Elton John.

'Yeah,' Tony said, who was in fact looking at Pepper who was looking stunning in a knee length blue dress and laughing with James Franco and Michael Bublé. Unfortunately not the blue dress, but still gorgeous.

The two women spotted the men watching them and stalked over, Clint and Tony immediately pretended to be engaged in conversation.

'Nice try boys,' Pepper said, hands on hips.

'Oh hi, honey,' Tony said, like he'd just seen her there. 'Where did you come from?'

Pepper rolled her eyes and grabbed his hand. 'You promised me a dance, and FYI if you leave me on a rooftop again you're not getting laid until next Christmas.'

'Yes, ma'am,' came the reply.

'Enjoying yourself?' Clint asked, who knew that Natasha had a soft spot for Christmas.

'Maybe a little,' she replied, lifting a glass of Candy Cane cocktail from a passing waiter's tray. 'These are helping.'

'I know you're Russian and don't think you're a lightweight, but Nat, and I mean this in the nicest way, you really are.'

'Says the guy that had a shot of tequila and immediately passed out on the sofa?'

'It was straight tequila mixed with whatever Stark put in it!

'Fair point, aren't you going to ask me to dance?'

An eyebrow was raised. 'You hate dancing.'

'I'm drunk remember?'

'Yes ma'am,' Clint said, taking her hand and leading her to the dance floor.

XxXxXxX

Meanwhile, Thor was posing by the Christmas tree with various small children stood on his shoulders and his head, a Santa hat jammed firmly on his head. (Tony may or may not have told him that it was compulsory for visitors to Earth to wear one)

'Are you sure they're safe up there?' one of the mothers asked, wincing at her four year old son standing on Thor's head.

'I assure you my lady; your child has never been safer.'

The mother flushed bright red, she says it's because it's hot in the hall, but being called a lady by the Norse God of Thunder probably had something to do with it.

'Speak of Bree and Cheddar,' Thor told the child as they posed so the mother could take a photo.

'Say cheese,' Tony translated as he danced by with Pepper.

XxXxXxX

In another corner of the room, Bruce and Steve were watching the dancing couples and the excited children in their pretty outfits running around; giggling and playing hide and seek under the tables. There had been an attempt to teach Steve how to dance the night before, which had been deemed by nearly all involved a spectacular failure, but it had been fun trying.

'How is she doing that thing… with her foot…' Steve said, gesturing at a brunette which on close examination turned out to be Catherine Zeta Jones.

'We went over this yesterday, it's called the tango,' Bruce informed him.

'Oh, I knew that,' Steve said defensively.

'Of course you did, buddy,' Bruce responded.

'Hey you two, hiding in the corner, too scared to dance?' Darcy said, sidling up to them with a glass of champagne in her hand.

'I thought I'd leave it for now,' Steve said. 'Last night wasn't exactly successful.'

'You did fine, you only stepped on my foot ten times,' Darcy said shrugging. 'That's not too bad.'

'Yeah, and you only stepped on Pepper's foot 8 times and Natasha's foot 12,' Bruce encouraged him.

'Is that supposed to help?' Steve said. 'That gives me a total of 30 feet that got stamped.'

'Spread out across 3 women,' Darcy said. 'I'm telling you that could have been worse.'

'Are you seriously hiding in the corner?' Jane asked, appearing suddenly over Steve's left shoulder from where she'd been engaged in a discussion with Professor Brian Cox.

'That's what I said!' Darcy exclaimed.

'Well Thor is letting kids use him as a climbing frame so I guess you're going to have to dance with me,' Jane told Steve matter-of-factly.

'I'm really not sure that's a good idea,' Steve protested.

'You know the basics, my feet are made of steel, and it's very impolite to refuse an offer of a dance when a lady asks you,' Jane told him firmly.

'Truth,' Darcy said. 'FYI, it doesn't work the other way round. Ladies get to say no as much as they want.'

'I really don't think…'

'Great, I love this song,' Jane said, grabbing Steve and dragging him to the dance floor before he could finish protesting.

'How about it green guy?' Darcy asked Bruce. 'I want to watch Steve, see if anything we taught him last night sunk in.'

'Apparently declining would be impolite, so why not,' Bruce agreed.

XxXxXxX

'Is that Steve dancing with Jane?' Pepper asked, peering over Tony's Armani-clad shoulder.

'Where?!' Tony exclaimed, spinning her round so he could see for himself. 'Oh wow.'

Then they both winced. 'Well that's foot stomp number one,' Pepper said. 'He's gone bright pink.'

'Jane tells me her feet are made of steel,' Tony informed her. 'So she should be okay.'

'It would be wrong to spy on them, wouldn't it?' Pepper said.

'Would it though?'

'That's what I thought.'

Sneakily, the two of them danced that little bit closer so they could spy.

XxXxXxX

'Don't look now, but I think that's Steve dancing with Jane,' Natasha said.

'Looks like Pepperony have spotted them as well,' came the response from Clint. 'Wanna get closer?'

'I thought you'd never ask.'

XxXxXxX

'I'm not doing too bad, right?' Steve asked nervously.

'You're doing great, 3 foot stomps in ten minutes is a vast improvement from yesterday,' Jane reassured him.

'And now a special request, please put your dancing shoes on for the foxtrot!' called the conductor.

'Um… I don't know how to foxtrot,' Steve said.

'I do, I'll show you, it's easy,' Jane assured him.

'We're all rooting for you,' Clint winked as he effortlessly danced Natasha passed him.

'Remind me to hide his bow when this is over,' Steve grunted.

A few dances in, Steve was beginning to think he was getting the hang of it. Thor came over to pinch Jane away then he ended up dancing with Pepper while Tony posed with the kids and eventually he was dancing with Natasha towards the end of the night while the rest of the Avengers had at least three children each clinging to them.

'So? How did I do?' he asked.

'Very well,' the red-head replied, who had downed two pints of water and was feeling a little bit more with it. 'We're all very impressed.'

'Why thank you ma'am,' Steve said, grinning from ear to ear. 'Maybe I did enjoy myself a little.'

'Spangles! Natashalie! Photo time!' Tony yelled from the Christmas tree, where a dozen small children (and a couple of teenagers, the majority of which were flirting with the four of them) were hopping excitedly from foot to foot.

'Alright, Shellhead, keep your iron underpants on!' Steve yelled back, well used to the nicknames. A few of the children laughed at the nickname and started chanting 'SHELLHEAD SHELLHEAD' at Tony who mockingly clasped his chest and tried to look upset (the smile on his lips ruined it though).

At some point during the evening, Santa had arrived and was now sat on a comfy armchair with several children around him. Tony and Bruce had adopted a back-to-back James Bond pose with fingers made into guns, which several of the younger ones had adopted. Thor's Santa hat was still firmly on his head and he had two children on each of his broad shoulders and one on his head. Natasha joined Clint and the two of them scrambled up the Christmas tree and perched on the lower branches with tinsel draped around their necks. Bruce and Steve decided to adopt the '80s-sitcom-about-two-roommates-who-can't-agree-on-anything' pose from How I Met Your Mother and the camera snapped the picture (which was viral on Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr e.t.c in seconds).

Once the children had their hugs and autographs and pictures (including Tony's autograph/picture combo from George Clooney and Johnny Depp) everyone had left and the cleaning crew had arrived the Avengers decided to retire to the penthouse, put their Christmas onesies on (they had Christmas onesies, blame Darcy) and collapsed onto the sofa with a plate of mince pies to watch A Muppet's Christmas Carol.

'So, my dancing, thoughts?' Steve asked tentatively.

'Could have been worse,' said Clint.

'You did great,' Pepper said, throwing a pillow at Hawkeye.

'So… that picture of us just got edited,' Tony said, amused.

'Bring it up,' Natasha said.

The picture was projected onto the wall and the team was impressed to find some truly A+ Photoshop skills which had edited out the children and edited in Santa outfits and Christmas hats.

'Nice,' Pepper said. 'JARVIS, set that as my desktop background for my laptop.'

'Will do, Ms Potts.'

'I approve,' Clint said nodding. 'Also, why do you still have that hat on your head, Thor? Isn't your head hot?'

'tis true, my hair is sweating like Volstagg in a dress,' Thor agreed.

'You were wearing it all evening? Any particular reason?' Natasha asked.

(Tony made himself very small)

'The Man of Iron said it was customary for visitors to Earth to wear a Santa hat,' Thor said confused.

Pillows were thrown at the aforementioned Man of Iron who soon couldn't be seen. Then Clint sat on him and they all heard the oof as the air was driven out of him.

'Thanks guys, very mature,' was the response from the buried Armoured Avenger.

'Sssh, we're trying to watch TV,' Natasha said, and that was that.

Please review! :D