Author's Note: Hello readers, this is my first foray into the glee fandom. Lately I've become such a nerd about all things Brittana, they really are addictive! Hope this story brings joy to some readers like it did to me when I was writing it, constructive criticism is always welcome, and I hope I did some of our favourite characters justice! -gurj14

Disclaimer: I do not own glee or it's characters.

PART ONE

/

Instrumental

/

Brittany S. Pierce thought blind dates were a stupid idea, because if you couldn't see the person you were dating then how could you decide whether they were hot enough or cute enough to have sex with?

Then Quinn calmly explained to her that blind dates just meant you didn't know the person until you met them. It was hit and miss, or something like that.

Why were they called 'blind' dates then? She still didn't quite get it, but her mother and father were upset when Brittany drunkenly spilled how many one night stands she had a year so she was willing to try it out and make them feel better. She wasn't a slut, she just liked sex.

So, here she was, about to embark on her very first blind date. Between her dancing career which just finished with the tour of her life in Europe – it was fucking awesome – and her secret identity as a member of New Directions – the famous group of super-human beings that saved the planet, which if you didn't know then kill yourself! – Brittany had trouble finding someone to date instead of just hooking up with.

She liked sex and she could always find herself some sex, but, yeah, a relationship would be nice. All of her friends were members of New Directions and she needed something that was hers and special and… so she signed up for some kind of online blind dating pool.

She told Quinn she was feeling super horny and that's why she picked a lesbian dating site, and then Rachel ranted on and on about how commitment was more likely with lesbians anyways because of something to do with a 'U-Haul' but Brittany really only picked a lesbian one because she was super drunk last month and had sex with Artie and it was so bad she felt like stopping sex altogether. Since sex and dating weren't like, the same thing, she was very excited to start dating.

Cue her blind date sign-up, and she was e-mailed about meeting a female accountant within twenty-four hours. She sounded totally boring, but Brittany was curious and excited to start dating. Her mom was also super pumped, although she kept telling Brittany that while women were great and she was totally cool with her daughter's bisexuality, getting a man was the better choice and they could get naturally pregnant.

Brittany totally accepted the e-mail right away to meet with the female accountant. She didn't want to be thinking about babies.

"Good evening Miss, do you have a reservation?" The smiling hostess in black finally noticed that Brittany had been standing at the restaurant 'please wait to be seated' sign for the last ten minutes.

"Um… yeah, I'm supposed to meet a-" she looks at what she had written down on her hand, "—Santana Lo…pez?"

"Oh yes, right this way," the hostess's back straightens and she twirls on her heels to guide Brittany through the busy restaurant.

Brittany follows the hostess and she can't help but smile when, as they pass a group of guys enjoying whatever is on tap, she's checked out. She knows she's hot, it's always been her best quality, but a little outside appreciation is always welcome. She saves the world in her spare time, the least the world can do in return is appreciate her hotness.

Rachel tried to make her wear a longer dress but there was a reason Rachel didn't get hit on as much as Brittany. When she said that, Rachel started crying about her latest breakup with Finn so Brittany had to calm her down and then gave Rachel the number of a really great guy she kept for booty calls, her dance friend Brody.

She is led behind a curtain which is pretty awesome, and the inside is cozy and intimate… Brittany raises her eyebrows, unimpressed with the candles and the obvious romance of it all because she would prefer to just sit out in the open like everyone else, but then she sees what her date Santana Lopez looks like and she's speechless.

Super. Hot.

She's a few inches shorter but so gorgeous that Brittany feels two feet tall.

"Thank you Joyce, let Ralph know my date is here and bring us one of my best reds." Santana, dressed sinfully in a dark navy dress, dismisses the hostess and then stops in front of Brittany with a charming smile. "Santana Lopez, hope you don't mind this set up."

Brittany flushes because Santana smells delicious. Like, she wants to sniff those armpits kind of delicious. That mocha skin looks totally delicious.

"I'm Brittany S. Peirce, and I did think it was lame but you have some time to redeem yourself." Her voice still works, thank God. She wants to have sex with this woman. ASAP. It's good to know Artie didn't ruin her libido after all.

Santana laughs as they shake hands and then she pulls out one of the two chairs and nods, "I'll bring out everything I've got, then. Please, have a seat."

Brittany lets herself be tucked in like a princess and she promises to never tease Rachel Berry and her list of 'gentleman musts on dates' ever again. This shit is charming; especially from a smoking hot woman that has the softest looking skin and the most kissable lips and also smells really good.

Santana takes the seat opposite her and leans back in her chair, "you look lovely tonight."

Brittany giggles, but not a girly-childish giggle, one of her sexy and throatier giggles. The kinds of giggles you use when seducing someone are super important, so she brings out her big guns because she wants to seduce.

"Thank you, so do you."

Santana's chuckle is really sexy. Brittany is totally seduced. She hopes hers worked the same way.

"So, you're a dancer?"

A man in a butler's vest and bowtie appears with a bottle of red and pours them each a glass, and Brittany grins when some salad is soon placed in front of her.

"Are you seriously pulling out a three course meal? On a first date?" She doesn't care about money, really, because she can support herself just fine… but Santana seems pretty wealthy because she got them a private part of a busy restaurant and set up this whole dinner and she doesn't want to some across like she's willing to have sex because of that.

Santana spears a grape tomato and shrugs, "I eat this way, I've been lucky with my business decisions. Hope that's not a problem."

It really isn't.

/

Soprano

/

"Thirty! It's evaded us thirty fucking times!"

Fire flew furiously out of Q's hands and Kurt, known as Metal Boy, squealed at her and held his hands protectively over his head, "watch out for my hair, why don't you!"

"Not my fault you wear so much hairspray," Quinn calmed down a bit, "that stuff is flammable and I am all flames."

"Wonderful quip," Gold Star rolled her eyes before sighing dramatically, "that MONSTER needs to be captured, people! Quinn is absolutely right. It's a shame my psychic prognosis can't seem to affect it."

"Thank you, Rachel, for that obvious comment," Vixen crossed her arms when Rachel pouted and addressed all of her teammates seated around the large round table at New Directions Headquarters. "You know what it did? That crazy thing grabbed Puck then bowled me and Mike over."

Mike, the hero known as Flashdance who could run so fast it was a blur, nodded morosely. He should have been able to dodge it. "That juice, that goddamn cement goop!"

"Speak for yourself Mercedes," Puck flushed at the reminder that he, the strongest man alive known to the world by his titles Guns, had once again be tossed like a sack of potatoes by the ugliest monster they had ever faced. "That thing is a fucking freak of evil."

"Guys, calm down okay?" Finn took off his mask so he was no longer Phoenix, and tried to get everyone back on the same level. "Tina managed to prevent half of the heist."

Tina, the kung-fu prodigy known as Bloodsucker, looked like she was going to cry, "thanks Finn but that's only because I faced henchman that couldn't even throw a real punch. Face it, that thing out-smarted us again! At least last time I almost cut off its shoulder, this time I couldn't even get within ten feet!"

"Hey, my electricity injured it," Sam, their Livewire, insisted. "I'm sure Artie can come up with some new experiment to see what might injure it. Brittany managed to bind it longer this time."

All eyes turned to the blonde in question who looked so furious she was practically frothing at the mouth. It was terrifying and numbed them all because Brittany never got furious.

"It kicked a puppy," her lip quivered and everyone (even the boys) gasped at the thought. "How cruel and evil can it be to kick a puppy?!"

"Oookay," Large Z, awkwardly patted Brittany's shoulder, "so I guess we're all on the same page then?"

"What page is that, Lauren," Quinn grumbled, still pissed off at the fact that a criminal had humiliated them all.

Again.

And again.

"That we need to make taking down that fucking ugly-ass monster thing a priority. All those in favour?"

Eleven hands shot up and Quinn grinned, "let's take down Snix."

"And avoid the Snix-juice," Mike added.

/

Tenor

/

Santana frowned into her phone, holding back the yell that was erupting because she was in a public area, so she hissed as angrily as she could, "goddamn it Jesse, those henchmen were fucking useless! All twenty of them got their asses handed to them by the Asian chick that wears black!"

Jesse St. James, another criminal extraordinaire, tells her that the chick is called Bloodsucker.

"I don't fucking care what her name is, especially if it's that stupid! I'm not paying you this time you little shit!"

He's getting mad because everyone in the criminal world has probably overheard how she managed to get three-hundred million worth of goods out from New Direction's obnoxious world-saving noses.

A flash of familiar blonde hair catches Santana's eye and she feels a genuine smile grace her lips when the blonde notices her and waves before rushing across the street towards her.

"I'll send you a small transfer, St. James, but our dealings are through. I'm retiring."

She hangs up her phone and disengages the voice modifier that she had plugged in so her voice sounded deeper.

She quickly crushes the metal devices together because after her loot of a lifetime she's looking to stop her life of crime and focus on the blonde and beautiful things in her life. They clunk in the street trashcan with finality.

All of her tension drops as pale pink lips press against her own in a familiar greeting, much sweeter after last night's lovemaking.

That amazing night was the reason Santana had decided she wanted to be worthy of this creature. Hence the early retirement plan and heist of her life four hours ago.

From now on, she was just wealthy accountant Santana Lopez who owned a lot of property and invested well. Her secret stash of criminal wealth was a safety net – her criminal trophy to keep hidden.

"Sorry, I know I'm late," Brittany was apologizing, "but it's been such a frustrating day."

Santana grins and leans in for another kiss, "don't worry about it. Shall we?"

They link arms and enter the movie theatre, but Santana tugs Brittany away from the box office and towards the concession stands.

"I bought our tickets already," she explains.

Brittany rolls her eyes, "I'm not surprised. You need to stop that, okay?"

"I'll let you buy my food," Santana offers as the line moves forward. "I'll have buttery popcorn and coke."

"Ooh, we can share, because I like those too!" Brittany tugs on Santana's hand and goes to the available cashier. She orders the largest popcorn and the largest drink and then pokes two straws in and shoves the drink in Santana's hands, impish and gorgeous.

Santana is so in love.

"What are we watching again?" Brittany follows Santana into auditorium number seven after Santana hands over their tickets.

"That animated film, Wreck-something or another."

"Wreck-it Ralph?" Brittany smiles in surprise, "you said animated films were dumb, and I quote."

"Yeah well," Santana avoids eye contact, "they can't be if you like them, Britt. I'm revising my statement."

They're sitting at the back of the theatre and the lights are already dimming. Brittany feels her insides melt, "you're the sweetest woman, Santana, I promise not to tell."

Santana grins, her teeth noticeable even in the dark but thankfully her blush still secret. Brittany takes her mouth in a passionate kiss so that the other woman understands just how much she is appreciated in that moment.

Brittany too feels all the tension of her day leave her shoulders.

She had seen a monster kick a puppy earlier that day, but then her faith in the good of humanity was restored every time she was with Santana. Of course the big, ten-foot ugly hairy monster Snix was hardly human and Santana was like a sex goddess so there really was no comparison.

/

Soprano

/

"Valentine's Day is a stupid holiday," Puck sneers at Kurt who just rolls his eyes and continues to savour the chocolates he got from his boyfriend.

"You're just jealous Puck," Rachel giggled herself out of Finn's lips and challenged her fellow Jew with raised eyebrows. "And no, I didn't use my psychic abilities to find that out, you're just that obvious."

Finn and Rachel being back together in time for Valentine's Day was making everyone roll their eyes. Except for one Brittany who was red in the cheeks and on cloud nine.

"Santana got me a diamond necklace, see?" Brittany interjects, holding the thing off of her neck shyly. "What do you think that means?"

"Damn girl, you must be something in the sack," Mercedes sighs wistfully, "I wish someone would buy me a diamond necklace."

"Not all of us are as wealthy as accountant Santana Lopez," Sam defends his purchase of red roses and chocolates.

"I'm only teasing baby," Mercedes immediately calms him down, hoping she didn't hurt his feelings.

Quinn is looking critically at the necklace. "She must really like you, Brittany, I'm happy for you… but she makes a lot of money for an accountant."

"Suspicious." Puck chimes.

"Greedy." Tina catches on to everybody's teasing.

"She's just clever with money and-and she's a philanthropist!" Brittany defends her girlfriend.

"Do you even know what the means?"

Everyone is silent after Artie's statement and Brittany glares at him and his stupid need to be mean to her after she dumped him.

Brittany doesn't like being called stupid and she doesn't like bad sex.

"I do. Say, Artie, you must have a crowd of eager women, who's your valentine?"

His face flushes red and he spins his wheels to leave the room, muttering about how Santana was probably looking for a trophy wife since she was apparently so rich.

"Man," Puck shook his head, "I felt bad for him after Brittany dumped him but now I can't understand why she ever dated him."

"Gee, thanks," Brittany pouted.

"So when do we meet this princess charming of yours?" Rachel, too, wishes Finn had understood her hints at a pair of diamond earrings. She settles for living vicariously through Brittany.

"Maybe next month, if you guys can make it to my New Year's party."

"Totally!" Rachel clapped her hands together, "I'll be bringing my state of the art Karaoke system!"

"Lame," Puck said, not really meaning it.

"I have a few single girl friends that love guys who can sing," Rachel told him pointedly.

"Then I'm so there and it's not lame at all," Puck affirmed, instantly smiling.

"Rachel, that's not how you set up two people," their leader, Quinn, massaged her temple and shook her head.

"What are they talking about?" Brittany queried Sam as Rachel and Quinn squabbled.

Sam grinned, his large lips stretching in amusement. "Rachel can't believe you went on a blind date and got an actual relationship out of it."

Brittany blushed, finger tips touching the diamond on her neck. Santana was… simply amazing. They clicked, and despite Rachel and Mercedes cooing at her jewellery, it was the small things that made her happy.

How Santana laughed, the smell of her armpits, the shine of her hair, her gentle grace and passion in private compared to her raised chin in public… her ass, her boobs… her sweet smile when Brittany felt stupid… how their fingers intertwined so perfectly…

Brittany wouldn't accept a diamond from just anyone, but Santana was special.

She made Brittany happy.

/

Bass

/

Santana had developed the shivers when she was five.

Her mother and father were teaching her English at the coffee table in the living room of their tiny house. They lived in a small flat near the hospital downtown, because her father was a resident medical student with low income and her mother worked in the salon nearby. They couldn't afford to send her to nursery and kindergarten nearby would start next week. They wanted her to know English so that she could talk to the other kids instead of using her fluent Spanish.

"Hello, me's names Santana!"

Her mother laughed and kissed her cheek, correcting her, "my name is Santana."

"My… name…" she watched her mother patiently mouth the words back to her, "is Santana!"

Her parents clapped happily and Santana was on cloud nine, shrieking with laughter as her mother peppered her face with kisses.

Then chaos erupted outside their shitty house, some woman screaming 'no!' and begging followed by gunshots and evil laughter.

Her father held up his hand to quiet them and Santana knew something was wrong when her mother looked terrified.

She remembers laughter, and then she remembers screams.

Her father told them to get in the closet and hide as a brick shattered the front window, her mother screaming as her father was ambushed by men in black swinging bats and clubs and demanding he pay them what he had or else, her father begging them to stop when they realised how hot his wife was… when they ripped off her clothes and made him watch, punished him for being a doctor while they were nothing.

That was when the shivers started. The pain in her body was searing, and then the men were screaming because they were literally ripped apart.

She doesn't remember much else but the wet, sticky, burn of blood that she was covered in. There was a flashlight, and this time the men that came into her house were wearing blue.

"Oh my god," one of them vomited.

She had started crying because these men were speaking the foreign English words to her that she needed her mother to help her with and her parents were just lying there. They wouldn't wake up no matter how much she shook their arms.

"M-Mami!"

Her father always told her it would be fun to wake up Mami together on the weekends when he was home and her mother was trying to sleep in. They would jump on her and then they would all wrestle in the sheets until her mother surrendered and they all had brunch.

"Papi! Papi!"

Someone was lifting her up and taking her away and she screamed, telling them she couldn't leave her parents, but no one understood her Spanish pleas.

"Poor girl," Special Agent Leroy Berry tore his eyes away from a girl no older than his own little Rachel before he looked back at the crime scene.

"Understatement," the coroner in charge looked lost, like he had no idea where to start.

Blood everywhere... Detached limbs…

"What the fuck happened here," he wondered.

"This is the weirdest case I've ever seen," his colleague, Agent Ken Tanaka looked like her wanted to vomit. "How are the Killowak Gang all dismembered and the victims just… not? The woman outside was raped and beaten to death, but her limbs aren't ripped off either..."

The case was a dead-end. Five affiliates of the worst criminal organization, the Killowak, notorious for raping and murdering and robbing… had their arms, legs, and heads ripped from their bodies. Coroner's report claiming no way a weapon would have done it, that it was like someone with enough strength had ripped the flesh apart. Blood spatter analysts concluding something similar but shaking their heads like it was the detectives' job to find out why.

They had been able to tie blunt trauma to the head and a gunshot wound to the murdered victims Dr. Lopez and his wife Mrs. Lopez, and even found the same gun clutched in a severed hand, but Leroy Berry was losing sleep at night because of this mystery.

In guilt and empathy, he visited the social services and met with the young Santana Lopez. Such a pretty girl she was, when not drenched in blood and screaming for her parents.

"The blood found on the kid matches the Gang-Fucks," Ken had puzzled over their case folder that morning. "Was that kid fucking dancing in their blood or what?"

As crass and insensitive as his comment was, it really made no sense why the little girl appeared to have been the one who ripped apart human bodies. She must have touched the bodies, or been in the line of fire when they were ripped apart to soak up the blood. Kids did weird things, Leroy knew as much since his little Rachel told him their neighbour Miss Margie was having an affair with two men at the same time. When he asked her how she knew, she said she could read minds.

"She's been quiet," Child Services affiliate Emma Pillsbury filled him in on Santana's condition. They both observed the girl sipping on a juice box with a few other kids as a puppet show was put on for them.

"What she witnessed was… horrible. These kinds of traumas can truly affect a child's psyche," Emma continued sadly. "Look at these drawings she's been doing, over and over again. I can only imagine what she feels."

Leroy looked at the drawing and frowned in confusion.

Black fur, like a giant hideous bear-wolf or something, with red crayon oozing from large fangs and claws that he could only assume was blood.

/

Instrumental

/

"I'm Brittany."

Santana raises her eyes from her purple princess Barbie and blinks at the blonde girl sitting across from her. No one talks to her in the daycare centre. Some of the boys push her and tug on her hair but then the adults supervising scolded them and now they all leave her alone.

"You're so pretty."

Santana doesn't understand what this odd girl is saying to her, but her blue eyes are so kind and her hair is a magnificent yellow. She looks like Santana's purple princess Barbie.

"Eres una princesa?" She decides to ask.

"Your words are funny," says the princess, with a giggle.

Santana smiles because even though she doesn't understand what was said, the other girl is so kind and her laughter is… just…

Aware that none of the kids really understand her, Santana points at her doll and then points at the girl, back and forth until Brittany speaks again.

"Barbie? But… my name is Brittany. That's what everyone else calls me. Am I Barbie? I want to be a unicorn because they are sooo pretty!"

"Britt-?" Santana scrunches her face, "Britt?"

"You can call me Britt! Um… Why is your skin not white?" Brittany asks, now colouring with crayon on some yellow construction paper.

"Britt princesa?" Santana looks back at Barbie and smiles, "Britt-Britt!"

"Do you like dots? I like dots. The candy ones that come in the yellow boxes and you eat them all at once, but then they get hard to-to swallow so I started eating them one at a time but it was hard."

/

Chorus

/

"You're so beautiful tonight," Santana murmurs into Brittany's ear, sneaking in a quick kiss.

Brittany nudges their noses together and then sneaks in a real kiss. Santana sighs as they part, wanting this night to never end.

She had gotten married a few hours ago and now there was dancing and live music and a lot of people she didn't care about, most of them invited by Brittany, laughing and drinking.

"Not as beautiful as you," Brittany bites her bottom lip and then presses a quick kiss to Santana's cheek. "Santana… I-"

"Shhh," Santana closes her eyes. "The honeymoon is a surprise, remember?"

Brittany nods and they sway a bit to the beat. Santana's hand is warm on her waist, but their palms are getting sweaty so she lets go and wraps both arms around Santana's shoulders.

"Just the right height for an arm rest," she repeats a joke from their first heavy make out session.

Santana laughs and then says, for the hundredth time since their 'I do's' and with no less vigour, "I love you Britt-Britt."

/

Alto

/

"I'm not on a break," Brittany jams her finger on the elevator door and glares at Quinn. "For the thousandth time, I'm retired. I want a normal life Quinn, and Santana and I are building our life together."

"Crime fighting isn't a job," Quinn reminds her, "it's a duty. Sylvester is building an army of her fucking Cheerios and we need all the muscle we can get, Brittany. Santana doesn't have to know-"

"Santana married me, the Brittany who dances and to her knowledge, doesn't have magical powers. My Unicorn days are behind me can't you just respect that?"

"You're being selfish!"

"For once in my life, yes I am."

There's a moment of silence and then Quinn holds no punches back. "Your mother mentioned you guys are thinking about starting a family at Rachel's dinner party."

Brittany's breath hitches and Quinn knows she's hit the right nerve. The elevator stops at the top floor of the expensive downtown building and she follows Brittany to flat 14-2.

"She seems to think you're carrying the baby."

Brittany urgently jams the key into the lock, "I think we're adopting – not that it's your business."

"What's going to happen if you give birth and your little one starts levitating its toys? I think Santana will figure it out by then."

Brittany swallows, the situation is tricky. Santana wants them to have their own baby, but she wants Brittany to carry it because the Latina has some kind of medical condition that won't allow her to get pregnant. Brittany thought it odd since Santana seems perfectly healthy and she's pretty sure Santana never even goes to the doctor, but whatever.

"I heard I can use her egg and then it's like I'm carrying her baby anyways."

"What?!"

They realise they're in the apartment and Santana looks absolutely shocked at the last sentence.

"Um…" Brittany feels her face flush and it's not because Santana looks super hot in her work out shorts and sports bra, it's because she's ashamed of her secret.

"You know what," Quinn intervenes, "I can always stop by for coffee another day. See you guys later! Always nice to see you, Santana."

"S-sorry," Brittany looks down at her feet and deposits her keys on the hook by the door that has a bunch of other keys. "Please don't be mad?"

Her wife sighs, "I-I'm not mad."

"Yes you are," Brittany points out because she knows Santana and she knows when Santana gets mad.

Santana has her hands on her hips and her shoulders relax as she sighs again, "Britt… that stuff is kind of private, don't you think?"

"Quinn brought it up, my mom told her."

"Yeah but, what's this about using my… my…"

"Your egg?" Brittany giggles at Santana's embarrassment. "Don't you think that's perfect? I'd give birth and then like, it would still be yours too. That way it has both of us."

That way it won't levitate toys.

"No!

Santana's so quick and desperate to shut her down that Brittany realises something truly is wrong.

"Look babe, I would love to have kids, but I can't get pregnant. You should be the one to carry our baby, you'd look super hot pregnant."

"You can't? Why not… you're a girl. Girls get pregnant."

"In my case… something's wrong with me so I just… can't. Britt, please don't make me talk about it okay? It's a medical condition and that's that."

"Santana?"

"I just mean that… since I can't get pregnant, um, my eggs won't…"

"Oh!" Brittany blushes, "now I feel stupid."

"You're not stupid, Britts."

They're hugging and Brittany sighs. "Santana, pregnancy scares me. I want to do it but…I just…"

"No pressure," Santana's hands are soothing on her back. "Look, baby, with all of the charity work I do and all of the less fortunate children I see…"

Brittany smiles into Santana's neck, "so now you're thinking about adoption?"

"Yep. I would still love a little Brittany… but more than anything I just want to raise a spoilt brat and give them everything good this world has to offer because I was robbed of that until I… until I met you."

Brittany is so in love it hurts. Especially because she isn't completely honest.

"Is this because you were an orphan?" Brittany asks hesitantly.

Santana leans back and looks her in the eye, "I don't think so… I mean, one of my few memories of my parents was them telling me about how I grew in Mami's stomach, it was a bedtime story. They said I was special because I was born out of love… it's what kept me going until I met you and realised I'm worthy of being loved."

Brittany wants more than anything to confess to Santana. To tell her that she grew up being able to create illusions and that her family has a long ancestral line of magical power and she is some kind of blonde prodigy that can actually levitate objects and even fly.

Instead she presses a kiss against Santana's lips and selfishly enjoys her normal life with her normal wife and their normal unresolved kid agreement.

/

Chorus

/

They decide to adopt, and think maybe the pregnancy could happen in a year or two.

Santana isn't picky when it comes to children but she is especially picky about people. She had to hold tightly on Brittany's hand so that the slightest shiver calmed her inner beast down.

It has been years since she's given in to her shivers and thinking of Brittany is the only thing keeping her from letting go of that control.

"Now I get why you didn't want to adopt," Brittany concedes, glaring at the stuffy nun lady that had just told them she wasn't comfortable with two women raising a child together.

"I'm sorry but it's a sin," the lady continued like they were discussing the weather, "and while I understand you seem to have enough money to raise children I cannot consciously condemn a child to be forced to live with sin, it's better they don't have parents at all-"

"You listen to me you fifty year old virgin," Santana stands up and slams her fist down on the wooden desk. "You're going to let us adopt whoever the fuck we want to adopt-"

The nun gasps and Brittany lets out a little squeak, but Santana goes on.

"—so you can shove your righteous conscious up your ass because we'll be in touch. I'll sue the shit out of this place and then donate a good million to keep it running and you can publicly apologise when the court charges you with a hate crime!"

"We could have just gone somewhere," Brittany tells her later, in between catching snowflakes on her tongue.

She's so innocent and forgiving that Santana falls in love with her all over again.

"I know, but the world is changing Britt, and I'm the position to use money and power over people to change it faster so… why the fuck not?"

"It's hot when you get all angry-bitch," Brittany bends her neck down to nuzzle into Santana's grey coat sleeve. "I can't believe we're going to have kids."

"I know." Santana stops walking and takes a short breath of cold air.

Brittany looks at her quizzically, "Santana, are you crying? You haven't been drinking today have you?"

The woolly mittens on her skin make her feel like she's been touched by angel, which is something she's been feeling ever since her first kiss with Brittany and the elevator taking them down from the theatre balcony to the first floor suddenly stopped. Santana hated enclosed spaces and Brittany kissed her to distract her. She's been distracted ever since.

"Britt…"

"What is it? Santana, you're being weird…"

"Britt I'm scared."

Brittany looks relieved, "so am I. We can be scared together."

"No, I mean, but… you're still dancing and I've pretty much quit work because I have so much money and I just want to…"

"You're scared that you'll get fat? Because I mean, you eat healthy and you use the elliptical every day. I think your body is perfect."

"What? No, no. Though I do have an irrational fear of extra calories… I just, God, I'm afraid that I won't be good enough."

"Oh."

Santana is crying and she hates that Brittany is seeing her like this and she can't pretend it's the alcohol and not her sad, sad, totally literal, internal demon and totally fucked up life. Usually it is the alcohol anyway.

"Honey," Brittany sighs and presses a firm kiss to Santana's lips, catching a small sob. "You want to know a secret?"

Santana rests her chin on a shoulder, "what?"

"You're the best person I know. That means you'll be the best mother too, silly. The most awesomest mother, I'm sure of it!"

/

"So darling," Susan Pierce hands her daughter, now a woman married and with a daughter of her own, "that little girl is precious."

"Mom, I know what you're going to say-"

Her mother smiles so tightly, "you are the last chance to keep magic in the family."

"I like my life without magic."

"Don't say that," her mother looks terribly hurt, "magic has helped save the world, save lives. It's our heritage."

"I love Santana and I love Keera."

"I'm sure Santana would still love you and Keera would worship you, darling, you can't hide something so vital of yourself. That's dishonest."

/

Soprano

/

They all had grudges with Snix. Finn had both of his arms broken by it, Lauren was put in a coma, and Snix had slapped Puck so hard he left the earth's atmosphere.

Not to mention how Snix had once choked Rachel and her voice was lost for a week, Mike was caught in a goop of infamous Snix-juice that had to be sawed off of his legs when it hardened so he could use them again, Brittany saw Snix kick a puppy, Quinn had her arms Snix-juiced in an embarrassing encounter and Mercedes was found dangling by her feet from a bridge over shark-infested waters.

"It calls me trouty mouth," Sam adds to Quinn's rant.

"It made fun of my costume," Kurt sniffs indignantly; "this is not last season! And what would it know? All it wears is black fur!"

"Shark-infested waters, Kurt, shark- infested waters!" Mercedes waves her hand, because she thinks she's got the biggest right to hate.

"Trust me, you guys are just lucky it hasn't used that Snix-juice on you," Mike mutters.

"Guys, can we get back on topic?" Arties tries to settle the team down. They ignore him.

"I was slapped out of the atmosphere guys! I could have died," Puck pouts, only relaxing when Lauren pats his shoulder.

"Guys?"

"Hello, you're all forgetting that I actually managed to cut Snix. My family sword, the Great Goth, almost cut through that ugly, hairy black shoulder." Tina boasts, especially because she has no superpowers, she only wields a supersword.

"Guys!" Arties yells and finally the room silences. "Thank you."

"What is it, Artie?" Quinn curiously asks.

He pushes buttons on a fancy remote and the large screen lights up with footage of a skyline, some tourist telling the camera that this was the gorgeous and exotic India.

"This is recovered footage from Dubai that was discovered by a dead man's wife when she went through his old videos. Eight years ago Snix was in Dubai. Watch carefully."

It's hard to miss.

"What's that person doing?" the guy questions in panic when he sees someone dressed in black stand in the middle of the street. "Hey buddy, are you crazy! What the fuck-"

The black figure suddenly expands, and what was once a human-sized black figure becomes a fifteen-foot familiar monster they all knew and despised.

"Snix has a secret identity," Quinn sits up in intrigue. "Holy shit. It's been a person this whole time?!"

"And that's where we start looking," Artie smirks, "we'll be able to profile it better than the government. We take Snix out, get some of our pride back."

"It would be nice to finally nail a criminal instead of barely stopping crazy Sylvester and her newly incorporated League of Doom."

"Fucking hate that Pink Dagger," Puck huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I want to strangle Honey Badger, she gives me the crazy-creeps," Lauren adds, shuddering at the thought.

"Yeah but," Rachel shakes her head, "Snix hasn't appeared in five years now. No criminal activity, no sightings… for all we know, it's dead."

"Brittany!" Quinn stands up.

"What about Brittany, the retired magical unicorn?" Mercedes mocks their old group member. "She's too busy being Sapphic soccer mom or feminist house wife. Whatever."

Quinn rolls her eyes and explains, "Brittany might be able to use some magical spell to find Snix. We still have furry-DNA-gunk from Tina's sword slash way back when stored in the freeze-chamber. If it's human at all, then Brittany can locate it. That's how she's always found us when we were injured."

At the reminder, everyone feels bad for always harping on Brittany, living life's luxuries out like some fairytale. She had saved every single one of them, more than once.

"New Directions," Rachel stands up in her golden glory, "Let's get Snix once and for all, restore some morale around here."

/

Alto

/

The day her world turned upside down started off as one of the happiest days of her life.

Brittany watched Santana and Keera paint a dollhouse, the six year old girl wanted more pink and Santana hated pink but she happily humoured her daughter.

"So Britts," Santana narrowed her eyes at Brittany playfully, "your baby bump is starting to show there tubbers."

"Shut up," Brittany put her coffee mug down before jabbing Santana's shoulder, hard.

"Hey, at least Lord Tubbs won't feel left out. He'll have fat company."

"Mom's not fat," Keera scolded Santana, "I knows cuz we saw fat people on TV and they were HUGE."

"That's what fat means?" Santana humours their daughter. "I thought it meant magical because your Mom is magical."

"She is?"

"Totally," Santana winks at Brittany, oblivious to how Brittany's stomach flips pancakes.

If only Santana knew how magical she really was.

The little kid in her stomach was like a countdown of the days Brittany had to come clean. She choked on her next sip of coffee.

"You okay?" Santana questions, hoping her comment would have at least brought on a blush.

Brittany smiles, "yeah, fine!"

When the house phone rings, she jumps up to answer it and distracts herself.

"Hello?"

She listens to the person ask for chilli-chicken. With a deep sigh she acknowledges the secret code and says "wrong number" before going to her bedroom and grabbing her cell phone to call Quinn.

"Hey Britt?" Santana's voice calls to her before she can search through her contacts. It's been years since Quinn was speed dial. They met for lunches twice a week, or coffee.

"Yeah?" She walks down the large hallway and smiles at the sight of Santana washing her hands with Keera, their dollhouse drying on the side.

"I'm taking Keera to school for rehearsal so, I guess I'll meet you there?"

"You're not coming back home?" Brittany asks, leaning her arms on the counter and wishing all her guilt away. It was so hard to think Santana might hate her for keeping her magic a secret, that this life they had together would change.

Then again, she never questioned Santana's monetary skills. Her wife was some kind of money genius with the profit of her investments, and Santana didn't like to talk about it much. Brittany found everything accounting-wise boring anyway so she didn't pry but deep down she was curious. Santana was always donating to charities and acquiring more property and worked part time now with her accounting firm.

"I volunteered to chaperone the rehearsal," Santana blushes bright red like she always does when she realises she's probably being overprotective. "Plus, you know, I funded for extra props so I better make sure they do it right."

Keera runs off to the door, "Let's go! We're going to be late and Sara will steal my spot in the change room! Mami!"

Brittany walks with Santana to the door, "do you remember how to paint her face for the tiger makeup?"

"Totally," Santana leans in for a chaste kiss and then backs out with a sly smile, "I'll save you a seat, kay? Then we can all go out for dinner after."

"Sounds like a date," Brittany remembers how she's going to be talking to Quinn about superhero stuff and steals another kiss out of that recurring panic.

"Stop kissing!" Keera shoves at Santana's legs.

They both chuckle and Brittany pouts at Keera, "you aren't going to say goodbye?"

Keera looks so upset, "of course I am!"

Santana grabs her car keys and a light jacket as Brittany fixes the fleece on Keera's shoulders. Keera kisses her cheek and says, "bye Mom."

"Don't be nervous, okay? You'll be amazing, I know it!"

"Okay!" This brings a smile to her daughter's cheeks again and then Santana is closing the door with a laugh as Keera demands she's old enough to close the door too, you know.

She bites her lip for a minute and stares at the door until she decides to call Quinn tomorrow. Not today, not tonight. One more normal day before she told Santana, was that too much to ask?

/

Chorus X 2

/

Santana grins proudly at her handiwork, "totes the best makeup here."

Keera brags to Sara how her makeup is better, those two have some serious issues at six and it's the cutest thing ever so she doesn't try to meddle. Brittany is always telling Keera to "play nice" but Santana thinks it's good to have some healthy competition.

It's how she survived; it's how she now has this amazing life. Money, education and a boring ass job, pregnant wife, bratty adopted kid, school plays…

Brittany had a tendency to be late to things so Santana tossed her coat over a chair next to her and texted Brittany the location of their seats. It would be starting in ten minutes.

Then, there was an explosion.

/

"Keera! Keera!"

"Santana!" Brittany grabs her into a hug and Santana clutches tightly before sniffing, "Bittany, Keera—I can't-"

Brittany feels her blood freeze. "No," she whispers.

Santana seems to snap out of her frenzy, the night chill the least of her worries. Paramedics are scrambling, people are still screaming and then a megaphone taunts everyone within distance.

"People of Lima," Sue Sylvester laughs like a maniac, "I asked for a billion dollars and no one took me seriously enough. Now, I could kill normal people but that isn't getting my message across."

Gasps are everywhere and Santana's eyes zone in on Keera, one of twenty scared children in costumes for their play, and she's in the arms of a red Cheerio. Crying.

"Keera…" Santana struggles for breath. In that instant she realises just how much she loves that little girl who had been crying her eyes out because no one would play with her a year ago. "No, no, NO!"

Brittany grabs Santana's arm and grounds her, not wanting her wife to get shot, "S-Santana-"

"I have a billion!" Santana ignores her and screams at Sylvester. "I can round up a billion just let them go!"

Brittany knows Santana has nothing close to that but she sees Keera and all those scared kids and she knows Sylvester would kill them if she didn't get her money.

"Please," she adds, nodding from behind her wife.

"M-Mami!" Keera screams, reaching her hands out.

Santana and Brittany are just a pair of many parents begging for their kids life, but Sylvester heard the 'billion' in their plea.

"Oh look ladies and gentlemen," she mocks, "if it isn't the charitable millionaire Santana Lopez. This your daughter? You own a fifth of the city at most don't think I'm stupid. You have nothing close to a billion! You own property and you donate like some stupid robin hood! It's pathetic."

"Please," Brittany speaks because Santana's shivering and she's worried that this is too much. Her body is literally quaking. "Please let the kids go."

She had to do something. Brittany chants under her breath, ezeerf.

Time stops.

She collapses to her knees and then she turns to make sure it worked.

"What the…"

Her skin is touching Santana's so that her wife feels the effects with her.

"You…" Santana blinks rapidly as she soaks in the fact that time has stopped and Brittany looks spent. "You stopped time."

"We need to free the kids," Brittany urges her. "I can only hold it for a few more minutes!"

Santana doesn't help her up, she stares at her.

They stare at each other.

"Brittany... You're Unicorn, aren't you? The magic one."

"Santana," Brittany feels the power being used start to drain, "the kids! Question me later-"

"I love you," Santana says quietly.

"Now is not the time-"

"And the only reason I'm doing this is because I can't contain it anymore. That's our daughter, you understand."

She shivers, violently.

"W-what are you…" Brittany's jaw drops as the pieces fall together.

Santana shakes so hard, she looks so angry and her beautiful, beautiful face deforms slowly. It's hideous, but Brittany can't look away.

"I will," Santana's voice says.

"Slaughter." Snix growls.

/

Bass

/

"You have the most beautiful eyes."

Brittany averts her eyes shyly, "you're just saying that."

"Well I mean it," Santana mumbles, "it's true."

They slow dance as the live jazz music sizzles their sexual tension. One whole month of dating, and Brittany wants tonight to be the night.

"I like your shoulders," Brittany tells Santana, her hands copping a feel of the soft slopes before moving back to link behind Santana's neck. "Also, I like holding you like this. Perfect armrest."

Santana laughs and presses a kiss to her lips. "I almost lost function of my left arm, you know, because some Asian chick stabbed me."

"Is that why you have that scar?" Brittany speaks into her ear now. She thinks of last spring and how Tina almost chopped off Snix's arm. The thing howled in pain, it must have really hurt. "Ouch."

"It hurt like a motherfucker, not going to lie," Santana's fingers hold firmer on her waist. "I was hoping tonight you could kiss it better."

"I'll kiss all of you better."

Santana moans into her ear, "I want you so badly, Britt."

"Let's get out of here then."

/

"Stop, stop!"

"Say mercy!"

Santana bursts into another fit of laughter, "m-mercy!"

Brittany stops her tickles and sits back on her girlfriend's stomach.

"So, um, my dance group i-is performing this weekend… I was wondering if you wanted to come see the show?"

"I'd love to," Santana is still catching her breath, "just… I've got to fly out to Hong Kong tonight. I'll be back late Friday night."

"Well… you can come Saturday or Sunday, I mean, we open Friday at seven but… its okay, I know you're busy."

Later that night she was flying around Hong Kong and her binding spells failed to hold Snix. The damn beast just flexed and mocked her with laughter. "Going to have to bounce Unicorn, I've got a hot date this weekend I can't miss!"

"Ugh, with who? The Lockness Monster?" Mercedes claps and a bolt of lightning hits the spot Snix was just in.

"She's hotter than your tater-tot eating ass, wheezy!"

"You don't diss ma tots bitch!" Mercedes screams and claps harder so that lightning strike faster, "and for the last time its VIXEN! I may be curvy but I'm still hot! Which is more than I can say for your monstrous ass!"

Snix growls as a bolt strikes her hand, burning only a small part of her but a part nonetheless. Mercedes is triumphant until the criminal monster jumps into the sea and disappears.

Brittany is super ecstatic when Santana surprises her at the Friday night show, the opening act, right in the front row with a bouquet of coloured roses to give her at the end and a proud smile.

Her left hand is burnt, something about spilt coffee, and Brittany kisses it better.

/

Brittany thinks of silky black hair she loves to comb with her fingers.

Snix has thick black fur.

Brittany thinks of a perfect smile and of perfect white teeth.

Snix has sharp, ugly teeth that give people nightmares.

Brittany thinks of gentle hands that touch her, worship her. Hands sneaking underneath her wedding dress minutes before the actual ceremony, massaging her shoulders, kneading her breast… hands she holds everyday of her life.

Snix grabs the Cheerio that was holding Keera and rips his head off.

/

Chorus

/

Brittany presses Keera's face into her chest and stares. The black monster rips Cheerios apart. Parents have reunited with their children; Sylvester is making a retreat in her getaway helicopter thing.

Snix gives chase.

/

Instrumental

/

"She was willing to give up everything for her daughter and the rest of those kids," Greg, the infamous Sara's dad, says into the microphone. "Santana Lopez really is the giver people say she is, it's nice to see someone like her in this day and age."

"Those New Directions really gave Sylvester a run for her money," one guy, for his own safety has a blurred face, chuckles his opinion bravely.

Brittany is crying and she slams her fist down on the sofa. The television blows up just as footage of Snix jumping on top of Sylvester's escape vehicle is shown.

"So you can blow up televisions and stop time." Santana's voice cuts into her moment.

She's home.

Brittany whips her head around and stands up from the couch.

They stare at each other.

"You… you…" Brittany gasps, "you just-just ripped those people apart!"

"I can't control it!"

"YOU RIPPED HIS HEAD OFF!"

"SNIX! SNIX DID IT, NOT ME!"

"OH SO THERE'S A FUCKING DIFFERENCE?!"

"YES!" Santana wipes at her cheeks which are soaked with tears, "Brittany-"

Brittany flinches back from the hand that was about to touch her shoulder, "DON'T you touch me, Santana!"

"Why are you guys yelling?" Keera whimpers from the doorway.

Santana drops her hand and her lower lip quivers. She walks over to her daughter and kneels before her.

"Keera, Mami has to leave for a little bit, okay?"

"Why?" Keera sniffles, "Did I does something wrong?"

"No, no," Santana soothes her with quick Spanish words and then wraps her in a large hug. "Mami has to make sure the bad guys that scared you and all your friends tonight never scare anyone again, okay?"

Keera cries into her shoulder and Santana tries to give her all the love she can in that hug. "Shhh… it'll be alright, I promise. I love you."

Brittany tears her eyes away from the sight. "Santana I think you should leave now."

/

To be continued...