Hi, this is MerlinPsych! This is just a weird one-shot crack fic... I got the idea during my science final last year, when I was sketching Merlin comics in the margins. I was just thinking of how much density sounds like destiny... There's also a reveal and Life of Pi reference. Don't expect this to be some work of talent, I'm honestly not even sure why I'm publishing it. :) Well, enjoy! I am welcome to feedback, unless it's really mean.

"Merlin! Tell him now! It's your destiny!" The dragon cried, as fed up with the wait for the reveal as the fans.

"What?" Arthur asked from where he lay on the ground, under the dragon's claws, "Tell me what, Merlin? And what does mass divided by volume have to do with anything? There's a dragon here! I thought I killed him!"

Merlin stared down at him and face-palmed. "Arthur, he said destiny, not density. I am a sorcerer; I hardly need math!" He clapped his hand of his mouth in horror. What did I just do? He thought miserably, realizing at once that he'd revealed himself.

There was a VERY awkward silence.

Then, Arthur looked furiously at him.

"OF COURSE YOU NEED MATH, MERLIN!"

"I'm sorry I lied, but-" Merlin began, then, realizing what Arthur said, "I'm sorry, WHAT?!"

"I said, you need math!" Arthur replied slowly.

"But, but," Merlin spluttered, "I just told you I have MAGIC, and you're hung up on THAT comment?!"

"Oh, that? I've known about your magic for a long time! It's your lack of appreciation for academics that worries me!" Arthur yelled.

"It's true," the dragon commented.

"What do you care? Magic and math aren't connected! It's in no way part of my density! Er… DESTINY!" Merlin cried, exasperated.

"But… there's magic EVERYWHERE in math!" the dragon replied, seriously.

"Oh yeah? Give me one example!" Merlin shouted, annoyed.

"The quadratic formula…" the dragon replied, "Now that's pretty magical!"

"No way," Merlin replied, "Bad example. That's-"

"And what if you were to divide by zero? That releases some POWERFUL magic!" the dragon continued passionately.

Arthur nodded. "And the length of irrational numbers! What if pi ended?! You can't let that happen, Merlin! We'd all die! You must protect pi, it's your density! Er… destiny!"

"I AM NOT A TIGER AND I AM NOT PROTECTING SOME IDIOT IN A LIFEBOAT!" Merlin screamed.

The dragon and Arthur both face-palmed.

"Oh dear," the dragon sighed, "He's a language arts nerd."

Arthur nodded, sadly. "See what I have to deal with?"

The dragon sighed. "I can see how you'd get sick of him."

"I am so sick of you two! You wouldn't know a metaphor if it hit you in the head!" Merlin cried.

The other two looked puzzled.

"A what?" they chorused.

Merlin just shook his head. "That's it, I'm leaving! You really should have let me give you poetry lessons, Arthur! Good luck with your densi- DESTINY! Now! Goodbye!"

The young warlock stormed off in a huff. The others watched him go, blankly.

The dragon looked at Arthur. "What was his problem?"

Arthur shook his head. "I have no idea."