Disclaimer: I do not own SVM.

Author's Notes: So, I may have stopped working on my SVM stories, cause I was starting to feel burned out, but I haven't stopped reading SVM stories completely. I still have a few I faithfully stalk. That being said, in my time in the SVM fandom I've noticed a startling trend. Sookie-haters. Yes Sookie can be whiny, bitchy, and stupid, in the books and in TB. But what gets me is the pedestal that a lot of fans seem to have Eric on. Because of this, no matter what Sookie does that hurts Eric, whether it is completely justified or not, she gets slammed for it. And I find it annoying. So since it seems that what fans what, Eric fucking up and Sookie instantly forgiving him, I present this little ditty.

Orgasms Equal Forgiveness

"What do you mean you are loaning me out to the King of New York?" I demanded as I glared at my lover.

"He likes blondes. And you are so tasty that your blood will secure me my alliance," Eric replied, his eyes locked on my chest.

I huffed and crossed my arms over my generous bosom. "I am not a snack bowl of chips to be passed around at a goddamn Super Bowl party."

Eric pouted and dragged a single finger down my neck and lower, dipping into my cleavage. "This alliance is important and as my wife it is your duty to serve me in whatever fashion I wish. Besides," his lips quirked in that sexy smirk that never failed to make my panties melt. "I will make it worth your while."

I squirmed as my panties dampened. He was giving me that look that promised dirty filthy things. When his blue eyes had that gleam it was hard to be mad at him. Eric was way to pretty to stay angry at. What is a little blood when I would have his head between my legs?

I threw my arms around his neck and nipped at his jaw. "Okay I forgive you but don't do it again."

"The Queen of North Carolina will be here next week an she likes women."

I rolled my eyes and was going to protest when Eric did that thing with his tongue on that spot just below my ear. As his mouth traveled down my neck, I had one thought: I better get lots of orgasms for this. An Eric orgasm was a very convincing reason to forgive.

Author's Notes: I wrote this piece, and in now way do I stand by it other than it was something I wrote spur of the moment, after talking with a friend and fellow author about all the Sookie hate. I won't say who it was or what story brought on the conversation, just that it is a new story and is very well written. Her Sookie gets pissed at Eric and actually stays pissed at him. Go her! But some of the reviews are just insane and completely bash Sookie, simply because it's Eric Sookie is mad at. I made a comment about how I felt like writing something where Eric does something horrible but Sookie instantly forgives him because of his pretty face and awesome bedroom bedroom skills. She was all do it and in five minutes I had this. This is purely sarcastic and poking fun at Eric fanatics. There is a reason I prefer to write Sookie and Alcide and here it is. Also, know that if I get flames for this I really won't care.