Conjured this one up last night and didn't want to lose it. A little bit of ME2 lighthearted R&R. Not sure how many chapters yet, but they will be short and sweet.

Like it, love it, hate it… doesn't matter, just read and review it! ;)

"Shepard-Commander."

Trinity Shepard looked up from her coffee stirring to find Legion standing barely a foot away. His single geth "eye" rotated in his head, as he attempted to convey his thoughts to her. She stared at him curiously, before it donned on her exactly what the synthetic being had been wordlessly proposing. Her heart fluttered anxiously. It was clear Legion had been thinking about it, just as she had. The allure and excitement of their previous excursion was just too much to ignore. There was no turning back, they were in too deep. She gave the other crewmembers, which had been munching on their morning rations, a sideways glance. Returning her attention to her geth teammate, she met him with a nod of approval. "Give me ten minutes," Trinity told him lowly. "I need to prepare…"

Legion's eye bobbed in acknowledgment before taking his leave of the mess hall while Trinity silently slipped away towards the elevator.

Garrus stared hard at the coffee mug left behind on the mess counter. Still steaming, it had been abandoned without a second thought. His gut twisted in uneasiness as he stared back down at his food.

"Looks like they're at it again," Jack, the tattooed convict they'd picked up from Purgatory, proclaimed. She pleasantly speared some food with her fork before shooting an amused glance at the distraught turian sitting athwart from her.

His attention shot up to the human woman, avian eyes twitching with curiosity. "What do you mean? At what again?"

"You need to step outside that battery once in a while, Vakarian," Jack pointed out, motioning down the hall with her now empty utensil.

"For some reason, Shepard has taken too much of an interest in that geth," Tali muttered bitterly. "She's been spending time with it in her quarters as of late."

"In her quarters?" Garrus sputtered. "Why?" She rarely even invited him to her quarters.

Tali remained silent. It was clear she knew no more than he as to why. Jack was the one to speak up. "I think she's got a fetish for machines," she declared, lowering her voice.

Tali straightened, her purple-hued mask whirling to the woman beside her. "You know that's not true!" the quarian shot back.

"How do you know?" Jack questioned her. "I've known some women who preferred synthetic dick over the real thing. Maybe it just does it for her."

"This is outrageous!" Garrus bellowed, rising up from his seat and slamming his hands down on the table in irritation.

"What's wrong, Vakarian? Jealous?" Jack teased, her eyebrow raised curiously as she peered up at the flustered turian.

The three of them suddenly paused when they heard the door to the med bay slide open. They sat in an uncomfortable silence and stillness as Legion emerged from within and began passing by their position. The geth stopped, only to examine them suspiciously for a brief moment, before continuing on past the mess and towards the elevator. Garrus's heart near stopped when he heard the familiar sound of the elevator's squeaks and groans, as it made its trek to the top floor. His eyes shifted hesitantly to the two females seated across from him. One, he could not determine her reaction due to the opalescent mask, and the other… Well, he can't say he liked the look of 'I told you so' on her face.

"I'm going to prove you're wrong," Garrus told her determinately.

"Wait!" Jack exclaimed. "You going up there?"

"Just to listen," he replied, meeting her question with a casual shrug.

"To eavesdrop!" Tali chimed in matter-of-factly.

"Count me in," Jack stated, though it came off more as a demand.

"Shepard won't like this!" Tali objected, glancing from one friend to the other. When neither looked as if they were going to change their minds she groaned. "Fine, I'm going too! Someone needs to make sure this doesn't get out of hand…" Both Garrus and Jack exchanged knowing glances before the turian turned to lead the small reconnaissance team toward the elevator.

Once on the commander's floor, the three of them crept towards the door, the red indicator hinting that Shepard wished to not be disturbed. Tali looked on while the other two huddled close against the door, pressing their ears, or ear canals, against the cool metal. "I don't like this," the quarian stated, crossing her arms.

"Shhh," Jack demanded, shooting her a dirty look. Pressing her ear harder against the door, she strained to listen. "I don't hear anything—"

Almost as if on cue, she heard a laugh emanate from within the room and the sound of Trinity Shepard's voice could be heard. "So, before we start, I want to see it. You said you've upgraded since the last time."

"Indeed we have, Shepard-Commander," replied the reverberating voice of Legion.

After a few seconds of silence, the commander's voice rose up, this time with more excitement. "Impressive! Can I hold it?" Another pause caused the three eavesdroppers to shift uncomfortably against the door. "It's huge and has a nice weight to it! These upgrades are phenomenal. How much did it cost?"

"25,699 galactic credits," the geth responded with what sounded like a bit of pride in his synthetic voice.

"Nice! I could see getting a lot of use out of something like this. Maybe I'll have to get one of my own."

Garrus quickly pulled his hand away from the door when his claws had begun to dig in, causing gouges in the sleek metal.

"Shepard-Commander. Shall we begin? This platform is interested in testing the performance of its new equipment."

Jack cupped her hand over her mouth to repress a laugh while Tali, who couldn't seem to take it anymore, pressed herself against the door to hear the goings on more clearly. Garrus, on the other hand, was simply glued to the door out of troubled fear and denial.

"Okay I'm ready," Shepard said finally. "I'd like to explore this area a bit first, if I could. Just to get a feel for it. I want to know which position will provide the most gain."

"Then we are in consensus," Legion replied, seemingly pleased.

"Good, then get in," the commander ordered. "The faster we get into position, the better."

Garrus couldn't push himself away from the door any faster. The look on his face was one of pure horror. Knowing what was going on behind this door made him want to crawl back into the main battery and burry himself in calibrations. "Let's go," he demanded finally, his voice level and devoid of emotion.

"I'm not done," Jack replied, keeping herself glued against the door.

For a moment, Tali didn't know what to do. Curiosity maintained her kneeling before the door, but the look on Garrus's face scared the environment right out of her suit. Placing a hand on the other woman's shoulder she peered hard at her through the purple mask. "We're done."

"Fine," Jack muttered in reluctant surrender.