A/N: Oh, dear friends. HELP ME. I have just written another angsty story. Lately, I have been feeling so angsty. Let us blame it on my teenage-ness, shall we? Okay, so this story came to me while I was listening to John Mayer's song, Dreaming with a broken heart. It is such a beautiful song. It would be nice if you listened to it while reading this oneshot. You would feel the angst and hurt and sadness and pain more :))
I hope you guys like this story. I AM DEEPLY SORRY FOR ONCE AGAIN HURTING BOTH KANAME AND ZERO. I am a masochist, and a sadist :)) Haha.
Warnings: Angst alert, Maybe a little bit OOC? UNBETAED
ENJOY!
Dreaming With A Broken Heart
10/01/12
"When you're dreaming with a broken heart, the waking up is the hardest part."
– John Mayer, Dreaming with a broken heart
Zero shivered as another wave of cold air washed over his bare skin. He could clearly see his breath whenever he exhaled. He watched, entranced, as the white, tiny icicles slowly disappeared in thin air. Zero rubbed his arms. Maybe it was a bad idea to go outside without wearing his jacket. The hunter shivered. It was really a bad idea.
Zero looked at the moon illuminating the night sky. Tonight, it was all alone. There were no stars, not even the barest twinkle present. The moon stood proudly, alone as it did its awe-inducing task, shining and reigning in the night sky as the brightest, most beautiful celestial body. Zero sighed. He looked at the timepiece secured on his wrist. It was 20 minutes after midnight. Kaname was late.
The hunter bit his chapped lip, a knot of anxiety forming at the pit of his stomach. Kaname was never late. Something must have happened; That, Zero was sure of. Kaname would never ditch him. Kaname would never leave him hanging in thin air. Never…never…never, right?
Zero bit his lip harder, hard enough to draw some blood. Because as he pondered upon the question, he wasn't so sure about the answer anymore. Before, he would never have doubted Kaname. But lately….lately, Kaname had been distant with him, always finding excuses to not spend time with him.
It hurt him deeply but Zero never said anything. He just tried to understand his lover, he just tried to understand Kaname. The pureblood was going through some tough times. What with the upcoming war, it was no surprise to Zero that the pureblood was busy. But still, Zero frowned, it hurt him nonetheless.
He missed Kaname. He missed the old Kaname; the one who was happy, the one who was carefree, the one who was loving, the one who was sweet. Where was that Kaname? What had the war done to the man he loved so much?
Zero looked at his watch again. His face fell, the ache resting deep within his heart awakening with a vengeance. An hour had already passed. And as Zero looked at the moon shining up above the sky, he knew.
Kaname was not coming.
So with a heavy heart, Zero slowly made his way back to his dorm, wondering what, what, what.
What has happened to the man named Kaname Kuran?
Kaname stood outside the sun dorms. He looked at the window above him, the window to Zero's room. He briefly wondered if Zero was already asleep. He probably was. It was already 4:30 am, after all. Zero must have already given up. He must have already given up waiting for him, waiting for his Kaname.
An ache pierced the pureblood's heart and he had to find some support to steady himself. He never wanted to hurt Zero. God, why would he want to hurt Zero, the man who shined brighter than the moon, the man whose beauty encompasses even Michaelangelo's Madonna, the man he cared for, the man he longed for, the man he loved? Never in his long, long life would he ever want to hurt Zero.
"But it's for the best", Kaname tried to convince himself, but words sounded empty even to his own ears. He knew Zero was capable of protecting himself from the dangers lurking around. But still, just the thought of Zero actually getting hurt sent chills down Kaname's spine.
The pureblood swiftly climbed up the wall to Zero's room. Quietly, he unlatched and opened the piece of glass separating him from the man that haunted his every waking and sleeping thought. The smell of Zero hit him like a mack truck. He inhaled deeply. Zero…..
Kaname slowly entered the room, looking around with so much concentration as if this would somehow be the last time he would ever enter this room. He took in the lovely things Zero did to make his room secretly homey. A bittersweet smile played on Kaname's lips as his eyes finally settled on the only occupant of the room. For the thousandth time, Kaname marvelled at the beauty of his lover. He admired the way the moonlight seemed to illuminate his lover's pale features.
The brunette gently sat down beside the sleeping form. He lifted his fingers, wanting nothing but to trace the glowing features of the hunter. He touched Zero's soft, silver hair, his hands travelling further south, touching Zero's relaxed brows; his cute, little nose, his rosy cheeks; and his mouth, oh those pink, kissable lips. Kaname leaned in, softly brushing his lips against Zero's. He closed his eyes as another ache went through him.
He ached for more. He ached for Zero's touch, he ached for Zero's responsive lips, he ached for Zero's smile, he ached for Zero's laugh. He ached for everything he was about to give up.
His Zero. His sweet, sweet Zero.
With one final touch of lips to lips, Kaname slowly stood up. Again, his eyes raked Zero's form as if it would somehow be the last time he would ever see the hunter. He took in ever dip and every curve, every flaw and every perfection. He took in Zero as he was: peaceful, beautiful, and safe.
With one final look, Kaname left Zero's room, Zero's life.
He would not look back. No, he would not regret his decision. He knew years from now he would yearn for Zero, long for Zero, but never, he would never regret leaving his hunter. If breaking his own heart, if breaking Zero's heart was what it took to keep the hunter safe, then so be it. Zero would never have to know. He would never have to know the sacrifice Kaname had to make. All Zero had to do was hate Kaname, hate the pureblood like a hunter like him was supposed to.
And all, Kaname believed, all would be well.
Zero opened his eyes, the morning light greeting him with a brand new day. He lazily stretched, moaning as he felt his joints crack. It felt good. Slowly, he lifted his body to sit. He had such a wonderful dream last night. He dreamt of Kaname. He dreamt that Kaname was with him in his room, tracing Zero's sleeping face with his oh, so soft fingers. Zero touched his face. It felt so real...the dream felt so real. The hunter looked around. Something felt odd about his room. And then it hit him. His room….it smelled just like Kaname.
Could it be? Did Kaname really visit him last night?
Zero swiftly stood up, looking around for any traces of the pureblood. That was when he saw it: a beautiful, blood red rose was on his desk. It was neatly placed beside a picture frame. Zero lifted the frame and examined the photo enclosed within it. It was a picture of him and Kaname during their first 'date'. Zero cringed. He remembered how much of a disaster that was, what with Aidou and Ruka following them all around the city, finding ways to sabotage their supposed to be perfect day.
Zero smiled as he put down the frame. It had all ended well though. Even with all the distractions, even with all the bloopers, he and Kaname still managed to have the time of their lives. They still managed to create one picture perfect memory. He shifted his attention to the lone rose. It reminded Zero of the previous night's moon: proud and beautiful and alone.
Just like Kaname.
Zero picked it up and placed it close to his nose. He inhaled, the magnificent and beautiful fragrance drowning him, and sending shivers down his spine. A neatly folded note caught Zero's attention. He slowly picked it up, opened it and read the single word beautifully written in Kaname's perfect handwriting. A lone tear fell down Zero's lilac orb; because never, never had a single word hurt so much.
Goodbye.
A/N: So, what did you guys think? YAY or NAY? :)))
- violetkisses