Shot. Dead. Left there by those fucking bodyguards to rot. I'm so sorry, Matt…I didn't mean to get you killed, I really didn't. If I had known they would shoot…I would have done something…but no, I told you not to worry, and you listened, just like always. It's all my fucking fault.

When this is over…when it's done, I'm not sure what I'll do. I just wanted to have you with me, we could leave all this Kira shit behind us, and we could live and just have a good time until we drew our last breaths. Now…now it will never happen. You're dead…and soon, I will be too.

You were my world, my everything, and now that you're gone, I just don't fucking know anymore. You meant more to me than all the chocolate in the world, I would have given up chocolate for you if you wanted. You were always there for me, even when I was a fucking jackass to you, when I was downright bitchy and cruel.

Ever since Wammy's we were M&M…Mello and Matt…Miheal and Mail….but knowing that you're gone, and it's my fault, I feel so alone…I want to shoot myself…I can't live without you, even the thought I can't fucking stand it…

People say that I owned you…that you were my loyal pet and toy…how wrong they were. Matt, you own me…I am forever bound to you by damned fucking chains, but I don't mind…as long as I had something, as long as I had you, I could live. But now….now I am no better than dead.

Matt, I hope you know, that I'll be with you soon…I will…as soon as I pull the damned fucking trigger…