Nymphadora(she will end you if you call her that to her face) Tonks was introduced into the Harry Potter universe in OotP. She was portrayed as being a bubbly, friendly, and clumsy Auror, who also happened to be a metamorphmagus and the youngest member of the Order at that particular time. During OoTP, it is revealed that while she may be sitting in the grown up's section when the Order meetings are happening and developing both personal(Molly, Remus, Sirius) and professional(the rest of the Order) relationships, she's still is still in touch with her inner adolescent and strikes up a friendship with both Ginny and Hermione, who look up to her as their cool older "sister". It is also revealed that Tonks is Mad Eye Moody's protégé, and has a very openly affectionate relationship with her mentor and even going as far as being the only one able to openly tease him. To me, this was one of those clues that led me to conclude that Tonks had to be a really brilliant and clever auror trainee, if she managed to get tutored by Moody(seriously, he seemed like the type to be very selective about who he trained). Overall, in OotP, she's still a young woman who has been untouched by the emotional impact of war and terrorism, unlike many of the older Order members, like Sirius and Remus. It isn't until her duel with Bellatrix and the death of Sirius that the reality of war really hits close to home for her. OotP ends with her fully recovered (or at least seemingly physically recovered) from the battle in the Department of Mysteries, with her hair in it's signature pink color. I have to say that I immediately liked Tonks from the get-go. I loved how optimistic she was, and I loved how even though she was seemingly young, mischievous, and still looking like a rebellious teenager, she still was able to be fully professional and serious about stopping Voldemort and his Death Eater terrorists.

This is where I'll go on record to say that I am one of those few people who picked up on the Remadora ship before it became what was hot in the streets and gained canon status in HBP. One reason being that the dialogue that happens between Remus and Tonks during Remus' exchange with Harry, introducing all the Order members that were there to rescue him, seemed very flirtatious imo.

"And this is Nymphadora" "DON'T call me Nymphadora, Remus," said the young witch with a shudder, "it's Tonks." "Nymphadora Tonks, who prefers to be known by her surname only," finished Lupin. "So would you if your fool of a mother had called you Nymphadora," muttered Tonks.

This to me made it seem like they had a close enough relationship that Remus was totally in the clear to tease Tonks about her name, without any horrible things happening to him because of it. Another reason why my shipping radar went off with them was that in most of the scenes containing Tonks and Order members, she's always described as being in very close proximity to Remus. In addition, by the end of OotP, it seems like they've grown to relationship that's intimate enough that they're able to finish each other's sentences with ease.

"Anyway, that's not the point," interjected Tonks, whose pink hair seemed to offend Aunt Petunia more than the rest put together, for she closed her eyes rather than look at her. "The point is, if we find out you've been horrible to Harry-" "And make no mistake, we'll hear about it," added Lupin pleasantly.

All of this being said, from here on out it is very important to carefully examine Tonks and the circumstances behind her depression and the leading up to the Remadora canonization because this is where a lot of very narrow and problematic interpretations of both Tonks as a character and the Remadora pairing have arisen in the fandom. The real change that we as the reader detect in Tonks as a character starts in HBP when Harry sees Tonks' more bleak appearance and ill physical appearance during his arrival to the Burrow with Dumbledore. This physical manifestation of her not-so-well feelings is a constant theme throughout HBP up until Dumbledore's funeral.

First and foremost, I'd like to point out something which seems to be either overlooked or completely ignored in various meta written about Tonks: her job as an Auror. Her being part of the wizarding law enforcement does have a huge influence on her self concept and her emotional state. During OoTP, it's fair to assume that she's barely just been given the title of "Auror" and so she has very little experience or exposure to some of the more gruesome aspects of her work. While yes, it is highly likely she had to learn from various case studies during her training, it is one thing to know about the brutality and viciousness of Death Eaters and their methods of terror in an abstract sense, and it's another, much more emotionally impacting thing to have witnessed those things firsthand. During HBP, from the information we're given about the happenings in wizarding Britain, it is made abundantly clear that shit has gotten real in the fight against the Death Eaters. People are being disappeared or outright murdered, by either Death Eaters or Werewolves, so it would stand to reason that Tonks would have been exposed to those cases. While yes, she was stationed in Hogsmeade to guard the school, but it's possible that she could have been called in during those cases at various times. This, it does not surprise me that Tonks would not be her OoTP cheery self. Things are awful, and not exactly conductive to having happy feelings. For someone like Tonks, who has had very little experience in handling such emotionally stressing situations, being under that type of emotional stress if bound to make individuals undergoing those situations more predisposed to depression or cause them to adopt maladaptive coping strategies (drinking, drugs, etc). In addition, there's also the fact that the Dementors, by that point, under Voldemort's control, so being under constant exposure to them is also bound to have an impact on an individual's emotional state. Knowing this, it is not surprising that Tonks would not be at her happiest under the circumstances.

Secondly, a lot of people in the fandom ignore Tonk's familial relation to the Blacks (and what that entails for her) and underestimate Tonks survivor's guilt over Sirius' death. Tonks, as we know, is biologically related to the Blacks, who as we know have a history of mental illness due to all the inbreeding that happened for the sake of blood purity. The manifestation of this mental illness is clearly shown by Bellatrix and Sirius. I argue that Tonks also suffers from a predisposition to some mental illness due to her connection with her family. Her depression during HBP was highly reminiscent to Sirius' depression in OoTP. I also contend that Tonks also suffered from survivor's guilt, much in the same way that Harry did post-Department of Mysteries battle. Sirius was the only reasonable family member on the Black side, besides her mother Andromeda, who shared common ideals with her and accepted her. So when the battle of the Department of Mysteries occurred, Tonks came face to face with the side of the Black family who didn't accept her and that had opposing views. This side was represented by Bellatrix, who showed no hesitation in trying to inflict harm on Tonks during the battle. Tonks was knocked out and Sirius stepped in to take her place, which then led to him falling through the Veil. So to me, it wouldn't be surprising if Tonks blamed herself for Sirius' death. He was part of her family so it stands to reason that she would blame herself for either not stopping him from going or for not getting Bellatrix before Bellatrix got Sirius. In addition, this must have been a hit to Tonks' morale as an Auror. She was supposed to be better than the dark wizards and witches she was tasked to capture, so having a dark witch, like Bellatrix, knock her out so easily must have added to the guilt and self-blame that she was going through once she found out about Sirius' passing.

Thirdly, I agree with Harry's assessment during the Hospital Wing, that Tonks' depression was related to her feelings towards Remus. However, unlike Harry and the majority of those in the fandom, I don't think that it was the only reason as to why she was depressed. Harry drew his conclusion based on the limited information that was explicitly given to him, without taking into account any other mitigating factors (like survivor's guilt, her job, etc). So it does not make sense to me that we have to treat Harry's conclusion about Tonks as the god-given truth when there's so much implicit information that allows us as the reader to infer and come up with a more complex explanation about her emotional state. I do have to say that it is perfectly valid for her to have been worried about Remus, especially when he was putting his life at risk spying on the werewolves, especially Fenrir Greyback, who is the werewolf that bit Remus and who has a reputation of being incredibly vicious and brutal. It would be no different that any of us worrying about a loved one who was in a very highly dangerous situation. In addition, Tonks also is faced with a fight against Remus' low self concept and self-loathing that is the result of having faced discrimination and bigotry based on a condition beyond his control. This conflict between Tonks' perception of Remus versus his own perception of himself is evident in their confrontation(and consequent canonization moment) in the hospital wing after Dumbledore's death:

"You see!" said a strained voice. Tonks was glaring at Lupin. "She still wants to marry him, even though he's been bitten! She doesn't care!

"It's different," said Lupin, barely moving his lips and looking suddenly tense. "Bill will not be a full werewolf. The cases are completely -"

"But I don't care either, I don't care!" said Tonks, seizing the front of Lupin's robes and shaking them. "I've told you a million times… ."

"And I've told you a million times," said Lupin, refusing to meet her eyes, staring at the floor, "that I am too old for you, too poor … too dangerous… ."

"I've said all along you're taking a ridiculous line on this, Remus," said Mrs. Weasley over Fleur's shoulder as she patted her on the back.

"I am not being ridiculous," said Lupin steadily. "Tonks deserves somebody young and whole."

"But she wants you," said Mr. Weasley, with a small smile. "And after all, Remus, young and whole men do not necessarily remain so."

This scene was the verbal equivalent of Tonks flipping a table out of frustration. Not only that but to me, it's clear that they've had this argument again and again, with Tonks trying to help Remus out of his pit of self-loathing. I take the miraculous return of her pink hair by the time Dumbledore's funeral comes around, to signify that her and Remus have worked through at least some of his issues and he's accepted the fact that Tonks really does love him, societal opinions be damned. The moment when Remus and Tonks were shown together, with her metamorphmagus powers back, I took that to signify that a significant source of emotional stress and worry has been lifted from her shoulder. In addition, with Remus there with her, they could lean on each other for emotional support and develop coping strategies that can help them deal with the emotional stress of war resulting from both Tonks' job and Remus' ordeal with the werewolves.

I do have to emphasize the fact that, again, I do think that Tonks helped Remus deal with a portion of his self-loathing and low self-concept, however, as we saw in DH, he still needed to work through the rest of his demons. From the brief exchange between Tonks and Harry, where she tells him about her marriage to Remus, it's so abundantly clear that she's happy to be with the one she loves. However, the unexpected surprise pregnancy from Tonks brought those demons back. We aren't given much to go on, but we do know that Remus left Tonks. During his argument with Harry at Grimmauld Place, it's evident that his perception of Tonks' happiness with their marriage (and pregnancy) does not match the image that we had been before during Tonks' exchange with Harry. Unfortunately, in DH we aren't given much information about Remus and Tonks. We do know that at some point Remus does go back to Tonks and quite frankly, knowing what I know about Tonks, I don't think she would take him back as easily as she did at the end of HBP. She must have taken some time to think about it, because surely she must not have been certain that he was actually there to stay for her and her child or if he was going to up and leave when things got difficult. I also would like to point out that during the entirety of the HP series, Tonks has been shown to be a woman of action, so the fave fandom argument of her sitting idly by and purposely getting pregnant during DH holds no water imo. If anything, the unexpected pregnancy, as happy as she may have been about it, must have frustrated her to no end, since it meant that she had to sit out of most of the Order-related action. Finally, once the Battle of Hogwarts happened, and Tonks went to battle, instead of staying with Teddy, I find that action to be very consistent with her character. Tonks had studied and trained for such a battle and felt it was her duty as both an Auror and an Order member to be there on the front-lines and fight. Plus, she was looking at the bigger picture here: if she could help make a better world for her son to grow up in, then if she died, as much as she may have wanted to stay with her son, such a sacrifice may have been worth it to her.

Tonks is one of those characters that fandom really loves to hate. Most of the simplistic and narrow interpretations of her character that I've seen have failed to take contextual mitigating factors into their calculus and have created an image of a bubbly, fun young woman who later turned into a pining, weeping mess just because the man she loved didn't want to be with her and who later managed to pressure him into marriage and purposely got pregnant with his child, without his consent. This image has a significant negative impact on people's perceptions of Remadora as a pair. Because it paints Remus as a reluctant participant in the pairing while Tonks is the emotionally manipulative woman whose only desire is to have her man. This interpretation makes me wonder if I and those in fandom who have this interpretation have read the same HP books. If Tonks had not matured as a character (her attitude in OoTP versus HBP) she would have fallen victim of the manic pixie girl trope [a cute, bubbly, young woman who has recently entered the life of our brooding hero to teach him how to loosen up and enjoy life.] which is highly problematic. I argue that such narrow interpretations of Tonks are problematic because they are often used to further misogynistic arguments which disparage her character. Tonks was someone who was mature, but still capable of having fun. During her depression in HBP, she didn't sit around and mope a la Bella Swan, she got up every day and got shit done as an Auror. She also tried to help the man she loved by trying to show him that what he thought was true about himself was just a load of societal nonsense. Overall, I think Tonks was a badass woman who shouldn't be looked down upon just because she dared to show just how things in her life(the war, her love of Remus, survivors guilt, etc) were affecting her. She is one of the many, valid representations of feminist characters that the HP universe has to offer, and just because she behaved in a way that made her seem like a non-feminist character, that doesn't reflect her overall character.