Disclaimer : I don't own Bleach.

Borderline Doctoring

Respiratory alkalosis is a medical condition in which increased respiration (hyperventilation) elevates the blood pH (a condition generally called alkalosis).

Rukia Kuchiki was the top Resident Surgeon to set foot in Seireitei General Hospital, since the pristine doors had been opened. All interns, residents and even some attending surgeons admired the petite porcelain doll's determination and skill when it came to general surgery. Yet, some, those coloured green with envy, because of her gifts, complained that she had no life outside of the hospital and to be honest… she didn't have one at all.

The last somewhat serious relationship she had was in her senior year of high school. It started out as just friends, childhood friends to be exact, before the two decided to take it up a notch. Renji was always there for her, but when it became time to follow her dream to become a doctor, they both parted with a mutual agreement. Their break-up wasn't messy. It was more like a business transaction. Actually they were still friends.

Through college there had been a few flings, well, more like stress relievers for the busy Kuchiki. She had never given much thought about settling down or just being in a relationship. She had no time to fantasize about it either.

Her life was on hold when the hospital paged

But you never known what crazy life story await you in a hospital.

The last 12 hours of Rukia's life was definitely a touch-and-go scenario. Two of her patients flat-lined and one had started to choke on his intubation tube. She was dead on her feet after a night of running around the hospital, saving the lives of her patients. Yet, her shift wasn't over; she still had 6 hours to go.

As she slouched her way to the cafeteria, for her much needed caffeine dose, Rukia was greeted by two refreshed and energetic nurses she call friends.

"Rukia-chan." The annoying voice of Rangiku Matsumoto wined. "You look like crap." The older and unquestionably more endowed co-worker always had to point out how overworked and tired Rukia looked. That being said, Rangiku wasn't known for being a hard worker. In all her time at the hospital Rukia had never seen Rangiku break a sweet, which in some odd way seem unfair to the workaholic.

"Thanks Ran. I feel like it too."

"That's mean Rangiku, poor Rukia had been here since yesterday morning." Momo was one of the most caring nurses in the hospital. But most male patients took advantage of that. She was always the one being pestered by the perverts who lives were saved by the doctors of the hospital. Although the only thing Momo every complained about was when her fiancé, soon to be husband, Toshiro forgot about the dinner with her parents. Poor girl was so embarrassed.

"Thank you for your understanding Momo." Rukia took a gigantic gulp of her freshly brewed coffee and placed her over-tired body on the nearest open seat she could find. Rangiku bounced next to her and she gave Rukia a very serious look.

"But seriously Rukia. When was the last time you had a proper night's rest? Or even got laid for that matter?"

"Ran…"

"Can't remember, can you?"

"I don't need a stupid male to waste my time with an idiotic thing like sex." Rukia swallowed the last few droplets of her drink and got up, making her way to do her rounds.

"Idiotic. In what world are you living in?" Just to let you know, Rangiku was mainly known for her broad variety of male companions. Her sex life was all that truly mattered in her eyes.

"I don't need a man."

"Oh, do tell why?"

"Because either they break your heart or they get too serious, too fast and expect you to pop out hundreds of babies. I have no time to cry or be pregnant right now. So, no guys."

"Rukia, you seriously need to get laid." With that the lazy nurse left Rukia to her rounds.

When Chief of Surgery, Retsu Unohana, announced that the hospital was about to get a new Head of Cardiology, the rumour mill in the hospital caught flame faster than a speeding bullet.

Nurses predicted the godly looks of new doctor.

Attending and resident surgeons debated about his achievements.

But to Rukia, the name Ichigo Kurosaki didn't ring any bells.

About a week after Retsu's announcement, the staff of Seireitei General waited in agony for the new doctor to arrive. Of course they didn't make it too obvious.

"Rangiku, why do you have a poster that says 'Welcome Dr Kurosaki'?" Rukia had just strolled in when the bubbly nurse dragged her off to show Rukia her masterpiece, aka her poster.

"Today is his first day, so I want to make sure he sees me right off the bat."

"You mean, you want make sure he sees your very large…" Rukia thought about her next words very carefully. "…chest right off the bat?"

"Rukia-chan, when you've got it, flaunt it!" The blonde giggled, sensing a really irritating mood starting to overtake her short friend.

"I have to go, patient is waiting for me." She lied, gracefully.

"You aren't staying to meet Dr Kurosaki?"

Rukia just continued walking.

After escaping Rangiku's welcome committee, the raven haired doctor made her way down the corridor with a record time, but before she could reach her destination, the locker room, she was called upon.

"Dr Kuchiki?"

"Chief Unohana?"

"Could you please show Dr Kurosaki to the Attending Locker room please?"

"Of course. Right this wa-" Rukia had to swallow and think of words before she made a complete and utter fool of herself and drool in front of Ichigo Kurosaki. He was even more handsome than the nurses described. Come to think of it, now she knew why the nurses were waiting to ambush the poor doctor. Although his hair was blond with a reddish tint(1), his tanned skin made it work for him. Underneath his black dress shirt and lime green tie, Rukia could see that the doctor was well-build and really, very fit. A quick thought passed through the pervert part of Rukia's mind… I wonder how his skin tastes like.

"Dr Kuchiki, are you okay?" His voice was velvet and smooth sending little shivers up and down Rukia's spine.

"I am… I … am perfectly fine." Rukia mentally slapped herself for sounding totally retarded in front of the newest addition to the hospitals staff.

"You sure?"

As quick as she could she regained her posture and turned away from the godlike doctor. "Yes, would you please follow me Dr Kurosaki?"

"Please, it is just Ichigo." He was hot on her heels as they duo made their way through the hospital. "Especially for someone as beautiful as you."

Rukia stopped.

Making the orange haired doctor bump into her. Sending even more shivers down the petite doctor's body. Without a word, she continued walking to their journey's end. While walking she quickly sneaked a peek at the male and caught him staring at her with a smirk playfully on his lips. Again she swiftly, but very awkwardly, avoided his gaze.

"Here we are. Attending surgeon's locker room. I think you can take any locker that it available." Rukia quickly rambled.

"Are you… available Dr Kuchiki?" He stepped closer to the now blushing Resident and cupped her face with the palm of his large hand.

"I… I.. uhm I have a – patient to check on." She had unintelligently mumbled before turning away from the person who suddenly invoke a shortness of breath in her.

(1) Orange seemed a little anime-ish for this AU, so I wanted it to sound more, realistic. If you can imagine "blonde with a reddish tint".