The Recording

I, Ahsoka Tano, looked down at the recording that she had just received from Saw Gerrera. I wrinkled my eye markings together. It had been about three months since Onderon and I was still recovering from the nasty tank shot that I had received to my shoulder when I was trying to save… Steela.

I sighed and lay back in my bed. The woman had been a good leader and a good mentor, yet I had still felt some sort of jealousy towards her. Of course, at the time of the Onderon battles, I had tried to push away those feelings and it worked until I finally arrived back at Coruscant.

Then, I had realized that the jealousy was of her attachment to Lux. But that jealousy had grown to anger, yet not at the rebel leader, since I wasn't jealous of her being dead. It was anger at everyone outside of the Jedi Order. Why? Because they had the freedom to form attachments to others.

Though I suppose that I could form an attachment. Yet I have a duty to the Jedi and I can't really do that without carrying some sense of guiltiness with me.

My master has no problem with attachments, though. I'd seen the way that him and the Senator looked at each other. And Master Kenobi had at one point felt something toward Duchess Satine. Though, a lot of my friends in the Order were in relationships. Barriss might seem like the perfect padawan, but it was no secret that she had the hots for Commander Cody of the 212th.

Master Unduli and Master Secura also felt it okay to date their Commanding Clone Officers so they felt the need to form attachments, as well.

But not me. No, after Steela had kissed Lux, I realized that purpose was more important than feelings so I severed the attachment. And it was for the best. I hadn't thought about Lux for awhile now, but this recording somehow felt attached to him.

Pressing the play button on it, the following words came out.

Holo Recording: Lux Bonteri
Designation: Senator of Onderon
Date: Seventh Month, Twelfth Day, 2200 Hours
Recording Starts Now

Well, it's been two weeks since the death of Steela and Ahsoka's departure. It's been hectic trying to rebuild Onderon and all, but there's this feeling that I've been experiencing lately. It's hard to explain really, something of emptiness and sorrow. It's not caused by Steela, I know that. It's been hard actually coming to terms with her death, but I'd been experiencing this feeling long before I joined the fight for Onderon. I think that it was caused by Ahsoka. Yes, Ahsoka.

Ahsoka had been a good friend before Onderon, but I hadn't really spoken to her afterwards. But I had told her to call me in my defense! Or, does the guy call the girl?

I guess that I'm not an expert on being a teenager, since I never got the chance to be one with Mom's death and running from Death Watch for awhile…

You know, Carlac might've been filled with terrible memories, but there was one good thing. The kiss with Ahsoka. It might've been for cover and a little rough, but I had gotten something from her, something good and sweet.

But Steela's kiss… I was excited at first, but now I realize that I hadn't gotten anything from it. Steela, in the end, was little more than an alternative path for me. I know that it may sound shallow, but let me explain.

When I met Ahsoka on Raxus, I become immediately fixated on her. She was like an angel with glowing orange skin and bright blue eyes. But it was her grace and intellect that hooked me like a fish. She was wise beyond her years and that a trait that was hard to find in people. So when she left Raxus, the feeling of emptiness had overcome me, especially when my mother was killed by Dooku.

And trying to join Death Watch made me seem like a fool in front of her, especially when I pulled a blaster on her.

Though I'm positive that I made the right choice when I left in the escape pod. I didn't need to distract her from the Jedi Order and joining the Republic would mean that I had the chance of seeing her and that wouldn't do her or I any good.

Moving on… when I contacted the Jedi Council for help, I finally got to see her again. She had grown maybe an inch and had really started filling out her outfit… not that I was looking… a lot, anyway.

I was so happy to see her when she arrived at Onderon. I also made a point of telling Steela about how she had saved me from Death Watch. But Steela didn't seem to share the same gratitude as I did.

Probably just girl stuff, I guess…

Anyway, when I was helping Steela with her throwing arm, Ahsoka's eyes were on me the entire time. Of course, this had confused me at first since Jedi couldn't form attachments, but I had pushed those thoughts away. After all, I had long since realized that she was a prize that was unattainable, even by the strongest warrior or the richest suitor.

So, I went to Steela and for awhile, I had convinced myself that I was in love with her. But when she died… my plan failed and the attachment towards Ahsoka sprung up again when I talked with her afterwards.

Argh! I hate how she teases me so with those lovely lips and gracefulness! I hate how she moves like a whirlwind and the thing that I hate most about her is that fact that she made me fall in love with her!

…

Yes, I do love her. I, Lux Bonteri, love Ahsoka Tano with all of my heart. I love her so much that I would die for her. I would jump off a cliff only if she told me to. I…

…

It'll take at least a month and a half to rebuild Onderon. Then, I can catch a ship to Coruscant. I need to see the Togruta beauty that's captivated my heart and mind. I don't know if she'll be happy to see me or not, but I need to tell her how I feel. Yeah… I'll help the King with Onderon and then, I'll leave.

Here I come, Ahsoka.

End of Recording

I didn't know what to say. Lux had been a good friend, but to hear him say that he loved me was too good to be true.

But I realized something in that moment. Lux had recorded this two and half months ago. He said that he would be leaving in two and a half months. I looked down into the box that I had received the recording in. There was a note.

I picked it up and the words on it sent surprise jolting through my body.

He left yesterday,

Saw Gerrera

I jumped out of bed and found my shoes. I shoved them on my feet and grabbed my lightsabers. I opened the door, hoping to be able to go see Padme and ask her if Lux had dropped by, but I was stopped by the brown haired, green eyed individual that stood before me.

Lux.

He seemed to be at a loss for words and we both just stood there for a moment. But just when he started to say something, I grabbed him by the shoulders and pressed my lips to his. He seemed taken aback, but soon his lips responded to mine and we were soon in an embrace of passion.

With my arms around his neck and his hands on my hips, I felt a growing warmth throughout my body and the feelings that I had severed resurfaced as I broke away.

At first, no words were spoken as we both stared into each other's eyes. Then, I laughed. I laughed until it hurt my sides and soon, I was crying tears of joy into Lux's shirt.

He was surprised and his feelings, despite the love I felt coming from him, were dominant in the confused category.

Soon though, I had calmed down enough to say, "I did it, Lux! I broke it! I broke the rules for you and me! I broke the Code!"

I wasn't sure why that was something to laugh about, but I continued to laugh and I kissed Lux again. It lasted for a few seconds and I said afterwards, "I love you too, Lux. I've loved you from the moment you asked me if you could take my bags on Raxus!"

He laughed a little and asked, "How did you know that I loved you?"

I didn't respond, just kissed him again and that answer seemed to satisfy him.

For in that moment, we were both completely and irrevocably in love with each other and nothing mattered to us except each other.

Author's Note: The Onderon Arc just ended a few hours ago and I felt as though Dave Filoni didn't do a good job of explaining Ahsoka and Lux's feelings about each other because Lux had flirted with her a little at the beginning of the Arc and Ahsoka obviously had a crush on him. So, this is my take on their thoughts about each other. Review!