It was nearing noon on another hot sunny day in Camelot when Merlin walked down the hall to Arthur's chambers. Stopping outside the door he drew a breath and with a grimace readied himself to enter Arthur's chambers.

He sincerely hoped that Arthur would prove to be in a better mood. He could not be certain as Arthur had been in a vile mood ever since they had won the battle against Helios and Morgana. At first Merlin believed that Arthur was angry and upset as a result of the betrayal of Morgana but it quickly became apparent that this was not what Arthur was angry over.

Merlin knocked on the door and was greeted with an abrupt, 'come!'

Merlin walked in and found Arthur sat on his bed, head downcast, turning the ring he'd given Gwen in his hands.

'Arthur you can't go on like this, your people need you.'

'Go on like what?' Arthur said daring Merlin to go on.

'Go on sulking, what is the matter with you?'

'Nothing,' Arthur said sharply.

'Arthur something is bothering you, people are worried about you, and I'm worried about you. Your mood is affecting everyone and you need to tell me what the problem is.'

Both men fell silent and Arthur returned to spinning Gwen's ring between his fingers again and again. Finally Arthur spoke, 'when we arrived in Ealdor I was so happy and relieved to see Guinevere but when we ran into the forest I spoke harshly to her and she disappeared. Now will you leave me alone?'

'What did you say to her?'

Arthur sighed, 'She tried to speak to me in her usual sweet way and I snapped at her. I told her the night before didn't change anything. That I could never forgive her for betraying me, then I could see the tears in her lovely eyes and I turned away from her. The next time I looked for her she was gone.'

'Arthur, Gwen loves you, truly and deeply loves you and you've pushed her away, again.'

'She betrayed me!' Arthur said bitterly. 'Let us not forget that she kissed Lancelot.'

'I know but you also kissed Viven and Gwen had to watch you say you loved Viven.'

'But I was enchanted!'

'So? It still hurt Gwen and she forgave you. Did you ever wonder why Gwen suddenly turned to Lancelot? Maybe she too was enchanted.'

Arthur stared at him, 'when I demanded an explanation from her Guinevere said she couldn't explain.'

'Why didn't you listen to her? Why didn't you stop and think?'

'I was too angry at the time. I felt so lost without her, and when I saw her at Ealdor I was delighted and I could tell she was happy to see me as well. But I couldn't bear having her near me knowing what she had done so I thought to push her away would be for the best.'

'What? You love her but you pushed her away?' asked Merlin.

'What else could I do? I couldn't forgive her and even if I could would she be able to forgive me and return to Camelot?'

'You could go and find her and tell her how you feel. Perhaps she could forgive you, after all she's forgiven you so many times before, but you'll never know unless you make the effort. It's not as if she can come to you, lest she be executed. You cannot expect her just to appear in Camelot asking for forgiveness.'

'You don't understand. I've accepted that I'll never see her again.' Arthur said feeling a wrenching pain inside him. 'How do I ask her to forgive me? I've threatened her with execution, banished her and as good as told her that I don't love her anymore. I think she'd be right to refuse me. I don't deserve her love.'

'Maybe you're right but Gwen does deserve yours. Do you really never want to see her again? Think about what I said,' Merlin said turning away and leaving the room.

Arthur stared unseeingly out the window and wondered if he could go through life without Guinevere. He spun the ring through his fingers again, wondering what he should do.