Chapter Nineteen

Between the Lines

"You have to do it, Bella," Rosalie hissed.

"Tell me why, again?" Bella pleaded.

"Lots of reasons. Not the least of which is that I spent half a day tracking her down. Can you believe she still uses his last name?" Rosalie's eyes widened as she spat the words.

Bella felt a cold fear grip her heart. Breaths came more slowly, and stars danced before her eyes.

"Breathe, damn it!" Rosalie gripped Bella by the shoulders. "Snap out of it! Jesus, where is Alice? She'd know what to do!"

Rosalie cast a panicked look around the parking lot, praying internally that Alice would magically appear before Bella imploded. A screech of tires indicated Alice's timely arrival, and Rosalie dropped Bella's shoulders in relief.

"Why are you still outside?" Alice cried as she opened her door. "It's freezing out here!"

"Bella's having a self-esteem crisis, it seems," Rosalie announced drily.

"Well, come on! She's not going to attack you or anything. She doesn't even know who we are, remember?" Alice grabbed Bella's hand to drag her inside.

"Totally incognito," Rosalie smirked.

"This will not end well," Bella muttered as she allowed herself to be forced through the door.

The classroom was a very toasty 95 degrees. Bella was immediately struck by the lack of clothing in the room. Every woman present was tall, toned, and tan.

"Oh, God. This will not end well." Bella stared down at her large T-shirt and baggy shorts.

She turned to complain to Rosalie and Alice that she'd not known that she was attending a photo shoot, but swallowed her words when she saw Alice in a tiny lime green sports bra and matching shorts. Rosalie had just removed her shirt to reveal a red set. She looked down again at her Beatles shirt and, for the first time ever, lamented its existence.

She fought internally; one moment she had decided to remove her shirt and work in her own white sports bra, and the next minute clung for dear life to the Magical Mystery Tour. Alice, meanwhile, had taken the liberty of rolling out her mat for her. The window of opportunity for running became smaller and smaller. She sighed and grasped the hem of her shirt, pulling it halfway up her stomach, just as the door opened.

"Shit," she whispered, dropping the edge of her shirt as if it might burn her. The cotton clung to her skin, which was already sporting a sheen of sweat. Bella no longer thought of her clothes in any way. In fact, she was sure she had lost the ability to think at all.

Surely that wasn't Kate. Bella felt the contents of her stomach begin to revolt. Picket signs were thrown down, chanting stopped; it was time for a full out uprising. In spite of the sweltering heat in the room, her fingers turned to ice.

"Honey? You don't look so hot," Alice said.

Bella tipped her head to the doorway where the most beautiful woman she had ever seen, aside from Rosalie herself, stood. She was probably six feet tall, or might as well have been when compared to Bella. Straight, blonde hair was scraped back from her face into a high ponytail, curling perfectly at the ends. She wore her sports bra and shorts as if they had been painted on her, and her body was absolutely perfect. Bella was so stunned that she couldn't move. Her heart squeezed again, and her breaths came in short, painful gasps.

"I can't do this!" she said, her voice coming out in a broken sob.

"You can!" Rosalie whispered, throwing her arm around Bella's shoulders. "You're worth a hundred of her, Bella!"

Bella, however, had different ideas. Was that woman the reason Edward left her side every night to return to his own room? Was that absolutely stunning woman the reason Edward had no more than kissed her in the past six weeks? He'd seen her whole body. Had he found her wanting? Of course he had, if his experiences included the goddess who was now spreading a mat at the front of the room.

"Why did I have to do this again?" she whispered. Tears formed at the corners of her eyes so quickly she could no longer blink them away.

"You had to face his past as well as your own," Rosalie said.

Bella closed her eyes and forced herself to think about the many precious moments she had spent with Edward. She imagined his fingers combing gently through her hair as she lay in his lap. The way his lips would ghost across her jaw before capturing her mouth with his. How he would tremble as he traced the lines of her shoulders and arms, and his breath would catch as she twined her fingers with his. Edward cared for her very much; of that she was sure.

But when she opened her eyes again, Kate was looking right at her with a perfectly sculpted eyebrow raised. Bella harnessed that strength that she'd found in her memories and lowered herself to the mat.

"That's my girl," Alice whispered.

The girls struggled and grunted through the class. Well, Bella struggled while Alice and Rosalie looked as if they could teach the class themselves. The steamy heat of the room, however, loosened her muscles and allowed her to reach positions she would have previously believed impossible.

As soon as the class was over, Bella gathered her things and hastened for the door. Alice and Rosalie watched with huge eyes as Kate reached the exit at the exact same time and turned to Bella with a smile.

"Bella Swan," she said, almost warmly, but her ice blue eyes glittered dangerously.

"I-I'm sorry?" Bella stuttered. "You know my name?"

"Of course I do," Kate said, holding her hand out. "It's in my best interest to know who my husband is sleeping with, no?"

Bella felt her heart seize again, but she steeled her spine. "Edward is a wonderful person and ceased to be your business in Hawaii, I believe."

Rosalie snorted, but Alice let out a joyous shout. Bella shoved the door open and stumbled out into the frigid January weather. Alice and Rosalie followed triumphantly and ushered her to the car.

"That's my girl!" Rosalie shouted.

So that's her, Bella mused. The other woman. That was the girl Edward had given his heart to—made a commitment to. The girl who had ripped out his heart. She was stunning, too, which made it so much harder to swallow. How could Edward find her attractive after being married to perfection personified?

"Hello?" Edward called as he walked through the front door.

Bella looked down and realized that she had not showered after her yoga class. She had, instead, sat on her bed and stared at the wall and listed all the ways she could never match the perfection of Kate.

"I'm getting in the shower!" she called hurriedly. She limped quickly to her door and shut it with a snap.

"Jesus," she whispered as she realized just how sore the yoga class had rendered her. She allowed the hot water to work its magic as she continued to berate herself for believing she had anything that could hold Edward Cullen.

"Jesus," Edward whispered, at the exact moment Bella had. Picturing her in the shower was not a good idea. Treating Bella as the lady she was had been the hardest thing he'd ever done. He wanted nothing more than to gather her in his arms and carry her off to her big bed with the navy blue sheets and make love to her every moment of every day.

He refused to make the same mistakes he had with every woman before her, though. He wanted to care for her, to worship her, to make her the happiest girl on Earth. Could she possibly know how very much I love her? he wondered. How many times had he wanted to tell her? He thought he might burst from the joy of loving Bella Swan.

He tried to show her in every action, with every deed. Could she see? Were his actions enough? Every time he opened his mouth to say the words, he found they stuck in his throat.

What if she didn't feel the same? He knew she cared, that she was more than attracted to him. The way her eyes darkened just before he kissed her was more than enough proof. She trembled when he held her, licked her lips when he studied her face. It wasn't enough to know if she loved him in return.

"Hi," she said softly, pulling him from his reverie. She stood in the doorway, wearing a pristine white robe, and her hair was clipped on top of her head in damp ringlets. She was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen.

"Bella," he whispered, rising quickly from his spot on the sofa. In two long strides, he was standing in front of her. "Christ, you're beautiful."

He breathed in the clean, minty scent of her shampoo and felt his heart begin to race. Slowly, he reached up and cupped her face in his hand.

"I'm not," she whispered, her eyes downcast.

"You are," he growled, wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her close. The thought of her naked form beneath her robe was almost too much for him. "Bella..."

"Edward," she murmured. "I saw Kate today."

He froze at the mention of her. "How? Did she seek you out?"

"No. Believe it or not, we ended up in her hot yoga class over in Green Hills." Bella rolled her eyes.

"Ungh," Edward groaned. The thought of Bella bending herself into ungodly positions distracted him from his ex-wife momentarily.

"She's... she's... Damn it, Edward. She's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen," Tears formed before she could stop them.

"She's nothing," Edward snarled. Each tear on Bella's cheeks ripped a new hole in his heart. "Did she say something to hurt you?"

"No. She knew who I was, and she assumed we were sleeping together. I didn't tell her otherwise." Her eyes found the floor again as her cheeks filled with color.

"Oh, God, Bella," Edward whispered. "Please... You have to know how very much I want to."

"I don't." Bella lifted her eyes to meet his. "Do you?"

Edward crashed his lips to hers, swallowing her moans. Deftly, he released her hair from the plastic clip and plunged his fingers into the curls as they settled over her shoulders. Bella sighed and opened her lips to his probing tongue. Her hands traced up his hips and slipped beneath the hem of his T-shirt. Cautiously, she began to explore the planes of his back as he slipped his fingers under the collar of her robe.

Never again would he allow her to believe that he didn't desire her, he vowed. He pushed the material aside and palmed her breast gently. He smiled against her lips as her fingers dug into his back.

She broke the kiss to breathe and rasped, "Edward, I can't reach you. You're too tall."

He stooped and swung her into his arms gently.

"You do understand that this means everything to me?" he murmured against her neck. "Making love to you. Hearing you moan and whimper my name. You're so very precious to me, Bella."

He laid her gently on her bed, his eyes darkening when he realized that her robe had slipped completely off of her shoulders. The words. They came forth and almost tumbled out. Would she think them platitudes? She would believe he said them only to soothe her, and it would break her heart.

Instead, he showed her. He captured her lips again gently, pouring his love for her into every trace of her bow mouth. Every desire of his heart, he communicated with his fingertips as he caressed her graceful neck and smoothed over her rounded breasts. He cherished her with his touches, adored her with his tongue.

As they lay together, spent, Edward tried once more to say the words she deserved. Her eyes were closed, a smile played about her lips, and he knew that without Bella he would have nothing.

"You are my life now," he whispered.