Author's Note

This is a short(ish) story based on 3 or 4 images or scenes that have been in my head for several months. . Suddenly in the last 2 weeks, I decided I wanted to put them together into a short story (short because I don't have the time to turn the ideas into a full-blown one!) which would encapsulate the way I would love series 5 to end (tho' it probably won't!) I wanted to get it posted before the series started, but didn't manage it. Then when I watched the first episode I was in two minds as to whether to post it (for reasons that may become clear). However, as I'd already put a fair bit of effort into it I thought I may as well go ahead, and there will be one or two sentences added in the second chapter that are tweaks because of Episodes One and Two.

The title is, of course, linked to the title of the episode in the first series that featured Mordred .

NB Warning -There is major character death, but I won't say whose and all I'll say is – the story won't be over until the end of chapter 4!

PS After posting this I started reading the awesome fanfic "Dillisionment" - and noticed some similar phrases, ideas, etc. I promise - I didn't plagiarise them!

Prologue

"If the boy lives, you cannot fulfil your destiny."

"What's he got to do with my destiny? You said it's my destiny to protect Arthur."

"Then you have the answer you seek."

"You're telling me that little boy is going to kill Arthur?"

"It seems that is up to you."

- o -

"Once before I warned you of the druid boy. It is his destiny to bring about Arthur's doom... the ancient prophecies speak of an alliance of Mordred and Morgana united in evil."

- o-

The two separate encounters with Kilgharrah had haunted Merlin over the years. He would occasionally wake up in cold sweats in the dead of night, thinking about them. Would they ever be free of the prophecies of doom? Was there any way to escape the words that foretold Arthur's death?

Chapter 1

The two men stood facing each other on the battlefield – Arthur and Merlin - looking each other in the eye for the first time since that fateful day, the day that had changed everything. And that day had started with one of those duties that Merlin loathed….

- o -

It was yet another of those occasions when a man or woman accused of sorcery was brought before the court and before Arthur and put on trial for their life. Although Arthur examined the evidence more thoroughly than his father ever did, Merlin had watched his attitude to magic harden over the years, so that each trial was almost a foregone conclusion before it started. And each trial left Merlin fearing that Arthur would never be able to be free from his father's legacy of hatred towards his kind, and wondering whether the day would ever come when he could willingly and safely reveal to Arthur the truth that he had kept hidden from him for so long.

As the court waited, an old man in chains was led in, flanked by two guards. Merlin, standing as he usually did at the side of court off to Arthur's right, caught the suspected sorcerer's eye and there was something about him that seemed familiar, though Merlin couldn't put his finger on it – and it unsettled him. Arthur listened as the charges were read out – a litany of various acts of magic that the old man was supposed to have performed.

Hello Emrys.

The words in his head came completely out of the blue and shocked and chilled Merlin to his very core – and when he suddenly looked up dumbfounded, he saw it was Mordred's eyes that were staring out of the elderly face at him, a face that was also wearing a twisted smile. And now here was the druid who was prophesied to bring about Arthur's death standing only feet from the king, and Merlin had panicked.

"My lord!" The man reading out the charges suddenly stopped and looked at Merlin, as Arthur also did with the unmistakeable look of annoyance on his face that he had whenever Merlin said or did anything in public that had the potential to embarrass him. "Are we sure that the man has no weapons concealed on his body?"

Arthur looked at Merlin with a dangerous expression on his face, dropping his voice and speaking to him in an icy tone that warned him off any further interruptions. "Merlin – of course he's been searched! Just stick to doing what you should be doing, and let me do my job!"

Merlin looked over at Gaius on the other side of the room, who immediately saw from the younger man's expression that something was seriously wrong, although Gaius was clearly unaware of the identity of the man standing before Arthur.

Frightened for your master's safety, are you?

Merlin felt panic rise in him even more when he heard the words of Mordred echoing inside his mind. Merlin fixed his eyes on Mordred watching his every move, every twitch of the aged body conjured by the same aging spell that Merlin himself had used, the spell that concealed the true identity of the sorcerer within. And Merlin readied himself to move, to defend Arthur at whatever moment Mordred chose to strike. But when the strike eventually came, it took Merlin completely unawares and unprepared.

"And what have you got to say to these charges?" The list had finished being read and Arthur turned his attention back to the accused man, and waited for him to reply to his question.

"I say that your servant is the one who should really be on trial here today….."

Arthur looked first at Mordred and then at Merlin with a look of complete non-comprehension on his face.

"…. He is, after all, the sorcerer known as Emrys."

Arthur actually laughed out loud.

"You can't put off your judgment by making ridiculous claims. Your time wasting won't work on me, old man."

"Time wasting?" Mordred continued, "Then why don't you ask him to swear his innocence on his mother's life?"

"I'm not going to play your little game, if that's what you think!" Arthur still considered it a joke and seemed more amused than perturbed by it all, but Merlin just stood there shocked to the core and unnerved by the calm confidence that seemed to be oozing from the young druid. He was also painfully aware that any eyes in the room that were not on Mordred were on him, and when his eyes met those of Gaius, he saw the panic there that mirrored his own.

And the druid continued: "Has your servant deceived you so totally that you can't bring yourself to even consider the possibility that he has hidden his true identity from you since the day he met you – hidden it so that he could continue using it and manipulating you when he needed to."

"That's not true!" Merlin had not been able to stop himself shouting the words out.

"Merlin!" Arthur's rebuke to his servant had the same sharp and dangerous edge to it as before, there because Arthur was beginning to feel he was losing control of the exchange in the courtroom.

But Mordred fixed his eyes on Merlin. "Not true that you hid your sorcery from the king or not true that you were manipulating him?"

And that was the moment that Merlin faltered for just a split second – and both Arthur and Mordred saw it, and Arthur suddenly felt less sure of himself.

"You're a liar!" It was the best defence that Merlin could think of but it earned another furious glare from Arthur, which was interrupted by another of Mordred's attacks.

"Ask him, your majesty, why he knew about the Lady Morgana's magic for two years before you did and yet never told you. Ask him why he suggested that Lady Morgana go to see the druids when she first discovered that she had magic. Ask him for yourself!"

A murmer went around the courtroom, and there was something about the expression on Merlin's face that shocked Arthur and left him with an awful feeling in the pit of his stomach.

"Your majesty!" Gaius spoke up in an effort to protect Merlin, which also had the effect of drawing Arthur's attention away from Merlin momentarily. "Your majesty, you cannot listen to these idle words – he is simply trying to avoid your judgment!"

"I am sure that his words are without foundation" but even as he had said the words, there was a panic that was beginning to rise within Arthur.

And Mordred continued, "Then you are blind and stupid Arthur Pendragon! You could not see it when first your sister betrayed you and then your uncle, and you are still too blind to see that you have been similarly deceived by the one who has wormed his way into your life so that there are none of your secret's or Camelot's secrets that he does not know."

"You will hold your tongue!" Arthur's eyes flashed with anger as he leapt to his feet.

"Then let me help you with your blindness!"

It happened so fast. A knife suddenly appeared in Mordred's hand from nowhere and was sent flying through the air by a single glint of his eyes – but not towards Arthur.

Merlin's hand went up instinctively, and every person in the room drew a sudden breath as the knife stopped in mid-air only a hand-breadth away from Merlin's chest, hung there for a moment, and then clattered to the ground at his feet.

And as Arthur stared horrified and in utter shock at Merlin, Mordred uttered the spell that Morgause had used before, that filled the room with swirling wind and drew his garments up into shreds in the air as he disappeared before their very eyes, leaving a courtroom in shock and with every eye fixed upon Merlin.

"Arthur….," Merlin started in a pleading voice, but he was cut short by the king's curt and icy response. "You will use the proper form of address for your king – and you will do me the courtesy of speaking the truth when I address you."

The tone in Arthur's voice was like a stab to the heart to Merlin, and he saw in Arthur's eyes not only shock and anger, but also deep hurt as the feeling of being betrayed once more began to sweep over him, threatening to engulf him.

Merlin started once again, "Your majesty, I only ever used it for you, not against you!"

"I will be the judge of that." Again, Arthur's tone was cold and hard, and he turned his back on his friend to face the back wall of the court chambers as he said the words. As the members of the court shifted uneasily and looked around at each other, nobody daring to speak, Arthur stared in silence at the wall for a long time, as his mind tried to take in the enormity of what had just happened, and make sense of all the contradictory thoughts and emotions that were besieging him. Merlin couldn't begin to imagine what was going on in Arthur's mind and the king's silent stance gave him no clues, but after what felt like an eternity, he finally turned to Merlin to speak again.

"When did you first use sorcery in Camelot?"

"On the day that I arrived."

"And you have used it ever since then?"

"Yes, sire."

"In my presence?"

"Sometimes, sire."

"Are you in league with Morgana?"

"No, sire – never."

"So, it was a lie that you sent her to the druids?"

"No – that was true - but it was before her magic turned evil."

"So you did know of her magic and yet didn't inform me of it."

"I wanted to…."

Arthur cut any further response short, "And yet you didn't. And have you ever aided others with magic or hidden their identity or helped them to escape?"

Merlin thought of Freya, of Gilli, of Edwin, of the druid woman

"Yes."

"Which of those things?"

"All of them, sire."

Again Arthur paused and his mind began racing over many of the occurrences that had puzzled him over the years. His thoughts came to rest on the appearance of a second dragon. "The dragon's egg. You said it had been destroyed. Was that a lie?"

"Yes, your majesty."

"You took it and deliberately hid it from me?"

"Yes."

"And were you responsible in any way for it hatching?"

"Yes, sire."

Arthur turned away to face the back of the courtroom again, as he struggled with the ever increasing sense of betrayal. "And the release of the dragon – do you know who was responsible for that?"

"Arthur….." There was again both the pleading tone in Merlin's voice and, as Arthur turned back to face him again, the cold expression on Arthur's face that left Merlin feeling he barely knew the person who was standing in front of him at that moment – although Arthur felt exactly the same thing.

"You will answer my question – who released the dragon?"

"I did, your majesty."

Another wave of shock reverberated around the courtroom, and Arthur put out his hand to his chair, as if he needed its arm to steady him.

"Do you know how many innocent people in Camelot died as a result of that dragon?" Arthur spat out the question, his anger evident to all.

"Your majesty!" Again, Gaius tried to intervene. "If you knew the whole story, my lord, you would see Merlin only ever acted for the good."

But Gaius' words acted like another stab in the heart - but this time to Arthur, and when he spoke there was deep hurt in his voice. "You knew all this, Gaius? You knew, but deceived me too?" The sense of betrayal was almost too much for the king, and he knew he had to ask the next question, though he feared asking it more than anything else, and those who knew Arthur well heard the choked tone in his voice as he asked it: "Who else here knew about your magic?"

Merlin paused before answering, and hated the answer he knew he had to give, knowing what it would do to Arthur. "Only Lancelot." And as Merlin had known, the mention of that name only brought to Arthur's mind the memory of how two others close to him had betrayed him, and Merlin could only guess at the pain that Arthur was feeling at the moment, though his own was barely less.

And suddenly the penny dropped – the recognition there had been when he had looked into the eyes of the old sorcerer when he first met him when he had been planting the magic poultice. "It was you, wasn't it?" But Arthur wasn't thinking about the action that had led to Gwen's reprieve from the stake. "It was you who brought about my father's death by your sorcery!"

Again, there were more gasps around the courtroom, and again a desperate attempt to intervene by Gaius.

"My lord – your father was dying anyway, and Merlin's spell which was intended to heal was only thwarted by Morgana."

Gaius thought it unwise to point out to Arthur in public that he had been the one who had sought magic for his father's healing in the first place – but whether Arthur remembered this at that point or not wasn't clear, and he was already in too much inner turmoil to think clearly anyway. He simply added with the same cold tone in his voice as before, "But he hastened my father's death."

And for several moments there was utter silence in the courtroom as Arthur and Merlin looked at each other, and to those in the room it was difficult to tell which of the two was in greater misery – although Arthur's misery at that point was closer to anger and Merlin's closer to despair. And with a coldness that broke Merlin's heart, Arthur finally spoke again.

"One final matter – did you ever use magic on me?"

"Yes."

"And did you ever use it to control me?"

"Yes…." The memory of taking over Arthur's will to get him out of Camelot when he was wounded was still quite fresh in his mind, but the admission of it led to more sounds of shock around the court room, and Merlin added in desperation, "I had to – to save you."

"But you used it to over-rule what you knew I would do?"

"Yes."

Arthur looked pale and too shocked by it all to speak, and for what seemed like an eternity, he just stared at the floor. When he finally looked up and met the eyes for one last time of the one he had called his friend for so long, Merlin just shook his head sadly and said simply and quietly to Arthur, "How could I tell you?" but the king just responded, "How could you not?"

Arthur looked down at the floor for several more moments, and then looked up and towards Merlin, but not looking him in the eye, and in a dull voice began his judgment: "You have been found guilty of sorcery. My father decreed that there was only one sentence that could be passed for that crime…."