Title: TV Night

Author: thebluecheat

Spoilers: Everything up through 2x03 to be safe, but there's really nothing specific. Oh, but if you're a fan of The Walking Dead, there is a small spoiler, kind of.

Rating/Warnings: PG/K+

Word Count: 1120

Disclaimer: I don't own New Girl, but if I did, you can bet that Nick and Jess would get married and make babies. And Cece and Schmidt would never have broken up, because I may have shed a few tears over that. But I don't own NG, so…

Author's Notes: This is my first New Girl fic. It's a one-shot inspired by the line in 2x03 where Nick tells Jess, "You're a big girl, you can watch The Walking Dead alone." I couldn't get it out of my head, and this is what happened. Enjoy!

"I read a spoiler online that somebody dies this season, but it didn't say when. Do you think it's this episode?" Jess asked as she and the guys settled in on the couch with popcorn, beer, and pink wine to watch the season premiere of The Walking Dead.

"Jess! You read spoilers and told me about them? You know how I feel about spoilers!" Schmidt complained next to Jess at the end of the couch. "I like the suspense! I like to be surprised!"

"Spoiler alert, Schmidt," Nick mumbled through a mouthful of popcorn on Jess' other side, "it's a zombie apocalypse, people get eaten and die pretty much all the time."

Schmidt stood up in a huff. "That's it! I'm going to see if I can find a live feed on my laptop!" He stomped dramatically off to his room, ignoring Jess' pleading calls to stay and watch.

On Nick's other side at the opposite end of the couch, Winston's chuckles could be heard. "Good luck getting him to do the dishes tonight, man – he'll be sulking in his room until he falls asleep."

Nick shrugged. "He'll cool off after the show." He turned his head towards Jess to find her upset and sputtering.

"Nick! We agreed that Sunday night was going to be Family Night! Why did you have to upset Schmidt?" she cried.

He turtle-faced her. "Me? You were the one that got all spoiler-y before the opening credits even started! Who knows what you would've said once the show started, you…show-talker! You always talk, or God forbid, sing, your way through everything we watch—"

"Okay, I'm out," Winston interrupted, standing up. "I think I'll see if Schmidt got that live feed up yet, because you're both giving me a headache." He grabbed the popcorn and several beers before letting himself into Schmidt's room.

"Well, that's just great, Jess," Nick huffed, his voice getting louder as he stood up angrily. "You chased Winston away, too!"

"Me?" She yelled, jumping up to face him. "Listen, Turtle Face, I'm not the one who started yelling or who told Schmidt everyone dies! That was all you and your Negative Nancy attitude!"

His turtle face became more pronounced as he moved further into her personal space the angrier he got. "Well, he wouldn't have been upset in the first place if you hadn't started talking about the show! All you ever do is talk! Your lips are always moving! There's so much noise coming out of your mouth whenever we try to watch something that no one can even hear the TV!"

Jess' eyes flashed with anger and hurt. "Well, if you hate watching with me so much, why don't you go watch in Schmidt's room, too?" she yelled, less than a foot from him.

"Because I know you're too afraid to watch this stupid show by yourself, and I don't want you to have nightmares!" he screamed back, inches from her face.

Suddenly, the loft was silent as they both realized what Nick had revealed. Jess' expression softened. "Aww, Nick—"

"Jess—" Nick warned.

"—that's so sweet!" she exclaimed, grabbing his hand and pulling it to her with a huge Jess-smile.

"Please stop now," he begged, sitting back down and pulling his hand back to yank his hood over his head. "I'm just trying to be a good roommate, that's all. Your TV-induced nightmares are really loud, and no one gets any sleep." He glanced up at a teary-eyed Jess. "Oh, my god, Jess, NO—"

"NICKyouarethesweetest—" she sniffled as he cut her off again.

"—STOP making a big deal out of it, right now. Friends don't let friends have zombie nightmares, okay? That's all." He rolled his eyes and pulled her back down onto the couch. "Now sit down, shut up, and watch the damned show."

Jess sat at the other end of the couch, finally silent, but with a goofy Jess-grin, as they turned back to the screen. During their fight, they'd managed to miss the beginning of the episode, but now they were well into the first act.

"Ugh," Jess complained. "I have no idea what's going on."

"Jess…" Nick growled.

"Okay, I'm sorry, I'll try to keep the talking under control," she promised, curling up and hugging her legs to her chest in preparation for something scary or gross to cross the screen.

Almost immediately, the camera zoomed in on a Walker, causing Jess to make a squealing noise and briefly hide her face in her knees. "Is it gone yet?" she asked meekly, her voice somewhat muffled by her pajamas.

"No," Nick replied, his eyes on the screen. He paused, taking a swig of his beer. "Now it is."

Jess sighed with relief as she sat up to watch again. Nick found himself getting annoyed as Jess managed to spaz out at every scene where a Walker got screen time.

"I don't get it, Jess, I really don't," he groaned, as Jess nearly fell off the couch when a large group of Walkers was displayed on the screen right before a commercial break. "The show is about a zombie apocalypse. Zombies freak you out. Why do you continue to watch the show?"

"Because the story is amazing!" Jess replied defensively, drinking from her wine glass. "The world as they know it has collapsed around them, and instead of just giving up, they're fighting to survive and looking out for each other! How can I not watch that?" She paused to take a breath. "And as for the zombies? Haven't you ever been both terrified and fascinated by something at the same time?"

Nick did, in fact, know that feeling. Shark Week was very difficult for him, and Jess was well aware of it. He sighed. "Alright, I get it. Now sit back, the commercial's over and it's starting again."

Naturally, the scene opened on the same group of Walkers from before. Jess began trembling, but visibly made more of an effort to keep it together. Nick glanced at her, rolled his eyes, and scooted closer to her, casually leaning his arm across the back of the couch. Jess caught his eye and smiled gratefully, tucking herself into his side as he brought his arm down to settle around her.

Winston tip-toed back from the kitchen to Schmidt's room and shut the door softly, having just seen a whimpering Jess bury her face in Nick's chest as he stroked her hair. "Hey, Schmidt," he called from the doorway, "got something adorable out there you might want to see. Jess and Nick are—"

"Winston!" Schmidt glared up from his laptop. "What have I said to you about spoilers?"

End.