CHAPTER TWO
MIDWINTER LUCK
Author's Note:
A slight warning to the really young kiddies: This chapter is rather suggestive. It's PG-13 for a reason (but nowhere near NC-17, I can assure you), and it's got some suggestive themes. Lots and lots of romantic fluff, you see. Ah well, proceed.As Sebila's house disappeared over a snow-crested hill, Raoul's bright attitude returned. "Well, our charade' went a bit farther than I had wanted," he said.
"About that." Buri frowned. "I'm sorry. I think I upset your great-aunt — more than once. Also, those women still bothered you."
"Oh, that was nothing." Raoul waved her words away. "As for the other matter, those five ladies were nothing compared to what I usually face at these gatherings. Actually, you brought more life to the party than I expected could be done."
The smile dropped from his face, and he drew in a deep breath. "But when Aunt talked to you that way —" Buri was surprised to see his huge fists clench and unclench. She stared into his face and found that his eyes were stormy.
"Really, it's all right," Buri rushed to assure him, laying a hand on his arm. "I probably deserved it," she admitted, "but it's nothing that should put you out of shape."
Raoul heaved a sigh and nodded, his anger evaporating within moments; he had no temper to speak of. "I know. But I wouldn't let someone — anyone, even family — speak like that to someone I —" The rest of his words, still unsaid, caught up to him, and Raoul swallowed thickly and glanced out the window.
"Someone you . . . ?" Buri prompted, curious.
Raoul looked back at her. All other emotion had left his face, and his expression was strangely unreadable. "Someone I count as a dear friend," he finished in a quiet rumble.
An uncomfortable silence stretched between them, until Buri decided to break it. "I would say that, all in all, this night was a huge adventure," she commented, watching for Raoul's reaction. "New people, new places — even a fight of sorts."
"And Buriram Tourakom, in a dress," Raoul added with a grin, Buri was relieved to see. "Will wonders never cease?"
"It's not such a surprise," Buri retorted. "You saw me in one at the First Night party last Midwinter, anyway."
"That I did," Raoul answered. "How many of those do you own, young lady?" he inquired with a grin.
"Three, actually," Buri shot back.
"I've already seen two, then," Raoul noted. "When will I have the pleasure of seeing you in another?"
"I guess you'll have to take me to another party like this," Buri answered, a mischievous light dancing in her eyes.
Raoul answered her challenge with a broad grin, and a peculiar thought entered Buri's mind: Were we flirting?
"Buri," Raoul asked after a moment's silence, "would you like to come inside?" The K'mir started and blinked confusedly. Was it coincidence that he had asked her that when she was having the most uncharacteristic thoughts?
At her puzzled look, Raoul added, "I need to know, so my driver can take you to your rooms — or to mine. You could just stay for a drink," he offered.
Buri thought it over and nodded. "For a little while, all right."
Raoul smiled and leaned out the window to relay the order to the driver. The carriage bumped along over icy cobblestones until it reached Raoul's suite of rooms, located near the barracks in case of an emergency departure with the Own.
Raoul stepped out first and offered his hand to Buri, who took it as she got out of the carriage. Raoul flipped the driver a silver coin, and the man tipped his hat and guided the horses to the stables.
The snow had begun to fall again, and already the stones under their feet were slippery and hard to walk on. The two ran across the yard to Raoul's doorway, snowflakes gathering on their heads and shoulders. Buri stood with her back to Raoul and waited for him to find the key to his rooms.
Suddenly, standing next to Raoul was harder for her than it had ever been before. Buri felt keenly aware of the warmth of his body, a few feet away from hers; in the silence, she could hear his breathing.
The strange thing was, she had been noticing things like this since the beginning of the party. You were pretending to be Raoul's lover, Buri reminded herself sternly. There is no way that anything you said — about the two of us being involved — will ever be true.
And yet — they had been flirting in the carriage, when coming and going to the party. At least, Buri thought they were; it sounded different than their normal, teasing banter. Unless, they had always been flirting and never realizing it. Now that she thought about it, she could be attracted to Raoul; he was a good man, not at all arrogant, a good sense of humor --
Stop it
, Buri told herself firmly. Her head was starting to ache with this buildup of unexpected and puzzling thoughts. I'm not an idealist, and I won't begin to act like one. There is no way Raoul is having the same romantic thoughts as me.She turned around to ask what was taking so long, and Raoul leaned forward and kissed her on the lips.
Or maybe he is.
Over the years, Buri had learned what she thought was everything about Raoul, from his sense of humor to his ridiculous adherence to chivalry. But this – this was a whole new side to her large friend. Of course, Buri had been present at times when Raoul had been involved with women, but she had never taken notice of his actions when it came to romance.
Buri's eyes widened; but something stopped her from pulling away, and she slowly closed her eyes and surrendered. The kiss itself, however unexpected, was amazing in its power and fervor. Raoul's lips pressed firmly on her own, but not too hard. Warmth spread from his mouth to hers, and with it, a strange feeling of excitement. The heat of his kiss awakened a spark in her, and Buri found herself responding with ardor. Her mind failed to work, and she had no knowledge that this was Raoul, Knight Commander of the King's Own as well as close friend and companion. No; the man who kissed her was an attractive – though it had never crossed her mind before – knight who was interested in her as something more than a friend.
Raoul wrapped his arms around Buri and pulled her snugly against his body. She gave a gasp, which was followed by an involuntary moan as she felt Raoul's hard, muscled chest under the fabric of his tunic. His hands traveled up and down her back in slow, gentle strokes before coming to rest on her arms, clutching her against him – surprisingly, Buri had no wish to move away.
They broke the kiss but remained in their embrace, their breaths steaming in the frigid air as they took in deep gulps of oxygen. Raoul's hands still gripped Buri's arms, and she was well aware of the foolish grin that was plastered on her face.
With an effort she tried to calm the fluttering in her body. Once she trusted her voice, she accused, "I bet you've been planning that all night."
Raoul wore the same goofy smile. "Actually, I thought of it about two moments ago." He wet his lips and added, "Well — I've been thinking about us" — Us? Buri wondered — "since the party began, but I just had the idea to kiss you —"
Buri would have laughed out loud had she not been worried about ruining the moment. Shy Raoul — though he had rarely acted as such around her — was chattering senselessly! Buri raised herself on her toes and gave him a peck on the lips, effectively silencing him. Raoul seemed to take this as encouragement, and slid his mouth over hers again. Buri settled into the increasingly familiar cradle of his arms. Without realizing it, her hands moved up his chest, gently caressing, to his neck. They drew their lips away for a fraction of a second; then, seeing no reproach in either person's eyes, they kissed again, gaining zeal as they continued. The spark in Buri's body was steadily being nursed to a flame. Raoul placed his hands on her lower back, and the flame flared strongly, sending warmth shooting through Buri's limbs.
She surprised and disgusted herself with her lovesick reaction – But why? part of her questioned. He wants me as much as I want him; it's not as if one of us is forcing the other. That part of her aside, soon one thing would lead to another, and Buri had to leave before things progressed that far.
Buri pushed, gently but firmly, against Raoul's chest. He sent her a look of concern, and Buri met his eyes. Though they were darkened with passion, he was still in control of his feelings. Buri knew that he would never do anything she didn't want.
She swallowed, enjoying the taste of him still lingering on her mouth. "I should go back home," she finally said.
"You don't have to leave." His piercing gaze caught her eyes and held her in place as firmly as his hands had grasped her arms.
Her hand smoothed a wrinkle in his tunic as she tried to make sense of her whirlwind of thoughts and emotions. "I don't want to leave," Buri admitted in a whisper, and Raoul swept her up in another heated kiss.
Yet, they still hesitated. When they broke away again, both saw the indecision mirrored in the eyes of the other. It was true that they both wanted this, but the result could ruin the relationship they had built up over the years. They had a strong, resilient friendship – but it seemed a tiny, fragile thing compared to the heat of this moment.
The rational part of Buri's mind spoke up then, telling her what she had always known but never really thought about: Raoul was honest, and not one to toy with a woman's emotions. She had known him long enough to be aware that he would never trick anyone – least of all her – into bed. With a sharp intake of breath, Buri realized that this wasn't a game; Raoul sincerely meant everything that had passed between them in the last few minutes.
Raoul cupped her face in his hand. "This is all right for us to do." Was he trying to convince her? Or himself? "We're both consenting adults," he whispered. "That is, if – Do you consent?"
As an answer, Buri kissed him soundly. Raoul held her tightly and responded with a deep kiss. His passion crested over Buri in powerful waves, causing her to tremble. He had been holding back before, keeping his emotions in check so he wouldn't force this on her. That made their next kiss all the sweeter.
Small white flakes lazily floated to the ground as they kissed heatedly in the doorway, each craving further exploration of the other. Raoul pulled his key out of his pocket and fumbled to place it in the lock, his deft fingers unusually clumsy.
With an effort, Raoul opened the door, and they stumbled inside Raoul's pitch-black study. He broke the kiss suddenly, with a whispered, "Kel."
Trying to catch her breath, Buri raised a questioning eyebrow. "Should I be worried that you have your squire on your mind at a time like this?"
Raoul laughed, a smile spreading over his face. "Oh, no, I didn't mean it like that. For all we know, Kel could be next door. I want to make sure she isn't . . ." Buri waited in Raoul's study, hands on hips, until he returned, shaking his head. "She must be out with the Yamanis; it's Midwinter, after all."
"That leaves us alone," Buri whispered, her hand returning to the back of his neck. Raoul didn't hesitate to lean his face down so he could touch his mouth to hers again. Buri returned the intensity of his kiss and wrapped both her arms around his broad shoulders. As the kiss deepened, their actions grew bolder. One of Buri's hands began to stroke through Raoul's hair, and he lifted her onto his desk. There was a rustling as several sheets of parchment fluttered to the ground, disturbed by Buri's abrupt seating on the wooden surface. Neither noticed. Buri gave a quiet gasp when Raoul's hand slipped under her skirts and grazed her thigh.
They pulled back at the same time. Raoul was panting, and his black eyes stared past Buri for several moments before re-focusing on her face. "Let's continue this somewhere else," he whispered, and she nodded breathlessly.
Raoul took Buri by the hand and led her through the dining room, to his private chamber. As they reached the doorway, they fell back into a frenzied embrace. Buri's quick hands found the fastening to Raoul's tunic, and she began to tug it off his body.
"Into the room," Raoul gasped when they were forced to come up for air, "before we undress each other here." They made it inside, and Raoul reluctantly pulled away to light a branch of candles. Their light gave his bedroom a steady glow. When he looked at Buri, a gasp slipped from his lips. She looked ethereal and holy, surrounded by orange light.
His body several steps ahead of his brain, he pulled her back to him by her waist. Buri gladly accepted his embrace, and more heated kisses followed as their hands began to move again. She succeeded in pulling off his tunic and throwing it in a corner. She then amused herself by tracing patterns over his chest, learning the contours of his muscles and skin.
Raoul matched her passion, his hands starting on her back and trailing down until he reached the laces of her bodice. Buri grabbed his hands then, and Raoul broke the kiss to look down into her eyes. There was no anger or reproach, just a twinkle of mischief in her black eyes.
Buri stepped back a few paces, into the pool of candlelight. She turned around, her back to Raoul. He watched her, confused, searching for any sign that he had offended her. But again, Buri wasn't in the wrong mood.
Buri looked over her shoulder at him, and their eyes locked. The look in her eyes was one Raoul had seen in many women, some he had had as lovers, but he would never have expected to see it in Buri.
She kept her hands in front of her chest, out of Raoul's sight. Nothing happened for several moments, until he realized that Buri was unlacing her dress. Mesmerized, he watched the sapphire-blue material slide over her shoulders, leaving them bare. Buri quickly but carefully slipped the dress off, and she turned to face him again. She reached up one hand and pulled the pins out of her hair. There were only a few, and a moment later her long black hair dropped to gently brush against her neck and shoulders. She wore only her breastband and loincloth. The contrast of her tanned skin and the white material of her undergarments, combined with the ghostly candlelight, made her appear to glow.
Buri slowly approached Raoul, an alluring smile on her face. She placed her hands on his bare chest again and leaned into kiss him. He let out a small moan and grabbed her arms with his big hands. He held her firmly against him as Buri's steady hands worked to unlatch his belt. Raoul easily stepped out of his hose, pulling Buri's body closer to his. Now it was her turn to cry out softly, and he felt her heart pounding against his chest.
They slowly drew away again to study one another. Both wore only their undergarments. Black eyes locked on black, filled with the same intentions.
Their mouths joined for another passionate kiss. Buri let her hands wander along Raoul's chest until they reached his hip. Glancing up at him through her eyelashes, she fiddled with the edges of his loincloth.
"I'm tingling with anticipation," she whispered. It was the first time either had spoken for some time, and her voice was low and husky. "Are you going to keep me waiting?"
"I wouldn't dream of it," Raoul answered, deadly serious. He bent his head to kiss her throat hungrily, eliciting a moan. The cord of a necklace was in his way, and Raoul brushed it aside. He paused when he saw the golden letter that would have been unrecognizable had he not learned about it from other women he had encountered.
"Charm against pregnancy," he murmured, resuming his actions on Buri's neck. "Seems every woman's got one." Buri just laughed and swatted his hand away.
Raoul raised his head again, and Buri accepted his burning kiss with ardor. "I know how impatient you can get," Raoul reminded her in gasps between their kisses.
"As can you," she retorted. Her breath quickened when she looked up into his eyes and saw the lust there. Their banter came to an abrupt halt, as other things quickly became more important.
-=-=-=-=-
Buri clung to Raoul's body in the aftermath of their coupling, as they waited for their breathing to slow. Raoul stroked her back with his calloused hands, and he whispered "Buri" against her lips. She pressed her face against his sweaty neck, trying to calm the rapid beating of her heart.
After a time, Raoul slipped out of the tangle of their bodies and went around his study to blow out the candles. Buri slowly raised herself on one elbow and watched him move around the room, a dark shape against the descending blackness.
Raoul sat down lightly on the edge of his bed and turned his head to hers. Even in the darkness, Buri could feel his calm, steady gaze probing her.
She crawled over to Raoul and tentatively stroked his cheek with one hand. Feeling bolder, Buri threw her arms around his neck and kissed him warmly. Raoul pulled her down on top of him, and the all-consuming passion overtook them for a second time.
-=-=-=-=-
The faint sound of a door opening caused Buri to turn her head. There was no more noise, however, and she resettled her head on Raoul's shoulder. The rise and fall of his chest as he breathed deeply was comforting.
She'd always known Raoul to be a steady friend, but she'd never expected to find that in him as a lover. Actually, she hadn't known what to expect. They had been friends for years, with everything they had in common: they were both fighters, both free spirits, both loved the rulers they served. They had made it through countless skirmishes and battles and had grown from comrades to real friends.
That was why Buri had agreed to come along to the party -- to help her friend. They had always been there for each other, through easy and hard times. But now the tables had been turned, and she wasn't sure if she should enjoy this change or fight to return to their platonic relationship.
Raoul was kind and generous. Yet his passion burned hungrily like a flame and could not be doused for a long time. When they were finally spent, he held her close to him and whispered tender endearments in her ear while he kissed her neck and shoulder. He was honest and considerate. Raoul was one of the few good men (though she had met many more once she had come to Corus) who honored women as more than possessions. And he had certainly honored her this night, Buri thought with a quiet laugh. She had heard that he was good to women, but she had never guessed that he was this good!
So here they lay, twisted with each other and the blankets. One of Raoul's large hands rested possessively on her hip, and Buri pressed her face to his chest to breathe in the aroma of sweat and even her own scent that lingered on him.
"What is it?" Raoul asked, his deep voice even clearer in the stillness of the night.
Buri tilted her head back to look him in the eye, but most of his face was hidden in darkness. "I thought you were asleep."
"Haven't you heard? I don't sleep. I don't know how anyone has time to, in this busy realm."
Buri laughed, filled with warmth and comfort that she was surprised she could still find with her friend-turned-lover. Her heart sank, and with it her good mood, as she considered her own thoughts. How would they continue their relationship after the events of this Midwinter night? They had gotten more than a little carried away, and at the moment she couldn't think of how they would face each other after —
Raoul nudged her, shaking Buri out of her thoughts. "I know you, Buri. What is it?"
Buri sighed unhappily; half of her wished she weren't speaking, that she would not ruin this moment. "What's next?" she finally whispered.
The hand on her hip traced a path up her side and to her face, brushing back her hair with a gentle tenderness. "I was thinking, we could have a few more bouts of lovemaking, then maybe —"
"That's not what I meant, and you know it, Raoul," Buri scolded, holding back the urge to giggle. "What do we do after this?" she asked. "Are we still friends, or . . ."
"We're always friends," Raoul said firmly. "Nothing can or will change that. But, after tonight . . ." He sighed deeply and gazed at the woman lying beside him. "I don't think I could settle for only friendship between us."
Buri smiled, though Raoul couldn't see it. "Neither could I."
"In the morning, we can talk about the interesting position we've found ourselves in," Raoul decided, and Buri nodded in agreement. His arm encircled her, and Buri curled her body closer to his, placing her hands on his chest.
They lay together in comfortable silence. After a few minutes, Buri felt Raoul's chest trembling, and she realized he was chuckling quietly.
"What's so funny?" she demanded.
"Kel said you wouldn't get any romantic notions," he replied, and Buri couldn't help but smile too.
"And do you always listen to Kel?" she inquired teasingly.
"She suggested that I bring you as my guest to the party," Raoul retorted.
"Well, then, gods bless her," Buri smirked.
A door slammed open, shattering the still silence of the night. Raoul and Buri, reflexes sharpened by fighting, sat up at the same time. They looked wildly around the pitch-black room, then exchanged confused glances.
"Bitch!" a man screamed; it was the raw yell of grief, pain, and murderous intentions. There was a shrieking of sparrows and what sounded like Jump's barks. The animals' noises were followed by "Trollop, you killed my boy!" accompanied by a series of guttural curses.
Raoul shoved the covers off his body and slid to the edge of his bed. He groped around on the floor until he found his sword; soundlessly he slid it out of the sheath. The cold gray metal glinted dangerously as he stood up.
Buri tossed him his loincloth. "Here." After a moment, Raoul nodded distractedly and pulled on the undergarment.
Buri whipped a blanket off the bed and wrapped it around her shoulders as she dug around in her pile of clothes. She eventually found the small dagger she kept in case of an emergency. By the time she stood up, Raoul had already made it to the door and had opened it a fraction. Light from his study streamed in through the crack, and Buri ran to his side.
Together, they stepped into Raoul's study, but no one was there. Someone had lit a branch of candles that illuminated the room. The adjoining door to Kel's room was closed, but they could hear the man's screams coming from it.
Raoul flung open the door and stepped into Kel's room, Buri at his elbow. All eyes turned to them: Kel, two grief-stricken people with tear-stained faces, and the man who had screamed, now clawing at the sparrows that covered his face. The pale blue light that streamed in through an opened window illuminated the whole scene; Raoul was surprised to note that it was dawn.
"Birds, move," ordered Raoul. The sparrows flew off the man's face and alighted on Kel's shoulders, allowing Raoul to grab the man by his tunic and slam him against the wall. The knight ordered Jump to let go as well; with reluctance, Jump backed off.
It wasn't until he saw the man's tangled white-blond hair that Raoul recognized Joren of Stone Mountain's father. Raoul's stomach plummeted with a heavy feeling of dread as he remembered that Joren's Ordeal had been that night.
While Raoul held Burchard of Stone Mountain firmly against the wall, the man's wife and brother explained how the Chamber had opened on Joren's corpse. Burchard sent several curses Kel's way, only to be silenced by a furious shake from Raoul.
"Go bury your boy," Raoul finally ordered Burchard, flinging him to the ground. He understood and sympathized with those who grieved, but he knew he would not be able to tolerate any more insults to his squire's honor and his own. Almost trembling with rage, he didn't put down his sword until the three adults had left. His white-hot anger suddenly left him, and he dropped his sword to the floor and rubbed his face.
"Gods, I need a drink," he murmured.
"Shall I get you one?" Kel asked.
"Not the kind I meant," Raoul told her, "if you don't mind. Juice, water — no liquor. It turns me into someone I don't like." Kel nodded as she pulled her clothes on over her nightgown. She was visibly trembling.
Raoul didn't want Kel to take Burchard's words to heart. However, as he, Kel, and Buri discussed the matter, Kel's coming had changed Joren. The Chamber had brought out the real side of him that only Kel had known, and now he had paid for it.
The excitement of the night — well, half of it, at least — over, Buri began to walk back into Raoul's study. "I am going back to bed," she said, glancing pointedly at him. "Well?"
Raoul grinned. Things were looking up after all. After saying good night to Kel, he followed Buri into his study and closed the door behind them.
Buri sat down heavily on Raoul's bed. She had wrapped the blanket around herself like a toga. He sat across from her, and they regarded each other silently.
There was a knock on the door to his study. "Sir?"
Raoul looked away from Buri. "Come in, Kel."
Kel entered, bearing a tray with two cups and a pitcher. "Is fruit juice all right, my lord?"
Raoul smiled. "Perfect. Thank you, Kel." She turned to go. "Oh, Buri — would you prefer something stronger?" Raoul asked.
The K'mir shook her head. She knew about Raoul's strong dislike of alcohol, because of a past incident. "Fruit juice is fine. Thanks, Kel." The squire smiled and nodded; then she left, closing the door to the study again.
"She's a good girl," Raoul said. "Got to love that Yamani calm — she didn't even bat an eye when she saw us."
Raoul poured a cup for Buri, then himself, and handed her drink to her. She accepted it with a smile, then suddenly became interested in the juice. Raoul sighed, swallowed his drink in one gulp, and set to pouring himself another one.
Buri finished her cup but didn't refill it. "What about —" she started, but Raoul leaned forward and placed his fingers on her lips.
"Not now," he whispered, letting his hand drop. "In the morning, we'll talk about it." Buri looked up and met his eyes. Without looking away, she nodded.
"It's about dawn, you know," Raoul informed her as he stood up from the bed. "You might want to get some sleep, though; no one will miss you if you sleep in."
Raoul placed the cups and pitcher back on the tray and carried it to the door. He then returned to his room, where Buri was climbing into the bed. Without a word, Raoul got in on the other side and settled himself. Buri didn't speak but lay down as well, with her back to him. They weren't completely naked, as they had been before; now clothed, there were barriers between them.
"Good night," Buri whispered.
Raoul slid an arm around her and drew her against him. Buri considered pulling away from his warm body — then she wondered, What's the use?
"Good night," Raoul said, and kissed her cheek; a friendly kiss, though the arm he held around her suggested otherwise.
Buri found herself grabbing his hand and twining her fingers with his. Her heart fluttered when his fingers touched hers, and again she felt comfort from his presence, so close to her.
Maybe I'm just giddy,
she chastised herself.But it feels so right.
-=-=-=-=-
One thing Raoul loved about Midwinter was the opportunity to sleep in. What with the errands for the kingdom that the Own performed, as well as his regular schedule during the year, he gratefully took advantage of any late mornings.
Raoul lifted his head from his pillow, surveyed the room, and prepared to close his eyes again when he noticed that he wasn't alone in his bed. A tanned leg hung off the other side of the bed, and he could see the small form of Buri's body hidden under the blankets she had twisted around herself in her sleep.
Raoul sat up and blinked slowly, his mind taking several extra moments to catch up. Memories of the previous night returned to him quickly, and suddenly he remembered why his best female friend was asleep, not to mention nude, in his bed at ten o'clock in the morning.
Raoul clasped his hands under his chin and expelled a breath of air. "Oh, wow," he whispered to himself, sneaking a glance at his new lover. The previous night had swiftly climbed his list of eventful things, topped only by the times he'd fought a giant and a monstrous serpent, and the time Alanna had revealed her true sex. Raoul grinned and slowly shook his head, actually amused by the situation.
Raoul paused before getting out of bed, listening to Buri's steady breathing. He vaguely remembered falling asleep with one arm wrapped around Buri's waist and her small hand clasped in his own. Now their hands were no longer joined, but he could feel the warmth of her body still lying next to his.
With a reluctant sigh, Raoul hoisted his body out of the rumpled bed and headed for the privy and his dressing room. After a quick, not to mention cold, wash, Raoul dressed in a comfortable linen shirt, black breeches, and sturdy black boots.
Kel had left a note explaining that she had gone out to train with Peachblossom and visit her friends. Raoul suspected that his squire had made up the excuse to give him and Buri time to talk. Or, maybe she hadn't wanted to see the two half-clothed adults the morning after. Come to think of it, it would have been a very embarrassing experience for all.
Thanking the gods for Kel's good sense, Raoul re-entered his bedroom. He stopped short, his mouth suddenly dry.
Buri stood by the bed with its wrinkled sheets and pillows, a thick blanket wrapped around her. Her dark, tangled hair streamed over her bare shoulders. Her only other article of clothing was her loincloth.
At that moment, Buri could rival the Great Mother Goddess herself, Raoul was sure. He willed himself to swallow so he could have some hope of speaking, as he regarded her with unrestrained admiration.
Buri broke the silence by tightening the blanket around her torso with an uncharacteristically shy smile. "Good morning," she murmured, but her eyes locked with Raoul's.
"Morning," he echoed softly. Unable to bear the distance between them at the moment, he swiftly strode forward and hugged her tightly. Even now he was unsure of what to do; it wasn't a feeling he was used to.
Buri rested her head against his chest and sighed in relief. She had been afraid that, after their night together, their friendship would be ruined. But things were as good as they had always been, perhaps better.
Raoul had given her his word. And he always kept it.
"How did you sleep?" the big knight asked, and Buri looked into his face. He had the gentlest smile, and his eyes were warm. Buri felt indescribably safe in his arms at that moment; she knew he would never do anything to hurt her.
"Fine. Better than fine," she answered, a smile appearing on her face. "You?"
He whistled softly. "Great. Absolutely great."
All other words died in their throats; they were relieved that there were no problems, but neither had any idea what to say next. Buri dropped her gaze to the ground, and she noticed Raoul scuffing the floor with his boot.
Buri sent herself a smarting mental smack and gathered the courage to look back up. Raoul's face brightened when their eyes locked again.
"I'm sorry," Buri said softly. "I'm acting like a lovesick teenager," she explained as she silently berated herself; "as if I've never had experience with these things."
"You don't have to apologize," Raoul hastily replied. "I'm not able to say much either," he said with a rueful smile.
Buri sighed through gritted teeth. "I don't know exactly how to go about this," she admitted, her shoulders slumping. A new idea presented itself to her, and Buri rushed on, "Do you want time to think about it? This is new, and different —"
Raoul kissed her, and it was as warm and fierce as their first. "I want things to be different," he whispered. "This should be special, and it will be, if you want it."
Buri was overcome by the emotion she saw in his eyes. "I do want this," she found herself proclaiming. "Gods, I want this." Raoul took in a breath sharply and kissed her passionately; this kiss was the roughest so far.
Buri trembled, momentarily giving in to the urgency of his kiss. It was only a few steps to the bed, she realized. Besides, she was almost undressed, as it was. Her hand tightened in his shirt, but she willed herself to release her grip on the garment.
"Mm . . . not now," she gasped softly, breaking the kiss. "We can't . . . not now," she repeated, unsure if she made any sense.
She could see regret in his eyes, but also reluctant agreement. "All right. I hope to see you again," Raoul murmured.
Buri clasped his hand. "I'm sure you will," she replied with a twinkle in her eyes. The smile dropped from her face, and she sighed. "I had better be leaving, before the castle gossips have time to make up rumors about us."
Raoul nodded, smiling ruefully. He waited in his study, giving Buri privacy to dress. She emerged a few minutes later, carrying a bundle with her extra hairpins and the like. She was dressed in the clothes she had worn the night before.
Buri stood up on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. "Good-bye, Raoul." She stopped at the door to his chambers and turned back, a mischievous grin on her face. "By the way -- last night was incredible." She turned and left his room, quickly stepping outside and running through the slush back to the palace.
Raoul stood still, contemplating Buri's words. His face split into a huge grin of male satisfaction. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he set to righting his desk, his step considerably lighter.
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If Thayet knew why Buri had returned in the morning, wearing the same gown as the night before, with her hair in tangled disarray, she didn't let on.
The Queen bit her lip to hide her laughter as her friend stepped into her room. "The party was better than you thought, hmm?" she called as Buri began setting up a bath for herself.
Buri leaned back in the steaming water and sighed as the heat helped to drive some of the cold from her bones — like a certain knight had done. "Much better."
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