Disclaimer: I do not own anything Twilight related and I make no money writing this.

Alert: Not for Twilight fans, flames will be ignored, character death and bashing… and mocking… characters.

A/N: This was written for my English class when we were doing strange addictions and we were told to use 'new' words in sentences and this is what it turned out to be. Funny how everyone liked it, even the Twilight fans... ^-^

How Twilight should have ended

Bella was horrible at sports. That was a fact and it didn't change when she moved to Forks to live with her father.

She had been going out with Edward Cullen, who she found out was, along with his family, a vampire, and decided to fix one of her many flaws. (Well, there's no cure for being an insufferable teenage girl obsessed with her boyfriend.) So she spoke to her friends, Mike and Jessica and they helped her out. She took up volleyball, or at least tried to. Soon she was bitten by the bug, even though she wasn't all that good at it… let's be serious here, she was awful, but bitten by the bug she was.

To get better, she decided to keep fit. Not only did it improve her playing style, a bit, but she looked and felt good. And because she felt good and looked good, she took it to the extremes. She played and exercised like there was no tomorrow and that took its toll on her.

She wound up in the hospital where Dr. Cullen was on duty at the time. He tried to help the girl his son was so obsessed with and he couldn't, even turning her into one of them would have been fatal. At least this way there was a chance for her to… nope, a mistake, she just died.

'Oh well. Edward will mope but he'll get over it and stalk another girl, and at least this way Charlie and Rene would be able to get some closure.' Thought Carlisle

And so the death of one Isabella Swan brought the end of Twilight Series we so love to hate and without further ado please join in the holiday spirits and sing the carols with us:

"Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away,

Bella dies, Jacob cries, Potter all the way, YEAH!"