Roxas layed his flowers down on the casket. Red roses, her favorite, or at least they used to be. It was a closed casket funeral, they said her body was too mangled from the wreck. It had been a head on collision with another driver who had been texting. The cops guessed by the way they hit that she tried to swerve out the way, but failed. The other driver was unhurt. Roxas found it unfair how the guy got away with his life while he was left motherless. He could feel the endless swell of water growing behind his eyes, but he refused to let them flow. He backed away from the casket and turned around.

He was immediately enveloped in Cara's arms. She had been her mother's closest friend, but Roxas barely knew her, even after the countless visits to their house. Tears dripped down her face as she told him everything would be ok, and if he ever needed someone to talk to she would listen. Roxas knew she would not be there, people always said things like that in times of great sorrow like this, but still he nodded his head and smiled. She wiped his cheek with her thumb. Roxas had not even realized he had been crying until she brushed the wetness with her fingers. She gave him one last tight motherly hug, saying once again how it would all be ok, and walked off.

Roxas slid into the front pew heavily and buried his face into his hands. He needed to stop the faucet before it exploded. He did not want the people here to see him like that. Correction, he would not let them see him like this. He held his breath. One... two... three... four... five... six...seven... eight... nine... ten... and he continued onto thirty, which was when the tears finally stopped. He breathed out. He had not felt the need for air even after that long moment of nothingness.

The seat next to him collapsed, signifying someone sitting down right next to him. He did not bother looking up when a gentle hand landed on his back. He did not need to see who it was as another hand wrapped around him. He knew that gentleness anywhere. He looked up into his sister's usually vibrant green eyes, that are now dulled over, and smiled, "I'm okay Lumaria,"Although his stuffy voice and red eyes said otherwise.

Her voice was gentle as she spoke careingly to Roxas , "You don't have to act tough, they will understand."

Roxas shrugged his shoulders, "Then why have you not cried this whole time." Roxas kept his eye on her, afraid she would do something drastic, and not once had he seen her shed a tear or even go to the bathroom. She just nodded her head and smiled sadly at people and laughed when they would mention old memories. Roxas knew her to well, and could easily tell every jester and laugh was fake. He knew she felt nothing, it was how she coped with things. Lumaria would block out every emotion of sadness and go along with the flow. In fact the only time he had seen her cry about it was when she first found out before she could put up her defenses. He was pretty sure only their mom and him had ever seen her cry. He admired her for being so strong.

Her gentle eyes did not waver, "Don't worry about me Roxy-"

"I don't want you to call me that anymore. The name died with mom, "his mother had always called him that, unless she was angry, then she called him by his full name; Roxas Paul Duncan.

"I won't anymore." Roxas looked back down to the ground and it was quiet between the two once again. Roxas wanted to spill his guts to her. Tell her the sadness he felt and ask her how to deal with it. He wanted a shoulder to cry on that he could trust. Roxas looked back up at her about to speak when she did.

"This will be the biggest party of the year, ya' know."

Roxas blinked, and reality flooded back to him. He was in the car driving to some party with Seifer and Rai. Rai's voice had invaded his memory, then Seifer spoke from the driver's seat, "I know Rai, that is the tenth time today," he sounded irritated as he glanced at the darker male from the corner of his eye, trying not to take his eyes off the road. Pretty safe driver, even though he would probably would come home hammered.

Roxas resumed looking out the window as the car fell back into silence after Rai's pathetic attempt to start conversation. This party was supposedly the biggest party of the year, and like any big get together of wild unsupervised teenagers, there would be drugs and booze. This would be Roxas's first big party, but he was not sure why he was going with these guys. They were pretty much the most hated guys at school. He was surprised they still got invited to these things. Then again, your really not invited, you just have to be in the know to know, and obviously, Seifer was in the know. Somehow.

Roxas sighed, "How much longer?" The place they were going to was somewhere deep in the woods out of town. They had been driving at least for a hour now.

Seifer answered, "Don't be such a winny-baby."

Roxas rolled his eyes, "I just want to know how much longer."

"Ten minutes." Roxas could practically feel him rolling his eyes.

The car resumed its previous silence. Roxas watched the trees outside the window ease by as they drove on the gravel road rather slowly. The first sign of the party was when the music drifted to them faintly through the woods, slowly growing louder and louder. When they rounded a corner lights suddenly bursted through the darkness. A ginormous house, almost equivalent to a mansion, sat in the middle of a very large clearing. Roxas could not believe the size of the house the party was at. He could not understand why someone would want to ruin a house like that with a bunch of teenagers. Roxas saw the fore mentioned littering the front yard like garbage, drinks being sloshed all around as they yelled and stumbled. Some seemed to be heading to their cars. They found a relatively far parking place.

Seifer turned around and smirked at Roxas's expression, "Big party, huh?"

Roxas releveled his features and nodded his head and sighed, attempting to sound nonchalant, "Yep."

Seifer was the first to get out of the car then the burnet leaned in the door way, "I know this is your first party, so follow me Roxy. I'll show you where the fun is at."

Was it really that obvoise that he had never been to a party like this before? Roxas went to protest but Seifer spoke again before he could, "And don't try to lie about it and say this isn't your first party, because it's obvious."

Roxas crossed his arms after he stepped out of the car. He unconsciously lowered his head and followed behind Rai and Seifer, who where already a few feet ahead. They walked through the teens without flinching and even said hi to a few, while Roxas squirmed his way through, dodging and avoiding contact with the drunkards. Finally, they made it to the front door. Seifer just pushed open the door an walked inside, leaving the doorway wide open. Roxas was only a few steps behind him.

The music was blaring and it hit him with full force, nearly making him cover his ears. Roxas could barely hear himself think as he looked around the room at all the unfamiliar faces and bodies. Some couples made out against the walls and on the couches, while the majority of the people danced and grinded against each other to the beat. Roxas was unable to discern the faces from one another. It was one large mass of sweat and skin.

The teens bumped into them as they forced their way through the nonexistent space between the. This was defiantly not Roxas's type of crowd. Too many posers and druggist and want to bes. Roxas tried his best to keep up with Seifer and heads bobbed up and down through the crowd in front of the blond. Quickly they got further and further away from Roxas, and eventually they were lost to the crowd. He fought and shoved the 'young adults' trying to make it to a wall so he could sit and think. The blond was finally spat out at a beige wall near a doorway where a blond sat against it, smoking a cigarette. The music was not as loud here. He leaned against the surface and examined the crowd for Seifer and Rai with no avail. Roxas sighed as he slid down the wall. Roxas could not believe that he lost them. He was so stupid!

Roxas thumped his head against the surface rather hard, looked up, and closed his eyes.

"You don't look like you belong to this crowd." a british voice came very nonchalantly from beside him.

Roxas snapped his head to the right. It had been the blonde smoking a cigarette who had spoken, "And you look to old to be here." He sported a short caesar style hair cut, a goatee, and blue eyes. His ears were overly decorated with four helix piercings in the form of two hoops on each ear and one piercing that was some odd symbol dangling from his left earlobe. He looked to be at least thirty.

He smirked, "You play the game well." he paused, "May I ask who you are in search for?" He showed almost no reaction to Roxas. The stranger's blue eyes remained motionless set on his own blue ones. It almost seemed like a challenge to Roxas, and he was not one to back down from a challenge.

"Seifer." Roxas was not really sure why he told him, for all he knew he was a creepy stalker person who had been after him for months.

After a long pause the stranger broke his gaze from his to scan the crowd, "That is not difficult what so ever." he stood up and looked down at Roxas, "Follow me." He then began to walk without a second glance behind him to make sure Roxas was following him. Roxas quickly stood and proceeded after him. They stayed closed to the wall as they walked and Roxas made sure he stated centimeters away form the stranger.

"Sure is lucky I found you," Roxas sai not really expecting him to hear him over the music.

"Luck's like that. A window of opportunity can open and close in the blink of an eye. It's whether or not you can jump on the chance when it arises that determines a man's fate. " he said in response, surprising Roxas.

The younger blond did not know what enticed the man to say that, but he wanted to know more about what he ment. Although before he got the chance to ask he stopped and spoke again, "We have arrived." He had stopped in front of a dark purple door which said 'no entry' on it.

"We sh-" but before Roxas could finish, the brit had already opened and gone through the door. After hesitating for a moment, the blonde followed behind the other blond.

The room was dark with a single, shortly lamp in the middle of a group of people sitting in a did not see the blond that led him in here anywhere. Roxas searched their faces, looking for Seifer. One had lilet colored hair over one eye and another older one had silver hair that came down to his shoulders and the one sitting not to him had blue hair, and the one next to him looked to be about fifty and had blond hair to his shoulders, then finally he met Seifer's eyes. Something was off about him, but Roxas could not quite tell what due to the dim light. Rai was sitting next to him.

"Heyyyyy Roxysh!" his voice slurred as he stood up. This had to be the most excited and happy he had ever seen the burnet.

"Uhhh.. Hi?" Roxas was not sure what to make of the situation. There was obviously something wrong with Seifer.

"Coooome here!" he practically yelled as he made an over zealous hand gesture.

"Ummmmmm...Okay?" Roxas crossed his arms and walked over to Seifer who had sat down and was pushing the guy next to him, who happened to be the emo kid, trying to make room. When Roxas sat down he was about to question Seifer about what they were doing when the guy next to him elbowed him in the rib-cage the blonde turned his gaze towards him when something was shoved into his hands.

His eyes grew wide as it dawned on him what they were doing. He looked at the pipe in his hands. He had never really thoughabout drugs before. All he really knew about them was what they told you in the D.A.R.E. program at school. He was not eve n sure which one this was. What if it was that really horrible stuff? What was it: heroin maybe? He heard that stuff will really send you plummeting. Are they all as bad for you as heroin? He can not remember much about what they told him for some reason.

Roxas looked at the pipe, shrugged his shoulders, and mumbled."Why not?" He brought the pipe to his mouth and inhaled deeply.

That was only the beginning for Roxas.

Ok. How was it? Good? Bad? Puke worthy? I will never know if you don't review.

I would like to say sorry I have not updated in so long, but I have a lot to do along with school work.A lot of my weekends are even filled up, so my updates might be farrer inbetween. I would like to say that these characters do not belong to me and occasionally I will use quotes from the video game in my story (like Luxord). It has been awhile since I have played any of the kh games due to my parents, so I have been doing a lot of research and find things on them like quotes and stuff.

OH NO! Our poor Roxy just did meth! La GASP! Sorry guys but I've been reading a lot of Ellen Hopkins (WHO IS AMAZING!but i don't recomened her for the innocent or faint of heart.) and the ideas just kind of worked its way into this story. I will be puting these chapters in when I don't know what to write or want to pass time in my story.