Deadliest Warrior – Season H
by Metal Harbinger
Author's Note: "Deadliest Warrior" is the property of Spike TV, as for me, I'm just a loyal fan of the series who was left bummed out over its cancellation and at the same time is left pondering what could have been had they matched up fighters against different opponents and featured warriors never featured on the show.
This story will feature warriors from the show, as well as historical generals and squad battles with each side fighting it out to see who is the deadliest warrior?
I've seen various fics on this site featuring battles between fictional characters. That is something I may or may not do, but if it does happen their appearances will be few and far between.
Keep in mind though; this is an iffy idea floating around in my head, so I honestly don't know how long this fic will be. If the ideas keep coming to me I'll keep it going for a long while.
I wish to give a few shout outs to DeadAliveManiac, Scarecrow'sMainFan and deadliest fan for their correspondence and giving me ideas and feedback on ideas I've thrown at them to help me get this fic off the ground.
By all honesty, I'm not exactly the most accurate of history buffs, so I do welcome feedback and constructive criticism, but other than that, NO FLAMES! Failure to abide by that last order will result in me knocking on your front door with a halberd in hand!
For some last minute notes, I do not own Geoff Desmoulin, Dr. Armand Dorian, Richard "Mack" Machowicz, or Dave Baker. The weapons specialists I feature Hank and Jerry are my own original creations, I figured it would be safer to use original characters than the specialists featured on the show.
Also, whenever you see any text that is typed out like this in italics, that is intended to be the show's narrator speaking.
Okay I think that's everything and with that said let's get on with the story!
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Aztec Eagle Knight: The elite infantry soldiers who fought and killed in the name of their gods.
(Several eagle knights look on as their high priest sacrifices a prisoner.)
Vs.
Roman Gladiator: The proud, thrilling killer of Ancient Rome
(A gladiator delivers the final blow to his downed opponent and then roars to his adoring audience.)
WHO IS DEADLIEST?
To find out, we've assembled a team of world class fighters to test history's most lethal weapons. Using 21st century science, we'll see what happens when two warriors go toe to toe.
No rules. No safety. No mercy. It's a duel to the death to decide who is…THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!
Here in our elite fight club we have gathered doctors, medical scientists and weapons experts to test out the lethal arsenals wielded by each of our combatants to determine who would win a fight between two warriors who never met in a face to face duel:
Aztec Eagle Knight
Circa: 1500 A.D.
Height: 5' 6"
Weight: 140 lbs.
Armor:
Cuacalalatli Wooden Helmet
Ichcahuipilli Tunic
Leather Greaves
Chimalli Shield
Roman Gladiator
Circa: 100 A.D.
Height: 5' 8"
Weight: 185 lbs.
Armor:
Murmillo Helmet
Leather Belt
Lorica Manica
Galerus
Wooden Shield
"This is going to be an interesting matchup," Richard "Mack" Machowicz explained, "Today you have two warriors who fought for vastly different causes compared to most warriors.
"On one side, you have the Eagle Knight, whose main purpose was to capture enemies alive so they could be sacrificed to their gods and on the other; you have a Gladiator, who often fought to the death for entertainment."
"My money is on the gladiator," biomedical scientist Geoff Desmoulin explained, "They had an assortment of weapons crafted for the specific purpose of killing your enemies, nothing else, most of which here were made of hardened steel, ten times as deadly as the obsidian the eagle knights crafted into their weapons. The audacity with which they fought is still known to this day and my bet is that the Eagle Knight is going to be just another victim."
"I'm going to give the edge on this one to the eagle knight," Dr. Armand Dorian countered, "These men were highly-trained warriors who were good at what they did, whereas most gladiators were either slaves or criminals. I can see the gladiator being prepped for sacrifice as we speak."
Eagle warriors, or eagle knights, were a special class of infantry soldier in the Aztec army. Along with their Jaguar counterparts, they consisted of the bravest soldiers of noble birth.
"The 'Eagles' were soldiers of the sun," Mack explained, "Their life was one of constant battle and their primary purpose for this continual warfare was to take prisoners to be sacrificed by their gods.
At the age of 17, young Aztec men entered their formal military training. In order to achieve adult status, a boy had to capture his first prisoner.
To become an eagle knight, a warrior was expected to capture up to 20 enemies alive.
"It might not have always been their objective to kill their enemy on the battlefield, but they were still the elite warriors of their day," Mack finished.
The Eagle Knight brings a deadly assortment of weapons to today's battle:
Short Range: Tecpatl
Mid-Range: Maquahuitl
Long Range: Tlahhuitolli
Special Weapon: Tepoztopilli
But today, they will be going up against a ruthless adversary that shows no signs of backing down.
Gladiators were most often captured soldiers from rival armies or condemned criminals who were selected for their ferocity, strength and skill. In Ancient Rome they entertained the public with bloody battles to the death.
"Gladiators were scrappy individuals," Mack explained, "They were literally expected to die without asking for mercy or even crying out in pain. Very rarely was a loser allowed to leave alive. They had to fight courageously and win over the crowd's sympathy, most often; they became food for the lions.
To ensure the best spectacle possible, a gladiator was trained in the art of killing, using a wide range of lethal, crowd-pleasing weapons:
Short Range: Scissor
Mid-Range: Trident & Net
Long Range: Sling
Special Weapon: Sica
Both teams will start out up close and personal with their deadly short range weapons, going up first will be the eagle knight with his Tecpatl sacrificial knife.
"The tecpatl was often used for ceremonial purposes, but was still carried into battle as a sidearm," weapons maker Dave Baker explained, having recreated an intricate replica of the aforementioned weapon, "It consisted of a double-sided obsidian blade attached to either a stone or wooden handle. It was typically seven to nine inches overall in length and half a pound."
Here in the fight club, a makeshift altar has been set up and one of our weapons experts will carry out a mock ritual sacrifice to show the typical usage of the dagger. A ballistic gel torso will stand in for the exercise, possessing the same resistance as human flesh.
"Alright, Hank I want you to show us exactly how this is done," Geoff explained as Hank looked on with the dagger in hand, "Whenever you are ready!"
Hank nodded and made his way over to the platform and with a mighty grunt, plunged the blade into the torso's chest, slicing it open from its sternum down to its navel, shoving his hand inside and methodically reaching his hand beneath its ribcage and after a few tugs, ripped out the fake heart inside.
"There is no need for me to even put my gloves on for this one," Dr. Dorian chuckled, "You have performed primitive open heart surgery and in a way different from modern medicine. In a typical operation, we literally have to saw right through the sternum in order to get at the heart, but you literally reached underneath the ribcage to pull it out!"
"Heh, that's real cute there, but the weapon I'm about to use isn't about putting on some fancy production, it's all about killing your enemy!" Jerry spoke up, unimpressed with his arms crossed in front of him and shaking his head.
The Roman Gladiator answers with the Scissor.
"The Roman Scissor was a distinctive bladed weapon wielded by a class of gladiator known simply as 'the scissor,'" Dave said presenting the weapon, "Eighteen inches, five pounds of hardened steel. It's a crescent-shaped blade on the end of a metal tube worn over the forearm. There was a handle inside that allowed the user to maintain his grip during the heat of battle. It's a very versatile weapon, it can slash you, stab you, plus the tube itself could also double as a means of blocking your foe's attacks."
Jerry proudly showed off the scissor for all to see, earning a scoff from Hank.
"Okay Jerry, to demonstrate what the scissor can do, we have set up a four-hundred pound beef carcass," Geoff said motioning to the aforementioned carcass suspended from the ceiling nearby, "When I give the signal, I want you to show us what it can do."
"You got it," the weapons expert said taking his position in front of the carcass.
"Alright, high speed cameras have been set up. Jerry, are you ready?" Geoff called out.
"Born ready," Jerry shouted back.
"Alright, then on 3…2…1! Cut 'em up!"
With a mighty roar, Jerry shot his covered arm out and punched his way through the slab, getting his arm stuck. Yanking his arm hard, he managed to pull it out and then kept punching away until he had cut the meat in half.
"Fresh meat anyone?" Jerry asked proud of his work.
"Judging by what I see here, you likely wouldn't kill this man with the initial strike," Dr. Dorian said inspecting the cuts, "What would kill him though is the brutal ending you have. That blade is going to get lodged and is going to likely pull out the man's intestines along with it, especially with how you struggled to pull it out, that only contribute to the suffering right there. You keep that up; you would eventually dismember the man's upper torso."
"You might have more reach, but it's still a lot slower," Hank interjected, "While you're trying one slow swipe, I could be jumping you and filling you full of holes. The tecpatl might be small, but it's faster and twice as lethal!"
But what do our experts think?
"While it is faster and less likely to get stuck, the bottom line is the tecpatl is still a knife and lacks the reach of the scissor," Geoff explained.
"Indeed, while the eagle knight may be going up against a lightly-armored opponent, still he would have to get up close and personal and given some of the weapons the gladiator has, that could be next to impossible," Dr. Dorian added.
"Also, the tecpatl cannot slash. If it does, it breaks," Mack said chipping in his two cents.
"While it may be slower and more prone to get stuck, plus leaving the wearer with only one available hand, still the scissor does its job," Geoff replied.
"Indeed, the scissor was built for the purpose of combat, whereas the tecpatl was a largely ceremonial dagger that would most likely be used as an absolute last resort," Dr. Dorian explained.
"Well, I think it's safe to say we've all made our decision, edge: Scissor," Mack spoke.
"I'm definitely going with the scissor on this one," Geoff nodded.
"Same here," Dr. Dorian added.
In short range weapons, the gladiator's scissor takes the edge.
Coming up, both warriors break out their mid-range arsenal. An 'obsidian chainsaw' goes up against a three-barbed killer of the ocean.
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Now it is time for both warriors to break out their mid-range weapons, up first will be the eagle knight with the Maquahuitl sword club.
"The maquahuitl was a wooden oar-like weapon used in pre-Columbian Mesoamerica, one of high status in the Aztec army," Dave explained as he handed the replica over to Hank, "It had sharpened obsidian blades inserted into grooves along the sides. It was used like a sword, although its cutting action was more akin to a saw, could sever heads with little to no difficulty. The flat wooden sides could also be used to bludgeon an opponent into unconsciousness. It was four feet long and weighed three pounds."
"A deadly looking weapon indeed, one that makes me nervous just looking at it," Geoff explained before turning his attention to a nearby pedestal, where there was a hunk of ballistic gel shaped into the head of a horse, "There was at least one account of the maquahuitl beheading a horse and today we're going to test that theory out. Hank, will you do the honors?"
"With pleasure," Hank smiled walking over to the fake horse head.
"Whenever you are ready, show us how it's done!" Geoff shouted.
Taking a deep breath, Hank swung the maquahuitl at the fake horse head, cutting into it and breaking its spine. Taking another swing, he took another swing and cut further before rearing back and going even further, sawing the rest of his way through.
"My god, that was more like a chainsaw than a sword, once again the results are plain as day, kill," Dr. Dorian said picking up the severed ballistic gel head for all to see.
"Heh, that takes too freaking long. In the time it takes you to saw through Mr. Ed's head I could be running you through fifty times with my mid-range weapon," Jerry scoffed.
Hank smirked to his fellow weapons specialist and looked over to a foam torso outfitted with a Murmillo helmet. Walking over to it he swung the sword club downward, denting the helmet and then swinging it sideways to cleave the dummy's head clean off.
"Satisfied now?" Hank sarcastically chuckled.
Jerry harrumphed and made his way over to where the next mid-range weapon was located.
The gladiator responds with the trident and net combination.
"The trident was originally a fishing tool that was later used in the coliseum by a class of gladiator known as the 'retiarius.' It was six feet long and weighed four pounds, three barbed steel prongs on the end, which inflicted more damage as the weapon was pulled from the body," Dave explained before holding up the net, "The net was circular with lead weights around the edge and was attached to the gladiator's wrist by means of a rope. It was intended to entangle the opponent's limbs or torso, allowing the gladiator to follow up with a strike from the trident."
To simulate the damage that could be inflicted upon a human being, the team has set up a ballistic gel torso and has outfitted it with an Ichcahuipilli tunic worn by the eagle warriors into battle. The cotton breastplate was made from quilted cotton several fingers thick, then soaked in saltwater brine and dried, making it harder to be penetrated by the light projectiles Aztecs frequently encountered, while at the same time not being excessively heavy in the tropical Central American climate.
"Jerry, are you ready?" Geoff called out setting up the high speed camera.
"Hell yeah!" he shouted back.
"Alright, on 3…2…1, punch it!" Geoff ordered.
Jerry tossed the net and entangled his inanimate foe before stepping forward and thrusting the trident into chest, piercing the tunic like it was made of paper and pulling it out with pieces of the artificial heart inside stuck on the barbs before thrusting a little lower into the abdomen and coming out with bits of intestine, before making his final thrust into the torso's throat, severing its windpipe and spinal cord.
"Hope you got the point," Jerry said to his inanimate adversary, the floor beneath it covered in fake blood.
"With your first thrust you ripped up the man's heart, your second tore large parts of his intestines out and your last cut off his ability to breathe and severed the C4 column of his spine. These are all kills," Dr. Dorian reported.
Both weapons are definitely lethal, but where do our experts stand?
"Any weapon that can decapitate a horse that easily has to be tough, plus it's something totally different from any weapon we've ever seen on this show. My edge goes to the maquahuitl ," Geoff said.
"This is a weapon you have diversity with. You can slash with it like a sword and bonk your enemy over the head like a club, the maquahuitl all the way in my book," Mack answered.
"Even if you survive being slashed by it, pieces of obsidian are still going to get stuck in your body and if that gets into your bloodstream, it's a dire situation, edge maquahuitl," Dr. Dorian finished.
The eagle knight takes the edge in mid-range weapons with the maquahuitl.
Coming up, both sides will break out their long range arsenal.
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Now it is time for both sides to show their long range weapons. Up first will be the Roman gladiator with his simple, yet lethal sling.
"The sling is a very basic, but deadly weapon made from two leather cords, in some cases braided wool, and has a small leather pouch in the middle. It can fire lead bullets, stones or any other small projectiles found lying around," Dave explained.
"Aw how cute, you brought a few tiny rocks and your G-string along," Hank taunted, "This oughta' be interesting to watch."
Jerry ignored him and approached the line where three skulls were set up in front of him, loading a rock into the sling he swung it above his head and launched it at the first skull, shattering its jaw and knocking out a few teeth. Loading up another rock, he swung the sling a few times before launching it right into the center of the skull's forehead, leaving a noticeable crack. Readying his third rock, he launched it into the third skull's left eye.
"Alright, your first shot succeeded in breaking the jaw, not going to be a kill, but will hurt your enemy and definitely come back to haunt him later," Dr. Dorian explained before making his way over to the second skull, "This is a depressed skull fracture, not going to be an instant kill, but if left untreated anywhere between 6 to 10 hours, it will be a kill," Dr. Dorian said before making his way over to the third skull, "Now this would have taken out your opponent's eye. Could it be a kill? Depending upon the amount of force it could possibly sever the brain stem, a possible kill."
"Granted, this is just bare bones we're talking about here," Geoff said wheeling forth a ballistic gel bust outfitted with a Cuacalalatli wooden helmet worn by eagle warriors, "Let's see how it works out against simulated flesh."
Undaunted by the results of the previous test, Jerry stepped up loaded a rock into his sling and spun it around a few times before launching it right into the dummy's nose with a sickening 'thwack.'
Dr. Dorian walked over and removed the wooden helmet to inspect the damage, "With this last strike you managed to hit the nose. The softest part of the skull is behind the nose and this was hard enough to cause a fracture because you are striking at the bottom of the brain, this would be a kill."
"Just remember that you have to swing that around before you're able to release the rock. In that amount of time, I could be running up and slicing your head off with the maquahutil," Hank said, "Not only that, but would you be able to hit me from a farther away range? My next weapon can do just that!"
"The Tlahhuitolli bow was a common sight in combat against the Aztecs," Dave explained, "The bow was 5 feet long and the arrows, or 'yaomime,' were pointed with flint, bone or obsidian. It is believed the arrows could fly 450 feet or more."
Hank walked over to the indoor firing range carrying six arrows in a quiver called a 'mixiquipilli,' where a gel torso dressed like a gladiator has been set up.
"Alright Hank, you've been given six arrows, I want you to fire two shots at the head, two at the body and two at the shield. You may fire when ready," Geoff explained.
With a nod Hank took aim and fired his first arrow towards the torso's helmeted head, the arrow bouncing harmlessly off its bronze surface. Undeterred by the failed attempt, he loaded the next arrow and fired, the arrow traveling right through one of the slits which the gladiator used to see out of and eliciting a roar of awe from everybody else in attendance.
"Holy sh-t," Geoff and Mack cried in unison.
Smirking with pride, the archer loaded his next arrow and fired a round dead center in the torso's heart before going for the next and catching it a little lower. Next it was time for shield and Hank fired both arrows in succession, both of them finding their mark in the wooden shield.
"Oh my god, this has to be some of the deadliest shooting I've ever seen with a bow and arrow," Geoff said walking over to the torso and carefully removing the Murmillo helmet, revealing the arrow traveled through the right eye and was protruding from the back of the fake skull.
"You have just severed the brain stem, instant kill," Dr. Dorian said before traveling lower and pulling out the two arrows from the torso's upper body, "Your first shot penetrated the heart, instant kill; your second cut the small intestines in half, instant kill."
Geoff then walked over to remove the shield, "Both of your arrows stick through to the other side, but not anywhere near to injure the user's hand underneath."
"To me it's a no brainer as to which weapon takes the edge in this category, Tlahhuitolli all the way," Geoff chimed.
"I agree, the sling requires a certain distance for it to be effective and not only that, you need ample space for the wind up, with the Tlahhuitolli you can fire it from any distance," Dr. Dorian answered.
"This is an obvious choice, greater range, superior accuracy, faster rate of fire and greater lethality, edge Tlahhuitolli," Mack finished.
For long range weapons, the eagle knight takes the edge with the Tlahhuitolli bow.
Coming up, both sides break out their special weapons and then after that, we finally have a battle between two fearsome warriors to determine who is 'The Deadliest Warrior?'
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And now the time has come for both sides to unveil their special weapons.
"The tepoztopilli was a common frontline weapon in the Aztec military," Dave said displaying the lengthy weapon, "It was a pole arm that could sometimes measure more than seven feet tall and had a broad wooden head about a foot wide made of smaller obsidian blades. It's good for either slashing or thrusting, tough enough to pierce Spanish armor."
"Heh, looks like nothing but a giant toothpick to me," Jerry scoffed.
"Alright Hank, we've set up a three-hundred pound piece of beef filled with animal blood and entrails," Geoff said leading him over to the suspended slab, "I think you know what to do from here."
Hank nodded, taking his position in front of the waiting slab and getting into a battle ready stance.
"Hank, are you ready?" Geoff called out.
"Yeah!" the specialist shouted back.
"On 3…2…1…serve it up!" Geoff shouted.
Hank launched himself towards the slab, driving the spear through with a wet 'thuk' that tore a large hole into his target, yet it became stuck and he struggled to pull it out, ripping away some of the obsidian blades in the process. He went for another stab and went even further, pulling out a few entrails before going for the final thrust and leaving the tepoztopilli hanging out.
"Well you managed to get this spear all the way through," Dr. Dorian said closely examining the hole on the opposite end, "and you managed to pull out some entrails along the way," he said motioning to the innards littering the floor beneath, "all of which would have been definite kills."
"I'm impressed by what I saw, but at the same time I'm a little concerned," Geoff said walking over and pulling the tepoztopilli out of the slab, ripping off more obsidian shards, "This weapon can kill, but at the same time it appears that it can become easily lodged within its target. If you're fighting a battle against multiple opponents, this right here could leave your man open to all sorts of attacks. If he wanted to survive he would have to abandon the weapon and go for his sidearm, another thing you don't always want to have to do in a battle."
"That plus it seems this weapon can break a little too easily if too much force is applied," Mack said closely examining the shaft and noticing the cracks, "If this becomes stuck in an opponent, you've lost a weapon."
"I won't lie, my special weapon might not be as long as that toothpick there, but it is a lot faster, has more surgical precision behind it, and is less likely to get stuck," Jerry spoke up.
"The sica was a short sword seen as a weapon associated with criminals, but was later adopted into gladiatorial bouts, used by a class of gladiator known as the 'Thraex.' Early sicas had a sharply-curved, single-sided blade, but later designs would have a straight, double-edged blade, its upper third bent backwards at a 45 degree angle. It was 30 inches long and weighed 2.5 pounds," Dave said before handing the sica to Jerry, who then took a few practice swings with it.
"The angled blade was designed to reach around the shield of the gladiator's opponent. With a tip that pointed up, it would often catch onto the bottom of the opponent's helmet, allowing the user to force the blade upwards through the jaw and into the brain."
"Then show us how it's done," Geoff said motioning towards a ballistic gel torso outfitted in Aztec armor and holding a chimalli in one hand.
"He wouldn't even stand a chance. While he's over there doing calisthenics I could be impaling him with the tepoztopilli," Hank scoffed to Mack and Dr. Dorian.
"Jerry, are you ready?" Geoff called out with the high speed camera ready.
"Yeah!" he screamed.
"On 3…2…1…hack 'em up!" Geoff shouted.
Jerry stepped forward and swiped the blade so it got behind the chimalli and sliced into the arm holding it, coming centimeters away from severing the gel limb. Wasting no time he punched it through the tunic and ripped the blade out, swinging it upward and slicing through his target's neck before bringing the blade down and splintering the wooden helmet.
"Now I see why this sword was so greatly feared," Dr. Dorian said lowering the chimalli to inspect the damage, "With your first strike you're cutting through skin and muscle tissue all the way down to the bone. You don't stop the bleeding that will be a kill," he said before pulling shredded fragments of the tunic aside, "Here you've struck the aorta, another instant kill," he said before moving his hands up, "and here, oh my god you've turned this guy into a human Pez dispenser, the damage speaks for itself."
"With the blow to the helmet I registered 15 P.S.I." Geoff reported removing the now splintered helmet, "That's not enough to kill, but judging by your movements; you've disoriented this man and left him wide open."
"That little toy of yours is only two and a half feet long, the tepoztopilli is seven feet of pure cutting power, there's no way in hell I'd ever allow you to get that close to me," Hank said eying up the damage, "You'd be stuck like a pig before you knew it."
Both weapons appear to inflict massive amounts of trauma upon their targets, but our experts remain divided.
"The tepoztopilli is seven feet of pure cutting madness. I honestly don't think there is going to be any way a gladiator could get close enough with any of his weapons," Dr. Dorian said watching the slow motion footage of Hank's assault upon the slab of beef, "Not only that, you're doing twice as much damage when pulling the spear out and the gladiator isn't armored in enough places to protect himself. He's basically got one huge target painted on his chest."
"I have to disagree with you on this one Doc, while it can no doubt kill a man, the tepoztopilli looks to be pretty cumbersome if your opponent is allowed to get right up in your face like that. Not only that, we've seen how difficult it can be to pull out when you've got it stuck too deeply into an enemy, you'd be wasting precious seconds trying to pull it out. What also worries me is that it appears to brittle and can break very easily if too much force is applied," Geoff explained before looking over to the sica, "The sica on the other hand doesn't have that issue."
The crucial tie-breaker came down to Mack.
"I have to go with the sica on this one. It can go around shields and can easily pierce any armor the eagle knight has."
For special weapons, the gladiator takes the edge with the sica.
Coming up, our panelists gauge the X-factors of each warrior and then after that, we finally have our battle to determine who is THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR!
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And now Mack will gauge the X-factors of each warrior.
"For training we gave the eagle knight an 81 to the gladiator's 71. Granted the eagle knight only had to catch a certain amount of people to attain his ranking, but the gladiators were predominantly slaves or criminals."
"For ferocity, we give both men a 90 even. Gladiators had to be scrappy and fought for their survival, whereas the eagle knight fought for his gods and even though they didn't always fight to kill their enemies, they could still be downright brutal when the time called for it."
"For physicality, we give the gladiator the edge with a 94 to the eagle knight's 82. While the eagle has less energy to give with some of his weapons, the gladiator was forced to fight. Saying no was an option that would have had him fed to the lions; the eagle knight on the other hand had the option of retreating when things got hairy."
"For endurance this was a very close call. We gave the gladiator a 93 because he had to fight through pain and injuries, plus he fought against enemies who were oftentimes better equipped than him and even against wild animals. The eagle knight on the other hand often fought in groups and would have backup on hand if something went wrong, so we rated him slightly lower with an 85."
"Lastly, there's killer instinct. This was quite a gap where the gladiator got a 90 and the eagle knight got a 75. Again given his conditions, the gladiator had to be brutal and was only allowed to spare his opponent if they had won over the crowd's sympathy, whereas the eagle knight didn't always kill on the battlefield, he would take prisoners."
Our scientists and weapons experts are done testing the results and the time has come to decide who will be the victor. To ensure the battle won't be decided by a single lucky blow, the battle will be simulated one thousand times in a duel to the death.
Who will a battle between two very different styles?
Strength and Stamina
(A gladiator is shown bashing an opponent hard with his shield before gutting him with the scissors.)
Speed and Agility
(An eagle knight performs a graceful flip off a nearby tree to tackle his opponent and stab them with the tecpat.)
Steel
(A gladiator uses his sica to work his way around his opponent's shield and slash them across the chest.)
Obsidian
(An eagle warrior uses his maquahuitl to slice into a stumbling opponent while another runs one through with his tepoztopilli.)
Killing for entertainment
(A gladiator stands tall over his fallen opponent with his trident in hand ready to deliver the final strike, waiting for the 'thumbs down' gesture from the emperor.)
Killing for the gods
(An Aztec high priest is shown raising the still beating heart of a fresh sacrifice into the air as the masses cheer below.)
"In the end there can be only one. Let's find out," Mack said.
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The eagle knight walks alone through the sweltering Central American rainforest, looking for his next target. Thus far there had been no luck, but he wasn't going to let that deter him and he continued forth until he reached an open clearing, coming to a halt as he suddenly noticed a strange light-skinned figure standing on the hill before him, clad in very little armor and wearing a strange helmet with a wooden shield in hand.
On the opposite end the Roman gladiator had recently escaped from his captors and now suddenly found himself in a strange new land. Standing before him was one of the apparent inhabitants, a smaller man who held a shield in on hand lined with eagle feathers and wearing a strange costume that almost made him look like an eagle. Whoever he was, he was armed for battle and no doubt wouldn't let him pass without a fight.
With a mighty roar the gladiator raises his trident and makes his advance.
The newcomer is a hostile and looking for a fight. Reaching for an arrow in his quiver, the eagle warrior pulls out his Tlahhuitolli bow and loads the arrow. Taking aim he fires the arrow into the air and there is a loud 'thunk' as the arrow strikes his opponent's shield, yet the strange man continues forth. Quickly pulling out another arrow, he loads it and fires, the arrow sailing past the gladiator's head and landing in the dirt behind him. Still, the mystery man continued forth and the eagle warrior fires a third arrow, which finally catches him in the side of his stomach.
Grunting in pain, the gladiator stuck his trident in the ground next to him and with a mighty yank rips the arrow out of his side and tosses it to the ground, much to the eagle warrior's surprise. Pulling out his sling the gladiator swung it around and launched a rock at his opponent, which pinged harmlessly off of his chimalli.
The eagle knight could see that his opponent would be no pushover and needed to get enough distance between them before he could contemplate a new plan of attack. Loading another arrow into his bow he fired, but his hasty movements caused his shot to go wide as the gladiator launched another rock which flew harmlessly past the retreating warrior.
There was no way the gladiator would allow someone who had spilled his blood to escape without a little payback. Retrieving his trident he chased the weird little man further into the rainforest, the eagle warrior leaping gracefully over a fallen tree trunk while he was forced to run around it.
Having created enough space, the eagle warrior eventually withdrew his tepoztopilli and used a tree branch to create some more space between himself and the gladiator, thrusting through to ward off the man's advance. The gladiator would respond with his trident and both weapons became entangled, a struggle ensuing between both men which the bigger man would win, kicking his opponent to the ground and stepping on his spear, breaking it in half.
With one of his weapons lost the eagle warrior attempted to retreat, only to find himself falling to the ground again as the gladiator tossed his net, tripping and ensnaring his prey. With his opponent at his mercy, he attempted to stab the three-pronged weapon downward into the eagle warrior's head, but the Aztec quickly rolled aside and out of desperation, reached into his holster where he kept his trusty tecpatl. Waiting for his enemy to attempt another strike, he rolled aside and sliced into the gladiator's exposed calf.
His opponent temporarily subdued, the eagle warrior kicked the net off and scampered over to a nearby rock, where he had hidden his maquahuitl and reclaimed his chimalli.
Forcing himself back to his feet the gladiator let out a frustrated roar and began to circle his opponent, his only thought being to kill the man and take his head as a prize.
Both men eyed each other cautiously as they circled each other for several tense seconds, their shields in one hand and respective mid-range weapons in the other. The enraged gladiator was first to act, thrusting his trident outward, the barbs becoming embedded in the wooden chimalli, the eagle warrior bringing his maquahuitl down and slicing through the trident's wooden shaft.
Undaunted, the gladiator reached for his sica and charged towards his opponent, both men's shields clashing, but the Roman used his superior strength and size to back the Aztec into a nearby tree and went to slash with his sword, but the smaller man moved his head at the last second and the blade became embedded in his wooden helmet, but not far enough to cut into his skull. Out of desperation the eagle knight shot his sword club out and managed to rake it across his opponent's side before swinging it upwards and knocking the man's fish-like helmet off with a loud 'dong.'
The gladiator fell backwards as the obsidian cut into his exposed flesh and his head still ringing from the follow up swing, hit hard enough his jaw had been cracked. He had experienced worse in his previous battles and wasn't going to let some scratch slow him down and cracked his neck back into place.
The eagle knight threw his now splintered helmet off and went for another overhead swing with his maquahuitl, only to meet the gladiator's wooden shield, his opponent slicing into his side with the sica in an area left unguarded by his tunic, again finding himself knocked to the ground after taking a hard backhanded shot from his opponent's shield.
Filled with the bravado, the gladiator tossed his shield aside and slipped his scissor on, charging forward as the bloodied eagle struggled back to his feet. His Aztec adversary saw him coming and attempted another strike with his maquahuitl, but he brought his scissor up to deflect the blow, breaking off several obsidian shards in the process and beginning to slash the eagle across his stomach through the tunic, wanting to make it slow and painful so he could savor the moment as he looked into the injured man's dark eyes.
Knowing his time would be up if he didn't act fast, the eagle warrior shot his foot out and kicked the gladiator in his already injured calf, forcing him backward.
His kill again having slipped through his fingers, the gladiator yet again pushed himself back to his feet just as the Aztec was reaching down for his strange sword club and he shot his scissor outward, only for his opponent to move out of the way at the last second, the crescent-shaped blade driving into the tree trunk and becoming stuck.
With his opponent stuck and hampered by his injuries, the eagle knight took advantage and swung his maquahuitl outward, striking the gladiator in his lower back with the blunt side and hearing some of his bones break. Turning the blade sideways he again raked it along the man's back at a diagonal angle, tearing deep into his flesh and spilling his blood out in a gruesome display. Weakened by the rapid blood loss the gladiator passed out and collapsed to the ground.
His opponent was unconscious, but still alive. He had been a worthy adversary and would be a worthwhile sacrifice to the gods.
Withdrawing his bloodstained tecpatl the eagle warrior knelt over his fallen opponent and drove the obsidian blade into the man's still warm chest, cutting through methodically and reaching in he pulled out the man's still beating heart, raising it high above his head and roaring to the heavens in victory.
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Winner: Aztec Eagle Knight
Aztec Eagle Knight:
Tecpatl: 32
Maquahuitl: 319
Tlahhuitolli: 106
Tepoztopill: 210
Total: 667
Roman Gladiator:
Scissor: 50
Trident & Net: 166
Sling: 1
Sica: 116
Total: 333
In a battle of two comparatively primitive warriors, the Aztec eagle knight proved to be the deadlier warrior, scoring a relatively lopsided victory with 3 of his 4 weapons scoring kills in the triple digits, his maquahuitl being the deadliest followed closely by the tepoztopilli. The gladiator's deadliest weapon proved to be his trident and net combination.
"I think the eagle warrior's training and combative tactics played a large part in his victory," Geoff explained, "Despite his access to steel and the fact that he fought nearly every day for the sake of his life, the gladiator was a coliseum fighter used to straightforward battles, whereas the eagle warrior often fought with guerilla-style tactics as part of a group. It was that, plus the gladiator wore little to no armor in the most important places, leaving him wide open to plenty of vulnerable attacks.
(The eagle knight is shown presenting the defeated gladiator's heart to a high priest, his fallen foe's sica now strapped to his side, a trophy of his conquest.)
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Next time on Deadliest Warrior: It's a battle of the two heavily-armored killing machines that followed strict codes of conduct.
Samurai: The disciplined warrior class of Feudal Japan known for their skill in Bushido and Kendo.
Vs.
Knight: Fully armored sword masters of Medieval Europe who fought in the name of God for their countries.
Who will be…THE DEADLIEST WARRIOR?
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Author's Note: And so concludes my first "episode" of "Deadliest Warrior – Season H" and I hope you all enjoyed it.
Honestly, there might be some parts that are historically inaccurate and if that turns out to be the case I apologize to all the hardcore history nuts out there. I do accept constructive criticism and I know there are some of you out there who may not agree with the end results of my fights; mostly this is just me going by my gut when I compare the weapons and tactics of both sides.
At this point I have ideas for most of the warriors whom I wish to feature in this story and aside from the "Knight vs. Samurai" fight I do have a few definite ideas planned after this bout, but I do welcome suggestions.
Regarding my original characters who act as the weapons specialists, Hank is physically inspired by Pitfall Harry Jr. from "Pitfall: The Mayan Adventure" and Jerry is inspired by Super Joe from Capcom's "Commando" run and gun, vertically scrolling shooter.
Until then all you can do is read and review! This is Metal Harbinger saying SPREAD THE SICKNESS, ONE MIND AT A TIME! \m/