Disclaimer: I don't own Narnia or any characters you may recognize from the books or the movies, I wish I did but I don't... I also don't own the Narnian Calendar. It belongs to Elecktrum who was kind enough to let me borrow it for my story. Her own stories are awesome and you should go read them too.
Summary: Two Kings... Five Raccoon kits... Three hours... What could possibly go wrong?
A/N: Pure fluff piece requested/suggested by Lady Firewing. Hope you enjoy it! This is part of my A Light in the Darkness universe and is a sequel to my oneshots Acceptance and How Hard Could It Be? but can be read as a standalone.
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4 Greenroof 1004
I cautiously peeked into the room...the parlor was empty of course, but I could hear my brother's low voice coming from the bedroom. I took a breath, and then rapped on the doorframe before stepping into the bedroom. "You must be looking for Edmund."
Edmund twisted around from where he was sitting cross-legged on the end of the bed to look from me to Katerina Alambiel, "Now, what makes you think that he's not looking for you, Kat?"
She smiled from where she was leaning against nearly a dozen pillows, "Because I already fussed at him for listening to his guilt complex earlier this morn."
I made a face at her and she smiled a little wider. Yes, she had summoned me to come see her that morn with the express purpose of telling me to quit feeling guilty over what happened to her since it had been completely out of my control otherwise she was going to get out of bed and thrash me up and down the length of the training yard...I promised to stop blaming myself. I looked back at Edmund and knew he probably wasn't going to be very happy with what I had to say. "What is it, Peter?"
"You need to come with me."
Edmund immediately looked suspicious, "Why?"
"Because you and I are babysitting."
"What? Who?"
My little brother was not pleased...just wait until he found out who we were babysitting... I ran my hand through my hair, stalling just a little...until Kat decided to get involved, "Spit it out, Peter, before we die of suspense."
I really wished she wasn't on bed rest because then she could help with the entire babysitting episode instead of just smirking as she watched Edmund cross his arms and give me a pointed glare, "Yes, Peter, spit it out."
I cleared my throat, "Umm, we're babysitting Lady Shapata's kits."
"What?!" Oh he was taking this well. Kat looked far too happy as Edmund continued, "Peter! Have you forgotten what happened the last time we watched Atuki? And, you volunteered us to watch all...all..."
Edmund trailed off until Kat cheerfully helped him out, "Five."
I glared at her. She was not helping the situation. She grinned as Edmund jumped off her bed and picked up where he had left off, "Yes, five. All five kits. Have you lost your mind? We have difficulty just watching Atuki. What makes you think we'll have any more success watching Atuki and his siblings?"
I jumped in once Edmund stopped to take a breath, "It's not going to be that bad, Ed. They're a little older and Lady Shapata assured me that her four elder kits are not nearly as much trouble as Atuki. Between the two of us, it will be easy. What could possibly go wrong?"
Kat gave a little choked sound then muttered, "Murphy." I ignored her.
Edmund looked at her then he looked at me, "How long do we have to watch them?"
I tried not to grin, knowing he had resigned himself to the task. "Only for three hours."
He sighed, "Oh, all right, let's get this over with."
Kat grinned, "I want to hear how this turns out."
I opened my mouth to answer only to be cut off as Alithia appeared in the doorway, "You don't get to hear how anything turns out, Katerina Alambiel, until your ribs are healed." She ignored the noise of protest Kat made and fixed me with a stern glare, "Your majesties, I expect you to keep those kits away from the healers' wing and out of my storeroom unlike the last time you watched Atuki. And, you are not to report back to Katerina Alambiel until she can laugh without further damaging her ribs and that won't be for some time."
I inclined my head and snagged Edmund by the sleeve as we backed out of the head healer's way, "Don't worry, Alithia, we'll make sure there are no repeats of previous incidents with Atuki."
Kat ignored Alithia's warning look as she piped up in a singsong voice, "Murphy's going to get you."
I rolled my eyes in response and pulled the bedroom door shut as Alithia scolded Kat. Edmund glared at me, "If anything goes wrong, I blame you."
I tried not to snicker as I held my hands up, "Nothing's going to go wrong. Now, come on, let's go collect the kits."
Lady Shapata looked rather frazzled when we showed up to collect her kits, enough so that I saw Edmund soften his stance as he politely reassured her that it was no trouble at all for us to watch her children. The kits were surprisingly quiet as we took them with us to our quarters, which caused Edmund to give them a skeptical glance while I was cautiously optimistic that this was an indication of how the next three hours would go. Our valets weren't around...shockingly...and as soon as we set the Raccoons down, they all lined up from eldest to youngest on the settee. Atuki sat up and waved at us, "Morn! Duht!"
Edmund and I exchanged a glance, but before we could say anything, the eldest kit, Tiko, shook his fist at Atuki. "Not morn, Atuki. And, no duht!"
One of their sisters, Rikki I think, giggled then waved prettily at us, "A'noon, 'ing Pet, 'ing Emu."
I nearly choked in my desperate attempt to avoid laughing at the look on my little brother's face when Atuki whispered, "'Ing Emu?"
Then all five kits hummed, "'Ing Emu!"
Edmund glared at me like this was somehow my fault and hissed, "Atuki had my name right the last time."
All five Raccoon kits bounced in their spots on the settee as they started chanting, "'Ing Emu! 'Ing Emu! 'Ing Emu! 'Ing Emu!"
I smirked, "Not anymore, good my brother." Edmund growled. Apparently, he did not appreciate being called a giant non-flying bird. Kat was going to love hearing about Atuki and his siblings' new name for Ed.
One hour and forty shiny objects later, Tiko, Ikki, and Suki were crawling up and down my back as they took turns watching me play chess with Edmund while Rikki and Atuki napped inside my crown. Edmund wasn't speaking to me. I looked at him, "You know, this hasn't been nearly as bad as the last time. Even Atuki is behaving himself."
Edmund grunted as he moved his knight to capture my bishop. I caught Suki...or was it Ikki...right before she overbalanced and fell off my shoulder. She giggled as I set her down on the floor and wandered over to peer inside my crown at her sleeping siblings. I was still clinging to the faint hope that at some point in the next two hours, all five kits would be asleep.
A sudden squawk came from my crown, I jerked around in time to see Suki and Ikki had pounced on top of Rikki and Atuki...Tiko was still clinging to the back of my shirt. The four Raccoon kits tussled with each other, squawking with Atuki shouting "Duht!" every chance he got. Tiko clambered down my arm as I reached to separate Atuki and Suki and launched himself at both younger kits. All three of them rolled away before I could catch them. Edmund gave a shout as the three kits collided with Ikki and Rikki then all five of them rolled across the chessboard sending chess pieces flying.
"Is everything all right, your majesties?"
Edmund and I exchanged a look of alarm before we spun around hissing, "Shut the door!" The poor Satyr who had investigated the noise stepped back in surprise but he didn't get the door closed in time. With delighted shouts, all five Raccoon kits scurried through the crack and past the bewildered Satyr. I scrambled to my feet as Edmund hissed a nasty curse under his breath then snapped, "Peter, I blame you."
Of course, he did. I didn't bother to reply as I followed him in rushing by the poor guard who had unintentionally caused the situation. The five Raccoon kits were gathered in a little knot at the end of the hall and I hoped the little rascals would stay still long enough for us to catch them. Atuki looked up and shouted "Duht! We fast, ha!" And then he and one of his sisters took off in one direction while Tiko and the other two sisters raced in the other direction.
Edmund growled and jabbed a finger in my direction then at where Atuki and his sister had disappeared, "You go get that little bugger. I'll get the others." I almost laughed but I had a feeling Ed might strangle me if I did such a thing instead I set out to catch my assigned kits.
Atuki liked to giggle. His sister, Rikki, liked to giggle too. And, they both liked to poke their heads around corners and giggle, "We fast, 'ing Pet! No catch, ha!" I jogged down the corridor following the sound of the giggles and occasional "Duht!" in the rather vain hope that Atuki and Rikki would get tired of playing this game sooner than later. I hoped Edmund was faring better than I was...
Several of our guards were now helping me chase down the two escapees, including the extremely contrite Satyr who had unleashed them on the Cair at large. The problem being that the kits had been loose in the Cair for over an hour and we hadn't seen one tiny ringed tail or heard a single giggle and/or "Duht!" for over fifteen minutes. I paused in my search behind another tapestry as a Red Panda approached me, "Did you find any sign of them, Shea?"
Shea shook his head, "No, your majesty, but I did find your brother. He has also lost all track of where the other three kits have gone."
I ran my hand through my hair. Those little rascals could be anywhere! Sweet Aslan, what were we going to tell Lady Shapata? Not to mention, Kat and the girls would never let us live this whole thing down. "Shea, please go back and inform my brother that I'll meet him in the solarium a level below us. We can regroup from there."
"Yes, your majesty."
I sighed as the remaining guards and I resumed searching the rest of the floor. So, Kat just might have been on to something when she predicted Murphy would get us. Where could those little rascals be?
Edmund and the guards helping him caught up with us just outside of the designated solarium. We were near one of the conservatories as well and I knew for a fact that Susan and Lucy were taking tea in it, so I motioned for Edmund to keep his voice down as we conferred. "Anything?"
Ed shook his head, "No. It's like those little buggers vanished." He paused then continued in an even softer whisper, "Peter, what if they got outside?"
I shuddered to even imagine what kind of trouble those kits would get into if they made it outside the Cair without any sort of supervision. "They can't have gotten that far yet. They've probably holed up somewhere by now with whatever shiny things they could find."
Edmund gave me an exasperated look, "Peter, the conservatory is just there and it's only a short flight of stairs from the conservatory to one of the gardens. And, you know the girls have probably propped the door open. We're going to have to check."
I sighed again and ran my hand through my hair. He was right. Of the two of us, Edmund was the sneaky one so I hoped he had a good plan for checking the conservatory without telling the girls about losing the kits. "So, do you-"
I cut myself off as screams suddenly sounded from the conservatory. All I could think was the Raccoon kits had made their presence known. I turned and ran toward the conservatory with Edmund on my heels. We burst into the room only to freeze at the sight before us. The girls were there with a few of their ladies-in-waiting. All eyes were focused on the scene playing out in the middle of the room.
A giant snake was curled not even a foot from Lucy, and the only reason it hadn't bitten her was because of the antics of the five Raccoon kits. Four of the kits were throwing sticks, rocks, and every shiny object they had amassed at the snake, while Rikki gave an outraged squawk as she bit and scratched at the snake whenever she wasn't hitting it just above the eyes with...my personal seal. The snake twisted in an attempt to bite Rikki and she jumped off, scrambling up to take her place among her siblings and continuing throwing various items at the snake. The snake hissed and I could see its fangs as it wheeled away from the Raccoon kits and set its sights on Lucy again. Fortunately, a Mongoose by the name of Tavi attacked the snake before it could strike. A short scuffle later, the snake was most definitely dead...as Atuki and Rikki confirmed when they bounced on its head for good measure, I think, before our guards shooed them away so they could dispose of the snake.
No one was certain where the snake came from, but since one of Lucy's ladies-in-waiting had propped the door to the garden open, we were theorizing that's how it got into the conservatory. I couldn't believe it, but I thanked Aslan that the kits had escaped because otherwise the snake probably would have bitten Lucy. Lady Shapata was expecting her children back in forty-five minutes, so Ed and I decided to cut our losses and take tea with the girls after we firmly shut the door leading to the garden. After a while, Ed looked at me, "You know we cannot tell Kat anything that happened, right?"
"Yes."
"And, this was all your fault."
I shook my head, "I did not open the door for them to escape."
"No, you volunteered us to watch the little buggers." Edmund made that sound like the worst crime he had ever witnessed. Little brothers.
I shrugged as Lucy handed me a cup of tea. Atuki giggled, "We save 'en Ce and 'en San! Duht!"
Tiko looked up from where he had been running his forepaws along the edges of a biscuit, "Atuki! No duht!"
Rikki giggled from where she was sitting on Lucy's lap, as did Suki and Ikki who were safely ensconced on Susan's lap. Atuki ignored his brother and instead looked at Edmund who eyed the kit warily. "You see, 'ing Emu?"
He sighed, "Yes, Atuki, I saw you save the Queens."
Lucy clapped her hand over her mouth while Susan ducked her head in an attempt to hide her own grin. "Emu?"
I grinned while Ed just groaned, "Rikki dubbed me that for some reason and now they're all calling me it. Hey!" Atuki giggled then pelted Edmund with another biscuit as the girls struggled to contain their laughter.
"Atuki!"
All five kits straightened before Atuki dropped into a low crouch and whined, "Duht."
Lady Shapata was instantly surrounded by her children all chattering about what they had done and how they had saved the queens and escaped from the kings until she silenced them with a hiss. She gave us an apologetic look, "I'm sorry my children have been causing difficulty this afternoon, your majesties."
Lucy piped up before either Edmund or I could say anything, "Oh, don't worry about it, Lady Shapata. We know our brothers didn't keep nearly as close an eye on them as they should have. Besides, they have been absolute sweethearts since they joined us in here." Wait a minute, how was this our fault? Lucy blushed as she realized her comment hadn't been quite as flattering to us as she might have meant.
Lady Shapata herded her children out of the conservatory and I doubted she would ever leave them to Ed and mine's supervision again. Edmund scowled at me, "Never again, Pet."
I tossed a biscuit at him, "Whatever you say, Emu." We stared at each other in silence for a moment and then Edmund snorted. Lucy and Susan both shook their heads at us as Edmund and I just started laughing. He was right though, I was never again going to volunteer us to watch all five Raccoon kits again. I might volunteer Edmund to watch Atuki and Rikki though.
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A/N: Please Read and Review! Right, so the long-awaited return of Atuki...with his brother and sisters. This is my third attempt at writing Peter and he's not nearly as snarky as Edmund, so I'm not sure how well his more subtle humor came across. Thanks to Lady Firewing for the idea of this oneshot and the names of Atuki's siblings. Leave a review and let me know what y'all thought about this one and if you have any requests for other stories.