Mistaken Identity

Quinn Fabray

Theories and people say that when you're about to die, those last seconds, you see your entire life flashing before your eyes. Every single memorabe moments that you've ever had. Sort of like a reminder of what you've gone through, right? Or maybe just something to make you remember that you've lived. Well.. it's not true.

I was standing there, in the kitchen, centre of the room. No one was home but me. Everything was completely quiet, not even Douglas, my neighbours dog, was outside in his little garden, barking like he usually did. Nothing but silence. That kind of silence that creeps up on you.. it really was too quiet.

I didn't quite know why.. but I was tired. Tired of living. Maybe I was just done? I had lived. I had got to travel the world with my best friends. I had a succesfull career, and I was literally on the top of the world. I had felt love, been loved.. but maybe that was the problem. I wasn't loved by the one I wanted. But that hardly ever happens though.. right?

I was with Puck. He was a kind man, I mean, there wasn't really anything wrong with him. He was actually the man anyone could ever dream about.. if you skip his High School career, wich was kind of bad at first. But now.. he had a good job, he was romantic, and he was not hard on the eyes. But there was just one problem with it all.. he wasn't Rachel.

Rachel Berry. I had been in love with her since the first year at McKinley. And now I was 29, and she was happy in New York, living with Finn, being on broadway. They were obviously one of those couples who were meant to end up together, even though many people disagreed.. or maybe there wasn't that many. Maybe it was just me.

Finn was lucky to have a woman like her to call wife. I couldn't believe they actually got married at the age of 20. I thought that they were too young. But they were happy with each other, so I suppose it was okay after all.

Yet I couldn't get over the fact that she was with him, and I was with Puck, and that her and I wasn't together.

I had never told anyone about it.. I had kept it all to myself, all this time.

And maybe that also caused the reason, why I was so tired? Tired of keeping this anger inside of me. Anger that she wasn't mine.. and that I was too afraid to tell her when I had the chance.

But back on track. Life flashing before your eyes? All lies.

As I heard the knife hit the floor, and saw the red fluid drain out of my body, I didn't see my life.. not even a little part of my childhood. All I saw was Rachel.

Her and me, together. We sat on a park bench. It was probably summer, because everything was green and the sun was shining. We were laughing. She had put her legs over mine. She was wearing a light green dress, and she had her hair in a messy bun, with some flowers here and there. She was absolutely stunning. And she was smiling at me, with that amazing smile that I had always adored so much. Her smile literally made everything around her shine. And those eyes, looking into mine.. those brown, beautiful eyes. It was nothing but perefct.

What actually was just a few seconds, seemed to be long minutes. Hours. Together with Rachel..

So the theories.. they're wrong. You see the life you want. The person you love, and wants to spend the rest of your life with. The little stuff you've always dreamed of having..

But who'll know? I'd be gone in just a few seconds.. Puck would find me. He would call an ambulance, but it would be too late. I would be gone a long time ago.

But those last seconds that I was alive.. I was happier than ever. Rachel and I were happier than ever. And I can honestly say..

I don't regret any of it.