Rachel Berry, Santana Lopez, and Jade West are best friends and major badasses. Jade is known for treatening people with her excessive amounts of scissors, Rachel is known for planning extravagant and stealthy attacks, and Santana, well she just goes 'All Lima Heights'.
The girls were currently sitting on the bleachers watching the Cheerios practice. "Ok question, how many Cheerios have you fucked, had suck you off, or made out with?" asked Jade as she turned to her best friends.
"Most of them except Queen Bitch, Tori, and Britney." stated a dazed Santana as she watched Britney begin to stretch.
"Yeah same except I'm still not sure if I had gotten that hand job from Becky or not." whispered a slightly confused Jade.
"What about you Rach?' asked Santana as she began to get hard watching a sweaty Britney run laps.
"The same for me too, except I'm certain I never got a hand job from Becky." replied Rachel while pointing at a fuming Jade.
"SHUT UP BEFORE I STAB YOU WITH MY SCISSORS!" yelled Jade as she lunged for Rachel.
"Hey Dick Van Dyke club get off my field now!" yelled Coach Sylvester through her blow horn. "No one wants you here, now scram."[A/N: got the Dick Van Dyke part from one of my favorite Quinn/Rachel stories called Knocked up]
After hearing that Santana stood up and did the unthinkable-she spoke back to Sue. "Yeah that's not what your Cheerios say. They tell us they want us to come here to see how flexible they are, and for us to fuck them to oblivion afterwards."
"Dude is she coming after us...she is run bitches run." yelled Rachel as she saw Sue charging towards them. As they made it into the building without being caught the three girls began to laugh. "Never do that again San, that women is psycho...She's like Jade psycho times fifty." stated a breathless Rachel.
"Yeah, Yeah come on lets head to homeroom."
Homeroom Jade's POV
As I look around the room I see some of the Cheerios staring in my direction. Some look mad-guess they got their asses handed to them-and some look plain old horny. Except Tori, she's laughing at something her D-bag boyfriend, Ryder, is saying. I seriously hate that ass. He once called my cousin Cat a dumbass and told her that she needed to go to a doctor so they could get all the stupid out of her. Poor girl was sad for an entire week. Anyway I think he's cheating on Tori. If i had Tori I would never cheat, I don't think I would look at another girl because she's the most beautiful girl I have ever seen. I snap out of my inner thoughts when i hear my name being called.
"Jadelyn West. Is Miss Jadelyn West here?" asked Mr. Brown, our homeroom teacher as he took roll.
"I'm here, and please don't call me Jadelyn. Its Jade just Jade." I seriously hate when people call me by my full name...Like really Jadelyn sounds like a sickness and far less badass than Jade.
"Ok thank you Miss. West." I turned around when I felt someone tap my shoulder. "What's up Rach?"
"I just thought of a sure fire way to get our girls attention. Listen up San this has to do with you as well." After Santana turns from speaking to some random girl Rachel continues. "We should join Glee club, we all can sing and we all can dance. What yall think?'
"I don't mind anything that can get me closer to Tori. And I will have Cat join with us." I said as I turned back in my seat.
"Yeah cool. Gets me closer to Britney so Yeah." That of course was Santana. I bet she's imagining Britney dancing by the way she looks now.
Lunch no POV
"Ok so we got what we're going to audition with?" asked Rachel as the three girls sat at their usual table in the cafeteria.
"Yup, Cat and I are going to sing a song that we wrote a while back. She was so excited, the only thing is that's she's scared Ryder's going to pick on her again." Replied Jade as she began to eat her pizza.
"That ain't gonna happen, but anyway I'm gonna sing some Amy Winehouse. What are you gonna do?"
"I was going to sing either 'Don't rain on my parade' or 'Mama who bore me'. What do you guys think." Asked Rachel
"I'm Jade West and I wouldn't give a fuck so I just say why not do both."
"Seriously you couldn't have just told her to do both, you had to say something about your self?"
"Indeed San, I did." They all began to laugh. Out of no where a flash of red ran up to Jade.
"Hey Jade, you wanna practice the song now since glee is next, cause its a half day and all?" asked an extremely excited Cat.
"Yeah sure, see you guys in Glee."
While Jade was walking with Cat towards the doors the two remaining girls yelled out, "By Jadelyn!".
"Fuck you both!" yelled Jade as she was pulled out of the cafeteria by Cat.
In the Choir room
Mr. Shue was standing at the white board writting the assingnment for glee club as the girls barged in. "How may I help you ladies today?" asked Mr. Shue, who seemed a tad bit suprised that the girls even set a foot into the class room.
"We will like to audition today." Replied Jade
"So you want to join the club?" asked Mr. Shue as he watched the three badasses and Cat wariely.
"Um yeah, did she not make herself clear Captin Von Drunkaton?"
"Um ok...who's going to go first?"
"Mr. Shue you can't let them join. They are a bad influence, and do they even come to school or go to their classes?" yelled a constipated looking Finn Hudson as he sat next to the beautiful Quinn Fabray.
"First of all Pilsberry Dough boy we go to class and I'm pretty sure we're even smarter than your incompetent ass, what with your .08 GPA and our 4.0 GPA. Think before you speak Golly Green Giant!" yelled Santana.
"What does the woman who help you drive places have to do with anything?" asked Finn as he got a look on his face that was probably his thinking face.
"You just proved my point hijo de puta tonto el culo."
"Ok, like I asked before...who is going first?"
"We will." replied Jade and Cat in unison.
"The dumbass red head can sing, this I gotta see." stated Ryder Daniels as he sat next to his girlfriend Tori Vega. The whole time Santana and Finn were arguing Tori kept her eyes locked on Jade. God why is she so fucking hot, and all she is doing is standing there.
"You'll see she'll wipe the flood with you, you wannabe badass." growled Jade.
[ Cat and Jade and both]
Someday I'll let you in
Treat you right- At that line Jade looked right into Tori's eyes
Drive you outta your mind
Oooh
You never met a chick like me
Burn so bright
I'm gonna make you blind
Always want what you can't have
Is it so bad
When you don't get what you wanted
Make you feel good
As I whip you
Into shape, ya boy
Let's get it started!
Give it up
You can't win
Cause I know where you've been
Such a shame
You don't put up a fight
That's a game that we play
At the end of the night
It's the same old story
But you never get it right
Give it up
Come a little closer
Baby, baby
Come a little closer
Baby, baby
So stop trying to walk away
No you won't ever leave me behind
(Noooo)
You better believe that I'm here to stay
(That's right)
Cause you're the shade and I'm the sunshine
(Ooooohh)
Look at me boy
'Cause I got you
Where I want you
Isn't it so exciting?
Wanna shake you
When I break you
Take a backseat boy
Cause now I'm driving
Give it up
You can't win
Cause I know where you've been
Such a shame
You don't put up a fight
That's a game that we play
At the end of the night
It's the same old story
But you never get it right
Give it up
A oooh yeaah
Ah oooho heeey
Hey yeah yeah yeaaaah
Come a little closer
Come a little closer
Baby, baby
Come a little closer
Come a little closer
Baby, baby
Come a little closer
Come a little closer
Baby
Yeah if you are my baby
And I'll make you crazy tonight- Jade looked at Tori while she sang that line. Tori began to blush under Jade's stare.
Look at me boy
'Cause I got you
Where I want you
Isn't it so exciting?
Wanna shake you
When I break you
Take a backseat boy
Cause now I'm driving
Give it up
You can't win
Cause I know where you've been
Such a shame
You don't put up a fight
That's a game that we play
At the end of the night
It's the same old story
But you never get it right
Give it up
Ohhhh
YEAH
"That was fantastic ladies, I have never heard that song before. Who is it by?" asked Mr. Shue as he watched the two with an awe ridden face.
"We wrote it like a week ago." replied a giddy Cat.
"Well then great, welcome to the New Directions. Please have a seat."
"Is this like One Direction only a new way, and not a boy band?" whispered Cat into Jade's ear.
"No Cat. Come on lets sit so we can listen to either San or Rach sing."
"KK." After the two girls sat down, Jade to Tori's right and Cat next to her Santana got up to sing.
"You did very good, you have a great voice." Said Tori as she leaned toward Jade
"Thank you beautiful." Tori blushed as red as a tomato when Jade called her beautiful.
"Ay yo Jade, shut up so I can get my singing on!"
"Ok damn San, sing, get it over with." "Yes, she is always this bitchy." Whispered Jade to Tori, making Tori begin to giggle.
"What's so funny babe?" asked Ryder as he heard Tori giggle. Before Tori could answer him Santana began to sing.
He left no time to regret
Kept his lips wet
With his same old safe bet
Me and my head high
And my tears dry
Get on without my guy
You went back to what you knew
So far removed from all that we went through
And I tread a troubled track
My odds are stacked
I'll go back to black
We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
I go back to us
I love you much
It's not enough
You love blow and I love puff
And life is like a pipe
And I'm a tiny penny rolling up the walls inside
We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
Black, black, black, black,
black, black, black,
I go back to
I go back to
We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
We only said good-bye with words
I died a hundred times
You go back to her
And I go back to
"Santana that was just...was just beautiful. You may have a seat."
"Mr. Shue since I'm going last is it ok if I sing two songs?...I wasn't sure which to choose." asked Rachel.
"Here comes her crazy!" screamed Santana from the back of the room.
"Go ahead Rachel you can do both songs."
Mama who bore me
Mama who gave me
No way to handle things
Who made me so sad
Mama, the weeping
Mama, the Angels
No sleep in Heaven
Or Bethlehem
Some pray that one day, Christ will come a'-callin'
They light a candle and hope that it glows
And some just lie there crying for Him to come and find them
But when He comes they don't know how to go
Mama who bore me
Mama who gave me
No way to handle things
Who made me so sad
Mama, the weeping
Mama. the Angels
No sleep in Heaven
Or Bethlehem
"Good job Rachel." Praised Mr. Shue. After speaking to the band the music for 'Don't rain on my parade' began to play.
Don't tell me not to live,
Just sit and putter,
Life's candy and the sun's
A ball of butter.
Don't bring around a cloud
To rain on my parade!
Don't tell me not to fly-
I've simply got to.
If someone takes a spill,
It's me and not you.
Who told you you're allowed
To rain on my parade!
I'll march my band out,
I'll beat my drum,
And if I'm fanned out,
Your turn at bat, sir.
At least I didn't fake it.
Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it!
But whether I'm the rose
Of sheer perfection,
Or freckle on the nose
Of life's complexion,
The cinder or the shiny apple of its eye,
I gotta fly once,
I gotta try once,
Only can die once, right, sir?
Ooh, life is juicy,
Juicy, and you see
I gotta have my bite, sir!
Get ready for me, love,
cause I'm a commer,
I simply gotta march,
My heart's a drummer.
Don't bring around a cloud
To rain on my parade!
I'm gonna live and live now,
Get what I want-I know how,
One roll for the whole show bang,
One throw, that bell will go clang,
Eye on the target and wham
One shot, one gun shot, and BAM
Hey, Mister Arnstein,
Here I am!
I'll march my band out,
I will beat my drum,
And if I'm fanned out,
Your turn at bat, sir,
At least I didn't fake it.
Hat, sir, I guess I didn't make it.
Get ready for me, love,
'cause I'm a commer,
I simply gotta march,
My heart's a drummer.
Nobody, no, nobody
Is gonna rain on my parade!
"Damn the Midget Ninja got some pipes. Now I'm gonna fight her for some solos." yelled an impressed Mercedes.
"Excellent Rachel..now before we leave the theme of the assignment is love. It could be love at first sight, unwanted love, a song about crushes, and you may even sing about lust if you can't find a song on love. So have good weekend and have a song ready by Monday." As everyone left our three favorite badasses, though one was a crazy diva at times, began to formulate song choices.
"I was thinking that I should sing Mr. Brightside." stated Jade as they stood next to her black mustang.
"That sounds cool. We should all have something awesome by Monday." stated Santana as she got into her red convertible. And with that the three girls and Cat went home to start brainstorming.
At Rachel's house
Guess dad also had a half day. Thought Rachel as she parked her motorcycle behind her father's BMW. "Dad you in her". yelled Rachel as she walked into the house.
"Yup sweetheart I'm in the Kitchen...we are going to have company over today, so I will like you to dress appropriately and not in your usual attire of boxers and a wife-beater." replied Hirman Berry, who was now cooking a feast for kings.
"Cool, who's coming over?" asked a very curious Rachel. Usually people stayed away from the gay men with the daughter who had a dick
"It's a surprise..technically it's a surprise for your daddy..but you can't keep a secrete..soooo.I'm not tellin'"
"Whatever. I'm going upstairs to start on my homework...oh and I joined Glee club." As Rachel was making her way up to her room she heard a distant. "Ok hunny have fun."
30 minutes before their guest were to show up Rachel was in her room, with a towel wrapped around her body, going through her closet looking for something proper. After 10 minutes of searching Rachel decided to wear black skinny jeans, a black botton down shirt, and red bow tie, with her brand new red chucks. After finishing with the last touches of her outfit Rachel heard her father calling for her to join them and their guests.
The first thing Rachel saw was the nicest ass she has ever seen. Fuck this girl got a nice ass..Let me see your face baby. When said girl turned around Rachel almost had a heart attack.
"Quinn.. ." Damn since when do I get nervous..Damn the effect you have on me Quinn Fabray.
"Hi Rachel, love the outfit. It suits you perfectly."
"You look beautiful as always Quinn." After seeing Quinn blush Rachel smirked inwardly. Still got it even in front of her.
An hour after dinner
"How about you two go to Rachel's room while us adults reminisce."
"Sure. Come on Quinn, I will give you an exclusive tour of my room." winked Rachel.
As they made their way to Rachel's room, Judy Fabray yelled, "Don't do any naughty things you two!"
A surprised Rachel opened the door to her room and said, "I think our parents are drunk already."
"I think so too, that's why I'm driving us home tonight." "So got anything fun to do in here?" asked Quinn as she sat down on Rachel's bed and surveyed the room.
"Yeah, we can watch a movie or play either my XBox or Playstation 3. You pick."
"How about you tell me why you decided to join Glee today?"
Smirking, Rachel sat next to Quinn. "How 'bout because I wanted to be near this sexy blonde with captivating hazel eyes and an ass to die for."
"Oh really, you do know I have a boyfriend don't you?" replied Quinn in a husky voice
Rachel leaned towards Quinn's ear and husked, "Who says I was talking about you?" They only response Quinn made was arching a sexy eyebrow at Rachel if only to say Really I'm the only blonde with hazel eyes in glee
"Whatever, he won't be able to take care of that body like I can"
"Oh I can't wait for you to do that, but let me tell you this: You gotta woo me to get me and only me."
"Yes ma'am"
"And like I said earlier, you look hella sexy in this outfit. Wear something like that to school. While Quinn taking in Rachel's sexiness her mother called for them to leave. Quinn leaned into Rachel's ear to whisper, "Make sure to sing me a special song on monday, and you can start by wooing me too seeing as it's Valentines day."
Ten minutes after Quinn left Rachel took out her phone and began to text.
To Jade, Satan: Guess who was at my house for dinner
From Jade: Dude, I have a girl over now just tell me
From Satan: Did Satan come to collect your soul for some of Hirman's amazing cooking
To Jade: Quinn, her mom and my dads were friends in high school..but anyways me and Quinn flirted, and she told me to start wooing her if i want her
To Satan: Nope, you weren't there today...Quinn was though..and now I have to start wooing her
From Jade: Cool dude...I gotta go this chick is fucking stripping for me...TOTALLY GETTIN' SOME TONIGHT
From Satan: Fuck you puta...But seriously cool...now I'm going to sleep before Mami ask me to help her clean again..Bitch be acting cray-cray
With that Rachel fell asleep with thoughts of Quinn and how to woo her on her mind.
A/N: please review...I will also like to know if you guys would want other characters from Victorious on here and If you want Britney to date Artie or not thank you for reading this i appritaite it