Hi guys! okay so this is my first story ever. Feel free to read and comment or whatever. I'll probably make a few chapters if people are interested! SO ENJOYYY.

I can't get her away from me, whether or not she is physically close to me, there is always a constant stream of thoughts pertaining to her running through my mind.

I don't understand why she can't just put those perfect legs to use and walk away. I don't want her to. But it is too hard to look at her and know that I will never get the chance to be with her how I want.

I want to hold her when she is sad and even when she is happy. I want to wish upon a star with her, then tell her: "I don't need to wish on a star because I already have everything that I would wish for and she is the brightest star I know." I want to get lost in her expressive eyes with no intention of finding my way out. I want to get so lost in them that they become familiar. That in order to survive I'd have to set up camp and make those chocolate pools my home. Except it isn't survival I am worried about, it is that I might get so lost in her eyes that I am blind to what would make her happy. And maybe I'm not what will make her happy.

Finn Hudson, also known as: the giant oaf with little to no coordination (it's a wonder he was even able to play football) and the gassy-baby with the early arrival problems. Yet this boy with boobs to rival my own has her heart in his hand but continually proceeds to break it whenever he is feeling sad or worthless, without consequence. So he makes her feel worthless so he can feel better, which actually sounds like bullying, come to think of it. So essentially Rachel is dating a man who is verbally abusive towards her.

But I guess that is hypocritical coming from me since I verbally tortured her for all of those years when I was in a Cheerios uniform. Hey, at least I never tried to actually damage her emotions; it was just bad nicknames and pornographic drawings, rather than directly targeting her insecurities and constantly reminding her of them. I am not trying to validate my wrongdoings of the past, because what I did was so, so wrong. I am just trying to make the point that no one who is as close to her as Finn Hudson is, should be demeaning her and making her feel worthless just for the hell of it. He is her FIANCE. He needs to understand that his job is to lift her up not tear her down then stomp on her until she is broken into a million pieces…or maybe a better analogy would be "kick chairs at her until she is battered and bruised."

What ever the proper analogy might be, it doesn't change the fact that Finn Hudson makes my blood boil, especially in this moment. I don't get how he can stand there, looking at the girl he supposedly loves cry because of something he said to her. All I want to do is smack him on the side of the head and yell at him for being an idiot.

Looking around the choir room, I can tell that everyone else is thinking the same thing; that she deserves better than him. His last words echoing like a ghost in my head.

"I don't get why you don't just stay here with me, in Lima, we could raise a family and I could work at Burt's shop. Lets face it, you probably won't get into NYADA and there are a lot of actresses in New York, so, I mean, you probably won't get a role. If we go to New York, just my job won't pay the bills, cause those fancy apartments cost a lot and I can't be the only one providing for our family. Let's just stay in Lima, it would be better for us…you could even teach Glee club here at McKinley High! You'd get to sing and stuff, it would be perfect for you!"

After that foot-in-mouth speech, my jaw was on the floor. I mean I knew that he never wanted to go to New York, but I didn't realize how much he had been banking on Rachel wanting to stay with him in Lima.

For Rachel's part, she looks just as appalled as everyone else at what Finn just said to her. The myriad of emotions that cross her face are difficult to decipher through the tears that started to fall midway through his speech. But she stands there in shock, as she stares at him with tear-filled eyes, she looked at him with what seemed to be betrayal and sadness among other emotions that I could not place. My heart wretched at the inner turmoil I see in those normally happy chocolate pools. Then her eyes went wide as if she was surprised, then suddenly became hard. The sudden shift in the atmosphere had everyone confused, as they stared at the couple in front of them. Rachel took what was almost an eerily calm breath then, with a serene voice, she said:

"Well Finn, I am SO glad you finally figured out your future plans." A smug smile begins to play upon his lips, thinking that he got what he wanted. Seeing this she begins to walk (more like glides) slowly towards him, then leans in close to his ear.

"But unfortunately, there is one flaw in your plan." Of course she ads a dramatic pause, she is Rachel Berry after all.

He leans back and looks into her eyes, confused. "There is?"

She takes a step back, looks directly into his eyes and says, "I won't be in it." She spins around on her heel and walks out with her head held high. Just before she passes the threshold from the choir room to the hallway, she stops and turns, facing Finn (who was looking gassy again). She reaches for her left ring finger with her right hand, pulls the modest engagement ring off of her finger and casually drops it to the floor before continuing her stroll out the door.