Bouquets and Brickbats

My collection of random short stories and they will almost always have a Harry and Hermione pairing. Rating may vary from K to T and I may bump it up if there are any mature themes. These stories do not have any common theme and may not even make sense why I typed them up, so love them or hate them (Bouquets and Brickbats), it's up to you.

I will keep on adding to this whenever an inspiration strikes me but does not fit into a bigger or a meaningful story. I may use some of these in my future stories but not for sure; if any one of you feels that these bits and pieces may help you out, please feel free to use them. That is the greatest compliment you could give me.

Story Number 1:

This is my first story where Dumbledore is outright evil…

"Oh! How I hate Albus Bloody Dumbledore"

After the war ended with Lord Voldemort's death at the hands of Harry Potter, the wizarding world rejoiced in the victory of the light side against the darkest of the dark. People enjoyed their new found freedom and generally were happy, well almost everyone as our two heroes, one of them a woman were anything but happy.

You see it all started in the sixth year of Harry, Hermione, and Ron's stay at the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and wizardry, it actually started much before that but for the purposes of this story let's just say that it all started in their sixth year.

Hermione began considering Ronald Weasley as a potential boyfriend and even showed a jealous side to her that was never known to either Ron or Harry. Slowly but surely things began to clear up between Hermione and Ron and it even looked like they would get together sooner rather than later as Ron seemed to reciprocate her feelings. The hunt for Lord Voldemort's horcruxes put a dampener on any thoughts of romance as the three of them were living in a tent, a magical one to be sure but still a tent. Even then with Ron clearly sticking close to Hermione after his return to join them on the hunt after a minor hiccup, showed his eagerness to gain her affections.

The searing kiss they shared during the final battle bore testimony to their mutual attraction. Happy and secure in the knowledge that she would finally have one of the men who frequented her dreams, as a boyfriend soon, she went to Australia with a promise to return as soon as she could with her parents's memory restored. However upon her return she was shocked to learn that Ron moved on and began dating, well without naming anyone, a busty blonde Hufflepuff from their own year.

Hermione was devastated and decided to get away from the magical world for at least a few years and so joined Oxford University for her English literature major. There was one other man who also frequented her dreams but she always believed that he was unreachable and certain events conspired to make him unreachable and those events are the focus of this story.

She was not the only one to take the decision to leave the magical world behind, as Harry decided on the same path independently, albeit choosing Estate management as his major. The many deaths during the battle, some of them of people he considered family and friends changed him, even though logically he knew that he was not responsible, his conscience disagreed. He could not entertain thoughts of enjoying himself when little Teddy Lupin was left an orphan or when Mrs. Weasley was still grieving over Fred's death. Ginny sensed the change in him and gave him the space he needed for which he was thankful, he knew that the brief fling he had with her during his sixth year was his desperate craving for some normalcy and nothing more.

With events weighing heavily on his mind, Harry decided not to continue his final year at Hogwarts, he no longer wanted to be an auror, and he looked forward to a life of peace and quiet. So he moved away from the magical world and with the inheritance from his parents coming through a year late, he was well set for money. That also offered him an alternative and so he joined Oxford for a course on management, which would help him take better care of the vast Potter estate.

Hermione agreed to share a two bedroom flat with Harry, he was paying for it and as it was near the University it was convenient for her too. They decided not to finish their final year of magical education at Hogwarts instead elected to sit for their N.E. when they were ready whether it was in a year or in five they did not care.

Though Minister Shacklebolt smoothened things for them so that they could get admission without the need for any qualifying marks or tests, Harry and Hermione had to work hard in the first year as they had to relearn a lot of things. It was not studies all the time as they enjoyed trips to the movies, dinners, and even the occasional park whenever their brains were crammed to the limit and needed them to unwind.

The closeness they once had during the early years at Hogwarts reappeared and the ease with which they fit together in each other's lives prompted their newer friends to label them as a couple and Harry and Hermione did nothing to dissuade that thought. One Saturday evening, things decidedly took a turn towards bringing an end to the status quo, whether it was a good or a bad turn; I leave it to you to decide.

The after dinner movie on the TV could certainly be classified as a romance, and both Harry and Hermione got into the swing of things; they began to kiss whenever the on screen couple did. It was not the first kiss for either of them or the first time they shared a kiss but it was special nonetheless, whether it was the corny romance on screen or the blossoming hope of a relationship between them, Harry felt right when kissing her. What started as a gentle kiss heated up very quickly and the movie was forgotten; Harry's hands began roaming over Hermione's body and she matched his actions and pace.

Harry felt he was in heaven and for the first time in his life he felt as if he got what he wanted, but he wanted and was ready for more. Just when he was mulling over the problem of how to put it to Hermione without botching things up too much, Hermione pulled back abruptly.

Eyes glistening with tears, she choked out, "I am sorry Harry, but I cannot have a relationship with you." Just like that she rose and headed into her bedroom, her anguish spilling over into wracking sobs.

Harry was left dumbfounded, he was devastated but he was confused too. He was sure that Hermione wanted a relationship with him; he could feel it in his very bones and if the kisses they shared that night were not enough evidence, she letting his hands roam over places that by her own admission, she never allowed anyone else access, was enough.

Nothing he thought of could give him a clue as to her behavior and finally tired of trying to understand the female mind, he retired to his own room.

Harry was usually an early riser but the events of the night and his own thoughts dragging late into the night, and it being a Sunday, gave him the excuse to have a lie in. Finally late into the morning, he decided to start the day and finishing his morning routine entered the kitchen only to find Hermione sitting there nursing a cup of coffee.

"Good Morning, Harry" she greeted him.

Harry could see that she also had a rough night; her eyes were red and puffed up and her hair bushier than normal. Courtesy demanded that he reply her greeting but he was not in a generous mood; still Hermione was his best friend and was sure to have an explanation for her actions. Before he could even formulate an adequate response, Hermione spoke again; she understood the dilemma that Harry was facing and so bailed him out.

Hermione offered him the cup of coffee that she poured out for him and so Harry moved to the counter to start on breakfast. He was the one to prepare breakfast whenever they decided to have it at home, as her skills at cooking were legendary; the perfect example for how not to cook.

"I have to tell you something Harry" she said.

'Oh yes, you do' he though viciously but refrained from speaking out loud. Instead he nodded his head as an indication that he heard her and was waiting for the explanation and got busy with making their breakfast. However angry he might have been with Hermione, he could not let her starve; if it was anyone else he might have, but he could never do that to Hermione.

"Do you remember our fourth year when no one was talking to you except me, even Ron?"

Harry scoffed at that, "How could I not?"

"Right" She paused and took a deep breath before continuing, "I swore that I would never leave your side no matter what, we even pinky swore" she blushed slightly remembering that incident. It was so serious at that time, her need to assure Harry that he was not alone but looking back at it, it now felt silly. Unfortunately it was that silly little girl's fantasy that spelled doom for her.

Harry took some time to remember what she was alluding to but then his eyes lighted up, "It was in the library, I also remember a distinct chime that rang when we made that pact."

She gave him a rueful smile, talk about hitting the nail on its head, "Yes, that chime alerted Dumbledore that something significant happened and when he came to know about it from Madam Pince, he called me to his office and he…" she choked back a sob which alarmed Harry that something was amiss. Luckily he finished making the eggs and so switched off the stove and moved to Hermione's side.

Taking comfort from Harry's hand on her shoulder she continued, "… he cursed me, Harry."

"WHAT!" Harry nearly screamed his head off.

"He was worried that we were getting a little too close for his comfort and so he took steps to ensure that never happened. I was not sure why at that time but after getting to know about the prophecy I understood. He was worried that you would not go to your death willingly if you had my love in your life."

Harry gave her shoulder a comforting squeeze and breakfast was all but forgotten. "I thought back to that night of the battle many times and realized it myself. I was willing to give up my life to see that everyone else had the chance at it. I did not have any love in my life…."

Here he was interrupted by Hermione with, "… but Ginny…"

"No not really, I thought I was in love with her, but no, I was only in love with the idea of having a girlfriend. I was really in love with someone else but she was unreachable to me at that time. So I had nothing to live for."

She was facing away from him, not having had the courage to meet his eye during her own recital, but if she had looked at him Hermione would have seen the blazing fire in his eyes when he said that looking down at her. "…but if we had gotten together during our fourth year, I would have taken you with me to watch Snape's memory or at least told you about it and you would have stopped me and probably come up with a much better plan than Dumbledore's."

"You can bet your fortune that I would have."

A short silence followed that statement and Harry looked longingly at the hot breakfast but was too concerned and polite to start on it when Hermione refused.

"Any way, the curse he used on me was designed to kill anyone who I have had sex with for the first time" she blurted out as fast as she could.

Harry was shocked beyond words; he merely gaped at her for the longest time wondering if he had heard correctly. Finally unable to articulate any response he slowly said, "O…..K!"

Now that she got the most important bit out she could not stop herself, she was desperate to make him understand why it was tearing her heart into pieces. For the longest time she dreamed of a life with Harry but now that it was within reach she could not hold on to it.

"That was why I agreed to go with Victor Krum to the Yule Ball even though, forget about tradition; I was going to ask you."

She chuckled at Harry's shock, "What? I knew that you were clueless and pining for Cho while she was definitely out of your reach, she was already dating Cedric by that time. Victor was a safe bet, if I went with you, I might have kissed you on the dance floor itself."

"But I thought that you liked him and I know for sure that you kissed him."

"He kissed me actually but it was just a small peck good night and that was the only time too. As for liking him, he was arrogant and could even give Draco Malfoy a run for his money. No, he knew and I knew that it was going to be just a small fling and we were happy with that. My real first kiss was you, me kissing you at the end of that year."

"But that was only on the cheek…" Harry protested.

"… Still I consider that as my first kiss" Hermione challenged him but got no response in return, who was he to protest when a girl admits that he was her first kiss. "… and counting that my tally of kisses was three, before we started to kiss whenever the fancy struck."

"Then Ron…"

"The summer before our sixth year, Molly told me that seeing that Ron was smitten with me and I too was with him, though I definitely was not, asked Dumbledore to create an exception for Ron."

"Could that even be done?" Harry wondered.

"I don't think so, at least not after casting the curse, although that particular curse might have had the option or she was conned into thinking that I do not know, but I digress. That was the reason I was jealous of Lavender, I did not want them to have a lasting relationship, and Ron was my ticket to a family, to children."

She continued, "We did not, or at least I did not know for sure though if it was done…"

"… and then Dumbledore went and got himself killed" Harry supplied.

Hermione nodded her head in agreement, "… and Dumbledore died. Ginny told me that Dumbledore made the exception before he died though. Was she sure of the fact or did she just wanted me out of the way so that she could pursue you, I do not know?"

"… and then Ron chickened out" Harry's eyes grew wide with that realization.

Hermione agreed, "That told me that everything was not as it should have been."

"Oh! How I hate Albus Bloody Dumbledore!" Harry groaned pressing the heels of his palms into his eyes. For once Hermione refrained from chiding him for his language; her own sentiments were exactly the same. He gave her a look that was a mixture of chagrin and sympathy, "I thought that I made my peace with the old man but something new comes up questioning my decision."

He slowly got up from the chair in front of her and moved to her chair. He lifted Hermione up from the chair and sat down on it before placing her into his lap and tightened his arms around her. Hermione buried her head into his chest relishing the warm comfort that was on offer, she had no more tears to cry, having expended them on lonely nights over the years and after the devastation of Ron's defection.

"Surely, there's a counter for this?"

"I looked everywhere Harry but did not find any reference to the curse. I do not know for sure if Dumbledore played a bluff just to keep me away from you. All I know is what he told me; there are only two ways for the curse to be lifted. He cancels it himself…"

"With him conveniently dead, that option is long gone…"

"… and the other is" she paused, both ashamed at the implication and the inevitability of the solution. Harry remained silent, letting her find her own pace but continued giving her his support and planted a kiss on her temple. "… and the other option is for someone to sacrifice himself willingly…"

A few minutes of silence followed, in which both Hermione and Harry were deep in thought, Hermione was fretful as she knew that there was no other option for Harry but to accept the inevitable and seek a relationship elsewhere, maybe he would go back to Giny? Though it broke her heart even to think about that, she was resigned to be practical. All her carefully constructed walls crumbled however, when Harry buried his head in her bushy mane and whispered into her ear, "… I am willing, Hermione."

That declaration was so shocking to Hermione that she nearly ended up on the floor when she whipped her head around to stare at Harry. She broke out of his tight embrace and leaned as far back as she could, without getting off Harry's lap as he refused to let her go, and managed to look him in the eye. There she only saw determination, and a hint of recklessness that was evident before Sirius' death and amazingly no hint of hesitation or worse levity.

Though she was feeling extremely grateful, she had to squash that notion in the bug, "Don't be daft Harry; you cannot throw away your life like that."

"For you, I can." His resolve only strengthened further.

"I am fully prepared to die a virgin spinster if only I have you in my life Harry, but you, you have every chance of making your dream of having a family come true. You deserve every happiness in life."

"… and you don't?"

She sighed, "My bed had been made Harry, for better or for worse, I am struck with this and for life. You have been my best friend for more than nine years now and I will take that satisfaction." With that she settled back into his embrace, resting her head in the crook of his neck.

"It's not fair Hermione, you sacrificed so much for me, you put your life on hold for the horcruxes, you fought with your parents for wiping out their memories, you gave up a life that brought much cheer and the recognition you deserved… and now this and that too because of me. Let me do my share for once, let me make your life happy."

"What's my life without you in it? How could I live with myself knowing that I was the one responsible for it?"

"… and how can I be happy knowing that you were unhappy and when it was not of your volition?"

She snorted, "You will find yourself a good girl and be happy, one who will give you all the love she has and settle down with her and start a big family."

"I've already found one" his throat rumbled with emotion when he said that.

Hermione sighed in exasperation, "Harry…"

"Look, why do we have to talk about my dying, we could still live together without having physical intimacy."

"Harry, that's not how it's supposed to be. You are to have a family."

"So what! You will be my family; I will also die a virgin."

Her eyes started to well up again but this time it was in gratitude, "Harry, you cannot do that; you have a heritage to uphold. The Potter name has been a very prominent one through years, centuries even."

This time he grinned, "Oh, you silly girl, the Potter legacy is more than flesh and blood, or even brick and mortar for that matter. I have started several things that would uphold the legacy in both the worlds, muggle and magical alike long after even our grandchildren die, you would be so proud. Why do you think I joined the management course?"

She wanted to know what he was doing that he was sure would make her proud, really wanted to know, but now was not the time. Even though her resistance was slowly being dismantled as she would want nothing more than spend her life with him, but she still had to try and dissuade him.

Harry was relentless though, whatever argument she had, he had a counter ready and it started to look attractive for her; he would have made a brilliant sales executive.

He had one final point that shot all her protests down, "I admit that having sex and making love are a big part of a marriage; but physical intimacy is not the only thing that makes a marriage, is it?"

"No, it's not" Hermione had to admit.

"We can adopt too; there are so many orphans around the world, we could give them a home and a better life, at least much better than what I had growing up."

There it was all laid down; she had to be heartless to shoot that down. With a triumphant grin he continued, "If you want to have our child, we could go for artificial insemination, there are so many ways to counter the curse that was intended to affect only if we have sex. If you are still skeptical we could go with the blood adoption ritual… We have a lifetime to get to the bottom of this curse, My Love, please do not deny the happiness you deserve and that I deserve."

Hermione knocked them both sideways out of the chair and onto the floor. She began kissing him fervently and this time there was no restraint. They gave vent to their passion as much as they could within the restrictions imposed by the curse, of course; breakfast was much more filling than usual for them.

That was the original ending of the story but I am a sucker for a happy Harry- Hermione pairing so here goes nothing…..

As soon as their University education came to an end, our heroes married in a simple ceremony that was attended by the Grangers, Andromeda Tonks, and a few of their University friends; five year old Teddy Lupin was the ring bearer. The Weasleys and the wizarding press were of course uninvited.

They left to a muggle Caribbean island resort for their honeymoon. Passionate kisses led to much more pleasurable activities but they were naturally unsatisfied.

"This is so frustrating…"

"Agreed, but I am sure that I can take care of your frustration again… Mrs. Potter" he waggled his eyebrows suggestively while getting dressed.

"I will gladly take you up on that challenge my husband" then she sighed, "… but later, we are getting late for dinner."

Before they could go out however, there was a flash of light and two apparitions were looking at the couple with beaming smiles. Harry and Hermione recognized them immediately, as their photograph was placed quite prominently in the flat they shared, they were James and Lily Potter.

Harry was shocked, "Mum! Dad!" and Hermione was holding back tears.

"Listen, we don't have much time but we came to tell you that the curse on Hermione has been lifted" Lily gushed.

"What…? How…?" Harry stuttered, not that he was happy, but it was unexpected.

James beamed, "It's all thanks to your Mum; she ripped a new one for Dumbledore."

Lily actually blushed, well, as much as a sprit could anyway, "Sacrifices are of many different kinds and need not only be of life to influence magic, in many cases the intent of the sacrifice is enough. You sacrificed a lot, both of you for each other and I was not going to let some bony arse ruin it for you."

The story originally did not have Lily's rant; instead it was what I have added below. Using the 'Master of Death' card appeared a little too cliché and the thought of one of the most powerful wizards cowering under the wrath of a mother appeared funny. Then after seeing the reviews and the response to this, I wanted to include the original idea too and even George (He posted it as a guest) wanted to see that; so this came out of the recycle bin…

Take Two

"Besides, you are the 'Master of Death' Harry, the curse would not have had any effect on you" James interjected.

"I was…"

"No, you need not have the Hallows together all the time, the magic of they being together had already accepted you as the 'Master of Death'. It makes no difference if you have them with you at all times or not" Lily supplied.

Harry was still skeptical but it was his wife who provided him the final reason to accept, "You did not destroy the stone, did you?"

"No" Harry finally accepted that he was indeed the 'Master of Death' and all their heart ache, especially that of Hermione was of no consequence. 'If only they had known it before, she would not have wasted her time and emotional anguish she felt after having been snubbed by the immature prat' Harry and Hermione thought to themselves.

Would they have still taken the step to get their education from the Muggle world, or gone to Hogwarts, was anyone's guess.

Hermione was overwhelmed, "Thanks, Mrs. Potter" she managed to say.

"Oh no! Thank you, Mrs. Potter for taking care of my son."

"You can now have all the children you want" James was nearly jumping for joy. "Fill the world with Potters" he managed to say before he winked out with his wife.

They decided to do just that starting with tonight … but dinner first.