A/N: I've honestly have never tried to make a "futa" fan fiction. I've always thought it would be fun, or exciting to do, but I've never really had the courage. For the past few months, I'd been fleshing out the idea, and now, with something in place, I'd like to try writing one. I'm doing this to test my creative limits, and I decided it would be a good way to give my inspiration a kick start. I am warning everyone though, that this idea is one that I know I will struggle with, and that's precisely why I'm doing it. That said, if you don't enjoy futa, and the basic idea of what that would entail, I would suggest you turn around and run like the plague. I can't guarantee the quality, but I shall do the best I can. Don't be alarmed if I crash the two worlds a bit, but you won't see any super natural fun here.

On a side note, I may compress multiple chapters together when I update, that's for my sanity, if nothing more. Consider it a new writing style. That, and the updates will be longer that way. That said, on with the fan fiction. Please, read and review. I hope you enjoy this first installment.

I don't own Mai HiME, Mai Otome... you know the drill.

A/N #2: We're going to play a little game... that game is called fix the clutterfuck! A.K.A: edit all of the spelling errors and other idiocy I have floating around in stupid places...Why? Well that's because this is actually going to be put up on the AO3, like I promised it eventually would be...new little additives here also, but not anything that changes plot line.

Prologue
(POV, Natsuki's Father)

It was an early morning, one fateful day, in the middle of August. The sun hadn't even begun to greet the sky when a small baby was born. Blotchy, a small tuft of midnight hair peeked out of the blue receiving blanket. Her eyes, when she chose to open them, were blue, just like all infants. It was the morning of the fifteenth when a baby known as Kuga Natsuki had been brought into this world.

As a newborn, she never thought of herself as different, and perhaps that had been a good thing. Even as her eyes changed from soft blue into stunning emerald, Natsuki was always a good baby. Still, with age innocence wanes out. There would inevitably come times in her small life when she would take notice of particular things. She would realize she didn't fit the mold.

We feared when that day would come, honestly.

Kuga Saeko, the mother of the child, did everything she could to dote on our daughter. That is, if you could really claim Natsuki to be a female. I couldn't. I'd always thought of her as a son, she did have those particular qualities about her. I had hoped she'd look like a boy, lord knew she fit that personality perfectly. She didn't look male, my daughter forever the enigma. At any rate, we always tried to do for her, as any loving and nonjudgmental, parent would do. It wasn't easy. Parenting never is. Even so, I felt as if I'd failed her in some tragic way.

Her face was feminine, her voice just like her mother. She grew her hair out, although, I inwardly wished she'd cut it short. It made her look even more like a girl, it helped her fit in, I suppose. My daughter was a tomboy at best, and I dared never to muse the worst. When Natsuki was a little girl, we did our best to shield her from the realities. She took private classes, away from other children...we knew she'd be safe that way. Perhaps we sheltered her more than we should have.

She had a few neighborhood friends, but we never allowed sleepovers. I'd like to think Natsuki grew up in a happy home, at least, in the beginning. She was for the most part a normal, if not intuitive, child. She made the same embarrassing discoveries all children do, although, the ones she had were quite confusing. Imagine her shock when she ran into my bedroom unabashed one morning, only to find that I was still getting dressed. Most little girls would have screamed, giggled, or at least blushed...they'd be curious later on, surely.

I would have expected that, but Natsuki, she wasn't a normal little girl.

It was a difficult road as a parent, trying to explain exactly why she and I looked the same. Why she didn't look like mommy, or other girls in some areas. It was difficult, and at the time, I realized, my struggles as her father had only just begun. Saeko, my late wife, cared deeply for our daughter, and had done her best to make Natsuki as womanly as possible. At the age of six, Natsuki lost her mother in a fatal car accident. Her passing was difficult on both of us.

That's when the rebellion began, and Natsuki, even more rebellious than before, bent the moral codes, tearing the very idea of gender away from her form, throwing it out the proverbial window like baggage. She'd dress like a girl one day, a boy the next. She'd play with makeup, and then, she'd go play in the dirt. Natsuki tried to be everything at once, and for a few years, it wasn't simply due to being happy.

It was as if she didn't know who she was, or rather, who she could be in the future...I suppose I'm getting ahead of myself.

Emotionally, over time, she lost me too. It was my fault, I admit, for being so hard on Natsuki. Up until that point, I'd been happy to allow Natsuki to decide everything, I hadn't been a very strict father. If she wanted to play rough, I was the one throwing her in the air, or letting her jump on my back. In a way, Natsuki was everything I needed. She was my son, my pride and joy...and yet...without meaning to be, she also became my little wallflower, afraid to leave her father's side. When she was about ten, things got worse.

Saeko had wanted a baby girl more than anything, and, Natsuki looked more like a woman than a man. She would grow up with breast, I was sure. She would have a figure I couldn't simply conceal, so I made a choice for the both of us.

She hated me for it before, and I'm sure she still loathes me, even now. I remember it like it was yesterday, it was the first time we ever had a fight. A bad one at that. I sent her away to an all girls school. Only the faculty knew of the situation, they didn't like me either, I'm sure. I was a disgrace as her father, but I thought I'd be doing the best thing for her. I-I couldn't raise a daughter on my own. I wasn't cut out for that, and Natsuki, she needed more help than I could give. She'd lost her mother, and I wasn't the type of man who could simply let Saeko become a memory. The academy had dorms, and Natsuki would be given her own. I could leave her in protective care, womanly care, and I thought she would be alright.

That's what I had hoped, that she would become happy.

I'd made that wish, with all my might. Weekly I'd get letters from my daughter, on occasion, a phone call. She'd yell at me, saying she didn't want to be there anymore. I almost gave in. Back when she begged me to send her to an all male academy, I tried to think about how I could make that possible...I couldn't though, not really. Natsuki would be out of place, and it would only get worse as she aged.

I knew that, and so, I left her in the academy.

I also set up a trust fund for when she graduated, I did the best I could. It wasn't enough, I realized that when she told me to get out of her life. She was twelve back then...I hated it...but I complied. I never contacted her again, and stayed out of her life. I awaited letters that never came. I cried over the loss of everything I couldn't protect, and I felt like a helpless man, my daughter the victim of a broken home by default. I moved on, slowly, and very painstakingly so.

It was the only choice I had, so I took it.

I remarried, as if to regain some form of happiness. I wrote Natsuki about the wedding, and received not a single reply. When I had the joy of becoming a father a second time, I wrote Natsuki again, to tell her about her newborn sister. Natsuki never contacted me, never called, never cared. Years have past since then, children grow in leaps and bounds. Natsuki is seventeen now, in an entirely different world. She's not the child I knew, that much is simply fate. I wonder how she is...all the time. I worry about her, yet, I can't force her to come back. I won't dote upon someone who sees me as unimportant. I won't welcome someone who may tear apart what little family I have, I won't lose what I've got.

That still begs the question though, one I've always wondered. How is she doing? I doubt I'll never know. I wish her the best of life, she surely has the best of my pocket book...

Chapter 1

Natsuki sighed at the fact that her dorm room was smaller than an average room.

She wanted, no, needed a bigger television set. She couldn't complain much, she assumed, since she had the entire place to herself. Most rooms held multiple girls, at least two or three. Some rooms held upwards of four or five, but Natsuki's room was her own. She liked the solitude. She could play her video games in peace, study without interruptions, host poker parties until the cows came home, and no one, not even the headmistress dared to say a word. She'd lived a good life in the academy walls. She loved it really, having grown up in the system for nearly her entire life. In her mind, she belonged here, and her eyes darkened as she realized that soon she'd be leaving campus for good.

She didn't know what she should do, life in the outside world was fast approaching. The flickering of her violent game didn't offer any solace either. "Got you again Kuga!" A voice shouted, garbling in victory.

Natsuki rolled her eyes at the horrible sound. "Damn it Nao, get a new microphone." She was going to go deaf one day if that kept up. She knew it. Nao's sorry excuse for a mouthpiece had been on the fritz for the past year. She disregarded it as her character flashed to life again. "I'm sure if you ask, Aoi has an extra, she'll at least let you borrow it."

"Like hell she will." Another voice chimed in. This time, it was Chie. "I've got Aoi's. She and Mai went out again singing, so I nabbed it while she's out." The sounds of clicking could be heard as the girls all mashed buttons on their controllers, an all out warfare going on. "Nao, you slime ball. Get back here!" It was over before Nao could retaliate, Natsuki took out both girls from range, and with that the round was over. "Geez, I'll never win at this, will I?"

"We play more than you do, it's to be expected." Natsuki sighed, bored and hungry. "You guys going to come up? I've still got that left over pizza in the fridge. We could watch some freaky movies and game all night."

"I'm sorry, I can't tonight." Chie softened, she knew how lonely Natsuki got. "I've got to finish typing out my resume. I've asked the headmistress to find me a job placement as soon as we graduate. That's going to come sooner rather than later, and I'd like to go wherever Aoi goes. She turned her stupid thing in this morning. I haven't even checked mine over."

"Why not just stay here and work in the kitchen." Nao shrugged, the microphone squealing for a moment during her action. "I've heard they're going to give Mai a full time job. There's a few other ones opening up too. Can you believe that?"

Actually, they could. That's what made everything so annoying. "Mai's different, she's worked in the kitchen as an aid for a few years now. It only makes sense that they'd hire her." Mai had skills the school could use. "I'm not that lucky. Have you seen what I do?" They knew alright. It wasn't any secret that Natsuki had caused two fires during her times as a student, both while attempting to feed herself. "There's no way they'd let me near the kitchen."

"You have a point, but you two really should talk to the headmistress, see what she says to do. I've gotta go get this done though, so I'll be back on later, if you two are still playing." Chie sounded eager to leave, and after she said goodbye, she ended the call.

That left Nao and Natsuki alone in the voice channel.

The two of them were best friends, rivals to a point, and even went so far as to cuss each other out on any given day. Their relationship, though odd, was special. Nao was more adventurous than Natsuki though, and had plans that evening to sneak out. Nao only stayed on the call for a few more minuets before leaving to get ready for her date. Natsuki felt badly for the poor sap, but she turned off her game, and her television, sitting quietly in the motionless room.

The campus was filled with things to do, and she grabbed her key before exiting the room. She wandered the halls, knowing it wouldn't do much good. This area was the recreational side of the school. There was the pool, the sport fields, club rooms, gyms, and plenty of other amenities. Most students never got bored, Natsuki though, she was another matter entirely. Early in her life, she was a troublemaker, but now, she simply couldn't have cared about how perfect the walls looked.

Even if she could, she knew it was no longer worth it to make graffiti. She didn't want to scuff the floor, and try though she might, she simply couldn't break any more windows. At least, not intentionally. These people were good to her. Always welcomed her, cared about her, at least that's what she'd thought.

Her idle mind ran wild with memories as she took a narrow passage through the dooms. If she went across the sky walk, she'd find the residential area for the teachers and other faculty. Students weren't allowed down that path, but often, they'd try to sneak in. She'd opted not to cause a ruckus today as she took the stairs down to the lower walk. It too, was high off the ground. However, it led towards faculty offices, and that was her goal. She knocked on the doors, ones that once donned a gold plate stating whom could be found inside.

Unlucky for Natsuki, it was not who she'd been expecting. "Miss Maria?" She scoffed, although she thought she knew better. "Um h-hi. Where's the headmaster?"

"She is no longer under authority here." The woman was elderly, but she was not feeble. "If you have something of importance to discuss, I'll be happy to try and assist you." Natsuki nodded dumbly, confused about what was going on. Miss Maria been here longer than most of the other faculty, and as a house mother, it was her job to watch over the students. With grace, and a stance that screamed ladylike, she moved to the side, ushering Natsuki to take a seat at the table and chairs. "What can I do for you?"

"Mai, she got a job here, right?" Natsuki asked, her voice unsure. Miss Maria rolled her eyes when Natsuki began to fidget. When wasn't she restless? "She'll get to stay here, right?"

"The faculty do stay on call." Miss Maria nodded, and then took a sip of her tea that had been sitting there before the student arrived. "It would be inconvenient not to have them do so. Miss Tokiha will begin to move her things next week, after our current chef has left her room."

"Do you have anything I could do around here?" Natsuki wasn't very good at being a professional at anything, but she knew she didn't want to leave the walls just yet. She refused the idea of being alone, without the comfort of the place she knew so well. "Anything at all, please?"

Miss Maria sat there for a moment, looking at what had been one of the most rebellious students she'd ever met. The way Natsuki's eyes, those of emerald, sparkled in hope. "We don't have many jobs available." Miss Maria began carefully, Natsuki was...fragile at best. "The ones we do have, you simply don't qualify for. We need teachers, and now, a headmistress. I couldn't possibly offer you such a position."

"What's going to happen to the school?" Natsuki asked, a slight tremble in her voice. "Did Headmaster Shamrock quit or something? Go get her back...I'll bet if you beg her, she'll do it."

"You've got it all wrong." This was quite a predicament, but one easily solved. "I had her removed from her position for improper conduct." Holding up an elegant, yet slightly wrinkled hand, she continued. "I know what you're thinking, cease it this instant. It isn't any concern for the alumni here. The new vice principal shall arrive here shortly, and when she does, she will have gained an instant promotion. We will simply find a new person to work under Miss Fujino."

Natsuki's eyes about rolled back in her brain. "F-Fujino!" She shuttered, both shocked and appalled, she remembered that woman with a vengeance. "You mean the tyrant who teased anything that moved! Is that the Fujino you're talking about?" It didn't come as a surprise that Natsuki had known of the young woman. Natsuki quivered a bit, worrying her lip between her teeth. "She can't possibly be the headmaster, think of what she'll do."

"During her time here, she ran as the head of the student council. She gave the students hope, and many loved her for her achievements. Her father is a wealthy man in power of quite a number of companies, and he donated a large sum of money to keep this school running. She is well educated, prim, proper, and a perfect woman to take over the administrative position. The fact that many students already know of her, will only aid in her success here at Garderobe. They will find her an example to follow, and I doubt you could find better than her."

"If you want the kids to learn how to make someone blush so hard their cheeks catch fire, then yeah, she's good." Natsuki shrugged. "But, she's such a player. You don't want everyone picking that up."

Miss Maria lifted an eyebrow at that, coughing slightly. "It would be welcomed far more than you and your mischief." If she were honest, she was fond of Natsuki, her heart went out to the girl, Natsuki's entire life a mystery for most. The girl had to keep herself away from others, her truths concealed. Try though she might, Miss Maria knew there was no way to groom Natsuki into an upstanding woman. Kuga Natsuki was still an oddity after all this time. "Natsuki, you know it would be a bad idea to work here, what with your situation and all, this is a place only women work. You've grown up well, but you can't really want to stay, can you?"

"Playing mommy again?" Natsuki growled, she hated when that old woman used her first name like that. "Fine then." She huffed, crossing her arms over herself like a petulant child. "I've got no place else to go, and dad sure as hell doesn't want me around, not with his new family. He'd probably get pissed the first time I forget to put the seat down, the jackass. They're the normal ones, I'm...I'm just not." Natsuki sighed, she couldn't explain it right, but she knew she had to try. "I belong with Mai, and Nao...and Chie and Aoi. They're the only ones who care." She closed her eyes, tears threatening to fall, for even the briefest of seconds, though she dared not show it. "You guys care, he doesn't. He never will."

It was a misunderstanding, she knew that. Still, in all of her years of working as a Headmistress herself, and then, a housemother for several decades, she knew how hard it was. She could comprehend the struggle a child went through, the confusion, the abandonment. Natsuki had all of it, and it was a torrent that raged far worse than most. Maria Graceburt was many things, but she was not by any means an unfeeling woman. "You've never had an easy time of it, I'll give you that." Maria began, her voice strict and with meaning. "However, through everything I've seen out of you, and I will say you've been quite a thorn in my side over the years, you aren't a person who quits. You never give up, you're never afraid of anything, so why now?"

"Why not now?!" That was the better question. They both knew it, the nagging feeling was something everyone went through. It was the struggle of being young. "The entire time I've been here, I've been raised to be a girl, to be perfect and all that crap. I'm not a girl though, not completely, not like the way you all want me to be. Where will I fit in? Who would hire me? Better yet, who would grow to care about me, perhaps even date me? No one that I can think of. I want a future where I can at least wake up every day and be content with myself. If I can't be happy, why can't I just be me? I can do that here, I can be safe here, it won't be out there, and you know it."

Miss Maria nodded, she knew quite well. "Very well." Miss Maria sighed, she really wasn't overjoyed to agree, but the fact was, Natsuki made very valid points. If it was a show of the heart, or a feeling of obligation, she was unsure. "If you can tolerate being around Fujino, and be prepared to work alongside of her professionally, I will let you work underneath her, as the vice principal. However, make no mistake, this isn't a game. You shall do your work perfectly, and to the letter, do you understand." It was an order.

Natsuki knew it too, and she thanked the heavens it came. "Yes ma'am." She nodded.

"Good, then get out of my office. I don't want to see you until next week." The tone was aggressive, and Natsuki scurried out of the room quickly, she's been happy to receive such luck. "That child, always such a migraine." She grumbled in defeat as she sipped her tea once more...

A week went by fast when one considered all the things that needed to get done. Natsuki had always been a smart student. Trouble, always, but as a student her grades were always high. It was her saving grace all of these years. She could cut class, did it often, and her work would always come back done. It was in high enough standard that she passed her classes, more or less. Now though, while new students rushed to move in, she felt herself buckling under the same pressure. She hated the amount of books she'd collected over the years. Her entire life had filled her old room, making it cluttered.

She would be moving into a place far more comfortable than before. Natsuki felt momentarily giddy before sighing at all of her boxes. There was a full bathroom, not simply a shower. The kitchen was beautiful, the sitting room large, but comfortable. Here she was one floor above the offices. Her faculty living space, and one of the largest dorms no less. There was one thing that confused her though, one thing that made her uneasy.

There were two bedrooms.

"Don't you think that's a bit weird." She groused, as she took in both rooms. It couldn't have been a guest room, since both were equally furnished to standard. "I mean, who else would stay up here?"

Mai slapped her forehead when she put the large cardboard container down for a rest. "Natsuki, this is the headmaster dormitory. This is where both you, and Shizuru will be staying. I thought you knew that. I'll be sharing my space with three of the other kitchen staff. We bunk up in groups I guess. Then again, with how big this school is, I can see why they need so many people." Mai paused a moment, her eyes surveying her confused friend. "You mean you didn't know?"

"Hell no!" Natsuki shouted, not minding in anyone could hear her. "I was never told that, and did you have to call her by her first name?" Natsuki felt her belly doing flip flops. She didn't like this, not one bit. "It's so sickening that you do that." She went on, trying to release her pent up annoyance.

"She's always wanted us to call her like that before. It's not any different now." Mai simply assumed Natsuki knew that little tidbit. "Besides, I thought Shizuru liked you. Now the two of you can be friends again. We can all be like back then, it'll be great."

"We weren't friends, Mai." Natsuki decided to just carry the boxes into the room she was standing in front of, slamming them down a bit rough upon the desk. "What she used to do to us, man that was just torture. Her smile soft, her innocent gaze, and then, when you're least expecting it, bam! Just like that, Mai." She turned to the girl while pointing to the now partially battered box. "Sexual innuendo's, and not only that, but you can't escape them. I'm going to be living with the pervert that tops the charts." She turned to leave the room, there were more boxes she had to carry. "It's not fair Mai, just not damned fair."

The carrot-top went after Natsuki, following her back to the old student dorm. Only things left to carry were small, and easy to manage. "She liked you, ya know."

"I do know!" Natsuki sighed, running her fingers through her hair before she pulled out the ponytail it was in. "I just...she played with everyone, like we were her toys or something. Always made fun of us...I'm not cute Mai, I'm not, and I never will be." After she had replaced her ponytail, catching the loose stands that had fallen out from before, she looked away from her friend, her eyes finding the floor. "We were just a game. She took so much pleasure in seeing me all weird like that, it just, it sucked. I didn't know if I was coming or going, if she gave me the time of day, or just thought I was her pet."

"It's called flirting." Mai chuckled under her breath as Natsuki rushed back out of the room, boxes in hand. Mai decided she'd do the same, and then catch up again. When she reached Natsuki's new bedroom again, she saw the woman before her sitting on the bedside, looking lost, even a bit withdrawn. Natsuki had an image she kept up in front of everyone. A tough one, she was a woman never to upset. The cost was a dear one, and anyone who schooled with Natsuki, knew that. "I'm sorry." She sighed as she came and sat next to her friend. "It's easy to forget how much you liked her. I'm just not used to the whole lesbian thing, you know."

Natsuki nodded, but said nothing. It was her perfect cover, and she'd worked for years to maintain it. Many questioned her sexuality, but those closer thought of her as gay. It was easier than trying to explain something far more difficult, something as private as her gender. "Shizuru, she really liked you too. Sometimes I think you were stupid, not telling her about how you felt. Personally, I think this is a good thing. You'll be near her again, those feelings, they can come back, and you...you'll be alright." Mai was trying to be helpful, Natsuki knew that, but she still couldn't think of anything nice to say.

"Lets unpack this crap." Natsuki finally said after a few more moments. "Then we'll go deal with moving your stuff into your room."

"It sounds like a plan." Mai smiled happy to have the much needed distraction. It took hours though. They''d started not all that early in the morning, but it seemed forever and a day when they were sorting through things. Saving most of it, but trashing the rest. The entire song and dance took all day. The moon was kissing the sky as stars twinkled merrily. It looked like little glimmering gems upon the thickest blanket of black sea. It was beautiful. So much so in fact, they gazed at the sight a for few moments before saying goodnight.

Chapter 2

Natsuki's body was stiff after all of the lifting she'd done that day. First it had been her things, and then, it had been Mai's. 'She didn't tell me she was on the other side of the building, geez, what a pain.' She was tired. Her figure begged for sleep, her mind hoped for solace. She felt torn, but a shower sounded like a good idea, and like a robot, she methodically turned on the water, and undressed herself. The top half of her, that part was always easy. Everyone expected her to have breasts. It was what she should have, apart of who she should be. She was toned, a little muscular, but she didn't look like a man. She didn't feel like a man. She felt lost. Confused with herself every time she took a shower. Apart of her became used to doing things that others wouldn't have to do. Her life split in two directions, and yet, very ironically, as long as she was in the privacy of her own world, she didn't mind.

If she was alone, it didn't bug her when she stripped down the rest of the way. It didn't upset her that she was different. In fact, she could arguably say she belonged this way. This half life that was hers, and only hers to know about. She looked at it not as an excuse, but rather, an explanation. Why she felt like drinking beer and walking around in boxers all day, thinking that wasn't such a bad idea. Why she liked to collect panties and bras, she looked at them as a form of art. She was alright about standing to pee, something that she'd picked up from her dad as a little kid. Her mother hated when she did that, but to Natsuki, things like that just made sense. It was alright for her, being in between the lines of social normality. She knew others bent the laws of normality, she wasn't the only one in the world...

She'd just accepted her life to be like that, not normal. Not bad, not good, just not normal.

What was normal? She couldn't say she knew...but she knew she was a deviant from it. It was in her core, her soul, to be that way. One gender, or the other, it didn't change that fact. That rebellion she took such pride in. That attitude she'd work so hard on building, the foundation of her complexities. She'd come to love that part of herself, that defiance that made everyone else see her. Natsuki wanted her voice to be heard, wanted to lash out at those that angered her, wanted to prove she too, was little more than human. For what it was worth, she'd done it. Her entire life, she'd done strictly that. The full length mirror on the wall showed her the truth. Something she'd like to consider as a physical affirmation of who she really was. The person on the inside.

Not a man, not a woman, just Kuga Natsuki.

The water was hot as it fell upon her like rain. She felt beautiful when she closed her eyes, she couldn't see anything, her mind blissfully null of anything for once today. It was times like now that she loved the most. Times when she was free from worry. Natsuki knew, however, that it was a fleeting situation at best. She would not be alone for long, and privacy would become a very special thing, one she may not be able to acquire. 'You loved her back in the day.' Natsuki thought to herself. It wasn't all that long ago. A year wouldn't make much difference, at least she hoped. 'What are you going to do when she decides to invade every bit of privacy you've worked hard to protect, Natsuki, you dolt. She'll find out.'

Her eyes snapped open, and she cursed under her breath. She found her shampoo and washed her entire body with it quickly, she wasn't in the mood for all of her upkeep tonight, of which she'd have much of it. That was her nightly ritual, but, she just couldn't do it. She rolled her eyes, sighing as her entire body smelt of lilac. It wasn't her most favorite scent, but she knew it would do in a pinch. She was thankful the bedroom door locked, or she feared she's never escape Shizuru and her teasing. The pit in her stomach grew the more she thought about the woman, that blasted Fujino Shizuru. With that, she strode out of the bathroom as if she owned the place, a tigress that owned her kingdom like the devil she could be. Her room was all ready for her, the work of the day paid off, and she crashed into bed. Uneasy sleep took her away that night into a dream that she wished she'd never wake from.

In fact, Natsuki slept like a log. She hadn't heard a thing the next morning. Someone came bursting through the door with luggage. She couldn't have cared. Someone packed the fridge, she didn't stir a bit. When racket came from beyond her door, muffled voices, footfalls, and the slams of doors...it did nothing to disturb her.

"Thank you, for all of your help today." Shizuru bowed formally as she took a look at her room. It was already prepared for her by the time she arrived. "It will be quite the load off of my mind, now that I know I have a place for rest."

"Don't think anything of it." Rei answered a modest look upon her face. "I'm just glad you got here on time. This entire transfer is going to be insane. Besides that, I can't leave everyone waiting. Do me a favor though, if you will." When Shizuru nodded, Rei smiled. "Great! Listen, just don't tell Una about this. She'll be pissed if she finds out I'm still retaining my position at a different school. She was thrown off the board completely. Stripped of every title she had, and let's just say, she's still sulking."

"I won't utter a word about it." Shizuru promised. "Ara, this room is just beautiful." She said, mostly for herself. "The view is simply gorgeous." It was then, that she thought a bit, a new question seeking interest. "Tell me, do you happen to know who the new headmaster will be? I simply must know who I'll be working alongside."

"I'm sorry, I don't know." Rei thought a bit about all of the candidates that Maria had interviewed. "You know how that Graceburt is, she's picky about everything and everyone. I'm sure she's in the office though, if you care to greet her." She gave Shizuru a pat on the back and a soft smile. "I've gotta be going though, so I wish you good luck. This place gets pretty crazy, but I'm sure you can handle it."

"I shall see you another time then." Shizuru smiled back, but did not reach out to do anything more. "Have a safe travel." She called as Rei went out of the living area and then meandered down the hall. The fridge was stocked, the room was cleaned to perfection, and everything seemed to be in place. This was her life as a child, now, it was her life again. It hadn't changed a bit, and yet, she felt odd, being on the other side of the dorms. She disregarded it, the idea of lunch appealing.

It was then she began to bustle about the kitchen, her heart beating a happy drum, though, she simply couldn't place why.

Chapter 3
(POV, Shizuru's Mother, Suzume)

It was a bitter cold morning the day I felt labor pains for my one and only child.

December, what a wonderful time of year, what a blessed time to receive a gift of a child, when the seasons are at their prime. It is a time for a new beginning, the cold of renewal. It is such a pure time of year, just as I wished my daughter to be. It was the nineteenth that day. Shizuru was going to be an obedient child, I was most assured. I had heard stories of difficulties while giving birth, to my relief, I hadn't had such a horrible time.

She was such an obscure babe, her eyes were a darker color than blue, murky and untamed. She grew into a pair of blood colored eyes, so enchanting, and slightly unnerving. Fujino women had to be strong, powerful, and commanding. Perfect to a fault, and least I forget, the proper woman, one who could devastate any man.

Shizuru had it in her, even as a small child. She was always so independent, so free. I was always proud of her. Her father and I were happy she became enrolled into an academy for girls, one with high prestige and honor. She chose the place, her words were "It would be most fitting for me, mother, if you'd allow me this chance." My heart sang with a wealth of emotion that day.

Shizuru comes from a strong bloodline, we women we are not weak, we do not conform to our men. Rather, I'd like to think the Fujino women pick suitors who are there for our benefit. Something rather odd, I'm sure. Men rule the market, mostly, it seems. We however, do not follow the same little tune, oh no, that would be tragic. Shizuru was a smart little cookie, and she was bound determined to follow a path much like I had.

I could only feel happiness for her.

Shizuru's childhood, while mostly successful, also gave rise to a bit of a shock. One, I'll openly admit is not an issue, but, it would clearly be considered the worst situation ever to be held. She would not be courting any man. Not a single one would catch her eyes, and then I realized the truth, what blasphemy it was. She, a woman much like myself, was very unlike me. She sought out the company of another woman. She didn't seek out any man, and her eyes shimmered in regret when she told me she'd failed the family. It was a saddening experience for all of us.

I couldn't understand her reluctance, even to this day, I do not understand her whims.

Shizuru will become a better woman as she gets older. I will be proud of her, regardless of her choice on a suitable companion. It does not ease my despair though, that I shall not be gifted grandchildren. It makes me ache, knowing that she will not understand the happiness of a man, and that I will never comprehend her joys of a woman. It is a quandary that boggles my mind, but I simply must digress, my lovely child has become a young woman, she has hopes, dreams, so many things. I wish her well, although I may not ever see things her way.

Still, there are other little matters that complicate her life. Matters I will never speak on, I will not give her retribution, it would make her weak.

She left home, fled back to school. To run it, protect it, and raise the newest generation of strong women. How could I not be proud in her career of choice? She will be able to pick a proper suitor there, I hope beyond hope. Only powerful women, ones with pure intentions could possibly walk those halls, correct? A formal engagement, even if it would be put off several years, yes, even at that point, it would be a wonderful idea. There has not often been times when Shizuru will take my advice, however, my parting words to her were urgent, pleading for her to take away a bit of lesson to be learned.

"Shizuru, you must think carefully about the next few years." I'd told her. "People your age are young, and many want to be wild, to be free. You do not have the luxury to be so, dear one. I need you to understand, for your own good, to find not a fleeting trinket for your whims. Instead, search for the one whom you'd never part ways from. Seek someone you must have, or the world be damned."

It is solid, truthful, and for one such as my daughter, nearly impossible. That poor young woman, a lady in waiting...