Once upon a time, in a kingdom far, far away, there lived a beautiful and smart princess named Sherlock. Princess Sherlock was the brother of King Mycroft, the ruler of Baker Kingdom. What was that? Oh. Yes. Brother. Princess Sherlock was actually Prince Sherlock, but he preferred to be called a princess because he claimed that being a prince was "dull" and "boring."
Now Princess Sherlock was the smartest and prettiest creature in the whole kingdom. Many people look up to him and seek his advice. Although he was ill-mannered at times, he was still very famous, not just in Baker Kingdom but in other kingdoms as well. Princesses from these kingdoms come to King Mycroft to ask for his brother's hand.
Princess Sherlock, however, refused them all. He said that he was already married to the bees in his brother's garden, and they are a very jealous wife. Indeed, the princesses who come to the palace were chased away by a swarm of bees until they were forced to jump into the Banker River and swim to safety. Despite of his power, King Mycroft could not do anything to alter his brother's behaviour. There was nothing that he could do but to bury his face in his hands and sigh in between forkfuls of cake.
One day, the princess of Brook Kingdom came to Baker Kingdom. The royal family of this kingdom was known for their use of black magic and spells, and it was with caution that the royal guards brought the princess to King Mycroft's presence.
King Mycroft almost choked on his cake upon seeing the person standing in front of him. For the princess was not a beautiful lady, nor an ugly one for that matter. The princess turned out to be a young man with shrewd eyes and a dark smile. He did not make a move to kneel before King Mycroft, and this made the king frown. He was about to call his guards to take the princess away when the young man spoke.
"Greetings, my dear Mycroft." This made the king's frown deeper. "Oh, sorry. King Mycroft. I am Princess James from the Brook Kingdom, and I came here to ask for Princess Sherlock's hand. I suppose I have surprised you with my being a princess and all, but you see, being a prince is so.."
"Dull, boring. Yes, I know." Oh, good. Another lunatic.
Princess James beamed. "Good. Good. I did not expect that an ordinary person such as yourself would understand my sentiments. Very well, now, where is the lovely princess?"
King Mycroft was enraged by this lack of respect for his throne, but this psychopath and Sherlock seemed to have a lot in common, and besides, he was really anxious to get back to his cake, so he ordered his guards to bring Princess Sherlock to them.
"I see." Princess Sherlock appeared, beautiful as ever, and observed their visitor. "You wear fine clothing, you do not kneel before Mycroft unlike what the other foolish ones did, you carry yourself with an air of authority and class. Must be royalty. Star tattoo on the left side of your neck says Brook Kingdom. Oooh.. Fascinating. The Brook and Baker kingdoms do not have business with each other. In fact, we try to stay away from each other as best as we can. We appear to share the same age, and you have no spouse. Mycroft summoned me, so you must be here to ask for my hand. Am. I. Correct?" He smiled.
Princess James smiled back and shrugged.
"The answer is no. Marrying a prince is so bo-"
"But I am not a prince. I am a princess. Being a prince is dull. You know, just..princing. So boring!"
"Interesting, but still no. You see, I consider myself married to my bees, and while I am flattered by your interest-"
"Silence! Where are these bees you speak of?"
No sooner had he spoken than a swarm of bees suddenly appeared before them. Princess James, however, paid no heed. He continued to stare at Sherlock, and suddenly, it was as if the ceiling of the castle had opened up to let the dark clouds in. There was lightning, and the bees dropped to the ground all at once.
Princess Sherlock was horrified. "My bees! My precious bees!" He turned to Princess James. "Why you little-"
"Uh-uh. Oh, Se-bby~!"
A black archer suddenly appeared in front of Princess James and using his bow and arrow, shot Princess Sherlock in the heart. Princess Sherlock fell, and the arrow vanished. The princess, however, did not regain consciousness.
King Mycroft sprung to his feet, and with a flick of his umbrella, the guards charged towards Princess James. The black archer, Sebastian, produced an invisible shield, and try as they might, the guards were unable to penetrate it.
Princess James laughed. He laughed for a long time. He laughed for so long that Sebastian cleared his throat and nudged him.
"Such impatience, Sebby!" But his eyes were full of delight. He turned to Mycroft. "Now, Your Highness, since Princess Sherlock refused to give me his hand, I will take his whole body instead. I am such a sore loser! Oh, do not worry, my dear king, Sherlock is not dead-not yet anyway. He is just sleeping."
"If you ever-"
"Shh..Hush now, Your Highness, you'll wake the beautiful princess up. Take him, Sebby."
Sebastian obediently picked up Princess Sherlock and hoisted him over his shoulder like he weighed nothing.
"I'll take him to the Bartholomew Tower, where he will spend the rest of eternity snoozing. Unless.." A flash of evil smile. "Unless a prince comes and gives him a kiss of true homosexual love."
"Prince James," Mycroft began and received a glare from James. "Princess James, do not do this. What do you want? Gold? Jewels? Wait here, and I will have my servants give them to you."
"Uh-uh-uh." Princess James shook his head in disappointment. "You bore me, Your Highness, you really do. Well then, I'd be off now. Too-doo-loo!"
With that, Princess James, Sebastian, and Princess Sherlock vanished in a cloud of smoke. King Mycroft was left staring at the spot where they had been. Even with guards and servants around, he felt so alone. For him, there was nothing left. Nothing but him and his cake.