Don't say we have come now to the end
White shores are calling. You and I will meet again.

- Annie Lennox, "Into the West"

The office was sparse. Two desks either side, and a main desk opposite the door. The hanar hadn't looked around, responding only to the sound of their entrance. 'This one notes you do not have an appointment.'

Shepard hesitated for longer than usual. Instinctively she wanted to brandish her Spectre status and get to business, preferably with her fists, but Thane was standing very very close to her. He straightened, calm and collected. She clamped down on her anger. This was not the way he would want it resolved, and she had promised to pay attention to that. The strength of her own feelings were threatening to overwhelm her. And who was it who had followed them?

The silence stretched. Shepard drew a deep, dry breath. 'Nerar Natai is dead.'

The hanar swirled around, oddly elegant. '… Ah.'

Thane stepped forward. 'You are not the first who has tried to kill me, Karali. But you are the first hanar, and I would know why.'

Shepard shot him a glance, but swallowed down her question for later. Resolve this quickly, then clean up the pieces. She would have time to ask how he knew the hanar later.

The hanar hesitated. 'We know you have harmed the Enkindlers.'

''What?' blurted Shepard. 'We have no quarrel with the hanar, or with your religion. Like all other species you have a right to believe what you-'

'Shepard,' said Garrus quietly. 'The Enkindlers were the Protheans.'

The light dawned through the haze in her head, and the connections came too fast to reconstruct. She took a step backwards. 'Oh my god. It's Indoctrinated.'

One of the hanar's rear tentacles picked up something heavy from the desk.

The implications came roaring through like an ocean wave as they dived for cover. It was impossible. But it was the only way a hanar locked planet-side could possibly know that the Collectors were Prothean, and what Shepard had done to the base in the eye of the galaxy... Did that mean they were already here? Was a second Harbinger already lurking in the nebula veil between systems? Were more?

The rapid rattle of the hanar's SMG shocked her out of her thoughts. One problem at a time. Bullets clattered and pinged off the desks. Beside her, Garrus was unfolding his rifle. 'Wait wait wait. It can't talk if its dead.'

'It can't kill us either!'

Shepard suddenly remembered she had not altered her loadout from the mission to Long Reach. She reached up and back, and encountered the smooth grip of her blade. There was a break in the fire, and she looked out from cover in time to see the hanar bearing down on them with extraordinary speed.

No.

Blade in hand, Shepard kicked out and charged, punching into the hanar with a cry of rage. Having very little weight, and suspended as it was by a mass effect field, the momentum carried them both clear across the office into the opposite wall. Everything tingled and twitched, and the hanar had all its arms but one clamped around her and was holding its SMG to her head.

Judging she could take a few pellets to the head, Shepard twisted her wrist and slashed at one arm. Boneless, it severed with little resistance, and fluid and coral blood pulsed from the wound. The body of the hanar flashed a piercing silver, translated as a scream. Simultaneously there was a resounding boom, and the air sickeningly close to her head fizzed as an armour-piercing slug passed through and collided with the hanar's pistol. It melted and sparked, overheating, and her barrier dissipated. Shepard felt the hanar's remaining limbs go horribly tight as her shielding disintegrated.

'This... one w...ill ki...ll he...r,' managed the hanar, synthesized speech still eerily calm but with strained and illogical pauses between syllables. Her translation module interpreted the constant faint bioluminescence as a breathy wail beneath the speech.

She felt for her medi-gel with her other hand, with a limp, severed tentacle still wound around her wrist. 'Let me go now and we can help you.'

The hanar released her leg and wrapped its arm around her neck.

Fear poured through her like mercury, chilling her stomach and bubbling the adrenaline in her chest. Conscious thought left her mind. She struggled against the clamping limbs, but the hanar had done something to its mass effect drive to boost its muscle strength, and she was held fast. Its three fingers clenched.

'Karali.' Thane's quiet voice behind her, with a dark, shimmering edge to it. 'Release her.'

Dark spot pricked at the edges of her vision. Her knees buckled. Her sai fell to the floor. Her hands pulled and grasped vainly at the slippery coils of tentacle. '… hhhk...'

Thane's Warp ripped into the hanar's mass effect generator and exploded, and both human and hanar collapsed onto the floor. Lean hands unwound the twitching tentacle and strong talons helped her away from the gelatinous body. Shepard tore the air into her lungs with a harshness that burned her throat.

'Are you all right?' Garrus, the orange of his omni-tool flickering over his face as he released medi-gel into her system.

'Just,' she said hoarsely, taking the hand he offered and scrambling to her feet. 'No skin contact, thank god. I've had enough of being poisoned.'

Breathy, incomprehensible speech was filtering through her translator. She looked up. Thane was crouched over the twitching body of the hanar in the wreckage of the desk. 'Kalahira, mistress of inscrutable depths, I call upon you to grant forgiveness. Its mind was not its own; its thoughts tainted. Forgive me for my actions in speeding it to you. Swim fast; swim far...' He used its soul name, murmured too quietly for Shepard to hear, and killed the hanar with a single bullet.

Shepard panted, hands on her knees. Thane remained kneeling beside the body. He turned his head and raised his voice. 'You can come out now.'

Shepard looked around, and stood up straight when someone dropped from the ceiling. Another drell, green and yellow patterned scales with blue frills and snatches of bright, incandescent colours around the head. He had his hands raised. 'I'm sorry. I was under instructions not to interfere unless necessary.'

'… Feron?'

'Commander.' The younger drell lowered his head. 'I have a message for you.'

He fiddled with his omnitool while Thane stood up and came forward. Garrus collapsed his rifle. Feron projected a screen and loaded a pre-recorded message, and a familiar asari face flickered into focus. Even in low-res, the shadows beneath her eyes were obvious.

'Shepard, I... Perhaps this was not the safest way to accomplish my goal, but it was by far the cleanest. Let me see if I can explain this in such a way that you will not hunt me down and charge me through the walls of my ship.

'Karali was an agent of the Broker – until Indoctrination made him rather less effective than he had been, as well as a danger to his entire planet. He is not the only hanar who fell to the Reapers – their connection with the Protheans makes them highly susceptible to influence through artefacts – but he was one who was an immediate threat to my survival. We're going to need my network when the real war starts. Additionally I was aware of Nerar Natai's activities – bloody; messy... Too often she left a trail of destruction in her wake that had, on several occasions, severely complicated my operations.'

'So you set everything up...' guessed Shepard under her breath.

'You've probably figured it out by now,' began Liara, wringing her hands. 'It was simple to suggest to him that out of curiosity he run a search on one of his old associates. The events of the Omega-4 relay incident merely made the results of that search resonate with truth in his mind... I know Thane is with you now, so let me add that this could not have been possible had Karali not retained a measure of affection for you, Thane. Check his personal data for proof. I would rather you see it yourself.'

Thane shifted, but said nothing.

'I planted the idea in his files and suggested Natai for the hit. I also fed her mercs the information they required to track you down. They struck sooner than I expected. I'm so sorry for disturbing your downtime on Rakhana.

'I was aware of the risks, almost as an equation. I knew I could count on you and your team. I knew you would not fail, and I knew you would not be content with simply eliminating the immediate threat. Rather than ordering a hit of my own, this way seemed more... elegant. If slightly convoluted. But no suspicion at all falls on either outside forces, or you. You acted in self-defence. The unknown element in my equation, for which I am deeply sorry, was Natai. I have transferred funds to Ir'tasaha and to Long Reach to help with the repairs.'

Garrus put his head in his hand. 'Spirits, Liara, you couldn't simply have asked us to help you?'

'And now, I can replace Karali with an agent of my own, and the galaxy is less one indoctrinated hanar, and a loose canon of an assassin, if I remember the expression correctly. I made sure not to involve innocents. I... do not apologise for my actions, but I am sorry for the pain it has caused. … Take care, Shepard. I'll be in touch again soon.'

The message ended, and Feron shut down his omnitool. There was an uncomfortable silence.

Shepard turned, absently rubbing her neck, and stared at the body of the hanar. '… You knew its soul name.'

'Karali... was one of my trainers. Silver light filters into the exercise hall, halfway down the city. The ocean above is calm. Leap, catch, swing, pull myself on top of the bar and crouch there. "This one knows you can go faster." Flip off backwards and see the flutter of an ultraviolet smile between the ripples.'

She reached for his hand. He gripped her. 'Let's see what's on that terminal.'

Feron took care of the hanar's body while they searched the files. The video log, when they found it, was short and to the point.

'This one has received a vision. The master assassin is tainted. He has turned against the Enkindlers. He has split the tide with their blood. Speaking would suffice, but this one has more compassion than that. The Encompassing is inside him and drowns him slowly. This one has the opportunity to relieve him of his suffering. He would appreciate the thought.'

His grip on her hand went tight. Karali went on to detail the murder, as Liara had already described, and Shepard shut down the recording.

Garrus huffed a sigh as they left. 'It's hard, knowing it thought it was doing the right thing.'

'They always do,' said Thane philosophically. He drew a measured breath. 'Natai said something similar when we fought on Long Reach. She did not understand why I did not simply give up. But neither of them truly understood what it means to live in the shallows of death. To stare into the ocean is futile. One walks the shore but one raises ones head to the land. Even as the tide rises... there is restless peace in pacing the sand.'

'Are you sure?'

He blinked in surprise. Shepard searched his gaze, the darkest shade of green before black. 'Are you sure it's really peace you get from living like this?'

The loft was dark, the way they liked it. The tank flickered as the new dartfish explored.

Thane lay back, his hands folded on his bare stomach, and sighed. '… No. No I am not sure it is peace, but... I know that whatever this is, it is preferable to resignation and passivity. Now that I have... cares.'

Shepard propped herself up on her elbow and watched him breathe. 'You were ready to die on the base.'

'I was prepared to, but I did not wish to. The important thing-'

'… Is to die, and not to be killed.'

He paused. 'An interesting expression. Yes. The distinction is important. As is a measure of choice. Control. But… … Siha.'

'Hm?'

'Would you?'

'… Sorry?'

'If I wished to... If I asked you to help me. Would you-?'

Shepard pressed herself to him and covered his mouth with her fingers, feeling him suck the air into his lungs. 'Don't. Don't do this to yourself. You would never ask because you do not want it, and I don't believe you ever have.' She kissed him, driving out the treacherous thought that had coiled inside his mind. The logical part of her pointed out that the first siha he had named waited for him across that distant shore, and a thread of guilt wound about her heart.

'There is no shame in being afraid of death,' she whispered, hugging him with all her strength.

'You protect me from myself...'

'There are enough people out there who wish us harm already.'

'… And Liara?'

Shepard lay back and nestled close. 'She never meant harm. She never has. I wish she had told us, but I understand why she didn't. She probably left a link to herself on the Ifrit deliberately. It still seems a lot of fuss to remove one agent, but we were able to take out Natai.'

'Yes. But there were... consequences...'

She sat up instantly, stung by the loaded word. He sat up too and gently put his fingers to her upper back, between her shoulderblades. 'Is this to do with the mining station?'

'Indirectly, yes. My siha, I... I cannot stay with you. This sequence of events proves how I may be used against you, even by someone you consider a friend. And... it has proved to me that it is time I focused on my son.' He took her hand and rubbed her fingers. 'Please believe if there were some way we could remain together until... until the time comes, I would take it in a heartbeat. It's not over, Shepard. The galaxy needs to know that the Reapers are coming back, and it needs to prepare for war. But that will not be my fight. I am afraid it will be yours. And please believe that wherever you may go, my prayers will go with you.'

His words forced her to look at the one thing she had been avoiding for weeks. The Reapers. Casually cleaning up pockets of Collectors, she had been able to tell herself she was continuing her work. In her quiet moments, she knew the real job had not even begun.

Don't leave me.

Shepard found she had brought her knees up and had her arms wrapped around them. Her hands were clenched. 'There are no words to express how much I will miss you,' she whispered.

He shifted so that he was behind, and wrapped his arms around her, laying his head on hers. 'We will keep in contact. And you will find others to comfort you, in ways I cannot.'

'I don't want them. I want you. I want your quietness. I want your compassion and your goodness to welcome me when I come back. I want—...' She clamped down on her outburst, siphoning it off, bottling it. 'I want you to be happy,' she said, keeping her voice steady even as the tears collected in her dark eyes. 'And if you need to spend time with your son, that's where you should be.'

He buried his face in her hair. 'Tonight, permit yourself to be selfish,' he whispered, and slid his hand over her fist.

The bottle shattered, and the tears and hurt came down like tiny silver fountains. She crumbled.

'I'm so scared of being alone...'

I watch and smell and listen to her sleep, dark and perfect and still in my arms. Her passions have exhausted her: cowering fear and tearing pain and soaring love. She rarely allows herself to feel, so when she does it is like a hurricane, and she is helpless beneath the flood until the rains move on and she can breathe again. Sleep is the eye of the storm.

Growing as an orphan on Earth, knowing no family before the military... Then losing her unit on Akuze... The team members who sacrificed themselves so that we might live... Small wonder my decision provoked such a profound reaction. Deep inside her there is a very small girl who cries in her sleep for those she has lost and those she could not save.

Tonight I will hold guard over her. If the memories awake her I will be there.

She will never be alone.