Title: Use Me To Use You

Author: Wesz

Genre: Angst/Romance

Rating: T

Summary: Puck's mother decides that she can't deal with her son anymore, so she sends him off to Dalton, where he meets Blaine. However, the curly haired boy seems a little off and before Puck realizes is, he is stuck with him. Puck/Blaine, both POV.

Author's note: Welcome to my newest story. This first chapter is just an introduction. Chapters will always start with Puck's POV and end with Blaine's POV. Blaine's first chapters will be memories from his past, though. Please review, I'd love to hear your thoughts.

Warning: This para contains homosexuality and something else that I don't want to give away yet.

Enjoy!

Chapter one

You get what you give

Puck

You could say that Noah Puckerman had screwed up his life, but that didn't mean that the boy with the Mohawk would ever confirm that. No, he had always made his decisions based on the expected rating of fun he would have with them. He was careless, did what he was feeling like and would surely never apologize for his actions. When his father had disappeared from his life one day, totally unannounced, Puck was obligated to grow up quickly. His mother had been a broken mess and he had soon learned to take care of himself. When puberty hit him, he had already figured out that no one was ever going to assure his happiness. The only one who could that was himself. He had to create his own luck and that realization had changed him into a person that seemed to have lost his heart, empathetically, of course. The boy never thought about the consequences of his actions and he had been living day by day. Some people thought he was going by the carpe diem way, but secretly it had been his cautiously built up walls, which protected him from any hurt. He would be damned if he would start caring about people again when it had been proven to him that all they would do was leave him in the end.

Psychologists say that one's past shows itself in one's behavior, no matter how far it was pushed away to the back of one's mind. They would probably also say that Noah Puckerman was living prove of that theory, but the Mohawk'd man really didn't care. As stated before, the boy would do as he pleased and he didn't see any wrong in that. Still, it had somehow hurt that his mother hadn't been able to handle him anymore. It had happened on the night when Puck turned sixteen. He had gone out to celebrate with some friends and with the company of the always enjoyable liquids that contained alcohol. Blue lights were illuminating the living room in flashes when Puck's mom opened the door to let her son be dragged in by two police officers. Apparently he had been convinced that, even after a bottle of Jack Daniels, he still was an excellent driver. The police had thought different, though, and had forced him out of his truck only to dump him at the house that was called his home. It was after that shocking event that Mrs. Puckerman became aware of the fact that her son had spun out of control. Her life had already been falling apart and she found herself unable to take care of her own flesh and blood anymore. The painful decision of letting him go and sending him off to Dalton Academy had seemed a wise one at the time, but secretly, the middle aged woman hadn't known for sure. The only thing she could do was hope for the best and that maybe one day the pieces of her life could get glued back together.

Puck didn't show any emotion when she told him. An indifferent shrug was his only response when his thoughts about people leaving him got confirmed. He had quickly pushed the hurt that had been starting to boil in his chest away to the deepest part of his mind again, where it belonged. His hazel eyes had turned dark and hollow since he had banished every possible emotion. It had probably been the thing that made the boys at Dalton Academy fear him the day that he arrived. After a week Puck's roommate had already requested another room, but the Mohawk'd man was fine with the extra space and privacy. Sharing a dorm was for pathetic losers who couldn't manage on their own anyway and Puck sure as hell didn't find himself belong in that category of people.

However, Puck's robust and carefree appearance also had a good side. It seemed that his classmates had soon figured to keep their new enemy closer than their own friends and after Puck had publically made fun of the principal everyone was envying him. His popularity grew and even though the badass knew that they only liked him out of fear, he had been satisfied with the turnout. At least it reassured him that he was going to be the one in control for the next four years and that was a nice thought for a change.

But after a month of not having received any physical satisfaction, the Puckasaurus decided to take a look into a world he had never thought of before. It seems needless to say that his flirtations also worked their charm on some of the boys at his new home and soon Puck was back on track with his occasional sexual endeavors. However, like it always had been, he wasn't interested in a romantic relationship and especially questions revolving around his sexuality by his one night lovers was something that could piss him off in a heartbeat. The Mohawk'd man had never been into labels and he sure wasn't going to change that, because, as stated before, he did what felt good to him. And what felt greater in the world than an orgasm, right?

Because of all those developments and with the new, profound easiness Puck strolled through his new life, which made junior year pass quickly. Summer vacation was knocking on the door of his private dorm and suddenly the tides turned. The little black box of emotions was drifting to the surface more often, because he had been obligated to watch all his classmates go home to be with their families. It were dark days for the Sex Shark, because he was forced to remember that he didn't have a family anymore. He was going to be alone forever and even though he would never admit it, that thought made him sad.

So when the September air started cutting the brown leaves off the old trees on campus, Puck had decided to lock up his broken soul a little further away. The past three months had made him realize that he was still able of feeling and that was unacceptable, so he made it his life goal to never feel anything again.

But in order to achieve that total numbness, Puck had found himself in need of some helpful resources which he needed to could trust to the fullest. The nicotine in cigarettes and the alcohol in drinks soon proved to be perfect for that job and that's how he soon was totally comfortable with himself. His relief grew when he noticed it had also only took him one weekend to find his new tools.

The Monday after that weekend was the official start of the new school year. The familiar faces of his classmates had returned and Puck was pleased to see that they were still fearing him to the fullest. After he had taken the last drag of his cigarette he walked back to his private dome. There was an introduction going on in the cafeteria of the Academy, but Puck wasn't allowed to come, referring to what happened the year before with the principal. So with his hands casually in the pockets of his trousers, he arrived at the door of his dorm only to find that it was already open. Suspicion and irritation showed on his face and he quickly walked inside to see who had been making the stupid mistake to break into his territory.

"Good morning, you must be my roommate. I…err…my name is Blaine. Blaine Anderson." The curly haired boy voiced, extending his hand politely. Puck took a moment to examine him for a moment and he picked up on the boy's nerves. "I am new at Dalton." He therefore added, obviously growing more uncomfortable by the second because of the silence. "I just arrived a couple of minutes ago. My parents dropped me off." Puck just continued staring, enjoying himself with the uneasiness that was radiating from the boy's body. "I promise I will not be a bother and I will not change anything in the room. I do not mind, either, because I am okay with almost everything you are okay with." Blaine was now wiggling on his heels nervously and his hand had been drawn back, only to hang loosely along his side, not knowing what to do with it. Then, Puck saw his eyes lit up as if he seemed to be understanding something. The air around him changed back to normal and the boy turned around silently. He continued unpacking his stuff from his suitcase, sometimes looking around the room as if he was searching for something. He carefully put away his clothes in the empty closet and when his eyes noticed that Puck's nightstand stood on the other side of the bed, he quickly moved his into the same place. The Mohawk'd guy just watched as the boy unpacked, trying to understand why it seemed like he wasn't fearing him.

Fifteen minutes later Puck was tired of guessing, so he scraped his throat to voice his question. "You should be scared of me, why aren't you?" he asked, narrowing his eyes at him.

Blaine turned around to look at him, his eyebrows crooking up as if he had just discovered something useful. "Do you want me to be scared of you?" He fired back before quickly adding: "Because I can do that."

Puck frowned at him and shook his head. The conversation was already boring him and he figured that it wouldn't matter anyway, since the boy would probably leave in a week, just like his roommate from last year. "Whatever, dude, suit yourself," he therefore responded with a quick wave of his hand as he attempted to walk over to the little fridge in his room.

However, the new one apparently was a fast one, because before Puck knew it, he was blocking his way. "No, wait! You have to tell me!" His sentence had been a demand, but the boldness of his voice told Puck the opposite.

"Why?" He frowned at him.

"Because I do not want to be a bother." Blaine answered honestly.

Puck snorted at him, apparently the kid was scared of him. "Whatever." He decided to repeat himself.

Then the boy grabbed him by his arm, his eyes turning bigger and displaying utter desperation as he softy tugged on him. "Please?"

The boy with the Mohawk looked down at him with a deep frown on his face. He didn't quite understand what was going on and he already thought that his new roommate was retarded. "Just stay out of my way and you'll be fine."

Tears welled up in Blaine's eyes, but he then nodded affirmatively. "Okay. I will give it my best shot." He let go of Puck's arm and quickly stepped aside, his gaze averted to the carpet under his feet.

A deep sigh left Puck's mouth as he decided to stop trying to grasp on what was going on. The boy was weird to the bone and Puck really didn't want to take up the effort on figuring him out. He had other things to focus his valuable time and energy on.

And so he grabbed a beer from his fridge, oblivious to the fact that his new roommate was going to change his life.

Blaine

My parents are the most polite people you will ever meet. They give me everything I want, even though I sometimes don't know what that is. I think they are the best mom and dad in the world, but surprisingly, they aren't the people most special in my life.

"Cooper! I need help!" I yelled, aiming my childish voice towards the staircase. I was standing in my navy blue bedroom. My toys were carefully placed on their usual spot, because mom had taught me and my brother to always be tidy and decent. I think she mentioned something about first impressions, but I didn't know what that meant yet.

"What's wrong, little bro'?" I hadn't heard my brother getting upstairs. A smile grew on my face when I laid my dark eyes on him. Cooper was my everything. He always was so well collected and all the things he did were cool. I wanted to be just like him when I was his age.

"I do not know what clothes to wear." I looked up helplessly at him, noticing that he was wearing denim jeans and a white shirt. He exclaimed a soft chuckle at my problem.

"So that's why you're still in your undies, huh?" He grinned, poking my sides which made my body shock at the ticklish feeling. "But why are you having such a hard time? Just pick something!"

I felt how my eyes grew bigger as I turned back to the closet. My young body was tensing up and I knew I was getting nervous, since I was unable to choose. There were so many colors and so many sorts of clothing, how was I supposed to know that I was picking the right things? I didn't know, so I examined my brother again from head to toe, who was patiently waiting for me to get dressed. I sucked in my bottom lip and chewed on it anxiously before I noticed a white shirt on one of the hangers. I pulled on it and it fell down on my head, which made Cooper laugh and call me silly. I liked the sound of his laughter, especially when I knew I had caused it. He was my idol, so I liked knowing that I was pleasing him and that he didn't find me annoying. I was also glad that the choice of my shirt hadn't made him angry.

When I had put it on, I searched for denim colored pants. I found a pair, but unfortunately they were shorts, so I pouted as I pulled them on. When Cooper noticed my sad face he cocked his head to the side in confusion. "What's wrong, little one?"

I pursed my lips into a thin line while my gaze got pulled downwards. "They are not the same as yours. Yours are long." I mumbled while tears started to well up into my eyes.

Cooper chuckled at my sad behavior over nothing, which secretly hurt me, because I really was upset, but then again, I heard my big brother's laughter again so it was fine. "Well, that's okay, bro'. We don't have to look exactly the same."

Obviously he didn't understand.

"I wish we were twins." I muttered as a sob escaped my throat, completely ignoring my brother's sentence.

"Hey, don't cry, little one." Cooper had picked up that I was being serious, which made him ruffling my hair playfully. "Would it make you feel better if I was wearing shorts, too?"

A warm feeling washed over me and I wiped the tears from my eyes before looking up at him. "Yes!" I exclaimed in a relieved tone before I showed him a big, toothy grin.

Cooper went to his own room and I followed him, because I didn't know what to do anyway. I waited for him to change his pants and then walked over to him to look at us in his full view mirror. My head cocked to the side as I examined our appearances carefully. "We still do not look like each other." I thought out loud as I started noticing my flaws. My brother looked way more handsome than I did, even though we were almost wearing the same clothes. I let out a disappointed sigh when I realized I was just an ugly little person. Apparently, I had to work even harder if I really wanted to be like Cooper one day.

"Okay, I'm gonna go downstairs and have some breakfast." I heard my brother suddenly stating, already turning around to make his way towards the kitchen.

"Me too!" I voiced, quickly running after him.

The rest of the day we spent playing Cooper's, and therefore my, favorite video games. I literally lost every round, but I didn't mind, because it seemed as if the one I looked up to was having fun. Around five o'clock my mom came home and she shook her head playfully when she saw us wearing almost the same clothes. I happily giggled back at her when she made a comment about it, hoping that she was realizing how good I was trying to be.

"Coop, would you set the table?" My mother asked her oldest son when dinner was almost ready to be served. My brother put down the controller in his hand and he got up to perform the task he had just received. I didn't know why, but I started to feel scared when he left the living room, so I quickly followed him.

"I'll help!" I announced as I grabbed the plates from Cooper's hands.

It took me a year to finally realize that I probably wasn't going to be exactly like my big brother. I also didn't want to anymore, because I had figured out that I had confused my feelings. I still looked up to him and I still wanted to be around him all the time, though, but I didn't think of that as a bad thing. It was just that Cooper seemed to know everything and I found it hard to make my own choices, but he was always happy to help and do it for me. I thanked him a hundred times a day and when he turned eleven, I had made the prettiest drawing for him I had ever managed to produce and I proudly presented it to him.

"Happy birthday!" I congratulated him while he took the paper from my hand.

A smile formed on his face when he looked at it and I was excitedly hopping up and down next to him. "Thank you, Blaine, it's beautiful."

"No! No, you must not thank me! I wanted to thank you!" I was shaking my head vigorously to empower my words. "You're my everything, Cooper."

He smiled down at me and then my mom and dad announced their present to him. They were going to take us to a Theme Park next weekend and my big brother exclaimed something about it being the best present ever. Somehow, that comment stung me, but I pushed that feeling away when I saw that Cooper was really excited about it.

Three days later it was Saturday and me and my family got up early to go to the park. Cooper had been looking up the place on the internet and there were a couple of rides, especially roller coasters, that he wanted to go on. I followed him around the whole day and it felt nice having him near me all the time. However, the roller coasters he wanted to go on weren't for kids my age, so I soon wasn't allowed to go with him.

"Can I please go with you, Coop? I promise I will not be scared." I was showing him my biggest puppy dog eyes ever, but my brother still shook his head.

"I'm sorry, but you can't, little one," he told me before he quickly ran off. I pouted because I felt colder as I watched the distance grow between us. I turned around to my parents and a tear rolled down my cheek.

"Oh, come on, there's lots of other stuff you can do, Blaine," my dad spoke in an attempt to sooth me. "You can't be sad now, son, this is your brother's present."

I sniffed in response before I started crying uncontrollably. I didn't know exactly why, but I wouldn't quit sobbing, not even when my mother picked me up and rocked me back and forth in her arms.

"It's okay, baby," she shushed me, but I shook my head in disagreement.

"No! I'm scared!" I muttered in a loud, whining voice while I rubbed my little, balled fists against my eyes.

"But why?" she asked confused. "The rides are safe, I promise."

"He just needs to stay with me." I failed to explain.

I still remember the worried look my mom gave to my dad.