Llama #1: We didn't come up with the FML's. Google FMyLife to find the website. Also, ignore our weird authors notes. Llama #2 insisted they must rhyme. That's pretty much it.

Disclaimer:

We love Travis Stoll,

That much is true

But we don't own him

So please don't sue.

1:

Payback's a Bitch

Two Years Ago- Senior Year

Travis smirked, he had a prank brewing, and he knew exactly who to inflict it on: A brown haired girl with eyes the colour of grass, otherwise known as Katie Gardner.

Oh this was going to be good. Travis began to rub his hands together with a maniacal grin, chuckling deeply once in a while before realizing it made him look a tad insane; he was also in broad daylight. That wasn't weird at all.

Walking with a slight spring in his step, the prankster stepped into school, heading straight towards a locker he knew oh so well. Tearing a piece of paper out of his binder, he began to write.

Roses are red

Violets are blue

I suck at rhyming

but you're really cute

-S.A

He grinned as he opened her locker and slipped the note onto the shelf; now that was what got the ladies all riled up. He popped his invisible collar and strutted toward class, before realizing that he was at least half an hour late. With a shrug, he wandered around the school. He could endure one, measly detention.

Throughout the day, Travis passed Katie's locker many times, just to catch a glimpse of her reaction. Right before 4th period started, he saw her with a shocked expression and a piece of paper in her hand before crumpling it up and tossing it in the trash can.

Travis still smiled though, because just as she was about to storm off to her next class, he saw a pale blush fading on her face, and the first part of his plan was completed.

Over the next few days, Travis slipped more and more notes into her locker, until the final day and his grand finale: a little message taped onto a very 'special' box of chocolates.

Katie still wasn't used to having a secret admirer. For the past few days she has been receiving notes with corny love sayings from "Me without you is like: a sneaker without laces; a geek without braces; asentencewithoutspaces." to "Like a thief you stole my heart". She thought they were sweet, but how the hell were they getting in her locker? It wasn't like they had slipped the notes through the sides because they were placed neatly on her shelf. So someone either broke in and placed the lock back after or they snatched her combo when she wasn't looking.

That was hint number one.

Today though, there was more than just a note. There was a box, wrapped neatly in green wrapping paper, which just so happened to be her favourite colour. She bit her lip to hide a grin.

Could it be...? To her delight, when she unwrapped it, it was. It was a good thing that she forgot her lunch that day, because her secret admirer gave her chocolates. While unwrapping it, she discovered that there was a note taped to the bottom.

"These chocolats are as sweet as you :)"

Katie frowned at the spelling error, but smiled anyways.

And that, was how Katie missed hint number two.

It was lunch before Katie got to eat them. She ripped the lid off- hey, she was hungry, alright?- and stuffed one in her mouth. It was amazing... She kept shoving them in, one by one until the devil showed up.

Well, not the literal devil, but as close as it got in Katie Gardner's world; Travis Stoll.

"What do you want?" she sneered, glaring at his tall form.

"There's something in your teeth..." Travis said matter-oh-factly.

Katie gasped and started picking at her teeth. "Did I get it?"

Travis starred a minute before replying, as if he was deciding if the 'something' in question was indeed there, "Yup, now I gotta go bye!"

Katie blinked. That was brief, she thought. "Bye? She called out to thin air.

Not trusting the word of her arch nemesis, she pulled out her iPod. What she saw caused her to stare.

And stare.

And stare.

Her teeth did not have something in them. They were green. The girl in the reflection turned absolutely livid. Katie stood up so sharply a few heads turned in her direction. They turned back around when they caught the look in her eye; they didn't want to be on the receiving end of her anger, but they waited in anticipation for the metaphorical explosion that was about to happen.

She marched with purpose, and found herself right in front of Travis Stoll's table, right behind Travis himself. His brother, Connor who was in the grade below them stared at her before looking his brother in the eye, silently trying to warn him.

But alas, his brother caught the look too late and Katie already had him by the back of his shirt and pulled him off the table's bench.

"What?" He asked, surprised before he realized what was going on. "Hello Katie, what brings you here? And would you be ever so kind to let go of my shirt?- ACK!"

Katie yanked up, forcing him to stand.

"I'll take that as a no?" He said, a bit upset by how someone half his size managed to take him down. But you know, as they say, "Hell hath no fury"...

"Stoll." She seethed. She let his shirt go

"That's me." He confirmed with a cheeky smile. He rubbed his neck. "Thanks."

"Oh," She said with a cruel smile, shaking her head slightly. "Don't thank me."

"Um-" He started but she cut him off.

"Look. At. My. Teeth." She said, pushing his shoulders roughly with each properly enunciated word. "They're green."

"I know," Travis said. "It was a joke."

"I'm not laughing." She said, and pushed him roughly again. A few teachers who were on duty looked their way, but with a smile they turned away. Travis Stoll probably deserved whatever was coming his way.

"I'm sorry?" He tried.

Katie clenched her fists and gritted her green teeth before she spat, "Just you wait Travis Stoll, someday, I will have my revenge." Thankfully the bell rang just then and lunch was over, and so was Travis's chance to ever get a date with Katie Amaryllis Gardner.

Present Day

"PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR!" Someone shouted from behind. He could only assume that they had a stun gun pointed directly at him so he raised his hands in defeat with a frown growing on his face.

The police always ruined his fun.

"You're under arrest for breaking and entry." The policeman said, while not-so-gently locking cuffs onto his wrists behind his back.

They went through the normal routine; the police said a whole bunch of things which he pointedly ignored, and they pushed him into their pretty po-po car with sirens wailing and flashing.

It was like they were purposely antagonizing him.

When they arrived at the station they searched him again for ID, which he made a point of leaving at home.

An overweight man in a uniform that was a few sizes too small asked, "You got a name, son?"

"Nope. I'm one of those nameless people." He answered.

The fat man sighed. Why did they always try that? "Well, let's see if you're fingerprints show up in the system, shall we?"

He grinned. He knew his that wouldn't happen because he'd never been caught before.

But, then, his worst nightmare happened.

As soon as he walked in the room and was placed in front of a woman, she started laughing until her face turned a bright shade of red.

Another officer pat her on the back. "Are you okay, Gardner?"

Gardner nodded. "Sorry," she said between dying laughs, "it's just so funny."

"Well, now that you're done laughing, do your job and figure out who this wise-guy is." said the fat police guy as he pushed forward the soon-to-be convict.

"Oh," said Gardner, "I know who he is." She gave a dazzling smile to the convict with his hands behind his back.

Said man frowned. The police were indeed always ruining his fun.

"That's Travis Stoll." she laughed again. "Funny how things turn out, huh Stoll?"

FML for the chapter:

Today, I met a girl I used to make fun of in high school. She was taking my fingerprints after I was arrested. FML

The llamas bid you adieu and request you to review.

Because you know you want to - Llama #1

Or else the train shall no longer go 'Choo Choo' - Llama #2

... Um what? You gone cray cray?- Llama #1

Oh no, baby, that's just what they all say... say - Llama #2