A/N: Here it is, the last chapter. Thanks for reading!

-4-

Alex leaned over and put her hand into Olivia's hair and pulled the detective's face toward her own. Her hair was just perfect—shaggy and sexy and not too long. This woman had gotten even more beautiful, a beauty deep enough to drown in, and Alex was going under without a fight. "Olivia," she whispered. "Make love to me. Please."

Olivia wanted that, wanted to love Alex every day, and to tell her that she loved her every day and every night until she tired of hearing it or until they both ceased to exist. But she didn't want to frighten Alex, or overwhelm her with need. Holding her would be more than enough. "Honey, are you sure?"

Alex nodded, afraid to speak because she knew her voice would break again. The tears were still too close to the surface. She was sure—beyond sure, in fact—that she wanted this more than she could have imagined. Before she could leave here, and be another Emily, or Shannon or whoever, she had tonight to be the Alex who loved Olivia, even if she didn't feel she could confess how far gone she truly was.

But first, there was one last bridge to cross.

Reluctantly leaving Olivia's embrace, she slowly pulled her own shirt up and over her head, dropping it on the carpet as she steeled herself for the inevitable reaction. Olivia sucked in a breath—Alex could see it, hear it—and it briefly struck her that to anyone else this might look like a striptease, a come-on. But not to Olivia, and she knew that. The brown eyes had gone directly to the pink, raised scars on her shoulder.

"This is all." Alex's voice was soft, but steady. "All that's left of the damage that bastard did. And I'm okay, Liv. I'm right here, and I'm okay."

Olivia was motionless, transfixed by this tangible reminder of a nightmare she couldn't wake up from. Alex placed Liv's hand on the variegated skin, and the touch finally jarred Olivia, setting her in motion. Her fingers roamed first over the marks left by the exit wounds, then explored the corresponding scars on her back where the bullets had torn into Alex. Both women were visualizing the night it happened, the mundane conversation they'd been having right before the shots were fired, and the path the bullets took through skin and muscle, sinew and bone.

"Oh, Alex, I'm so sorry." Olivia finally breathed this out, only a whisper.

"No, Liv, don't," Alex said. She wanted the detective to look her in the eye, but Olivia's gaze was still on the scars, and she looked at them as an angry rebuke, evidence of her failure to protect the most precious thing she could imagine. "Please, look at me."

She waited until Olivia managed to drag her eyes back to meet Alex's own.

"I didn't show you this to hurt you, Olivia. I showed you so you'd know I'm okay. They're healed."

"But what about you? Are you healed?"

Alex seemed to weigh her words before she spoke. "I'm working on it," she finally answered. "It's you I'm worried about."

"Me?"

"Yes, Liv. You have to let yourself heal, too."

How? Olivia thought. Alex might as well ask her to perform a miracle. She'd known the scars were there, of course, but seeing them had opened up her own wounds all over again. It also raised questions about Alex's new life.

She traced the scars again, then looked into Alex's eyes. "What do you tell him?"

"Craig?" Alex asked.

Olivia nodded. "Craig." She repeated the name in a low voice, adding one more detail to her mental dossier on the Wisconsin man who held Alex at night, made love to her, called her Emily.

"As little as possible," Alex admitted. "Only what I have to."

Olivia nodded. That, she understood. She'd been with a few people since Alex left, once or twice each, only when the loneliness was buzzing in her brain like a swarm of bees. Never overnight. She also said as little as possible. Explained nothing. It was easier that way, for everyone.

"These scars remind me of the last time you touched me, Liv, of the last time I was me. And I don't ever want to forget that. And I don't want to share it with anyone."

Olivia grabbed Alex's hips, bringing their bodies together forcefully. They were both breathing heavily, and the kiss was frenzied as Olivia's tongue met Alex's, and then Liv's focus wasn't on the scars gracing the right shoulder, but on every inch of fair skin, the chest flushed red with arousal, and the soft swell of the gorgeous breasts straining ever so gently against the cups of a silk bra that was the same color as Alex's eyes. The detective pinned Alex to the wall with a gentle grip and a hungry gaze.

Alex felt Olivia's eyes as if they were touching her, warm on her skin. She reached out, drawing her hand—and her eyes—down the front of the brunette's red shirt, undoing each button until she reached the black leather belt around her waist. Olivia's eyes followed, and when Alex hooked two fingers in the her jeans, pulling slightly at the denim in her grip, Olivia let out a shaky breath and looked up.

Alex met her eyes, and didn't look away as she yanked the red shirt down her arms and off, using the garment to pull their bodies together. Olivia's need was already palpable, but Alex's abrupt and unexpected aggression propelled a wave of heat that rolled through her body, settling between her legs.

Their kisses were passionate as Alex's hands danced over the olive skin on display in front of her. She slid her hot mouth down Olivia's jaw and onto her neck, simultaneously unhooking her bra while pulling her belt loose from its buckle.

"Impressive," Liv murmured.

"I multitask," Alex mumbled against her skin.

"I meant the bra," Olivia joked. "You don't act like someone who's been sleeping with a good man."

"Another reason I shouldn't have told you that," Alex said, now alternating licks and gentle bites on Olivia's breasts while she pinched and caressed the nipples with her hands. "I'm never going to hear the end of it."

"But you did tell me," she teased, "and you can't take it back now."

Alex stopped a moment, cupping a breast in each hand and grasping them, kneading them, hard enough that it was almost too much. She looked directly at Olivia. "I can't take it back, but I can sure as hell make you forget about it."

She released a breast and moved her hand quickly to Olivia's stomach, then dragged her knuckles over the zipper and along the seam of Olivia's jeans, feeling wet heat through the rough fabric. Olivia's breath caught, and she put her own hand over Alex's, pressing it into her core, moving her hips to increase the delicious pressure.

Flipping them so that Olivia was leaning against the wall, Alex unzipped the detective's tight jeans and slid them down to the floor. Olivia freed one leg, then the other, and Alex took advantage of her widened stance to ease one finger under the elastic on Liv's black panties, moaning slightly at the wetness there.

Olivia took the panties off, and pulled Alex up over to the bed. She sat on the end, positioning Alex in front of her. Loosening the drawstring at the waistband, she dragged the soft grey yoga pants and striped cotton underwear slowly down Alex's long legs in one fluid motion. She lay back on the bed, and pulled herself back until her head was on the pillows. She beckoned to Alex. "Come here."

Alex obeyed, wouldn't dream of saying no to anything Olivia asked of her. She crawled up the expanse of the king-sized mattress and over the perfect body awaiting her. Straddling the brunette, she pressed herself into Olivia, enjoying the excitement building like steam in a pressure cooker.

Unhooking the clasp at the front of Alex's bra, Liv wore a lazy smile as she traced one pink nipple, then the other, and raised up to lavish attention on them with her tongue. This new position made Alex grunt softly with pleasure and she moved her hips in a slow, grinding circle over Liv's clit. Olivia's eyes were nearly black, dilated with desire.

"You know what?" Olivia said, her voice just above a whisper.

"What?" Alex was so ready for this, so wet and wound so tight, she was surprised she could even remember such a simple word.

Liv rolled her onto the bed, moved so that their faces were only inches apart, as Alex unconsciously licked her full lips. "I can sure as hell make you forget about him, too."

Olivia kissed her, consuming her with a fierce urgency before sliding down Alex's body until she reached her destination. She just touched the tip of her tongue to the bundle of nerves there, giving a few gentle flicks before playing her flattened tongue along the length of the slick skin. Alex raised her hips, matching the movement of Olivia's mouth.

Olivia was humming with pleasure, and the slight vibration combined with the feel of her dexterous tongue to quickly push Alex to a frenzy. "Oh, God, Liv," she murmured, moving her head back and forth as she gripped a handful of dark hair. "Baby, please, don't stop."

Baby. That single word, poignant and protective and passionate, might be Olivia's undoing. "You taste so good, Alex," Liv mumbled. "So sweet." The movements of her tongue varied—circling Alex's clit, stroking her length, alternately teasing and filling her—but the pleasure was unrelenting. Alex was close, torn between the desire for pleasure and the need for release. She could do nothing but beg.

"Inside me, Liv, please."

Olivia continued to move her tongue as she put two fingers deep into Alex, feeling the muscles tighten around her. She flicked her tongue rapidly, persistently, filling Alex with her other hand, finding her G-spot and dragging her middle finger over it with every thrust. Alex came with a shuddering release, able to say nothing but Olivia's name as she crested the peak of her arousal.

At 3:30, when Olivia came out of the bathroom with water, she found Alex at the window, forehead touching the glazed glass and her naked body carelessly wrapped in the bedsheet they'd long since torn from its moorings. Alex was so beautiful, hair loose now on her shoulders, that Olivia could have cried. She wished she could commission a painting, never forget the fair skin, the white sheet, the dark room, the city lighting the night outside.

She walked to Alex, lightly took hold of her hip, and offered her a drink. Alex took a sip, and leaned to set it on the side table.

"What's out there?" Olivia asked, as she swept aside the fall of thick blonde hair. It felt like silk running through her fingers, and Alex shivered as the ends tickled her shoulder blades.

"Nothing. Everything is right here."

Olivia didn't trust herself to speak, afraid that she would open her mouth and find herself begging to run away together, to leave and never come back. She lowered her mouth to Alex's neck. Alex moaned, a strangled sob almost, and put both palms on the glass in front of her. The sheet, freed from her grasp, began to slip from her body. Olivia pulled it completely off, dropping it to the floor, and pushed her own front against Alex's back, needing to feel as much skin as she could. Alex gasped as the collision of their bodies pressed her against the cold pane.

"Now," Alex said. And Olivia took her there, insistent but surprisingly tender. Caressing a hardened nipple, she wrapped her other arm around Alex's waist, reaching down to press the pads of her fingers to Alex's clit.

Olivia's senses were heightened, her awareness of the moment so amplified that she imagined she could feel the loops and whorls of her own fingerprints gliding over Alex's skin, moving in rhythm against the firm ass in front of her, creating an exquisite friction. They didn't talk much, sharing only whispered words of pleading and praise.

Tension tightening her muscles, her orgasm coiling in her gut like a spring, Alex reached back and pulled that gorgeous mouth down to her shoulder. "Say my name."

Olivia was happy to oblige, over and over again, repeating the word like a vow as she kissed the two scars, each representing a year already stolen from them.

"Alex," she whispered. "Alex, you're so beautiful. Please, Alex. Don't leave me."

Alex came, crying hot tears against the cold window as she looked out at the city and wondered if she'd ever be back.

They didn't sleep that night, not at all. Alex wasn't willing to miss a moment of her only chance to erase the greatest regret of her life. They had wasted so much time, and she couldn't bear to lose a single second more. The third time Olivia slipped inside of her, she'd sighed so contentedly, Olivia had said "Like a glove," and kissed Alex deeply. "Like home."

As the pink glow of the sunrise began to color the room, they were on the sofa, Liv straddling Alex, the blonde lavishing attention on her breasts, her shoulders, her beautiful mouth. There wasn't enough time. Elliot would be back at 8, with Hammond's goons, to pick them up. Alex wanted so badly to never leave this room, to make this last forever.

She was slow and deliberate as she kissed every inch of the beautiful body in front of her, until Olivia was sure she'd go crazy if she didn't feel Alex inside of her one more time. "Fuck me, Alex," she whispered, her head forward, leaning against Alex's own, and her eyes closed. Alex slipped her hand between Olivia's thighs, and danced up and down in the folds of skin, just brushing her clit, teasing, enjoying every second they had. Ready to meet Olivia's need, she finally admitted her own.

"Open your eyes, Liv," she said. Olivia seemed to struggle, maybe not ready to reveal the depths of emotion she was feeling. "Come on, baby, please, open your eyes for me."

She did, lifting heavy lids like she was waking from a deep sleep. As her eyes focused on Alex's own, Alex slipped two, then three fingers inside her. Olivia bit her lip, trying and failing to stifle a moan, but never broke eye contact with Alex, just stared into her eyes until she came.

When they couldn't put it off any longer, they began to get ready. Liv hadn't joined Alex in the shower, afraid they'd never be ready, and by the time Alex got out, she was a bit distant. Liv put it down to nerves, and stress, and decided not to compound it now by saying anything even remotely like goodbye. They'd talk after the verdict.

As they got ready to leave the hotel room, with just a minute or two until Alex's armed escort arrived, they faced one another in the bathroom. "How do I look?" Alex asked, forcing a grin. "Hopefully the sleepless night doesn't show."

"I don't think anyone else will see it," Olivia said, "but I think a lack of sleep makes you look absolutely radiant."

I can't do this, Alex thought. I have to leave you, and I can't do this. I can't walk away from you. Her smile faltered, a fleeting chink in the armor she'd resolved to put on today. Mindful of her promise to Hammond, she took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. Her expression was just a little different.

It was her game face, and Olivia had hoped she wouldn't see it while they were still alone in this hotel room. She felt a slight chill in the air between them.

"Thank you, Liv, for everything."

"No problem, Alex. Anything for a friend. You know that." She could feel that Alex was already gone.

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